The Rockstar's Redemption

5. You’re not leaving today.

5. You’re not leaving today.

I pull my little wool hat down a bit more, trying to shield myself from the freezing night air. Jason walks beside me, chattering about something I’m not really paying attention to anymore because my mind feels like it’s inside a bubble, and all I want is to eat something delicious and then sleep deeply.

I grimace at the thought that what awaits me isn’t my bed, but the sofa.

Stupid Willa, giving your bed to a stranger.

I yawn into my hand, glancing at Jason without really seeing him as we leave the hospital.

“Do you want me to walk you home?”

“No,” I say immediately, “I’ll be fine.”

Jase frowns, looking at me with what seems like sadness and a hint of disappointment in his eyes. I hold his gaze for just a moment before looking away, uncomfortable.

Things will never be the same again, I think wistfully.

“I think I’ll walk with you,” he says suddenly, draping his arm over my shoulders. Then he leans close to my ear and whispers, “That guy won’t stop staring at you. Better not be alone.”

I glance over my shoulder, searching for the man he’s talking about. My tired eyes land on the silhouette of someone leaning against a lamppost. He’s wearing a hooded jacket that hides most of his face, but I don’t need to see it to know who it is.

I recognize that careless ‘don’t-give-a-s**t’ stance mixed with ‘I’m-the-king-of-the-world-everyone-bow’ energy.

And, of course, I can’t miss the irony that I bought that jacket for him at a thrift store.

It’s Reid Colleman.

Standing in front of the hospital. Waiting… for me.

My feet move toward him instinctively, feeling utterly confused.

Why is he doing this?

Reid’s eyes land on me, then Jason beside me, then drop to the ground, hiding his face under the hood. And then I get it.

Holy s**t.

Jason can’t see him.

But it’s too late.

My best friend is already asking, “Do you know him?”

I freeze, looking from Jason to Reid.

“I… uh…”

Before I can say anything, I feel Reid’s presence next to me.

What the hell is he doing?!

“Shall we go?” he asks in his deep voice, sending a shiver down my spine.

Jason stares at him, and I notice the exact moment when he connects the dots.

“You look like someone…”

“Yes, he’s my cousin,” I say quickly, laughing—“aren’t we identical?”

I grab Reid’s jaw with one hand and shake it side to side roughly. Then I stand on my tiptoes, pressing our cheeks together so Jason can compare.

This man is going to give me a heart attack!

“Willa,” Jason shakes his head, “you never told me about any cousin.”

“No?” I laugh louder, almost hysterically, terrified Reid will be discovered. “How strange! Be… Be… Benedicto is my favorite cousin. He’s come to stay with me for a while.”

“You’re named after the Pope? Benedict XVI?” Jason asks directly, a mix of horror and disbelief in his voice.

Reid grunts under his breath and takes a step away from me, hands in the jacket pockets. Then he averts his gaze, hiding Jase’s view of him, ignoring us completely.

This man is seriously going to let me handle this alone.

And why does he look so angry?

“Benedicto and I have to go,” I stammer to my best friend, seeing that Reid isn’t going to cooperate, but Jase keeps his eyes glued to the rock star, not listening to me.

Oh, no.

Oh, no!

OH, NO!

“You look so much like this singer…” Jason waves his fingers in the air, like trying to catch the missing name—“Reid! Reid Colleman! Hasn’t anyone told you?”

I start sweating, my hands trembling.

I’m about to have a breakdown. Right here.

Reid just shrugs and looks away, hiding his face even more.

“They tell you all the time!” I shout, laughing way too hard, which makes Jase look at me like I’m insane and Reid snort in annoyance. “Everyone tells you! ‘Hey, bro, you look like that rock star, Reid Colleman! Yeah, yeah, that rock singer, the one with the woman’s hair!’ They’re identical! But me…” I point to myself, “I just laugh. God, have you seen Reid Colleman, Jase?! The man is ridiculously handsome! Meanwhile, Benedicto is ugly as hell. No offense, cousin,” I pat him.

