Chapter seven: A face of rebellion
1841 Words
> I am being foolish again but I really would like to know you more. Are you up for a very childish SMS chat with a stranger? -her phone suddenly buzzed while she was in a deep state of trying to understand single Korean words out of a restaurant chatter surrounding her.
> 시도하자, 낯선 사람
> Nice one, I see you managed to recover after I destroyed your handbooks.
> They look like blood, sweat and tears they actually are for me. And pain. A lot of it.
> Don’t hurt yourself with Korean. You haven’t even made it to polite speech.
> Thank you for being really motivating, Stranger.
> At your service, Anna.
> Do you have a name I can call you or is it Stranger that you prefer.
> I’d rather be a stranger, it’s more mysterious.
> Suit yourself. I failed then by giving you my name.
> I’ll give you a real one too. But not many people know it.
> I won’t tell anyone. Is it embarrassing?
> Like what?
> Like your name means something ridiculous like a potato or something?
> You have a crazy imagination.
> So is it potato?
> It’s handsome/talented.
> Damn, that’s an embarrassing name.
> It is right?
> But you are pretty handsome for a high-schooler.
> You know I’m older right?
> How would I know that. I don’t even know your name.
> It’s Jun.
> Just? I noticed that most Korean names have two syllables.
> I'm special. And it’s just Jun. And I’m 24.
> Right, 24.
> I’m not kidding now.
> You look younger. Especially for an old lady like me.
> You don’t look old.
> Well, I feel old. I was already experimenting with painting my nails pink when you were born.
> Pink is a nice choice.
> Yeah, especially if you are a fan of Britney Spears.
> No way.
> Yeah, not my proudest moments, but I looked cute in ponytails.
> I bet you did, Anna.
> Jun, can I ask you a question?
> Go ahead, as long as it’s not about my first nail paint. That will have to remain a secret.
> No way you painted your nails.
> I still do.
> [a picture of really delicate hands with a perfect manicure]
> I’m scared of Korean beauty routines.
> No need, we can’t hurt you because that would hurt our manicure.
> Smartass.
> I have my moments. So what was the question?
> Why did you write to me yesterday?
> I just felt like it.
> Just like that? You are a strange boy with a perfect manicure.
> I’m even stranger than that.
> Should I be scared?
> Not today, I need to keep some of my secrets.
> Please do. My ego may not survive if your makeup skills are also better than mine.
> Ok, won’t say anything more.
He sent the last message and looked in the mirror. On the perfect face drawn on his face for the commercial shoot that was about to begin in a moment. A bitter smirk escaped his mouth.
> If only she could see me now.
He suddenly felt an unfamiliar feeling in his stomach. A combination of excitement and dread. As if he wanted her to see him now looking like a dream of every teenage girl but at the same time dreaded that she wouldn’t be amazed by that but disgusted.
Why would anyone be disgusted by perfection- he thought.
Because it’s just a shell. You are a shell. A small voice inside his head whispered. You are empty and can do nothing more than being dancing and singing doll.
Jun graduated last year. He had a degree financed by the company. They said it would look good that he is not only into entertainment but he’s smart too. And it would be true if at least part of his time would be really spent at the university. But it was all just a set-up. He had some private tutors preparing him for exams but being as tired as he was with all his idol duties everything he learnt disappeared from his brain the moment it entered it. So as a business major he knew nothing about business other than how to make money for others.
On the other hand, Anna must have been well educated. He sensed it, she had that unnatural American accent that only the foreigners studying in the US got. He knew it too well. He wondered where she was from and what brought her to Korea. She wore expensive clothes and didn’t wear a ring so she most likely earned it on her own. Plus she walked to him in around 10 minutes which meant that she lived nearby. And that meant a fortune worth housing.
He suddenly felt like a shy boy from a lower middle-class family in a small town entering a kpop business again. As if he wasn’t good enough. As if his carefully-built facade started crumbling and showing the emptiness it covered.
