Mentally in love

Chapter eight - Progress

Dean's POV:

Jeremy and Lia became close. She tries to let go of her kid state, but it's hard for her. I think Bri is the reason for that. It was her best friend but had ended her life. I don't know if she had other friends. It doesn't look like that. At least Brianna managed to talk with her. Now things are a bit better. Jeremy is a big part of that. He doesn't leave her side for a minute. I'm starting to think that he has feelings for her. Maybe it's not true, but it looks like that. One day, they might go out of here and live together. I would love to help them. After all, they are my friends. It's not like I haven't talked with the other people here. Well, with some of them, it was hard. I couldn't understand what they were saying. I'm leaving soon. I don't have to worry about that anymore. I still plan to come here if I need help or to talk with Brianna. She won't turn me back. This is part of her job. Also, she gave me her phone number. Surprisingly, I am the only one who has it. I promised not to give it to anyone else. I don't want random people to call her in the middle of the night. That's why I won't do it when I go home. I will deal with everything alone. Maybe I will tell my parents about my current state, but it won't be soon. I want to see how good I will be at home. Later, I will think about the rest. My parents might be happy to see me, but I won't be sure about Leo. I left him while he was growing up. It wasn't the best decision, but I needed help. I couldn't let my parents take care of this, too. It was enough everything they did for me. From now on, I have to deal with my problems alone. It won't be easy, but I have to do it. I hope that this won't go in the wrong direction. I don't want to become that person again.

It's my last week in the hospital. I should stay more, but I don't see a reason for that. Brianna and I have talked every day since I came here. Nothing is helping me. I am taking the place of someone who needs it. I have no idea who will come here, but they need this place more than me. I better go home and see what happens. I know my parents will help me. They always did it. The thing is that I feel bad for them. They don't deserve to have a son like me. Sadly, I can't do anything about that. Ending everything is not a solution to the problem.

I woke up and went to the bathroom. Then I went to get dressed. I saw Jeremy passing by. I think he is going to Lia's room. I don't know what is happening with them, but I'm glad they are together. They need each other a lot. Lia needs a friend. A real friend. Jeremy needs someone by his side. Also, their stories are not that different. When I was ready, I went for breakfast. I might have lost some weight here. Honestly, I did it before that. Soon, both of them sat with me.

- Good morning. How are you two?

- I'm still sleepy. Bri wanted a story. - Lia said

- What story did you tell her?

- The one for Cinderella. She loves it. Me too.

- What about you?

- I'm still in a good mood. That is surprising. - Jeremy said

- Hey, she is here. You will be fine.

- I think the ten-year-old Lia is slowly going away.

- That is good. What she needs is to let go of Bri.

- I don't think this is possible. That was her best friend.

- But now she has you.

- So? I can't replace her.

- I didn't say that. You can be her new best friend. Maybe you are not like Bri. Well, I'm sure you will do everything to help her.

- Yes, I will.

- See? Be there with her, and everything will be fine.

- What about you? When will you leave?

- After a week.

- What happened with your girl?

- What about her?

- Do you still want to find her?

- Yes, I do. Maybe my parents can help me.

- I think there won't be any need for that.

- Why?

- You two will meet on your own.

- Why are you so sure?

- Because you care about her.

- So?

- He knows what he is doing.

- Who is he?

- The one above you.

- I get it. I hope that he will help me.

- That is his job. He always helps good people. That includes you.

- I won't count myself as a good person.

- Why?

- Look at all the things I did. Now I am here.

- But you knew you needed help. That is progress. You didn't let yourself drown.

- I wasted five years.

- No, you got the answer to your condition. Get out of here and find her. She is what you need.

- What if it doesn't help?

- It won't if you keep talking like that.

- I get it. Thanks.

- You're welcome.

We kept talking for a while. When I finished my breakfast, I went for a session with Brianna. Honestly, I don't know what to tell her anymore. I don't feel any different. Days go one by one, but there is no change. I hope that what she told me is true. I want to find Lesly and fix our friendship. I knocked on her door and walked in.

- I'm here.

- I see. Sit down.

- Thanks.

- How do you feel today? After a week, you will be at home.

- I am excited and nervous.

- Did you plan what to tell your parents?

- No, I didn't. Maybe I'll be honest and tell them everything.

- That is the best idea. Don't try to make yourself look like someone else in the story. Be honest. Parents appreciate that.

- I'm worried about Leo.

- Why?

- I left him when he was growing up. I don't think he will want me around anymore.

- That is something for which you two have to talk. No parents.

- What if he hates me?

- I don't think he does. Maybe it will take him some time to accept that you are at home again. After some time, everything will be the way it used to be.

- I don't know how to talk with him. He probably has changed a lot.

- That's why you need to talk with him. You have to get to know the new Leo. He is eighteen, right?

- Yes, he is.

- Try to find the correct language with him. It won't be easy, but you shouldn't give up. After all, five years have passed.

- I know. That's what makes it so hard.

- Give him some time. Meanwhile, you can try to find Lesley.

- I might ask my parents for help. No matter that, I never told them about her.

- I'm sure they would love to help you with that.

- That's what I hope. I want to have her as my friend again. Well, if she wants the same.

- I haven't met her, but I think she didn't forget you.

- Why do you think like that?

- You are not easy to forget. Also, I think you grew up too fast. You taught her many things. I'm trying to say that you were the older brother she never had. I think she still has a place in her heart for you.

- I would love that.

- Do you want to be the older brother again or only a friend?

- I don't know. Maybe both.

- That is not an easy task.

- But I don't plan to give up. This is important to me.

- I'm glad to hear that. It's good that you have some priorities.

