Plaything

Toxic

Nikole



I laid there, breathless and trembling, my body slick with sweat and my wrists still tingling from where he’d bound them. Jay’s hands were gentle now as he untied me, his fingers a stark contrast to the harsh leather of the restraints he’d used earlier. The heat of his touch left me feeling, and I couldn’t tell if it was from pleasure or something far darker.

Was this what I wanted? Was this what it meant to be his? The thought made my chest tighten, but I didn’t move. I didn’t speak. For the first time ever, I was too scared of what I’d say if I did. Jay hovered over me, his gaze like a fire burning into my beautiful dark brown skin.

“What did I say?” he asked, his voice low and deadly calm.

I swallowed hard, my throat dry. “You said I belong to you.”

“And?”

“And only you,” I whispered, hating the way my voice sounded so small, so submissive. Yet, it felt right in a way that scared me to my core. I didn’t want to give him that kind of power, but somehow, he’d taken it without me even realizing it. His fingers gripped my chin, forcing me to look up at him. “Good, baby,” he said, a twisted smile tugging at his lips. “You’re learning.”

The praise shouldn’t have made me feel good, but it did. I couldn’t help the warm sensation that I was feeling. I was trapped in something I didn’t understand, and part of me didn’t want to fight it.

He pulled me into his arms, cradling me like I was something precious now. It was almost disorienting, the way he could switch from harsh to tender. He kissed the top of my head, smoothing his hand down my back. “You took your punishment well,” he murmured. “I’m proud of you.”

A shiver ran through me at his words. Proud? What kind of toxic s**t was this, where I craved his approval like this? Where his praise made my whole body sing with satisfaction? I couldn’t make sense of it, but when he finally let me go, I just nodded and got up to get dressed. My legs felt shaky, and every step was a reminder of the punishment he’d given me — the way he’d teased me, taken me right to the edge and then denied me, again and again, until I was begging. And he loved it. He loved the power he had over me. But maybe I did too.

Later that week, I found myself standing in my kitchen, cooking dinner. I was chopping onions and seasoning the salmon I was going to put on my indoor grill. I was humming to myself like everything was normal, but it wasn’t. It was far from it. Jay had texted me earlier, telling me to have dinner ready by the time he got there. No please, no asking — just an order. And the f****d-up part? I obeyed without a second thought. Six days in now and he was acting like I was his woman. I had reminded myself several times that I was his plaything, a toy that he could play with whenever he wanted to. The thought of it was a little sick, but being in the act felt different. He fixed my car as promised and made it run again. He also told me if I wanted a new car, just let him know what kind and he'd get it for me. I went to my interview and landed the job as an insurance adjuster, making great money. Things seemed to be in an alignment for me.

When he walked in, he didn’t say a word. He just looked at the table, seeing the dinner I’d prepared, and gave me a single nod of approval. My breath hitched, and I realized how much I craved that small bit of it. It was toxic, wasn’t it? But it made me feel good, made me feel seen. Even if it was all twisted and wrong.

“Sit,” he told me, and I did. Like a damn dog, I did. I wanted to argue with him, but the idea of being tormented didn’t sit well with me today. We ate in silence, but his sock-covered foot slid up my leg under the table, a reminder of who was in control. My body responded before I could stop it, heat flooding through me at his touch.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked, his voice soft but demanding.

I looked up at him, my fork pausing halfway to my mouth. “Nothing,” I lied.

He tilted his head, eyes narrowing. “Try again.” He knew I wasn't telling the truth.

I swallowed hard. “I was thinking about you,” I admitted quietly.

His smirk was slow, pleased. “That’s where your mind should be.” He leaned back, taking a sip of his drink, completely at ease. “Tell me, do you like being obedient?”

My face heated up, and I wanted to say no, to argue, but the truth came out anyway. “Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because… I don’t know,” I muttered, dropping my gaze. “Because it makes you happy.” And I get rewarded with the best s*x I've ever encountered.

“And that makes you happy?”

I didn’t answer right away. I couldn’t admit that out loud, not yet. But we both knew the truth. He’d been training me well, and it wasn’t just in the bedroom. It seemed to have seeped into every part of my life now. He had a hold on me, one I didn’t know how to break. If I even wanted to.

After dinner, he pulled me into his lap on the couch, cradling me like I was something fragile. He stroked my hair, the silence between us heavy but comfortable in a way I didn’t want to think too hard about.

“You’re mine, Nikole,” he whispered against my ear. I loved when he called me by full name. It's way he say it, like its a pledge. I should’ve been happy about it, but he seemed tense. “I don’t care who flirts with you. I don’t care who thinks they can have you. They’re wrong. You’re mine.”

The words sent a shiver down my spine, both thrilling and terrifying. I should have pushed him away, told him he was wrong, that I belonged to no one. But instead, I leaned into him, letting his possessiveness wrap around me like a warm, suffocating blanket.

“I know,” I whispered back.

I settled deeper into his arms, my head resting on Jay’s chest as he absently stroked my hair. The TV flickered with some show I wasn’t paying attention to; I was too caught up in my thoughts. He’d gotten into my head in ways I couldn’t have anticipated, and now, here I was, feeling safe in his arms despite the psychological challenges of this arrangement. He picked up his phone and then closed it out. I shouldn’t feel some type of way, but I do. A nagging curiosity lingered. I knew so little about him. He was a mechanic — that much I figured out the hard way when he fixed my car, trading labor for my body. Yet beyond that, he was a mystery, one I couldn’t ignore any longer. I knew his name, Jabari Moore, his birthday, December 12th. But what about his family? He had no wife, girlfriend, or kids, which was great because I wasn’t sure how I would feel being that person to mess up a happy home. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve slept with married men before, but they were either separated from the wife or in the process of divorce. His phone buzzed on the coffee table, snapping me out of my thoughts. He didn’t reach for it immediately, just kept his eyes on the TV, like he didn’t care. But I saw the slight tension in his jaw, the way his fingers paused in my hair.

