What's in is Despair

I walked into school, really just wanting to go home and sleep. I was tired and bored, a headache already pounding. My coffee cup warmed my hand as I walked down the hall to my locker. It was spring so it was getting warmer but in the morning it was still cold as f**k. I grabbed what I would need before heading towards my first class. People around me seemed just as tired on this Monday morning. They dragged their feet along the carpet, mournful of the loss of the weekend. I stepped into the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. I ran a hand over my dyed black hair. The back of it was all spiked up but matted down into a fringe in the front. Ha, it's as straight as me. And my hair isn't straight at all it's curved and got a little swoops in it. I'm gay, if you didn't catch the gist. The bell rang and I sighed, not particularly caring about being late. I looked over my black eyeliner and piercings, deciding that my appearance was good enough. I walked towards my class, strolling into my English class. “Nice of you to show up,” my teacher remarked. I smirked. “Nice to see you too, Miss B.” Miss B is a rather young teacher. It's her first time here at this school, her third year teaching in all. She had this dark brown pixie cut with light brown eyes. She even had a tattoo on her ankle, but that was usually covered by a pair of skinny jeans now that I was getting colder. She was really nice and funny, laid back too. She hardly gave us homework and didn't care much at all about profanities. Her class is the only one I actually like. “You missed us partnering up for our projects,” she remarked. “Remind me to put you in a group later.” I nodded, going back to my seat by Brendon. I set my coffee onto the desk, setting my backpack next to my chair as I sat down. “Okay, back to the latest chapter of Catcher in the Rye, which I expect you all to have read last night,” she said. “Let's have a discussion.” She sat on the stool in the front of the room. “Any thoughts on chapter three?” She asked. Patrick raised his hand and Miss B called on him. “Well, Holden doesn't seem very fond of Mr. Spencer,” Patrick said. “Especially when Mr. Spencer calls him boy.” “And why do you suppose that is?” Miss B asked. “Because he assumed his gender!” Brendon called. Kids snickered around us and Brendon smiled. There was a light knock on the door and it opened once the person realized it was unlocked. The person walked in and saw us all laughing from Brendon’s joke. From the look on his face and the way he looked down at his shoes in discouragement, I could tell he thought we were laughing at him. The boy had long black hair and pale skin. He was a little bit chubby but I thought it was kinda cute. He was wearing a maroon colored dress with a silver necklace around his neck and a pair of black boots. He walked up to the teacher nervously, talking quietly with her. “Well, Frank, looks like you have a partner after all,” Miss B said. “This is our new student, Gee. You can go sit next to Frank.” Gee nervously sat down in the seat, looking at me. “Hey there, beautiful,” I said with a smirk as I winked at him. He blushed, looking down at his lap. “What does Holden feel about growing old?” Miss B asked as she placed a book on Gee’s desk for him. “Doesn't feel too happy about it, does he?” People shook their heads as Gee looked over the book in slight curiosity. “Have you already read this?” My teacher asked. Gee looked up when he realized the question was directed to him and shook his head. Miss B gave a reassuring smile to the clearly nervous boy. “We’re only on chapter three, there isn't too much for you to catch up on.” Gee nodded, looking at the horse on the cover. “Is there anything else we can now tell about Holden?” She asked. “He doesn't seem to care at all about how he's failing out of Pencey Prep,” someone said. “That's right, he's got no motivation,” Miss B agreed. “Is he able to pass a class if he wants to?” “Yes,” the class murmured in agreement. “How do we know?” She asked. It fell more silent between us. “Is there a class he's not failing?” Miss B questioned. “English,” Patrick said. “Right, so we know that he is capable of passing classes but he just doesn't care,” Miss B said. “Like you,” Brendon muttered to me with a smirk. I seat his arm as I laughed. “I've already been accepted to college, I'm good,” I said. The class went on as we continued talking and the teacher held Gee and I back after class. “So, the project is that you'll have to create a character map about Holden,” she said. “This project will last a while, until we finish the book. It's supposed to be done mostly out of school. It should talk about things about his personality based on thoughts and actions. Also, whether or not his actions at Pencey Prep and after he left were justified.” I nodded, looking over at Gee who stood nervously. Miss B gave him a reassuring smile. “Gee, this is Frank Iero,” my teacher introduced in hopes to help make him feel more comfortable. “Frank, this is Gerard Way, or Gee.” Gee looked up at me and bit his lip, his pink lip gloss matching the rosy blush on his cheeks. “H-hi,” he said softly. “Hey, sweetheart,” I replied with a small smirk. Miss B rolled her eyes, dismissing us as the next class started to fill in. Gee and I went in our separate directions. My coffee cup still had a bit left as I gulped it down quickly and tossed it into the trash. It was still pretty warm, but not as hot as before. I walked to my next class, ready to be completely bored. Classes past and soon enough it was lunch. I grabbed my bag, heading down to the cafeteria. I sat in my seat next to Brendon, setting my tray of food down. Pete, Brendon, Lindsey, Dallon and Andy were already here. Jamia came over, plopping herself down sideways on my lap and smirked. “Hey there, gorgeous,” I said. “Hi,” she said, a big smile on her face. “No PDA,” Pete chastised, throwing a piece of ham at us. I laughed. “There would totally be PDA but I'm totally gay.” Jamia laughed, getting up and sitting in the seat beside me. I chewed at my lunch, looking up and seeing Gee look around the lunch room. He looked so sad and discouraged. He bit his lip, tossing away his lunch as he began to walk out of the cafeteria. “Hey, Gee!” I called. He turned and looked at me, nervously stepping closer to my table. “Be nice to him,” I hissed at my friends. I stood up, guiding Gee to sit down in my seat. I pulled another chair up next to him and smiled. I took my apple off the tray, pushing the chicken nuggets towards him. “N-no, that's okay, it's your lunch,” he denied. “Take it,” I insisted. He quietly mumbled a thank you and took the tray. Patrick came over, sitting down next to Dallon. “I was just in the library and guess what I heard,” he said. We all looked at him in question. “I heard Mr. Johnson might be getting fired,” he said. We all cheered at that. Mr. Johnson was my math teacher and he is a total d**k. He was always on my ass about every little thing, even the way I write square root symbols. Like who the f**k complains about the way someone writes radicals? He was super strict too. He never let us have phones in class or talk at all. And, unlike Miss B, he believed that the students and teachers shouldn't be treated as equals. Despite the fact that a lot of us were adults or almost adults, he still treated us like we were so much less than him. “Can't wait until he's gone,” I said. “I love your shoes, where'd you get them?” Jamia asked. I looked down at Gee’s feet and saw a pair of black boots with two buckles on the side. “I-I don't know, it was a gift,” he answered. “Where'd you move here from?” Brendon asked. “Burlington,” Gee replied. “So one of the wealthier places, why'd you move to a place like Belleville?” Pete asked. “M-my dad’s work,” Gee answered. “What's he do?” Pete questioned. “Stuff,” gee mumbled. He seemed so uncomfortable to be in the spotlight and looked relieved when we started about Pete’s new tattoo. I noticed the way he took petite bites of the chicken nuggets, almost as though he was completely nervous. “You okay?” I asked. Gee looked up at me, blushing as he nodded. “You don't have to be scared, we don't bite,” Jamia reassured. “Well, Frank might because he's into that.” Gee turned a deep shade of red as he looked up at me and I shrugged. He looked back down at the chicken nugget in his hand shyly. I chuckled, looking over at Brendon. “Who's your English partner, Brendon?” I asked. “Who do you think?” He replied, pointing to Patrick. “I chose the boy who'll actually read the book.” I laughed as Patrick narrowed his eyes at him. “I'm not doing all the work,” he denied. “You won't,” Brendon stated. “I'll help by writing down what you tell me to.” Patrick rolled his eyes as he took a bite of his sandwich. I tossed my apple core into the trash, leaning back in my seat. I looked at Gee, who had a small frown on his face. “Hey, are you sure you're alright?” I whispered. “Y-yeah,” he answered. “J-just nervous about a n-new school.” I smiled. “Well, stick with me and you'll be fine, sweetheart.”