Chapter 1

2184 Words
The sea of bodies looked as if it might swallow me up whole. I stared out into the dark mass, sweat dripping down exposed skin, eyes flashing with frantic lust, but I couldn’t find anyone that looked remotely familiar. This wasn’t any place I should be. I didn’t belong here. If the clothes and the hair paired with the heavy bass music didn’t give that away, then the smell of s*x and my own blushing face should have. The fact was, this wasn’t my idea. Two night ago, my best friend of ten years, came up to me with a brilliant plan for our 21st birthday. “We’re going where?” I dropped the bundle of clothes in my hands onto the floor. I was glad I wasn’t carrying anything fragile. Melanie, with her long curly black hair and high-waisted shorts that showed too much of her ass to be decent, jumped over her bed, giggling as she showed me the two tickets in her hand. “The Red Emblem!” I pulled a face as I plucked the tickets from her hand. “The stuffy club that charges fifteen bucks for ginger ale?” The tickets were thick glossy card stock. The Red Emblem logo and the club name was printed in red over the black ticket with the general admission printed on the other side. My brow raised. They really weren’t playing. Melanie yanked one of the cards out of my hand, a pout on her face. “It’s not stuffy. I thought it would be a nice idea.” I had wanted to knock her upside the head. She knew how much I hated anything that involved socializing, but the tickets were still a nice thought. At least she even thought about me when she was buying them. I gave her head a pat and sighed. “Fine. We can go.” Melanie jumped and smothered me in a hug. “But! You’ll be buying drinks.” “That’s fine! I don’t care!” She let me go and twirled in the center of the room. Her leg caught the pile of clothes. Before I could catch her, she fell face first into our bedroom floor. Her hand raised up, the now bent ticket shaking in her grip. “We’re going to the Red Emblem!” I could still hear her voice now as I pushed my way through to our table we’d picked. It was close to the secluded sitting area, but it was close to the open that we could see the dance floor and the bar. It was my idea to pick the booth in the corner where we couldn’t be seen, but as always, Melanie had begged me to pick a spot where we could be seen by all. This was her one night she was ever going to come here, I knew that only because she never liked going anywhere alone and I was her only friend. And it went both ways. I couldn’t tell her no even if it killed me. That was the real reason I was here tonight. I finally made it back to our table. There were four shots lined up and as I sat down opposite of Melanie, she threw back a shot and slammed the glass back down on the table. She shook her head and laughed. “Let’s go dance!” I slumped my shoulders. “Come on, Mel. I don’t like dancing.” I’d also just gotten from the bathroom. Last nights pizza hadn’t settled well with me. To further prove my suspensions, my stomach let out a loud rumbling. I grimaced. Melanie wasn’t having any of it. She threw back another shot and reached over, demanding for my hand. I crossed my arms and tried to move out of her reach, but she moved around the table and pulled me from my seat. “Jesus,” I said, yanking my arm from her grip. “Okay. Let’s go.” It was my failed attempt to not direct attention towards us. In the end, we got a few side-eye looks, but nothing I wasn’t used to when Melanie was around. She was the manic pixie that no one could turn a blind eye to. And if it wasn’t her magnetic personality that got her attention, it was her habit of showing off her figure. She’d been graced with large breasts in middle school and a small waist to go with them. I’d felt sorry for her, always imagining the back ache, until I realized it did her more favors than disservices. Nowadays, I didn’t know how I should feel about her body and her charm that could turn any inside out. Though annoying, it outweighed what I could honestly say was my moody personality. As we made our way to the dance floor, I felt the itch of nervousness at the back of my neck and along my arms. I was only now more aware of what I was wearing—a black shirt that cupped my small and almost invisible chest; a pair of skinny jeans that were on the edge of being too tight to be comfortable and thick sole black boots that put two inches on my height. These were clothes I never wore but had kept in the back of my closet because I liked how they looked on the model. Even though I knew I was thin enough to look decent in these clothes, I still felt like I was making an absolute joke of myself. Melanie glanced back at me. She gave me a small smile. “We don’t have to. We can turn back.” She knew. That look said it all. I shook my head. “I’m okay.” I was screaming on the inside, but this was as much as her night as it was mine. We never went out even when it was her birthday. Though I wasn’t tired of the nights alone in our apartment, eating take out, and watching reruns of PBS, I knew that she was. I would be a s**t friend if I was just going to bail on her now when she was this close to actually having some fun