The Outsider Series: The Complete Omnibus Collection

Chapter 30-1

Chapter Thirty

It had been three weeks and two days since she’d last seen Brad—since she moved out of his house. This was Bob’s weekend with Katy, and for the first time since moving; Emily was at a loss as to what to do. So, she cleaned the house, top to bottom, then wandered to the store to grab dinner and rent a movie.

Emily wandered the junk food aisle. Forget dinner; she needed snacks, chips and dip to go with her movie. She stuffed not one, but two bags of the extra salty ripple chips into her basket. She whipped around the corner positive she had all she needed to assemble a tasty dip. Looking down in the basket instead of straight ahead, she was nearly knocked over. Emily stepped back and wondered to herself whether she’d gasped when she gazed into his soft brown eyes. Of course, her stomach started doing all kinds of acrobatic flips. So, no, her desire for him hadn’t dimmed in the least. He looked fantastic in his snug Levis, buttoned-up plaid shirt, and faded jean jacket. He wore his black cowboy hat; the one she loved, and he practically lived in.

Trevor, her lost little boy, clung to his daddy’s hand, chomping on crackers from the open box in Brad’s other hand.

“Hi. How are you?” How pitiful was that? She couldn’t pretend he meant nothing. So she dropped her eyes as her cheeks heated; she was positive her face was blood red.

“I’m fine, Em. How are you?” She darted a shy glance at Brad and didn’t miss the sorrow that seemed to dim the light in his eyes. He seemed older, too. His handsome face seemed deeply marked with heavy lines and shadows. Even the gray dotting his hair seemed heavier.

Emily wanted to jump up and down. How could she be excited and devastated at the same time? “Brad, I… I…”

Brad stuffed the open box of crackers in the rack with the bottled water freeing his hand. He squeezed her shoulder and stepped closer. “Really, Em, I need to know how you are. Is everything okay?”

He didn’t look away. In fact, the way he watched her, she’d swear he really cared. “I’m fine.” Her voice trembled and she took a breath. “I have a job. I’m working at the gardening store at the edge of town.”

“That’s the one Taylor Banter owns, right?”

“Yeah. He’s a very nice man.”

“I’m glad to hear it. So how do you like working there?”

She glanced away and then back at Brad. “I like it. But then, I like plants and everything to do with dirt and growing things. I thought you knew I was there—after Crystal dropped in. Oh, and congratulations; she told me you’re planning on renewing your wedding vows.” She tried to sound happy for him, she really did, but she ached so bad, the bitterness made her sound like a spiteful old hag. She never could play politics. “Sorry…” She forced a smile that strained her face and then gazed down at Trevor—a little boy she still thought of as hers. He wouldn’t look at her because he was out of crackers and the box was out of reach, he began his “whoop whoop” rocking back and forth. He was no better. Didn’t Brad see that? When she looked back up, Emily needed to step back by the wildness that appeared to seethe from every part of him.

“You saw Crystal. When?” His voice was a little loud; some shoppers turned their heads, stopped and gawked.

“A week ago—you didn’t know?”

“No. And where ever would you get the idea I’m renewing vows with Crystal?”

“So, you’re not renewing your vows?”

He turned his head while he let go of a string of curses under his breath. An elderly lady turned her cart around and went the other way.

“I guess that was for my benefit.”

It was natural to touch his arm. “Do you have time for coffee?” She put herself out there, hoping he wouldn’t turn her down.

“Sure, there’s a coffee house next door.”

“Let me pay for this and we’ll go.” Emily lifted her basket of snacks, and then waved at his open box of crackers. “Are you going to pay for that?”

“Ah, yes, thanks for reminding me.” He reached for the box and followed Emily to the checkout. He sat his box in with her groceries and paid for everything. She tried to refuse, but he wouldn’t listen, as he handed cash to the cashier.

The overweight, dark-haired cashier looked at Emily and then Brad. “I think I’d listen to him; he’s bigger than you are. And listen, honey, if a man wants to pay for your groceries, let him. I wish one would pay for mine.”

An older guy, all gray and hunched, standing in line behind Brad, also piped in. “She’s right, just let him pay.”

Emily closed her mouth, frowned, and glanced at Brad who appeared to beam from the backup. Emily lifted her bag of groceries and marched out the door; Brad and Trevor right behind her.

Next door was a small coffee shop. Brad held the door for Emily. She grabbed a booth and placed her grocery bag on the floor. Brad scooted in with Trevor across from Emily. The only other customers, in this eight-table coffee shop, were an elderly couple chatting at a small round table across the room.

A middle-aged waitress appeared with two menus and a coloring book and crayons for Trevor.

“What can I get you?”

“You want coffee, Em?”

“Sure.”

“Two coffees, one cream and sugar; black for Emily and an apple juice for my boy.”

The waitress had a brilliant white teeth smile. She used her finger to flick her dark bangs back, which were a little on the long side. “Do you need a few minutes to look over the menu?”

“No, nothing to eat for me. Em?”

Emily handed her menu back to the waitress. “Just coffee, thanks.”

The lady frowned but took both menus and scooted away.

Brad reached in his grocery bag and pulled out a handful of crackers for Trevor, and piled them on a paper napkin. Trevor saw only the crackers, and one by one shoved them in his mouth and chewed as he lined up the sugar bowl, individual creamers, and then stacked them one by one, over and over.

