King of Anything

This all started with my best friend's body in the back of my car and the man I loved in the gutter.  I roamed the lone desert road, thinking to myself, I'd gone crazy. I guess I had. I'd lost my mind, it I didn't mind too much. Where had I left it? Who the hell knows? I'm going to jail now. Future's gone now. f*****g done now. They'd fund the bodies. Here's first. They'd hunt me down. Life's over now. All of this for revenge. I got it, so there's that. Don't have nothing left now. Sick now. What now? Now I wait. I walk this street, no one goes down, chewing some gum, waiting for my judgement. I've lost everything. Nothing left now. No purpose now. They'll find her soon. In the back of my car. Blue. She's blue now. Blue is how I felt when she betrayed me. When they betrayed me. I'm nothing but a killer now. Nothing left of me now. Sick now. My mind is on loop. I keep hearing their screams. I chuckle. They screamed so loudly. Life is a b***h, ain't it. I chuckle, listing to the .usic in my head, feeling out if my f*****g mind, and in my element in the same motion. I thought I'd feel different, but not really. Yesterday, I wasn't a killer. Today I am. Nothing's different but the sickness. Not at what I'd done. They deserved it. And more. If I could do more, I would. "I'm Queen of the f*****g world!" I screamed to no one, laughing, eyes closed to the sun. It's how I felt. I'm a f*****g Queen. f**k em. I like their screams. Maybe this is who I'm meant to be. The Queen with a crown no one else can see on a lonely desert road. I don't mind. Don't mind at all. I like the silence. Almost as much as the screams. They did this. They did this to get what I have. I have nothing now. And neither do they. The sun stings my eyes, as I stumble along the road, endless. I'd rather be alone. That's how this works, I don't mind. I don't mind. They all disappoint me. I am beautiful. Tragic. A f*****g Queen! I'm so lost. Am I happy? No. Absolutely not. And it only gets worse by the second. Where the hell is the police. I'm waiting for my bracelets. They'll be so pretty. I look adorable in orange, I mean it. Where the hell did my mind go? I want a f*****g drink. I want something that tastes like the bitter regret I can't even muster. What the hell am I? I don't regret it. I think I want to. I think I should. But I don't. I don't regret it. I'd do again. What does that make me? A queen? I think so. If only... If only I'd ran away when I felt it. I knew it bullshit, and I bought it. Was nothing else on the shelf I guess. Blinded myself, let this happen. I had big dreams once. I had...aspirations. What were they? Doesn't matter now. No one ever really falls in love with me. Not my parents. Not my grandparents. Why the hell would some regalar guy do the impossible? Maybe they all knew. What lurked inside. Maybe they saw this coming. I chuckle. Well, aren't they fortunate? Where are the police? Maybe they don't want me either. Oh well. They'll miss me eventually. I don't know how long I wander, down that never-ending road. A monster alone with her thoughts and the blood on her hands. The sun goes down, and I keep walking, my knees weak, throat on fire, mouth dry. That's when a lone car comes down the road. And stops right in front of me. Someone gets out, a man, tall, shrouded in darkness. He approaches me, just him, calmly, his strides even. I stop, and wait. Will he kill me? Is he the police? His car isn't a police car. He doesn't even seem like a police officer. "What are you doing here, alone?" I stare at him, unable to discern his features in the dark. "Answer me," He repeats lowly. "What are you doing here?" "Waiting to die," I whisper nonchalantly. He comes closer. "I can smell the blood on you." I don't look down. I wore white for a reason. "Did you kill someone, little girl?" I shrug. "I'm a Queen." He comes closer, until an arms wideth apart. "Well, I'm a King." I look up at him through half-lids "Of what?" He extends his hand. "Come with me, and see." I look at the big hand outstretched. I look up at him. His head is c****d, waiting. I raise my own hand, placing it in his. f**k it. "Excellent choice," He whispers, tightening his rough grip, pulling me toward the car. He'll probably kill me. That's what's going to happen here. He opens the door, letting my hand slip from his. "Please," He purrs, extending his hand toward the seat. That hand. That hand is going be my demise. I sit, marching to my death like the Queen I was. I catch a glimpse of him, in the cars light. His hair is Raven black. There's a scar running down his left eye, it's light blue. His right eye, I can't see the color. He vanishes from the light, appearing at the driver's seat. He gets in, putting the car in drive. He drives away, as I stare ahead, saying nothing. He's going to kill me. Neither of us speak as we drive the lonely road two strangers. Where's my mind, I wonder? I glance at the steering wheel. Maybe it's in that hand.