High Plains Heartbreak

Chapter 2-1

Chapter 2“What will happen now?”

Jesse opened his eyes and groaned. His neck felt as though Mercury had been sitting on it. Sun blasted through the windows, stinging his eyes so he had to squint to see Addie standing before him, extending a cup of coffee. He accepted it gratefully, taking a sip of the scalding liquid as he blinked several times trying to clear away the scratchy, dry sensation. He felt like he'd been pushed, face-first, into a pile of red ants.

As he woke up, he thought about how to answer her question. There were practical concerns. The doctor needed to come up. There would need to be arrangements made with the pastor and the undertaker. Thank the Lord it wasn't the height of summer, but Clevis McCoy's mortal remains wouldn't stay fresh forever, and so they needed to get to work right away.

“Now, Miz McCoy? Once we deal with… everything, I'm taking you to your aunt in Colorado Springs. Your papa asked me to.”

She blinked. “No. This is my home. Why would I want to go to Colorado Springs? I don't know anyone there. I barely know my aunt.”

“Think,” he replied, trying to snap her out of her confusion with a harsh tone. “You're just a young girl. You can't stay here by yourself. Anything could happen to you. Without your father's income, what will you live on? Not to mention the danger!”

She said nothing. It struck him how incongruous her calmness seemed, especially after last night. The girl had just lost her father. Shouldn't she be sad? He regarded her closely. While there was a bruised, grieving look to her brown eyes, her chiseled face was set, stoic. She resembled her father more in that moment than she ever had before. There was a stillness about her, a sense of accepting her grief rather than fighting it. I wonder if that's something she learned from her mother. He recalled when Clevis had learned his wife, whom he called Daisy because he couldn't pronounce her Kiowa name, had died while the two of them were tracking a murderer through the mountains. It was the only time Jesse had ever seen Clev cry.

And now he's gone. The sandpaper feeling of Jesse's eyes turned to a familiar sting. Don't let go of it, Jesse. Hold yourself together. Clev wouldn't want that kind of tribute. Not to mention how embarrassing it would be to go all to pieces while the girl in front of him didn't.

Addie stared into his eyes and he blinked twice to clear his vision.

“How old are you?” he blurted suddenly. His cheeks began to burn at the rudeness of the question.

“Nineteen,” she replied succinctly, unembarrassed by his impertinence.

Now it was Jesse's turn to blink in disbelief. Nineteen? An adult? No wonder her dad was talking about her finding a husband. “Oh,” he said stupidly. Then, to cover his awkwardness, he stood and stretched, groaning again as his neck popped loudly. “Should we go down to town and see about finding the doctor and the minister?”

The abrupt question brought them back to the present and the awareness of their crushing grief. Just behind the curtain lay the body of a man they'd both cared for. A body that would need to be cleaned and buried, prayed over and finally left behind, with no one to visit his grave.

This time it was Addie whose eyes shone with tears. Her lip trembled. Jesse gripped her shoulder, trying to bring her a small measure of comfort. “You're not alone, Addie,” he mumbled.

She nodded, her breath catching on a deep inhalation before she stepped away from Jesse. “Do you want any breakfast?”

“No thanks,” he replied. “I'm not hungry. When you're ready, shall we head to town?”

She nodded. “I'm not hungry either.”

“Can you ride?” he asked, hoping Mercury would allow it. Normally the horse balked at anyone other than him on his back. “I don't have a sidesaddle.”

Addie froze and turned, staring at him, the full rosebud of her lower lip drooping slightly open. “Sidesaddle? Sacrilege. Do you honestly think either of my parents would ever have permitted me to use one?”

Jesse, who had just taken in a mouthful of coffee, swallowed quickly to avoid choking on it. Humor even now? What spirit this girl has.

He smiled sadly. Clev must have been so proud of her. No, that was wrong. Jesse was no longer clear on what he believed about anything, but he had no doubt that somewhere, right now, his friend was looking down at his daughter and smiling. “Point taken,” he said. “Get some shoes on and let's get moving.”

“I hate shoes,” Addie replied, but she consented to stick her feet into a pair of men's boots anyway. Or rather boy's boots, Jesse thought with amusement. No man ever had feet that small.

As Addie busied herself getting ready for the ride, Jesse opened every window he could find in the cabin. While the wind in the mountains blew much less intensely than in his prairie hometown, he hoped it would be enough to dispel any contagion lingering around the room. Then he proceeded to the lean-to which housed the McCoy family's ancient, swaybacked mule, their milk cow and half a dozen chickens. Wait, what happened to Stormy? Sure enough, Clev's gelding was nowhere to be seen. The stall in which Mercury stood should not have been empty. Must have gotten rid of him, once he got too sick to work.

A chilly breeze reminded Jesse of the inclement weather. The unhappy chickens clustered together in a patch of sunshine, their feathers fluffed. I wonder how they keep the birds warm in the winter… I wonder what will become of them.