- She is my first one. Well, maybe after my parents.

- That is good.

Brianna and I talked until it was time for lunch. I saw Jeremy playing with Lia. Sometimes, she acts her age. The kid inside of her is still fighting for dominance. I'm sure she wants to grow up. The thing is that something is not letting her. I believe this might be Bri. They were best friends. Also, the same thing happened to both of them. Sadly, only one of them escaped and saved herself. Maybe it wasn't meant to be. I think Jeremy will help her. Both of them feel good together. This time, Brianna sat with me. My friends came too. Lia was happy, like a little kid.

- What happened?

- Nothing. I played a game with her.

- This is why she is so happy.

- I hope I did well.

- Can we play in the afternoon too? - Lia asked

- Yes, but after my session with Brianna. I want to talk with you.

- No problem. I always have time for you. - Brianna said

- Thanks.

- Lia, do you want us to talk too?

- For what? Can I bring Bri with me?

- Yes, you can.

- Thank you.

- I don't think she will let go of her soon. - I whispered to Brianna

- I will work on that with her. Maybe she can try to focus on Jeremy.

- That will be good for her. At least he is here. You know what I mean.

- I do. This is what is holding her back from her childhood. Also, the fact that she never had one.

- How did she come here? You need a parent's signature.

- True, but I let her in without one.

- Why?

- I saw the stains on her arms. I didn't need anything else.

- I understand.

- When she came here, she was confused. She refused to talk with anyone. Then, the ten-year-old Lia came and never left.

- She had to deal with too many things.

- She did.

After lunch, I walked to my room for a nap. I have nothing to do here. That's why I only sleep and eat. Well, sometimes I go out in the backyard. It's not much, but it's better than nothing. After all, I can't stay inside all day. I have to do something. I set one alarm for after an hour. Hopefully, I will wake up. If I sleep too much, I won't fall asleep tonight.

I turned off my phone and got up. It was a good nap, but I can't sleep longer. Later, I walked to the backyard. I saw Jeremy sitting alone. Maybe Lia is with Brianna. Honestly, I'm impressed with this woman's skills. She knows how to talk with everyone. I wouldn't be able to do it. Not the way she does.

- Hey. How was the session?

- It was good. I wanted to say some things.

- It's good that you are opening up.

- I'm trying my best. It's not easy for me. I still don't feel comfortable talking about everything.

- That is normal. I feel the same way. That's why I don't know how to talk with my parents.

- You will be fine. Be happy that you have where to go. Lia and I don't have this.

- Maybe one day you two can get out of here and live together.

- Don't you want too much?

- It will be good for both of you.

- Maybe, but I don't think that far away. I don't even know what will happen tomorrow.

- The same things that happen every day here.

- Don't talk like that. You don't know that for sure.

- What can happen? A bomb to hit the building?

- Very funny. I'm serious.

- Me too. Try to use the time here to get close to her. She trusts you. Do you know how much time this took her? Years. I'm leaving soon. That's why you have to take care of her.

- How?

- By being by her side. That is all she needs.

- Do you think I can do it?

- No, I know it.

- If you say so.

Jeremy and I talked for an hour. Later, Lia came. I don't know if something happened, but she snuggled into him like a kid. I used to do the same with my mom when I was scared. He looked at me, but I didn't say anything. Hopefully, he will realize what is going on. She needs him. He does, too. No matter that, he will never admit it. After some time, we went for dinner. I will miss the cooking here. It can't compare with my mom's one. Well, it was delicious.

- I will miss the food here.

- You can always come to eat here. - Jeremy said

- Man, this is not a restaurant. I can't come whenever I want.

- You are always welcome to search for me.

- Oh, hi, Brianna.

- The doors will always be open for you.

- If you weren't married, I would say something is happening. - Jeremy said, chuckling

- I suggest you be careful with the words. - Brianna said

- I get it.

- Good.

- How was the session with Lia? - I asked

- It was good. I managed to talk with the adult one for a while. She is still hurt about what happened.

- Who wouldn't be?

- It will take her some time, but she will be fine.

For the rest of the dinner, we kept talking. I have only three people around me. Well, they have helped me the most. I mean, even Lia. We started talking recently, but I liked her. Mostly, I got attached to her story. I still feel bad for her. Probably that is because she is a girl. My head still can't understand why this happened. She was only fifteen. I can't understand some people. Maybe it's better if I don't try. I won't change anything anyway. I was about to go to bed when Jeremy came.

- Can I come in?

- Sure.

- I won't stay long.

- You can stay as much as you need.

- Thanks.

- What is that?

- Lia and I made it after dinner. She told me to give this to you. These are the first letters of our names. L, J, and D. It's not much, but we hope you like it.

- Thank you. I'm sure the idea was hers.

- The ten-year-old Lia has good ideas.

- Don't you want to be with the adult one?

- I do, but it's not urgent. I like her the way she is.

- So you admit it?

- Admit what?

- You said you liked her.

- No, I didn't mean that way. Anyway. I'll leave you to sleep. We'll see each other tomorrow for breakfast.

- Yes, sure. Good night.

- To you, too. Bye.

- Bye. - I said, and he left

Now I have a new bracelet. There is no way I will forget them. I might not be doing much here, but I have some memories with them. I felt Lia as my little sister. Even though we are the same age, I still care. Maybe this is why I want to find Lesley so much. I want to take care of her like I used to. I told her all these things because I was sure she had no one to talk to about them. Also, she needed to know the real side of life. Not everything is so colorful. Sometimes, things get too hard, but you can't give up. Otherwise, you will lose the battle. I hope that she is not in the same state as me.