Ghost

CHAPTER 5

"Umalis ka na kasi. Ang kulit mo naman Benedict! Ang epal mo eh lalo lang akong naii-stress sayo! Acid-forming ka!" He just smirks na parang may nakakatawa sa sinabi ko. He just looked at me with amusement. Kahit kelan hindi na naging maganda ang takbo ng buhay ko ospital na ito simula ng dumating ang lalaking ito.

Isinumpa na yata akong pahirapan ni Benedict. He's really good in tormenting me. Nakakaloka na siya at sarap kalmutin ng mga pulang nail polish ko ang maganda niyang mukha! Did I just say beautiful?! No... Ang landi mo Cassandra! Mapapatay 'to ni Anthony pag nadatnan siya. My brother will beat the sh*t out of him kung mananatili pa siya dito. He's digging his own grave at ayoko ng bloodshed sa room ko.

"I checked your records, at nakita kong may kalokohan kang ginawa. You intubated a DNR (Do not resuscitate) patient. You knew the rules and yet you broke them all. You disregarded the instructions and disobeyed the poor man." I looked at him with disgust. I rolled my eyes at him. I hate this conversation.

"His wife is in Canada with his kids! Malay mo dumating. You have no idea how to lose a life, Dr. Saavedra. When you're near the flat line, maraming kang maiisip. Marami pa siyang hindi nagagawa. He's recovering at isang beses pa lang siya nagcardiac arrest. He still has the chance to live. I got to know the guy noong unang dinala siya dito." I looked away from him.

Naiiyak na kasi ako dahil mabait ang pasyenteng sinasabi niya at kahapon gumalaw ang dalawang daliri niya. His lips twitched at alam kong may chance pa siya mabuhay.

"Still... you broke them. Make sure to stay where you're supposed to be or papabakunahin kita ng mga bata. Obey the rules." I rolled my eyes at him for the second time. How come he looks relaxed while eating a bag of chips?

His eyes look tired at namumula na sa antok. His hair is kind of messy and he looks... well tired. He's just sitting beside me at wala akong choice kundi ang makinig sa mga pangaral niya.

"Whatever. Just get out and i will sleep. Malapit na dumating ang kapatid ko." He gave me another sexy smirk! Ayoko ng ganyang panglalandi! Pakiramdam ko mauubusan ako ng hininga! Kailangan ko yata ng nebulizer utang na loob.

"He won't be back in five hours. May mga nafood poison at madami sila. