My Laziness Made Me a Hero

I was just sitting on my futon, eating pizza. There's nothing much to say really, I was just... eating. I didn't feel any emotion in particular, but I guess I was happy eating pizza. I had spent all of my money on it. Not that I had much left, to begin with.  I worked in a company, sitting behind a desk just like anyone else really. There was nothing special about it. Eventually, I was fired because my boss's son stole my job. Ever since then, I've just been spendin' money eating and munching. But, something just felt special about this pizza. It was the last meal I'd have before I'd probably have to sell the house. Unfortunate as a situation this was, I just didn't care. Life had just taught me how to become emotionless.  My parents were long dead, and it's not like I had a sibling to begin with. I even completed all the good novels and mangas out there, so I was pretty much devoid of all emotions. I saw my favorite characters die, the girls that I liked, fall in love with the main character, and I'd seen the main character's friends all fight as if their lives were important. Realistically speaking, most of them didn't even do much. They just fought, gave speeches and died. I mean, they didn't even contribute in their society, so why did I even feel all emotional towards them? Sigh... Not like any of that matters in the real world.   Why was I even thinking of this? Was this one of those last minute regrets? Huff... I should get back to eating.   Just as I was about to eat the slice, the incident happened. A truck came hurling through my house and landed upside-down on my pizza box. I hadn't even eaten the slice in my hand, and the remaining pizza was already squashed. It just happened so suddenly, that I didn't know how to react. The last bit of food I had bought, was now resting under a truck.  I stood up, and yelled, "WHAT THE FUUUC-", but before I could complete my sentence, I could no longer feel the strength in my body. It was almost as if I was paralyzed in the moment, as my consciousness was slowly fading away.