Black and White

1225 Words
Emilia Topaz didn't know a lot of things. She didn't know why parents let their daughter's walk out the house half dressed. She didn't know why girls would rather fight over guys than do school work. And she didn't know a damn thing about boys. But she did know three things without question: 1. She had better get A honor roll. 2. She was to do as told by her father and three older brothers without question. 3. Never EVER be alone or with a boy in a room. Emilia knew those three because they had been ingrained into her head without fail for the entire 18 years of her life. Emilia was the youngest child of Ernesto and Pamela Topaz. She was the baby girl, following three older brothers. Ricardo, Roberto, and Julian. She had sheltered and safe guarded from the outside world the moment her mother pushed her out. Growing up, Emilia couldn't play outside with other kids. She couldn't hang out with the neighborhood kids because her father thought they'd teach her things he didn't want her to know. She was home schooled, majority of her tv channels were blocked, and she had more websites blocked than allowed. Emilia's life was in black and white, she didn't do anything but study,read, and sleep. She had no friends other than her mother, and she wasn't in any position to make any. Finishing her high school years in the house up under her parents Emilia missed out on life as everyone enjoyed theirs. As she wasted hers. "Emilia!" Emilia jumped as her mother shouted her name. Emilia was sitting in her room's window seat watching the 'once every blue moon' rain. The omen of bad news paired with her mother's green eyes narrowed on her made her nervous. "Sorry momma, daydreaming. What's wrong?" Pamela sighed and walked closer to her youngest child. Stroking the long brown hair Emilia had inherited from her father, Pamela softly asked, "Have you made a decision my love?" Emilia looked at the pamphlets, that had sent her into her depressing thoughts. Her father wanted her to look into the college, online courses she could enroll in. But Emilia had spent her four years of crushes, friends, and prom in her room. She really didn't want to do that for her entire college experience. But she wasn't getting much of a choice, her entire family made it clear she wouldn't be getting any kind of life. Ever. Emilia sighed, "No. I need more time." Emilia had been looking at the courses all morning in dread, she knew her father would be grilling her at dinner. He would demand to know why she hadn't chosen yet since in his eyes it should be cut and dry. But Emilia was torn between what she wanted, and what her family wanted for her. Pamela sat down beside her and gently whispered, "I know this is difficult my darling, but I promise, it won't be so bad. Me and your dad get to be your college roommates!" Emilia knew her mother was make her feel better, but in all honesty it made her feel worse. She didn't want her parents as her college roommates. It sounded pathetic and boring. Leaning back Emilia whispered, "I'll have it handled in the morning." Pamela nodded and perked up and eagerly said, "Javier is coming over for dinner." Emilia kept a neutral expression as she tried to fight throwing up at the idea. Javier was her father's oldest friend's son, he was a soon to be doctor who had his heart set on marrying her. But Emilia didn't care about him or want to be with him. Her father wanted them together. Desperately. Ernesto had it in his head that he could trust Javier to take care of his princess and put a lot of faith into them happening. Emilia was warding off that talk as well. Pamela looked at her daughter and frowned seeing her so down. Emilia was a quite, sweet,and loving girl. But lately she had been more depressed, withdrawn from everyone including her. When Pamela walked out, Emilia screamed into her pillow out of frustration. When she got it out, she took it off and saw the housekeeper, Marisol looking at her. Marisol sat with her and gently whispered, "When will you tell them about the schools you applied to that weren't on a computer?" When Emilia just sat there with a blank expression on her face Marisol realized her answer and patted the small girls knee in sympathy. When she was gone, Emilia ran into the bathroom, locked the door, and walked to her sink. Leaning over the basin panting Emilia thought of the distant colleges she had applied to. She had wanted to get far away from the same boring sights in her Arizona town. But she knew if she was being realistic, her applying to colleges had been a waste of time. Swallowing hard, Emilia pulled the lid off her toilet seat and pulled out the little baggie hanging off the back. Seeing the razors, Emilia grabbed one and held it to her arm. All the pressure she was under, the lonely, despairing life was living caused her to cut. Emilia hissed but breathed a soft sigh of relief as she felt her nerves calm down. Her mind cleared. Emilia carefully switched to her other arm and made another cut there. Emilia savored her pain for awhile before cleaning the razor and putting it in her baggie. Putting the bag back where she hid it, Emilia cleaned her wrist, and layered on her chunky bracelets as always and went back to her room. When her mother called her down for dinner, Emilia spent the entire night in the hot seat. As predicted, Ernesto, her father grilled her mercilessly about the courses confused on what was taking too long. Javier, eagerly agreed saying how he regretted going to college because it was less impersonal and rushed. "You'll be learning at your own pace, and as brilliant as you are, you should be great." He gushed. Emilia nodded feeling her stress return and slid a hand through her brown hair. Her three older brothers, Julian, Ricardo and Roberto were all silently stuffing their faces. Ricardo looked up first from his grubbing and said, "If you need help sis you know we're here." Emilia nodded, "I know. I just didn't want to rush it and miss anything important. I wanted to get it right the first time." Roberto pointed at her with a small smile, "Nothing wrong with that sis. I know a lot of idiots that go into a field they hate and end up changing their major ten times." Ernesto rolled his eyes, "That won't be your sister. She knows what she wants to be." Emilia sighed when her father then turned his steely eyes on her. Javier then broke then with a smile, "Well whatever you do love, I'll support." Emilia looked at him and nodded, but she didn't want his support. She wanted him to butt out of her life. But that wasn't happening, her fate was sealed unless she was willing to give up everything she loved. Her mother, her father, her brothers...her life. But it begged the question, would she really be giving up anything but her oppressors?
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