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Hey, Mr. In Denial (LBGT)

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Blurb

[BOOK #1 of Hey, Love Me Please]

What's the best way to torture yourself? Being around the person you're attracted to when you know that you don't even stand a teeny tiny chance with them. Being heartbroken once, Beau St. Clair can't afford to get his heart broken again by the newcomer of the school they go in. So as much as possible, he lets himself be cautious of his actions and such to avoid 'accidentally' falling in love with the guy.

With nothing dark but full of color past, Robert is not your usual typical straight jock. He's friendly and outgoing, and sometimes, full of himself. With his exes trying to reach him out, girls trying to get in his pants, and openly gays who like to have a taste of him, he's trying to keep everything in check and in place. Suddenly being a heartthrob of the school is taking its toll on him.

When their worlds collide, what will happen when the slightly broken guy meets the completely healed but hopeless guy that is Robert?

With the old characters recurring from the Mister series, and the new ones entering, their world will be a huge ball of mess. Probably bigger than a scandal itself.

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Chapter 1
Chapter 1 Being gay, I have been defined by the people around me. From when I discovered I was gay, up to this point, where I currently stand. People, even just in one glance, love to define people just by taking a look at what they wear. Sometimes they review and criticize people as if they are the ones expert at making everything good. That's not how it works yet people think that's how it works. They think they are the most superior. They think they know everything yet all they see is what you do. Even if you're doing something right, they'll try to see a hole and flaw and they'll discuss it with their narrow-minded friends when you turn your back. People are so religiously stupid. If we were born without a religion, would having a same-s*x partner still be a big issue? I think not. Religions tell us what to believe and what is right and what is wrong. I've been raised with a religion, too, but it doesn't come to the point where my parents would throw me just for being gay. My parents have known first way long before I discovered it myself. They have been so supportive of me that even in the times that I felt disgusted about myself, I was able to lift myself up. Of course being gay has its perks and cons. You get to drool to overly hot guys, with those hard abs and chiseled face and walking like a God across the street. The cons are dealing and being forced to meet and social with the homophobic and narrow-minded humans. It's called being social, and that's something you should do at school if you want to survive. I have been bullied as well. When I was a kid, a seven-year-old kid, I knew that there was something off with me, like I wasn't normal. But I brushed it off. I found myself staring at guys my age, and some were older than me. But I brushed it off. I thought it was just curiosity building up inside me. And then they noticed, the higher grades, and that's when the bullying started. Dealing with homophobia and narrow-minded people would make you a stronger person someday, and it did make me stronger. I knew how to fight, to use my fists and throw it at the enemy's face. I have been in Guidance Counselor several times, and people have really tried to fix my attitude, which I know there's nothing wrong. This is my way of protecting myself, and my parents know that well and they couldn't be prouder of me. My father taught me how to be a strong man, and how to defend myself and the others just in case. He's not like the any other fathers I see on the televisions, or on the books that I have read a hundred times. My father is much caring and protective of me, more so than a girl. I'm an only child, so that's the reason why they are so overprotective of me. But I'm not complaining, though. If I want a rock in my life, I could just walk up to them and tell them what my problems are. Secrets in this family are nothing but a story to tell. We're an open book. My mother has told me that several times. If people know everything about you, and they try to use your weaknesses against you, and when you know how to deflect and protect yourself even when your fears are surfacing, nobody would dare to destroy you. She also told me never to give up, and never shed a tear in a fight. Not only people who were diagnosed with cancer and the cancer survivors were a fighter, but even the LGBT community. To other people, they would prefer to have a cancer instead than being gay or being real. In that way, they would feel overwhelm of love and care instead of receiving hate and death threats. I have received love and care from the people I love, but that doesn't deny the fact that I've also received a hate and death threat messages, which I intend to keep in my 'ole brown mini box made of wood underneath my bed for forever. My friends know everything about