Faithfully Rogue

2: A Rogue interpretation

"People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that’s bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they’re afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they’re wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It’s all in how you carry it. That’s what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you’re letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain."

~Jim Morrison

(Alexander's POV)

I walk into the board meeting room and I take my seat. For every board meeting I've always been early and I wasn't going to stop now. This is the first board meeting I'm having in the company since my failed wedding to Rogue six weeks ago. In fact, this is my first official outing since then; I've done all the needed paper work from home and I've even had a conference call meeting with my other company in the United States but all have been done over a conference video call.

A lot has contributed to my decision to stay in, I'm not doing it because I'm scared to face the world after what Rogue did to me, but I stayed home because I needed time for myself. I needed silence, as well as alone time and going to work wasn't going to give me that. But as always, the world would interpret it into the way that fits their agenda and they did a few days ago. An article was posted which read Needing silence or afraid of running into your ex? I didn't need to read the article to know they were referring to my decision to stay in, but I shrugged it off and acted like I saw nothing and every media house that have invited me for interview I've turned down.

Rogue kept paying visits until last week. He'd always come over even though he knew very well that I didn't want to see him and hated the very thought of his presence. He kept coming and staying at the gates in hopes that I open and we'd talk. I had nothing to talk to him about, we were through and there was no amount of convincing words that he would say was going to change that. He tried though, walking to my car when I'm leaving to the supermarket and hospital and requesting for a listening ear.

After Lucas death the bad report about me went viral about how I married and killed my husband just to get his money and almost every man that walked into my life after that came either to contend with me or to see if I really was responsible for my husband's death, or if I was as easy as the world made me out to be. I dealt with each of these men according to their curiosity. I was unapologetic with my method of dealing as it gave me the satisfaction that I needed, but then came Rogue, the most complex man to ever come across and I was uncertain of what he wanted and why he wanted me. A part of me wanted to keep my walls up, but he was the player that knew his ways and he played his ball very well and now I'm left beating myself up for ever falling for him.

Flashback---->

I couldn't stand the sight of him, when he got down from his car and made his way towards mine and neither did I want to move my car without talking to him. I had almost lost my company to Alvin and knowing the relationship between them, I'm not ready to speak calmly to him. I usually just drive on and act like he doesn't exist, but that seem to be way too good for him today.

He walks over to the car, wearing a black trouser and grey t-shirt that hugs his body perfectly; his hair is in a neat bun displaying his wide beautiful face and there are a few stubble on his face, showing he hasn't had time to properly take care of himself, not like I care though, his health and welfare is no longer my business.

Once beside my car, he taps on the glass window and I wind down the glass.

"Hello Alex, can we talk?" He asks, desperation present in his voice.

My brow rises and I glare at him, "About what? What's left to talk about?"

"Please just give me three minutes I can explain everything, it's not what you think. I didn't betray you, not with Alvin."

"You're still going to play the betrayal card and treat me like a clueless fool again?!" I hardly demand.

"No, I'd never do that." He replies, shaking his head.

I get down from my car and close the door, "Yesterday I found a document among the ones sent home and if I had signed and returned it without carefully reading through, I would have been transferred all my asset including my two companies and BeautyFree to Alvin. Are you going to deny having no knowledge of this too?"

His eyes widen in surprise and it's almost as if he's just hearing it as well. "I swear to you Alex, I don't, Alvin and I are not friends, neither am I working with him."

I shake my head in disbelief, "I don't believe you."

"It's the truth! I'd never hurt you that way, you're the mother of my unborn child."

"That means nothing and you want to know why? It's because you lie Rogue you always lie! Should I even call you Rogue or just call you Ray or R because I never knew you and I'm not going to pretend like I did."

His eyes flashes with much hurt after I say those words, "You knew me, you still know me Alex babe, listen. I'm still that guy you fell for, the guy who loves you with all his heart." He steps forwards towards me, but I raise my hand and stop him on his tracks.

I glare at him, "Don't call me those names, you don't lie to those you love, if you and Alvin think I'm giving up everything I have without a fight, then you both have got another thing coming."

He sighs in defeat and nods, "Alex I'm not on Alvin' side, I'm on yours. I admit I did a terrible thing by hiding the truth from you and I want to tell it all to you now, if you give me the chance Alex, I won't lie or try to hide anything, I will bare it all to you, every part of me. Even the ones I want to keep hidden."

"It's too late Rogue cause, I don't want to hear anymore! Go away from my gate and I swear the next time I see you, I'm calling the police!" I say before entering into the car.

