Broken Bones

For the last couple of months I'd wake up on able to use my body, I just laid there for a bit. On the thirty minute mark I'd be up and about pretty strange you would think. All the questions and wary thoughts are getting to me I should make a move today. That's strange, no morning disturbances from mom or Hana. I made my way down to dinner table ready for breakfast, still by myself I thought. It must be very late in the morning, how long was I out. Mom usually wakes me up before work, sheryl also leaves early now she works at the community college. But it's a Saturday, so where could they have being of too. It was 10:23 am and I was done with the dishes getting ready to head back to bed when I heard the door bell. It could only be one jobless person like myself. "Hey man, open up" Tim yelled while ring the doorbell consistently. He's a mad man and I liked to keep him out there a while "Yo what's up man, I got an ounce on me you in" Tim said, now laying on the couch "An ounce, brother who are Escobar" I replied "we can't be having that s**t in here yo" "Well I bring you the best and you insult me" tim muttered "He hates me, he hates me" Hate, no I could I could truly call him a brother. He graduated two years back i don't know why he still hanged around me. We'd smoke a little weed from time to time, I never let myself get to carried away. We prepared a roll in the fanciest manner, all set to heat it up. In came hana "Hey, what are you two nerds doing" Hana said "Is that pot" "Noooooo, no no" I replied laughing nervously "Hey Hana, how you doing?" Tim muttered to Hana "No, plus aren't you like a billion years older than rob, i don't get it" she replied simultaneously What's there to get most my school mates where duds, or I would say, it was mutual with Tim i guess. I am sort of what a the called a weirdo. "I don't care, I'm in my room stay out!" Hana said I watched Hana slam her door, the echo bouncing off the walls. Tim stretched on the couch like he owned the place. "Man, she's harsh," he said, rubbing his eyes. "Why you even care?" "I don't," I muttered, though my stomach twisted. I did care. Always had. But that didn't mean I had to show it. Tim grabbed the half-rolled joint from the table. "Fine. More for me." He flicked it in the air, catching it like he was some kind of magician. I shook my head. "Nah, man. Not today. I gotta... think." Tim scoffed. "Think? Bro, it's Saturday. Thinkin' won't make your life better." I stared at him, half-laughing, half-annoyed. Maybe he was right. Maybe that's what scared me — doing nothing, letting the day slip away while everyone else moved forward. I glanced at the clock. 10:45. Too late to go back to bed. Mom and Sheryl were gone. Hana locked herself away. And Tim... well, he'd be stuck here until someone told him to leave. I made a move toward the door, just to step outside. The sunlight hit my face, warm and sharp. For the first time in weeks, I felt awake — really awake. "Yo, you leaving me?" Tim shouted. "Yeah, man. Gotta get my head straight," I said. Tim threw his hands up. "Hey, how about this party at Annette's house think about it" "She just broke up with angstrom, I don't know what kind of name that is but this is your chance, man" I paused at the door, my hand still on the knob. "A party?" I repeated. "Yeah," Tim said, sitting up now, suddenly serious. "Not some lame kickback. Real people. Music. Seniors, some college kids. Annette's going through it. Perfect timing." "Perfect timing for what?" "For you to stop acting like a retired old man at nineteen." I rolled my eyes. "I'm not—" "You are," he cut in. "You wake up weird every day, you overthink everything, and you disappear into your room like you're hiding from life. Go to the party." The words hit harder than I expected. I hated that he wasn't completely wrong. Annette. I barely knew her. She'd been in two of my classes junior year. Loud laugh. Smelled like coconut lotion. Dated that dude Angstrom—yeah, weird name—who wore leather jackets in ninety-degree weather like he was in some music video. "Why would she even want me there?" I asked. Tim grinned. "Because you're mysterious." "I'm not mysterious." "You don't talk. That counts." I stepped fully outside now, the door half-open behind me. The street was quiet, but my chest wasn't. It felt tight again, like those mornings when I couldn't move. Only this time, I could move. I just didn't know where. A party meant people. Noise. Conversations I'd replay later in my head, wondering if I sounded stupid. It meant seeing classmates who probably still thought I was the quiet weird kid who wrote in the back of class. It also meant not spending another Saturday pretending I wasn't scared of everything. "You don't have to stay long," Tim added, softer now. "Just show up. That's half the battle." Show up. Such a simple thing. But for me, it felt like jumping off a roof and hoping I'd grow wings on the way down. "What time?" I asked. Tim's grin stretched wide. "Eight. I'll pick you up at seven-thirty. Wear something that doesn't scream 'I read philosophy alone.'" "I don't read philosophy." "Exactly. Then surprise them." I almost laughed. Almost. From inside the house, I heard Hana's music start blasting through the wall. Some loud pop song about freedom or whatever. The irony wasn't lost on me. Freedom. Maybe that's what this was. Not the party. Not Annette. Just... choosing something different for once. "Fine," I said. "I'll go." Tim jumped up like we'd just won the lottery. "That's what I'm talking about!" He clapped my shoulder on his way out. "Seven-thirty. Don't chicken out." When he finally left, the house felt quiet again. Too quiet. I looked at my reflection in the hallway mirror. Same face. Same messy hair. Same guy who couldn't move some mornings, stuck between sleep and reality like his body didn't trust him to get up. But tonight, maybe I wouldn't wait thirty minutes. Maybe I'd move the second I felt afraid. And that scared me more than the paralysis ever did.