herself. With a deep sigh, I pushed my anxiety down. Self sacrifice. It was time I took one for the team. Melanie wrapped her arms around my waist and pulled me against her body. My arms fell over her shoulders. The loud bass of the music ran through my veins, pulsing with my heart, and rocking my body on its own. Melanie was already lost in the beat. Her head tipped back and her lips parted. She shook her hips, pressing her pelvis into mine. The thin material of our clothes was melted between our body heat. I didn’t know what else to do other than to follow in her lead. My heart was racing. I couldn’t tell if it was because of how close we were or because of the music. I was well aware of the others around us. They were enclosing on us, but they were dancing without a care. I turned my focus onto Melanie, swaying my hips to the beat and trying to follow her steps. It was an easy rhythm to fall into. The only thing that I couldn’t get used to was how close Melanie was to me. It shouldn’t be that strange. Girls danced together like this all the time. Melanie did it all the time on the rare occasions we attended parties. But it was never us. It was never me caught in this situation. Melanie came back from wherever she’d went. Her head fell down and she opened her eyes. Her eyes were shot. The liquor was already affecting her and the night had only begun. A piece of her hair fell down into her eyes and I swept it back with my hand. She smiled. “Hm. Thank you,” she said. She pulled me in closer until our chests were touching. Her head fell onto my shoulder. I could feel her breath against my neck. Hot. My entire body was on fire. “You feel so good,” she whispered in my ear. “Um, thanks?” It was all I managed to say before she ground into me. My hands froze on her shoulders. I pushed down the urge to push her away and instead held my ground. We’re heading towards a place I really wasn’t ready to go down. I patted her shoulder while trying to put some distance between us. She danced with free movements, her eyes drifting close, and her hands drifting down to my hips. Her fingers were sending sparks through my body. I wanted to push her away only so I could find my control. This feeling in my gut was too much to bear when I knew this would make things awkward between us. “Mel,” I whispered to her, but my voice was lost in the music. The warm bodies of the other dancers were closing in on us. We were being pushed together, closer than we already were. If that was possible. Then, her lips brushed over my neck. I tightened my arms around her. Her tongue darted out from her mouth and touched lightly on my skin. I tried to hold her still. “Mel, please,” I said louder. She pulled back, grinning, and her tongue popped at the corner of her mouth. She teased it over her lips. She’s pressing closer until I can feel her body trying to become one with me. I hold my breath, too afraid to let this moment go, but also afraid that I might want this too much. She’s my best friend. That shouldn’t make my body ache in this way. The mere thought of losing her because feelings got in the way made my heart skip. I licked my own lips on reflex. She looks down at them. I know what’s going through her head the moment she thinks it. Her pupils enlarge. Her breath quickens. Even over the loud music I can hear each quick intake. She leans into me, lips parting ever so slightly. But before her lips can touch mine, I turn my head. Her lips touch my cheek. She paused. “Julie?” My heart is pounding so hard that it’s pushing against my eardrums. I don’t want to give in to this moment because I know it won’t last. Nothing with Melanie does. She gets too bored easily and after she’s done playing with one thing she moves onto the next without any regard for what she’s discarded. I know this will only become a fun past time for her. She won’t see the difference when I’ll be the one coming out burned from this night. So, I push her away. It’s not what I want to do. If I had my way, I would pull her close and kiss her like I meant it. With my tongue down her throat, I would get lost in every curve and every inch of her body. But we don’t live in the kind of world that this would be possible. We’re best friends. That’s all we’ll ever be. Melanie is gripping hard onto my arms. “Juls, come on.” I shake my head. “Get off me. You’re drunk.” She pouts. “That doesn’t mean anything!” She yelling over the music, but even if the music wasn’t loud she would have been screaming. She does this when she doesn’t get her way. She tries to put me down. I would have fallen for it if the situation was different. I fell for it when she begged me to come to this club. She knows her pouting is my weakness. I’m afraid of what she’ll do when she realizes it isn’t working this time. I can see it when the disappointment hits her. Her lips pull down into a frown and her bright eyes turn dark. “You’re a cunt!” She shoves away from me, breaking her hold on my arms, and pushes through the crowd. I’m left there, alone, in a sea of sweating bodies. This night could have been bad. It turned out even worse than I could have imagined.
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