Emily slid the coloring book and crayons in front of her before Trevor decided to eat the crayons.

Brad leaned on the table. “Em, Crystal and I have not reconciled; we’re not renewing our vows. I don’t know why she would have told you that. Actually, that’s not true. I do know why.” His eyes suddenly fixed with a sadness resembling hers.

Her stomach twisted up in knots; she hoped he ached too. She reached across the table and touched his hand. Her hand trembled and she yanked it back.

“You know, I made a mistake and I kick myself every day. I should have settled things with her when she left, but, instead, I did nothing. And you know what it got me? Her word against mine, and frankly, right now; she has me by the balls.” Brad leaned back and tapped his hand on the table. The waitress arrived with their coffee and Trevor’s juice.

“Thank you.”

She only nodded as she walked away.

Brad ripped off the paper surrounding the straw and dunked it in Trevor’s apple juice.

Emily studied the man. What was he talking about?

His face flushed. “Sorry, Em, I didn’t mean to be so graphic.” He waved his hand for her to forget it and slurped his coffee. “You don’t need this crap; you have your own struggles. I feel pretty low about how you got dragged into the middle of this s**t, her s**t, and how she treated you and Katy.”

Her ears were ringing and the room didn’t quite look right. She sucked in a deep breath, and then another. She opened her mouth to speak, but she couldn’t think of anything to say. So she closed her mouth. He then reached for her hand as something similar to worry transformed those hard brown eyes.

Emily snatched her hand back. “Brad, you need to stop. I don’t understand. What the hell are you talking about? How does she have you by the balls? What’s going on? No more games. I swear to God; I feel as if you two crammed me into a shooting gallery, at a carnival, and I’m the target.”

Gobs of blue dripped out of Trevor’s mouth. He’d found a crayon and was now chewing the paper off along with bits of the crayon. Emily reached across the table. “Trevor, no—spit it out.”

Brad jammed his fingers into Trevor’s mouth and pulled out what was left of the blue crayon then used a napkin to wipe his face. Emily made sure, this time, she’d confiscated all the crayons. Trevor whined and reached for the crayons which, of course, he wanted back. “Brad, more crackers.” Emily wiped the bits of crayon and spit off the table as Brad dumped a pile of crackers in front of Trevor. “Here give me that.” Emily took the soiled napkins and dumped them in the garbage by the door.

She felt grounded when she slid back in her seat. Trevor ate his crackers and swung his legs knocking the bottom of the booth, thud, thud. They’d better hurry. His crackers were almost gone.

Brad tapped his hand on the back of the booth. His face colored. “I never should have let her back in. That was my mistake. Since I never filed for legal separation or abandonment of Trevor—full custody...” He threw his hands in the air and leaned back. “Let’s just say; she’s one smart B…” He almost said it but caught himself before the vulgar word slipped.

He glanced over at the waitress who raised her eyebrows from where she lingered behind the cappuccino machine. “She’d seen a lawyer and had a plan in place before she ever walked back into my house. She knew exactly what to say and do. I screwed up. And I can’t force her to leave. I’m the one that has to leave if I want a separation. And I can’t take Trevor. She said I threatened and abused her and threw her out after Trevor was born; that she suffered from depression, didn’t know her rights. Now, she’s back because Trevor’s autistic. She’s threatening to take him because this therapy is abusive. She believes because he was born this way, he is to live this way. He needs to be respected for who he is. She’s even gone so far as putting him on a waiting list for an institution in California, specializing in autistic children. She’s using Trevor; for what reason, I don’t know yet. But I can’t, no I won’t, let her do that to my little boy.” His eyes filled with tears as he placed his hand protectively on top of Trevor’s head.

Emily wanted to leap up, race out to the ranch and give the woman a tongue lashing. “What do you mean she’s threatened to take Trevor? She can’t handle him. An institution, what the hell… She can’t do that!” Emily slammed both hands on the table.

Brad grabbed her arms, jerked her forward. The man and woman across the room watched and whispered behind their hands. “Calm down, Em. I won’t let her get away with it.”

Emily lowered her voice, shooting a meaningful glance at Trevor. “I’m sorry, Brad, but what the hell does she think she’s doing? She hasn’t spent any time with him. She avoids him. Her body language alone screams out how uncomfortable she is around him. She doesn’t know him; she can’t stand to be in the same room with him and he picks up on that.”

“She can’t fake motherly concern. He won’t respond to her. She freaks him out. I don’t understand why anyone would stoop that low. She’s his mother; doesn’t she want what’s best for him?” Emily couldn’t hold back the venom. She tried—she really did. She’d always tried to give everyone the benefit of the doubt; hadn’t she? But this was too much. Trevor wasn’t hers. But she wanted him to be.

“Em, you’re right, but I need to think of Trevor. I already got raked over the coals by my lawyer. I need to listen to him. Follow what he says to win this and get her out of my life.”

Understanding what really happened didn’t make the hurt any less. How long had the woman planned to drive a wedge between her and Brad? It was odd if you thought about it. Her timing in coming home; just when she and Brad had developed a closeness. They’d almost consummated their relationship. She winced as her mind dreamed up “what ifs” and “what might have been.” “Brad, I’m so sorry. I should have known better. Please, is there anything I can do?”