-------Flashback ends

I take a sit and wait for the arrival of the rest board members just like I've always done since the day I took over the running of this company.

Ten minutes later Ms. Idara walks into the boardroom followed by Mr Adewale and Mr Theon Zain. They each exchanges greeting with me before we settle down and await the rest that would join us before the clock hits 9 o'Clock.

Four more members of the board of directors join us up before the meeting begins and on my orders the door is shut and the do not disturb sign is put at the door for rest who would come after.

A proposal is presented and it is a business proposition of partnership from one of the largest owners of businesses in the country, Mr Dennis Agwu's and his proposal is partnership with our Nigeria company for the next three years and I watch the seven board members nod their head in agreement to the proposal read out by me.

"What is your vote on this proposition?" Idara asks, looking at me.

"I vote no." I reply and their eyes all turns to me, some looking confused and others just startled.

"It's a very good deal!" Zara speaks up pointing out the obvious.

"As good as the deal is Zara, I know the man making the proposition and he can't be trusted, everyone he's had business deals with has called him a cheat, a lier and a fraud. It would be completely foolish to step into a deal knowing all this." I answer, sounding completely certain.

I watch as the board members whisper thing in each other ears and I wonder what it is they can't say for me to hear, they have to tell themselves.

"Don't you think turning Mr. Agwu's offer of partnership down is bad idea especially considering how the company had been slowly falling behind in the last two weeks?" Theon asks, speaking up after a long moment of silence.

"What ever setback we have and are experiencing now is what we can recover from, but this deal will keep us regretting for the rest of our lives."

"The contract deal is just for three years, not the rest of our lives." Adewale corrects with a small voice as he pitiful stares at me like one who has gone insane.

"My decision is final, we are not accepting his offer." I say flatly, putting a stop to any other objection or disapproval from them.

Other proposal were raised which is from one from Funke Duke a new but fast rising entrepreneur hoping to gain more partner and although the proposal is submitted through Idara who hasn't been on my side through out the meeting, I agree we deliberate on it.

Funke proposal is set on review and two third of the board member including myself vote yes for her.

After the meeting is adjoined, Idara doesn't leave with the rest and as I put together my file she approaches me. I pay her no mind until she begins to speak.

"How are you?"

I raise my head to see the curious look on her face, "I'm fine, never been better." I give her a small smile.

"I'm glad to have you back here Alex. It is the best decision."

"Thank you, that's nice to hear and I'm glad you feel that way." I say, nodding a little.

She turns and makes her way towards the door when I call to her, "What do you think about Mr Dennis Agwu's proposal,"

She halt in her movement and turns to me, "What angle do you want the answer coming from? A business partner or as a fellow woman?"

"Both."

"Then I think you're being too conscious of the proposal which is very good if you make a mistake you are not just bad, women in powers will be dimmed unfit and prone to mistake, but as your business partner I think the company needs this kind of partnership now, apart from the bad reputation, the Agee ventures is one of the oldest and sure company out there and I think you're judging this proposal based on the fact that Mr Rogue Von Quaint made to you and broke."

"Whatever your decision I still think it's in the best interest of your company and I will support you."

"Thanks for your honesty and your trust in me Idara, I truly appreciate it."

She nods at me and smiles, "You're welcome Alex."

After a long and busy day I work I make my way home and all that is on my mind now is food, rest and sleep and as I drive the car to a stop, I get down from it and make my way into the house.

The house is awfully quiet which is unusual considering the fact that Lauren has been with us ever since the wedding period and Zander is also aways from home so the reason for the silence is understandable.

I would have loved to stay in the parlour and get rest, but instead I decide to go shower first and I make my way to my room up the stairs. Once in my room I take off my clothes before walking into my bathroom. I turn on the water in the tub and wait while it gets filled up. I notice my image in the mirror a little away from the tub and I realise that although barely fifteen weeks, my baby bump is already showing and that is not the only change my body is having. My breast are fuller and a bit heavy and it seem like I've put on some weight. This are times that I need Rogue beside me, his arms around me and his hand on my skin, trailing over it sensitively and make me feel safe in his hold and it sucks so much that he no longer is here.

I step into the tub and settle into the bathtub once the water is filled and my eyes flutter close.

"Can I join you?" I hear the familiar voice ask and I turn to see Rogue towering over me from behind having nothing on and my face breaks into a wide grin as I take in the beautiful spectacle of a man standing so close to me. His black hair falling into his wide beautiful face and his full red lips looking tempting and compelling. His shoulder broad and my eyes lustful draw out each lines of his body, from his chest and toned albs and down to his well endowed c**k and firm and hairy thigh and beyond.

"What took you so long?" I breathe out, raising my hand up and trying to reach for him with my hand.

He smirks mischievously and takes hold of my hand and places it to his thigh and raises it higher until my hand is slightly brushing over the side of his c**k.

"There were things I had to do first gatita, but I'm here now." he says, pulling me up a little further from the tub before he steps into the tub, settling behind me and I rest my head against his chest and sigh deeply.

"Don't ever leave me again."

"I promise." His fingers tenderly stroke my face, sending shivers down my spine and I begin to move against him, stiring up his still.

"I need you Rogue." I find myself admitting shamelessly and taking his hand and leading it to the part of me that longs to be filled and satisfied. He lingers a little over my small baby bump and he softly caresses me there until I moan out. There's something in his touch that makes me long for more.

He leans in closer and kisses the back of my ear as his hand takes possession of my core and slowly begins to flick my button and I moan out softly. "I missed you gatita."

I turn to look at him and he leans in and takes my lips into his for a kiss and although the angle doesn't give room for deepness of the kiss, it is what I need.

"I missed you too Rogue," I moan out, my voice vulnerable and bare of emotions I'm feeling.

His fingers sweep over my button possessively and move on to my arching core and stilling in his movements. "Please let me in my love," he pleads and my eyes narrow as I turn to look at him and I am shocked when I see Rogue profusely bleeding through his nose, mouth and eyes.

"Rogue!" I call out reaching for him and my breath cut in my throat when I touch him and he's as cold as ice.

My eyes open and I turn around while gasping for breath, but I don't see any sign of Rogue in the bathroom. I sigh in relief, my breathing coming down to its normal state.

I have no idea what that dream means but, one thing is certain I have to stay away from Rogue as much as I can because nothing good will come from it.

I finish bathing and I dry myself before going to the bedroom and putting on my pyjamas and making my way downstairs to meet Lauren and get food.

I see Zander standing in the parlour, wearing a grey joggers and a black shirt that seem to be a little tight for him. His curly hair in a pony tail and it seem he's dressed and going out, but that's weird cause I haven't seen him in a few days.

He has been living with his fiancée Havana for the past two days and he said he was going to come back today and so in not surprised on seeing him. He also looks like he's lost in thought and I begin to wonder what might be on his mind as I slowly make my way down the stairs.

"Zander," I call out and he turns to me.

He smiles widely as soon as he sees me and he walks a to me, "Alex, Lauren told me when I came looking for you earlier that you went to work." He says, before wrapping his arms around me for a tight hug.

We pull away and I nod, "Yes I needed to get back to work, there's so much I've missed and the home works can't always solve all. I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

He gives me an understanding look, "It's fine, hope you're okay and today wasn't too hectic."

"It was good, busy, but good." I reply . and, yawn loudly from tiredness.

He softly rub my cheek, "I'm glad you didn't stress yourself Alex you need to take care of yourself."

"I know," I reply then stare at him from head to toe, "you look like you're going out?" I point out, my eyes narrowing at him.

"Yes, I can't stay, I came to tell you I'd be staying with Ava until our wedding."

My eyes dims a little and my heart clenches in pain as I stare at him. These past few weeks has been terrible, he was one of the good things. I did get bored and frustrated along the way but he was always there and I made most of my complain to him, but now that's about to change and I know he would never return again.

When I asked him to move in with me many months ago, I knew he would have to leave someday, but I didn't think my life would still be a hot mess when he leaves and now, I can't help feeling sad. But nevertheless I do not want to be the person that keeps him away from the woman that makes him happy, whom he loves and so I'm going to be happy for him and wish him all the best.

"Don't cry Alex, I'll come visit." He assures, his hands coming to wipe at my teary eyed.

I sniff and nod a little, "I know," and I hug him tightly. "I'll miss you that's all."

"I'll miss you too, love and I'll always be available whenever you call me."

I pull away and wipe the tears away from my eyes, damn I'm too emotional, "I'll be fine Z, make sure you take care of yourself okay?"

I let go and watch as Zander takes his leave from the house, it hurts to see him go especially now that I need him, but I always knew this day would come so I brace myself and dare no more tears to fall. It is for the best his future and happiness is important and I believe I will soon find my path.

I wish him good luck and happiness on his new journey and I hope he gets everything he dreams of and I can't wait for he and Havana to say I do.

There have to be at least a happy ending for the Black family.