me. Derek, my best bud from Russia who is also gay, and Gloss, who I fell in love with and tried to deceive when he lost his memory from a car crash are the reason why I go to school. When Gloss lost his memory, it's awful but I saw that as an opportunity to take him, to claim him as mine, which didn't really last long. His boyfriend, who is supposed to be his step-brother, is off at college and is probably having a time of his life in a college just near the school where my friends and I go in. He's basically the owner of the school. Gloss and Noah are inseparable. They talk all the time. They have probably used the communication apps that have been developed over the fast-like-a-lightning growing-technology. From f******k to Hangouts of Google, they have used it. Ever since Noah and his squad left the school, the teachers feel like they are the most powerful human beings in the world. They threat us by telling us they could ruin our lives with just the tip of their pens. Who they treat kindly is Gloss, since he's the boyfriend of the basically owner of the school. But I have already moved on from him and I don't deserve him in any way. Gloss has told me once that someone is waiting for me and that I just need to wait. People always give that advice to those people who crave for something they can't have as of the moment. I crave for love and care. Not from my parents but from someone who will love me until the end. I'm infatuated with someone, though. Ever since Gloss's best buds came into the school, my eyes are always trained to this one guy who likes to be so casual and cool. Though he's straight as hell, I can't help but to ogle and admire him whether I'm near him or from afar. With his messily brushed up blonde hair that could make anyone swoon, and his dark green eyes that could captivate your heart and soul, his firm and chiseled jaw with shaved hair that could take anyone's breath away, he's near perfect. He's like a walking God or Adonis in my sight whenever he passes me by, or walks in front of me and asks me questions and such. I'd find myself staring at his dark green eyes, and it's captivating my soul. Sometimes, he would make fun of me, tease me until I blush so hard but that's not the end. It's pretty obvious that I'm infatuated with him, but he can't sense anything. Sometimes I think he's too much of a dumb jock to even realize that some gay guy is liking him already. Leaving subtle hints, he doesn't get it when I make a joke about liking him. He would get this furrowed brows, or arched brows, in his face and his lips would pucker and you would clearly see that he's trying to make sense of the jokes but never once he gets anything. Perhaps it's a good thing that he doesn't get my jokes, because if he does, I don't know how he would react. He's friendly, outgoing, and funny. He's fun to be around with. It's, like, your day will never be completed if you didn't have his presence near you. He just has this effect on everyone that makes everyone laugh, and it's a good thing. Gloss, sometimes, sticks with him throughout the day when Noah doesn't answer his calls, which means sometimes I'm stuck with Kaila, Derek, Ashton, and Gloss' other friends. They are fun to be around with, but I prefer his comfort. Sometimes I'm wishing that I was Gloss so I could spend a lot of time with him, but it doesn't work that way. I have to earn his attention, and that's by sticking up with Gloss. Don't get me wrong, I love Gloss and Kaila and Derek and Ashton and the others, but this guy unknowingly wrapped me around his index finger. Since we're on our last year in this school, I'd make the most of it. If I have to take risks by dating other men, then I would do it without any hesitations. I can't just stay like this, infatuated with a straight guy and if I'm not careful, I might fall in love with him, which would completely suck since he's a very straight guy who doesn't want d***s and sausages and hotdogs. He prefers melons and other roundish stuff. He loves it. So if I fall in love with him, I'm totally screwed. My life would become a mess and I'm not sure if I'm going to be completed. I got broken once, never again in my life will I be broken again. Sighing, getting off of my bed, the sun is already rising high across the sky, and the clouds slowly move, calmly. I've already dressed up for school, and since today is Monday, which is the first day of school for the week, which sucks, I'm currently waiting for my driver, who by the way is Derek. Looking at the clock, it's already 7:40 in the morning. 