He slipped Mercury's bridle into place and led him out of the makeshift stall where he'd spent the night. The gelding leveled a sour look at the sorry-looking structure and tossed his glistening mane. Shabby housing or not, Mercury had been well groomed. Jesse regarded the saddle. The trip into town—if the unincorporated collection of buildings around the Pagosa Hot Springs could be called a town—would take the best part of an hour on foot, which would be their only means of transportation since the old mule hardly looked able to meander across the meadow, let alone carry anyone. Though the sun shone brightly on the still-damp grass and pale green shoots that would someday become spring flowers, another chilly breeze ruffled Jesse's hair and shot straight through his shirt. He shivered.

The sound of dry grass crackling drew his attention to his left, where Addie approached, dressed in an oversized leather coat he'd seen many times. He looked askance at the girl, one blond eyebrow raised. She shrugged, making the heavy fabric creak, and turned to Mercury. The horse whickered a greeting, clearly having forgiven her for putting him in the hated barn. She approached without a hint of fear and stroked his velvety nose for a moment before circling around. Jesse turned to retrieve the saddle from the rear of the storage area which formed the right-hand side of the 'barn'. A sudden noise snared his attention and he turned, startled to find Addie sitting astride the barebacked horse, her legs hanging down over his flanks. Jesse's jaw dropped. “But… the saddle?”

She shrugged. It seemed to be her signature gesture. “That's the sissy way. I don't need it. Besides, it's not big enough for both of us.”

He blinked. “I thought I'd walk.”

“Walk? With this strong boy standing by?” She patted the horse's neck. “He can carry us both to town. Hop on, Mr. West.”

His formal name sounded wrong on her lips. Though he'd seen her a few times over the years, they'd never exactly known each other well enough to be friends, and yet…

“Call me Jesse,” he said gruffly as he vaulted onto the horse's back. Damn, this is hard without stirrups. Seizing the reigns, he turned the horse towards the township of Pagosa Springs.

“All right, Jesse,” Addie said, her voice so soft the breeze threatened to carry it away. With her body pressed close to his, he became far more aware of her warmth and the softness of her curves than he would really have liked. “I never much cared for the Miss and Mister business anyway. What purpose does it serve to create distance?”

This time Jesse shrugged. “It's just the way it's done, Addie.” After all, she'd just said, calling her Miz McCoy again made no sense.

“Not good enough. I like to know the reason for something before I do it.”

“There isn't always a reason, Addie, except to stay out of trouble,” he said patiently. She's still so young.

“People see me and automatically assume I'm trouble,” she replied. “At least if they knew my mother.”

“Are they right?” he asked, an impish smile playing around his mouth as his eyes scanned the horizon. Or at least what he could see before the view was interrupted by blue mountain peaks capped in white. Before them, pine trees crowded close, their fragrance perfuming the gentle breeze. This is so unlike Kansas. Something about the mountains and trees never failed to make Jesse feel unsettled. Growing up in the middle of an unending prairie, able to see the horizon in all directions, the wind constantly in his ears, all the obstructions made him feel closed in.

“You're tense. What's wrong?” the girl asked.

I'm not about to admit to her that mountains make me edgy. “I'm heading into a town I don't know, to meet with people I don't know to plan my best friend's funeral.”

“You don't need to,” she replied. “Dad made all the arrangements weeks ago. We only need to let the appropriate people know.”

Of course. That fits perfectly. Scared or not, Clev couldn't have faced death with anything less than the strength and preparedness with which he embraced life.

Addie's shoulders trembled. Poor girl. She's trying so hard to be strong, but she's basically alone in the world. Must be terrifying.

Her fear and loneliness resonated with Jesse. He knew exactly what she was feeling. As the gentle rhythm of the horse's hooves and the sweet scent of pine washed over them, some of their tension melted away.

“Do you know the first time I met your dad?” he asked.

She moved her head in a 'no' fashion.

“I was in jail.” Jesse chuckled at the memory.

“What did you do?” her voice, soft and curious, filtered back to him.

“I got drunk. Then I cheated at cards. Then I got in a fight. I thought they were going to string me up, but as hung-over as I was, it seemed like a pretty good idea. Your dad stepped in and pointed out that I hadn't taken anyone's money, and a couple of broken barstools was a pretty small crime to stretch a boy's neck for. I was just your age at the time.”

She didn't reply, but he knew she was listening. There was a sense of alertness in her silence.

“He bailed me out and convinced the owner of the bar I busted up to exchange a couple weeks' work for his troubles since I didn't have any money. Your dad stayed around to make sure I paid off my debts and then dragged me out of town and taught me how to do honest work.”

“He always was a hero,” she said, and Jesse detected a hint of irony in her voice.

“A hero to everyone else, huh?”

“Yes,” she replied, and then a little sob escaped. “Damn it.”

Jesse raised his eyebrows at the curse. “Not much of a lady, are you?”

She chuckled, though her breathing was far from steady. “No, not at all.”

“Good,” he replied. “Then I won't have to worry about offending you with my coarse, bounty hunter ways.”

She laughed again, a little more convincingly this time. “What do you think my dad was? I learned a lot from him when he was home. Jesse…” she broke off.

“What is it, Addie?”

“We're here talking and laughing about Dad. He… he passed yesterday. Is it wrong?”

Jesse thought about her question. “No,” he replied. “I don't think so. I mean, I knew him pretty well. I think he'd like that we're remembering him with laughter rather than tears.”

“Or at least only tears,” she added, wiping her eyes.