Reid shoots me a murderous look. I ignore it and continue my verbal diarrhea: “They even say he’s literally Reid! But what stupidity! Reid Colleman should be on tour for his latest album In the Dark! My cousin? Please, my cousin wouldn’t even have a place to crash!”

I stop talking. And the three of us are trapped in silence so uncomfortable it’s unbearable, growing more tense by the second.

Reid looks aside, pretending we don’t exist.

Jason looks at me as if I’ve lost my mind.

And I… I look from Jason to Reid, my eyes ping-ponging between them.

“I get it,” Jase laughs nervously and steps back, glancing over his shoulder toward the road to his house. “Well, nice to meet you, Benedicto. See you tomorrow, Willa. I think you need rest; work was rough today.”

“Great!” I shout, waving my hand with too much excitement.

Jason glances one last time, from Reid to me, and steps back murmuring something that sounds like “she needs sleep, that’s all.”

The moment he leaves, Reid and I fall into an awkward silence. I keep my eyes on my hands, fidgeting with my fingers, unable to look at him. No matter how hard I try, I always end up embarrassed in front of him. But it’s his fault! How could he just leave like that, like nothing happened? And why do I seem more worried than he is?

“Shall we go?” That’s all he says.

I slowly lift my gaze and look at him from under my lashes. Reid meets my eyes, expressionless, waiting. I nod quickly at his question, grateful for his few words for the first time.

He turns and starts walking. I freeze for a few seconds, but when I notice he’s already moving away, I react and run to catch up, matching his pace.

“You didn’t have to wait for me,” I whisper, nervously pulling at my cold fingers.

“I thought you weren’t a fan,” he says suddenly.

His words catch me off guard.

“What?”

“You know I’m in the middle of my latest album tour,” he says without looking at me, eyes fixed on the path ahead—“you even know the title.”

How do I say this without dying of embarrassment?

Okay… here goes.

“Actually… I looked you up online,” I blurt out, so fast it barely makes sense.

“What?”

“What?” I repeat immediately, pretending innocence.

“I didn’t understand that. You spoke too fast.”

“Oh,” a giggle escapes me, and I pull my hat down so hard it covers my eyes. “Oops,” I laugh at myself and my clumsiness. Somehow, I manage to fix it again, just where it belongs. Then, with a bit more dignity (and less air), I confess: “I looked you up online.”

I wait for him to get mad, so I don’t look at him. I don’t want to see his expression when he says something angrily.

But nothing comes out of Reid’s mouth.

When I finally dare to look up, I see he’s still indifferent, walking calmly beside me, eyes on the path ahead.

I mutter to myself quietly, scolding myself. Reid shoots me fleeting glances every few seconds, and no matter how hard I try, my muttering doesn’t stop. I’m too clumsy around him, and I have to remind myself to shut up… in order to shut up.

“Shall we stop at a Walmart?”

“Huh?” I look at him, confused by his question.

“There’s no more chocolate, it’s all gone. Shall we stop at a Walmart and buy some?”

My brain takes a few seconds to process that he’s asking to stop at the store for chocolate.

I nod frantically. He barely nods once and looks forward, walking silently.

The street is deserted, so he doesn’t need to hide, but still, his hood does a great job covering part of his face. Especially that long, messy hair, so characteristic of Reid Colleman.

We enter the empty Walmart. I head straight for the chocolate section but feel his constant presence at my side, watching every move. He’s making me more nervous by the second, so, needing a breather, I say, “Can you get a pear cheese and bring it here? Skimmed, please.”

Reid stands by me, looking reluctant to do me the favor. But finally, he nods and disappears toward the cheese section.

I sigh, trying to calm myself.

I’m clumsy, scatterbrained, and sometimes reckless, but with Reid, those flaws seem amplified.

I take my time picking out the chocolate, pretending indecision over the brand I always buy. When I’ve scolded myself enough and feel ready to stop being embarrassed in front of Reid, I go to look for him in the cheese section.

I find him standing in front of the large refrigerator, holding three cheeses, examining each with narrowed eyes.

“Can’t find it?” I ask, confused.

Reid just looks up from the cheeses at me, silent.