20 minutes more before the school starts. Minutes have passed and I hear the honk of his Toyota Vios and I roll my eyes at him for being so cranky in the morning. Derek has always been like that. Straightening my polo and pants, I grab my backpack, leave the room, run downstairs, kiss my mom's cheek, and get outside. Derek is waving his hand at me. He has a toothy grin tugged on his lips and I roll my eyes, opening the passenger seat with force that makes him frown. He turns on the radio, hitting the volume at 17/20, and her voice comes right through the speakers, blasting. My best buddy nods his head as he pulls away from the driveway, handling the clutch and turning it on reverse. He then moves the clutch forward and drives across the road while singing. "It wasn't laahhhvv. It wasn't laahhvv." I turn around, inserting my two index fingers inside my ears to keep myself from hearing his horrible and awful singing. He nails the Perfect Illusion song so badly it hurts. If the singer and composer get to hear his rendition of the song, she would totally ban him from singing it. "You're making the song so horrible," I complain, giving him a side-eye, which he rolls his eyes for. "b***h, you ain't gonna tell me anything," he says, winking at me, his Russian accent thick. "It was a perfect illusioooon. Mistake for laahhvv. It wasn't laahhvvv." Sighing loudly, I place my palms on my ears, preventing his voice from invading my ears. But his voice is going straight to my head. The song is pretty great, but Derek is totally ruining the song and its meaning. When he sings it, it sounds like a dying, screeching cat. Just like on the movie Ju-On. Ever since Nero left a few months ago just to attend college, which most of the jocks go into, Derek has been listening to Lana Del Rey, Adele, Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, Marina and the Diamonds, and Melanie Martinez. I swear the poor guy's heart is breaking. Derek has burned a couple of their songs into one CD, and according to him, the collection is pure perfection with no flaws at all. He liked Ashton once, but his attention went from him to Nero, and he likes him best. But Nero doesn't reciprocate the feeling back, which makes my friend here slightly heartbroken. Sometimes I think why listening to those artists has got to do with the heartbreak. After a five minutes ride, the school comes into view and there (though I'm not surprised) are a lot of people still going inside, running as they think they're going to be late for their classes. There are a lot of new students here, and none of them captured my attention except Gloss' friend. Derek parks the car, choosing a slot near the exit of the gym since our last class for the day will be held in gym, which sucks since it's a physical education thing. I get out of the car, slinging my bag across my shoulder and shut the passenger seat's door and head off without waiting for my dumb-ass, slightly heartbroken friend. Derek runs after me. I see frowning when I look over my shoulder and I just give him a wink. We reach the main hallway of the school, and head to the Seniors Hallway to get things from my locker. My best friend pulls his locker key out of his pocket and inserts it into the keyhole, turning it around and opening his locker with a loud bang, which makes me shoot him an icy glare. His locker is just beside Nero's old locker when he was still here in this school. My best friend looks at Nero's old locker and just stares at it. I can practically see the gear working in his head, and I'm sure that he misses him badly. Though Nero, despite not liking my friend back just because he is 'heterosexual', has become a good friend of Derek. They were into same stuff, and they blended very well. After the graduation, Derek was supposed to get his number but Derek didn't have the balls to do so. He was kind of scared that Nero might make fun of him. There were What Ifs running inside his head, and it didn't stop, not until they got off the school and chose a course at college. I feel bad for my best friend, though. When we're alone, he'd say to me how much he regrets not asking Nero's number. Nero is a jerk, well, kind of a jerk, but he's fun to be around with. Unknowingly he made my best friend happy, but they left. It's not like they could control it. He and the others jocks had a good future ahead of them and they needed to make well-thought decisions in their lives. My eyes scan the area and land on one person: Robert Dale Waites. He's casually hanging with his friends and Gloss, who is talking on the phone, and I assume that he's talking to his boyfriend Noah. Robert, or Dale (I always call him Dale, because I think it's cute on him, and it makes me feel like I'm special for him), is resting his arm across his locker while leaning down, talking to a girl named Lilith. They are friends with Homer, Joey, Gloss, Ashton, and Tony. I roll my eyes at them, not wanting to see them flirt with each other. Apparently my best friend sees me, and he nudges my stomach while wiggling his eyebrows. I scoff, turning on my heels, not wanting to see them flirt in front of me. As though he feels my presence, Gloss calls out my name and I'm forced to turn around to greet them. I smile awkwardly, heading towards their direction, Derek trailing behind me. Ashton is engaged on a call and there's a blush creeping up his cheeks and I just know who he's talking to. Both Lilith and Dale stop flirting with each other to give me a look, and when Dale sees me, a grin makes its way to his lips and I just want to lick it off until he craves for me, which I know it's not going to happen. Never in a million years. Never in my life will that