All This Time

Noah's POV My father is killing me! He gave me an ultimatum to decide. I'm so stressed and the only girl aside from my mom who can make me calm is giving me too much guilt. I can't hurt her, but I need to choose.  It's been two weeks since we last saw each other. I ignored her texts and calls because I don't know what to say.  My phone rings and saw Sofia's name on the screen. I sighed heavily. I want to end this frustration I felt. I'm doing this for our future. I answered her call without saying anything. "Noah! Why didn't you answer my calls and messages? I miss you so much baby!" Sofia whined on the other line. I breath heavily. "I'm sorry. I've been busy this past few days." "So busy not to even bother to reply even one word telling me you're okay? I'm so worried about you." She asked silently almost a murmur. I want to sooth her and hug her tight.  I don't want to do this but I have to. This is also for her. "Can we meet later?" I asked. "Of course baby. I miss you so much. Are you sure you're okay to drive here?" She asked. "Of course. We need to talk. I'll text you where we could meet." I answered. "Okay baby. I'll wait for you. Bye. I love you." she said and wait for me to answer. "I love you too. See you later. Bye." I sighed and headed to shower.   ________________♥________________   When I am near her dorm, I saw Sofia waiting outside. She smiled and waved at me. I parked my car on the side and went out of the car. I was not out yet when Sofia crushed into me kissing my whole face. "I missed you!" She said and giggled, hugged me to her. I sat again, and she straddled me. I hugged her back tightly. I will miss her so much. We kissed for a while. I think I can't do this. I want to be with her always. But thinking about our future I need to do this right. We stopped, and she led me inside her dorm. I gave her a bouquet of flowers. "Thanks." "My roommate went out so I am alone and bored that's why I called you. Stay here I'll get you something to drink." She kissed me and head to the kitchen.  She went back with a bottle of beer for me and soda for her and two slices of blueberry cheesecake.    She sat beside me and we started eating the cake. She holds her hand with a forkful of cheesecake to me. I opened my mouth and ate it. She smiled and took some.  "So, what are we going to talk about? By the way how was school?" She asked between chewing her food. I swallowed and drink my bear. I put them back on the table. I looked at her straight to her eyes. I cleared my throat and sighed heavily. Can I do this? "Why, what's wrong baby?" She asked looking at me worriedly. "I want you to know that I love you so much. Always remember that okay?" She nodded confused. "I know, and I love you too. What is the problem Noah? Why are you so nervous and you looked so restless? Did something bad happened?" Sofia asked worriedly. "Dad happened. Everything is wrong. So, I want to ask you to understand." I paused and look into her eyes. "I am setting you free and I want you to fulfill all your dreams without me. Maybe it's not the right time for us. But I promise I'll come back to you. I love you, but I need to di this Sofia." I said sadly. "What?! No! Are you kidding me? Please Noah tell me you're joking!" she laughed like crazy. I held her face with my both hands. She stopped laughing and looked me in the eyes. "Listen Sofia, this is the right thing to do." "Why? Give me a valid reason. Why do we need to end this beautiful thing between us? Tell me!" She said sobbing and I felt bad for making her cry. All this time, during our relationship, my major goal is to make her happy always and I avoided making her cry during our time together. "I'm sorry I can't tell you right now. Please try to understand." I stood up without looking at her. It's too painful to look at her. I can't stand looking at her crying. Sofia hugged me tight from behind. "Please Noah, I can't. I can't do this. I can't live without you. I love you so much. Please don't do this to me!" She cried hysterically, never letting me go. I closed my eyes and heave a sigh. I untangled her arms around me. "No! No no no no!" She shouted. She kissed me wantonly and started to open my shirt buttons. "Sofia please don't make this hard for me." I pleaded. She started removing her dress, next her bra and her panties. She stood in front of me naked. She hugged me to her body and started to unbuckle my belt while kissing me torridly. "Sofia please." I pleaded but starting to kiss her back. She takes that as a signal and now I am naked too. She led me to her bedroom, we're both naked. "Please Noah for the last time make me love you to show you how much I love you more than anything hmmm?" She said pushing me into the bed. She straddled me and started kissing my eyes, nose, cheeks and lips. She went down still kissing me, worshiping my whole body. I couldn't control it anymore. We made passionate love as if this is the last time. Maybe it is. We made love make the most out of it. After our passionate love Sofia lay on top of me and kissed my chest. "I love you Noah. Please change your mind. I'll do anything you want but please don't leave me. Do you want to elope with me? I can do that for you. I can go anywhere if you're here beside me. Please?" she's starting to cry again. I kept silent and hugged her tight to me. We stay like this like forever. I saw a bedside clock indicating its time for me to leave. I put her beside me and stood up. Sofia hugged me from my back. "Noah please. I can't live without you. I just can't. Please don't do this to me." she said pleadingly still crying. I released her arms to me and started to get my clothes from the living room. She followed me while wearing a robe. I get myself clothed not looking at her. I just can't look at her right now. I need to do this for our future. "I'm leaving. Please Sofia, do everything you planned. I hope you'll reach your goal someday and have your own clothing company as you like. Good luck." I said and left the room.  I can see it from the corner of my eyes. She sat on the couch and put her head on her knees, crying like a baby. My heart cried too. This is for us baby girl.  "I love you so much baby girl. I hope I am not too late when I am ready to fight for our love. Wait for me Sofia." I murmured to myself. I drove back to Boston with a heavy heart. While driving I didn't notice, my tears are falling uncontrollably.