I step closer and glance at the ones he’s holding.

“It’s this one,” I say, grabbing the correct one and looking at him, confused. “Why were you taking so long?”

Reid opens his mouth like he’s going to answer, then immediately changes his mind; he shuts it tightly, jaw tense, a shadow crossing his eyes.

Suddenly, there’s a dark fire in them I’ve never seen before.

What’s wrong with him?

I look at him like he’s lost his mind as he walks past me, angry, straight toward the checkout.

I follow, not understanding this strange rock star.

He’s so confusing… he’s going to give me, on top of a heart attack, a concussion.

The elderly cashier smiles when she sees me, recognizing me.

“Willa, my girl, here for your chocolate?”

“Yes, Grace,” I hand over the chocolate and cheese, “how’s your day been?”

We have a small chat about her day and mine. The sweet older woman glances at Reid but doesn’t ask about him. I blush realizing the mischievous smile escaping her, thinking he’s my boyfriend.

Nervous again about Grace’s wrong idea about us, I take out my wallet to pay.

Oh, no.

I look at the only bill left in my wallet, then at the total on the register.

Not enough.

I feel Reid’s gaze on me, heavier than ever. I suspect he already knows my lack of funds is because of him. My cheeks immediately heat up. Even though all my money went to his medicines, clothes, and food, the situation is still embarrassing.

Definitely, today is a day to embarrass myself in front of Reid.

I look at Grace, unsure what to do.

“I’ll just take the chocolate,” I decide in the end.

Grace smiles sweetly and shakes her head before handing me both the cheese and chocolate.

“Why don’t you give me the full amount tomorrow? I know it’s payday. Meanwhile, I’ll lend it to you.”

I bite my lip, hesitating.

This has never happened before, and even though I don’t live in luxury, money has never been a problem. Really, this is humiliating. Even more so with Reid present.

But I want the cheese so badly I give in to my cravings. I nod with a smile. Just as I’m about to thank Grace, Reid storms out of Walmart, furious.

He’s so confusing.

I smile at the sweet woman in thanks and hurry outside, even more embarrassed by my supposed boyfriend’s rude behavior.

Reid waits for me outside the store, standing rigid, hands tensely in his jacket pockets. As soon as I reach him, he grabs the bag without a word and starts walking. I’ve never seen him so dark… so angry.

And I don’t even know what I did wrong.

I sigh tiredly and follow, struggling to match his long, fast strides.

The air between us turns sour as we walk home. Reid keeps clenching his jaw as if he wants to crush his teeth and holds the bag like he hates it.

As soon as we cross the door, he drops the bag on the table and rushes to his room.

A door slams, echoing through the house.

Exhausted, I prepare the chocolate, cut a generous slice of cheese, and eat it in the night’s silence.

When I finish, I go to the bedroom without looking at Reid and freshen up before bed.

Not even five minutes after lying on the sofa, trying to fall asleep, I hear the bedroom door open.

My body trembles under the sheets, as if it already knows what’s coming.

My breath quickens as I see his shadow in front of me. Then, without asking, he takes me in his arms and carries me to his room—my room. I feel so confused that nothing comes out of my lips, not even when he does what he did the night before.

Silently, he lies behind me, molding my back against his chest. Slowly, with confident, sure touch, his hand caresses my silhouette, his palm pressing my skin as it travels downward, fingers searching the end of my messy shirt.

We both sigh heavily as his warm fingers find my bare skin. He grips my hip, fingertips almost touching my inner thigh. Reid buries his nose in the back of my neck, holding me close, breathing me in.

“Reid…” I finally manage to say.

“You’re not leaving today,” he growls against my skin, pressing my hip tighter.

A trembling sigh escapes me, and I don’t know what to do. This isn’t right, I’m aware. But as I debate what I should do, my tired body begins to fall asleep in the refuge of his arms, even more so as his fingers slowly caress the bare skin of my hip, just a little toward my inner thigh, as if convincing me to stay.

The last thing I’m conscious of that night is soft lips kissing my nape.

Then, there’s only a warm, beautiful comfort.