At the same time Anna was nervously spinning her phone on the desk while listening to a broken English explanation of a young employee trying to propose a solution to a problem she was tasked to solve a long time ago. She was in pain and so was Anna trying to suppress her growing frustration at the girl who not only showed no signs of creativity but also was visibly limited by her language skills. I asked for an English speaking assistant she later complained to an HR team leader responsible for staffing. She got the best person possible for the job.- she tried to defend herself.
The girl barely can express her basic needs in English, let alone do some creative work. Find someone more suitable, even if you were to recruit someone for twice her salary. I need an assistant that is not afraid of me and can express herself in English. That’s all I require. It’s not that much. - she said and left.
Not that much huh - murmured the HR Leader who trembled every time she saw a message from Anna in her inbox. The lady is a walking dagger.
After this conversation, Anna took her coat and left the office. It was already 5 pm but the open space was full of people. All of the deadly surprised by the sight of her leaving that early. Something must have happened and we will suffer from that - said the chubby sales guy right after she closed the door. - but at least we get to see an early evening, laters everyone.
She stormed out of the office and walked towards the only spot she wanted to find herself in at that moment. The pin. The small bench he was sitting on when they met. It felt like the most peaceful place on the planet back then and she really hoped it would be the same now. But it wasn’t. She forgot that it wasn’t 4 am anymore and the park would be full of couples roaming around and the warm afternoon would attract families. So she just walked ahead. She suddenly felt really uncomfortable. Right, it was the work high heel shoes. And of course, she had no backup. And she was already quite far away from home and pretty far away from any spot she could catch a taxi.
Angry at herself she laughed louder than she thought. What a fool to walk here.
She snapped a picture and sent it to him.
> The bench looks way worse than at 4 am.
There was no reply. She hid her phone and walked clumsily ahead to catch a taxi.
A few hours later he was finally done with the photo shoot. Worn out after posing and smiling he took off the painted mask from his face and changed clothes.
> I was a good boy today. Please grant me some time off. I’ll be back by 10 pm. - he said to the manager after leaving the dressing room.
> Don’t cause trouble. We have a US trip in 2 months. Can’t risk anything by then.
> I won’t. Just need some time off.
> Where?
> I don’t know. To the park, to solitude? Anywhere but not here.
Manager sighed. - Go but be an adult.
And that’s when he saw a picture sent 3 hours earlier.
> You’re not there anymore, aren’t you?
> Too late.
and she sent a picture of her feet in perfectly cosy socks on a really comfortable looking couch.
> This looks even better than the bench at 4 am.
> Don’t flirt with me when I’m wearing grandma socks.
> I don’t flirt with anyone.
She felt she went too far. She didn’t know how to reply to that. And he didn’t write again.
She sipped some wine.
And so it is me, a queen of miserable human interactions.
After a while, the phone buzzed.
> Are you still scared that I’m a psycho killer?
> I never was in the first place.
> And you still aren’t?
> Hmmm I’m getting anxious because of those questions.
> That’s pretty bad. I will shut up then.
> What was the next question supposed to be?
> Can I crash into your house?
> …..
> Sorry I know I went too far.
> You kind of did.
> Sorry, have a nice evening.
A long pause.
She will not talk to me again after that for sure.
Am I really that desperate?
> Google pin. Do you have a car?
> Not at the moment.
> Too bad. You will have to cross Mr. Park at the reception. And he will have questions.
> Damn.
> Let me know when you’re here, I will let you in through the garage.
> I’m almost here.
> You’re kidding, right?
> Nope, I guess that’s fate.
> Or stalking. I’m pretty scared now.
> Don’t be, I’ll bring something tasty.
It’s a given. She will probably lose her mind soon. Or already did. She quickly tried to change her clothes into something less grandma looking. He is gorgeous and 24. And I’m 31 and definitely could use a bath and a facemask now.
But I’m not on a date with the guy. I shouldn’t care.
Buzz.
> I’m here.
> Wait at the garage entrance.
When she opened the back door to the garage she saw the same boy she saw at the cafe. The same empty eyes but with a hint of joy today. The only thing was that he wasn’t wearing a hoodie anymore but a leather jacket and tight-fitting black jeans. And a cap. He looked like a celebrity trying to avoid being recognized.
And she was in a hoodie. And yoga pants. And still wearing those stupid socks.
- Writer
