BOUND TO HIM BY FORCE

24. A TEAR FOR A SOUL

I finished my food. The chatter had picked up at some point. My food was done, not sure where to put my plate but I left it by the cell door, walking out and leaving it open just to tempt them.

I walked past the men, clothes in one hand with my tiny box on the other. Heads turned, yet no one said a thing directly to me. My feet came to a halt, coming face to face with a large chest, the man’s p***s swinging from side to side. My eyes shot down, wide with all the anger I had vanishing away as I closed my eyes, jumping up and out of the way, filling the hall with so much laughter. I ran out of there, not even looking back, the first p***s I had seen and oohh my it would torture me until I went to my grave. I just wanted to vomit.

I stumbled out; the air cool. My feet carried me to the animal shelter.

I looked around. The lights were turned on there but besides the animals, there was no one there to my knowledge. I opened the tap, washing the clothes I had pulled from the dead men. The guilt suddenly set in but I swallowed it. No guilt was allowed in my body. I continued washing them, no soap, just water. The stains washed away as best as they could. I then looked around again, finding the barn empty except for the animals. I took off my damp clothes, washing them and placing them aside with the others before taking my bar soap and washcloth to clean my body. I finished in no time, suddenly realizing I had not carried clothes to wear after. I sighed, putting on the clothes I had been wearing, as wet as they were. I shook my head. What had my life turned to?

There I was, dripping with each step I took. I closed my eyes, no care was allowed in my body. I reached the entryway, most of the men having cleared to their cells where they lay on their mattresses. I got to mine; the metal plate/tray was gone.

My boots were placed under the bed, taking off my clothes and hanging them on the cell door.

I put the deodorant on, no oil for my skin, leaving it dry. I shook my head.

There was nothing for me to wear, deciding to pull out Azrail’s coat. After inspecting it, it was still in good condition. I pulled it around, wearing it on my body and slipping the buttons on. It was bigger than me but it was so warm. It was quality, the best for my husband. I shook my head.

My hands went into the pockets only to freeze. What was I feeling?

I pulled out the two objects with two sharp knives to my view. It was the same knives he had used to kill those people in the stock house. The same knives he had stuck on my throat.

A smile graced my face, slipping the two knives right under my mattress carefully so they would not fall. Who knows what could happen? This place would not be kind to me, I could tell. I had to be smart. I had to rip out all I was used to. My past life was gone and I had to learn to adapt. My body slowly lowered to the mattress, no longer feeling even the pains anymore.

My eyes closed, my hands wrapped around my burning waist, slowly drifting with exhaustion finally setting in. The exhaustion made the bed feel like a thousand-dollar king bed. I sighed, relaxing with sleep claiming me.

I shifted in my sleep, knowing something had pulled me from it but not sure what.

Whatever it was, it was gone. I sank back to sleep only to shift again, something had pulled me from my deep sleep again. My body ached even worse than before sleeping, groaning as I turned. Sleep came back but before it could take me, I felt the brush of a hand on my skin, other hands coming to grip my body.

I shrilled, turning around so quickly as my eyes shot open. Hands immediately came closing my mouth, muffling my sounds with two men staring down at me, seeing just their eyes white and wide as if crazed.

I fought and fought, moving from side to side. The man who had his hand on my mouth worked on my buttons while the other pinned me down.

My heart would kill me, eyes wide, a tear sliding through followed by another. I kicked and kicked, fighting with all I had but it was not enough.

I stopped fighting, my eyes closing.

Do not be afraid.

I told myself. I had been trained since I was young, I was not scared of anyone.

My eyes opened, my hand going under the mattress, wires tearing through my skin. The men were wide-eyed with what they were seeing, the coat falling open with each man grabbing a breast. I did not cry as much as my skin was crawling in disgust.

Fear would only bring my death.

I found the knife, pulling it out to strike.

The man near me cried out, blood falling on my skin. I shifted the knife to the other hand pulling the other with the other man stared shocked at what had happened.

When I rose from that mattress, I was craving nothing but blood.

I slashed the hands of the man gripping me, his blood coating me. Thank the lord for the HIV one time vaccination shot I took five years back when it was introduced or I would be the walking dead from all the blood I had been bathing in.

The second man groaned with the another hitting him to keep quiet. I jumped up, slashing the first one’s neck and leaving him gasping. The second one tried running away but I jumped on his back, my knife digging in his shoulder as the other found his neck, taking his life and leaving my cell painted in blood.

I felt him shake, choking and choking on blood until his body fell with a thud.

“What is happening there? We are trying to sleep!” A voice came with nothing but irritation just as the body I hugged fell face-first into the ground with a large thud.

“What are you doing? Keep it down!” Another voice came.

I continued hugging the body until I felt the soul depart from it. My hand slipped away, placing my knives on the floor. The rats were already running their way to the dead bodies. I peeled all the clothes away from the dead bodies and placed them aside before opening my cell door and dragging each body out.

I pulled and pulled; the sound was heard all over until I felt beds creak.

Blood was left painting the floor.

I reached the entryway, tugging the body out to dump it right there. I heaved, sweat on my forehead. I walked in, getting to my cell, passing men watching from the cell doors with sleep gone from them.

I pulled the other body out, pulling and pulling.

The men cursed, seeing two of them run out, sure they were calling the superiors.

The second body was dumped out, walking back in while closing my coat. Getting to my cell I could only stare, nothing but blood all over. The clothes I had washed were painted with blood.

I did not even know where to clean first but before doing anything, I rushed and took one knife to hide it. Just as the cell door opened, I placed the mattress down, the other knife on the floor.

I watched as the man who came when I woke up the first day walked in slowly, picking up the knife on the floor. He turned to me, holding it out.

“They came with it; they were trying to r*pe me.” I justified but did not know why with each step he took I took another one back.

“And you decided to kill them?” The man asked with me nodding my head.

I had realized the men in this place had no morals whatsoever so I knew it would not be an issue but who was I kidding.

I hit the wall, no place to hide. A smirk spread on the face of the man with him walking closer and closer until he was just before me. His hand went to my hair and I knew I was in sh*t.

He pulled me with it and I fought so hard not to scream, I fought so hard not to cry. The pain intensified, my feet tying each other having me fall but the man held me up with my hair, dragging me along as I had dragged the dead bodies.

I tried prying his hands away with mine but he never gave way.   

“Come on boys, our princess wants to give us another show.” The man shot through.

“Wake everyone and tell them the princess wants to entertain us.” The man continued until we were out. I thought he would let me go like the previous night but he did not. He dragged. I stopped trying to pry his hands away and got a footing so he would stop dragging me. I got a hold of my feet, walking after him, walking closer to him so the gap between us would not be much leading to him failing to pull my hair but who was I talking about.

He took longer steps, dragging me with my hair I was sure I had lost many strands.

We entered the fighting pits, more men shuffling in with the lights turned on.

The mud was still there, having me wonder how it was always wet.

The man finally let go of me. I heaved, my hands shaking as I raised them to my hair and my skull was burning hard along with my face.

I wanted to cry so bad, wanting to weep my heart out yet a single tear was a soul. Two had been taken by my own hands for the two tears that had escaped, more would fall from more tears.