“You gonna get that?” I asked, tilting my head up to look at him.

Jay’s eyes flicked down to meet mine, guarded as always. “Nah, it’s nothing,” he waved off dismissively, but I didn’t miss the tightness in his voice.

I sat up a bit, narrowing my eyes. “Is that why you’ve been so tense tonight? You keep checking your phone like you’re waiting for something or someone.”

He laughed, but it was hollow. “You’re being paranoid.”

“I’m observant,” I shot back, my frustration was growing. "Come on. You know more about me than I know about you. It’s not fair.”

He exhaled slowly, rubbing a hand over his beard. For a second, I thought he might actually tell me something real. But then his eyes hardened, and he gave me a smirk that didn’t reach his eyes. “I’m just a mechanic, baby. What else is there to know?”

The way he brushed me off pissed me off, and I pulled away from him, standing up. “You’re full of s**t, you know that?” I snapped, crossing my arms. “You think I don’t notice the way you act sometimes? Hot one minute, then cold the next. I knew the moment I met you that you got some s**t going on, Jabari. And I’m not stupid enough to pretend otherwise. What is it? You have a wife?”

He stood too, towering over me, his presence filling the room. “Watch it, Nik,” he warned, but there was a flicker of something in his eyes — uncertainty, maybe even fear. I squared my shoulders, refusing to back down.

“No. You watch it,” I challenged. “Because I’m not some obedient little plaything as you call it, who’s just going to stay in the dark. If I’m yours, then you need to be honest with me as well.”

There was a pause and the silence stretched between us. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest, and I knew I was pushing him, maybe too far. But I didn’t care. I needed answers. He grabbed his phone, staring at the screen for a moment before shoving it into his pocket.

“Fine,” he bit out. “You wanna know more about me? Let’s go.”

I blinked, surprised at the sudden shift. “What?”

“You heard me,” he said, already heading toward the door. “Get your shoes on. We’re going for a drive.”

My stomach twisted with nerves, but I didn’t hesitate. I grabbed my sneakers and followed him out, the tension crackling between us like static. We drove in silence for what felt like hours, though it was probably only twenty minutes at the most. I kept stealing glances at Jay’s profile, his jaw clenched tight, his grip on the wheel almost too firm. He was taking me somewhere, and I had no idea what I’d find when we got there.

Eventually, he pulled up to a nondescript building in an industrial part of Sunderland. It looked abandoned, but there were a few cars parked out front, high-end and sleek, totally out of place. My pulse quickened with unease.

“What is this place?” I asked as he parked the truck.

“You wanted to know more about me,” he said simply, not looking at me. “So here we are.”

He got out, and I followed, the cold night air biting into my skin. Jay’s hand found mine, squeezing it once before he led me to a side door. He punched in a code on a keypad, and the door clicked open. Inside, it was a completely different world. The space smelled of engine oil mixed with something metallic. A few men stood around, talking in low voices. They all went quiet when they saw Jay, their gazes sliding towards me with curious looks.

“Who’s this?” one of the guys asked, his voice slick with amusement.

Jay’s grip on my hand tightened, his body stiffening. “Mind your business, Adrian” he snapped, leading me past them and into a back room.

“What is going on?” I whispered, panic creeping into my voice. This was no ordinary garage. The vibe was off, and I had a feeling that whatever he was about to tell me was not good. He closed the door behind us, locking it before turning to face me. For the first time, I saw something raw and unfiltered in his expression.

“You said you wanted to know me,” he began, running a hand over his waves. “But there’s s**t about me that you’re not ready to hear. Things I’ve kept hidden because once you know, there’s no going back.”

“What do you mean?” I pressed, my voice barely above a whisper. “I’m not a fragile woman, so tell me what it is.”

He took a deep breath. “I’m not just a mechanic,” he admitted. “I also run an underground chop shop, and not just for any cars, but stolen parts and stolen cars. I handle different jobs for people who don’t ask too many questions and make twice as much as I do with my legal business.”

I processed his words and stepped back, shaking my head. “You’re into illegal s**t?”

He moved closer, his eyes dark and pleading. “Nik, listen to me. I kept this from you to protect you. If I get involved with the wrong people, then it can be dangerous. There’s something more that’s brewing between us and I'm trying to keep you at arms length. But the truth is that I like your feisty ass.”

I stared at him, my mind racing. This wasn’t what I expected. I thought he was just some controlling asshole mechanic who liked to play rough. But this? This was dangerous, a whole different kind of toxic. And yet… It explained so much why he struggled with being gentle or rough.

I took a shaky breath. “You should have told me.”

“I’m telling you now,” he said softly. “And I’m giving you a choice. You can walk away, right now. I won’t stop you.”

He stepped back, giving me space, his eyes never leaving mine. It was the first time he’d offered me real to leave, a chance to choose. I should take it. Any woman in their right mind would, but me, I never ran from s**t.

As messed up as it was, I didn’t want to leave. I wanted him. All of him, even the parts that were dark and dangerous. Maybe it made me just as toxic, but I couldn’t walk away. I took a step toward him, closing the distance. “No,” I said quietly. “I’m still yours.”

Relief flooded his expression, and he pulled me into his arms, holding me tight like he was afraid I’d disappear.

“You’re a crazy woman,” he murmured against my hair.

“Yeah,” I breathed out, wrapping my arms around his neck. “But it looks like I met my match.”