happen. Well, if I make him wasted, or drug his drink, then perhaps I could go all the way with him, but it would make me a very low person. That's not me. "John says hi to all of you," Ashton says, getting off the phone just for a while only to return back on the phone to talk to his boyfriend. Everyone says hi in chorus and Ashton turns around, walking further away from us so he can have a privacy. Gloss turns around, turning the screen of his phone off and putting his mobile into his pocket, opening his mouth only to shut it close. He looks at his friend Dale, and shuts him out due to him mumbling words to Lilith. Dale is not really a flirt, but he can be at times. And he chose the time now. "Are you going to do anything later after school?" "He's going to throw a pity party," Derek butts in, winking at me and everyone laughs, including Dale and Lilith. I whack the back of my best friend's head and he groans, shooting me a glare. "I'm not really doing anything later," I say, studying my fingers and sighing out loud, "but I think I'm going to drown myself in self-loathe and self-pity because yeah, this day sucks." "Someone woke on the wrong side of the bed," Lilith sings, winking at me and I resist the urge to roll my eyes at her. Lilith is a very good friend, and if I ever get mean to her, everyone would choose Lilith's side because, really, she's a great girl and all. She became everyone's fantasies when Chelsie, the super-hot and super-mean chick lady and the ex-girlfriend of Noah who hooked up with his best friend Mike who turned out to be gay as well and fell in love with the hottest cop ever and now they're together living in the same house with the cop's four-year-old son, left. Everyone chuckles and his chuckle tickles my eardrums, making my heart beat faster. Scoffing, I say, "We'll be late," Apparently Dale notices my tone, but he doesn't comment about it. He lets it slide, not speaking about my sudden change of mood. I turn on my heels and lift my arm to look at my watch, and it reads: 7:54 and when it exactly turns 8, the bell will ring, signaling the first class for today. Nearly everyone shares the same schedules, and I have six classes with Dale and the others, and seven classes with Derek. Derek runs after me, putting a hand on my shoulder and he looks at with pity, and I just shrug him off, not really wanting to talk about what happened. He knows that I got jealous, but it's never my right to be jealous. Perhaps I have the right because this is my body and thoughts, but I'm not allowed to express it to everyone or to anyone. "Beau, you really need to party," Derek suggests, putting his hand on my shoulder again and giving it a light squeeze. I look at him in the eyes. Partying never really excites me, but Derek has been telling me that it would take my mind off of anything, of Dale. He knows that I have developed an infatuation with Dale, but he never really comments about it. "This Friday, there's a party going on at Jerick's house, you know, the junior who is making a name in the industry of basketball at Sky International High School?" "Yeah, yeah, I know him," I brush him off, shooing him. Jerick Archangel is a junior who likes to play basketball. He just came into this school last year; he's a transferee. He's of Brazilian decent, mixed blood with Japanese. His mother tongue is Brazilian, and knows how to speak Japanese as well, but he speaks English very well and fluently. "But seriously, I don't need to party," "Dude, you seriously need to get laid," says Derek. "Like, seriously." I arch a brow at him, crossing my arms across my chest. We only have three minutes left before the bell rings. If we get late, Mrs. Zubiri would definitely lash out on us. "I don't need to get laid; I'm not desperate. That was before when I tried to manipulate Gloss' mind when he lost his memory, but it's different now. I've changed for the better." "Well, it's either you're coming with me, or you're coming with me," he says stubbornly, rolling his eyes at me. His childishness makes me have a headache in the morning and I groan out loud, turning around and pinching the bridge of my nose. "You need to at least have fun just a bit. No need to stress yourself out because it will just make you... um, depressed?" "Listen here, you Russian –" I say but get cut off when a hand wraps in my wrist and tugs me forward forcefully. Looking up, I see that the hand wrapped around my wrist belongs to the person I'm infatuated with. It belongs to Dale, who has a grin tugged on his lips. "What the hell?" "Sorry!" He shrieks, laughing. "One minute left and we're going to be late!" I take a glimpse of my watch and it reads: 7:59. I gasp and look over my shoulder, and Derek is running after us, chest heaving up and down rapidly and his eyes are trained on us. "Mrs. Zubiri will definitely kill us if we get late!" He turns left, then right, then just as the bell rings, Dale opens the door's room wide, the door banging on the wall with a loud that makes everyone stare at us in shock, even Mrs. Zubiri herself. "We're not late," Derek breathes out, leaning down and resting his hands on his knees, breathing loudly. "I wish you were," Mrs. Zubiri states, motioning over the empty seats. "Go on, take a seat." Actually, her calm demeanor scares us more. It's like she's planning something bad that will make us regret about deciding to go into this school. She turns around and begins writing today's topic on the board. She's actually an AP Lit and Comp professor, and her teaching kind of sucks. She will us do poetry, drama, write fictions, and other bullshit stuff through the semester and I swear I'm going to hate this subject. And yup, as predicted, as soon as the evil teacher moves aside and lets us see what she wrote on the board, everyone groans. Apparently what she wrote says: Drama, which means she will make us read about the Greek histories and such and other crappy history things and then what's worse is that, we're going to make a play about it. No, that's bullshit, I can literally predict the future that this will go downhill. I have too much drama on my life and I can't deal with another story drama that isn't mine for Pete's sake. As if sensing my misery, Derek and Dale snicker and I shoot them a glare, wanting to give them the bird. If Mrs. Zubiri weren't here in this classroom, I would have flipped them already and buried the bird in their faces. The evil teacher quiets everyone, stomping her foot on the ground and everyone stops muttering and stares at the evil lady in front of us. Burying my face in my table, I groan and that makes them snicker more, their shoulders shaking as they resist the urge to laugh. I ignore them as much as possible and decide to survive the day. Blocking his words from entering inside my head, I focus my attention on the evil teacher and lets her words pierce my brain. Though it's hurting my brain, I don't want the voice of the man beside me comes entering my head and starts messing with it. Perhaps Derek is right; I really need to get party this coming Friday with the strangers. But that is so cliché, I think. Going to a party just to distract myself. Resisting to laugh, I shake my head at myself and decide that Beau St. Clair will go to a party just to get over the infatuation he feels towards a straight guy, who will never reciprocate it back. Never in a million years. Never in my life. I think that's all I need in my life as of the moment. I need to have lots of fun, the one that I'm going to forget anything. Perhaps I could mingle with the other boys there. From what I've heard, Jerick has invited college guys and men from other schools. He's that friendly. So I could meet a man there, and we'd decide to exchange numbers, text all day and night, go on a date, and have fun. Perhaps the man in my life could be there at that party. Someone could be waiting for me there. Mrs. Zubiri discusses a few about the dramas we're going to make and our first homework be to read a poetry. Good as f**k; f**k them all. It's a good poetry of mine. Whether you admit or not, it's beautiful. The poetry I made in my head doesn't rhyme at all, but it could be at the top of the most romantic poetry in the world. An hour has passed and I realize that I've been listening to shits that the evil teacher spewed out. Once the bell rings, everyone picks up their things, ignoring the evil teacher that is shouting, telling us to calm down. They ignore her, shoving their things into their bags and flowing out of the room like a river. I wait for them before going out of the room. Derek walks beside me, with his bag slinging over his shoulder. "I decide that I'm going to the party that you've said," I say to him, which makes my best friend look at me like he has seen an angel. A grin tugs on his lips and he starts to wiggle his eyebrows and I roll my eyes at him. "Just want to let you know that I'm going there just because you're right. I do need to have fun, but I'm definitely not going to get laid." "That's no fun at all," he groans, but that doesn't stop him from grinning wickedly. Just by looking at him, looking not so suspicious, it makes me question his existence here on Earth. When I look at him, I know that he's planning something for me that would either put me in trouble or scar me for the rest of my life. As we walk across the hallway, I see Gloss on his locker, his phone over his ear, he has a smile plastered across his lips and Derek looks at Gloss. He chuckles, shaking his head. He pulls out a crumpled paper in his pocket and throws it at Gloss' direction. Gloss looks up, frowns, and flips Derek off and a smile breaks its way into his lips again. Yup, he's totally in love with Noah. "So it's set; we're going to the party." "Yes, we are." I lament, crossing my arms across my chest. "And please don't plan anything stupid for me. One that would not either cost me my life, or scar me for life, or put me in trouble. If you're planning on it already, I'm giving you now an advanced f**k you very much statement." My best friend just hums, walking away and disappearing when he gets into the crowded section of the hallway. I shake my head, sighing as I follow him suit.

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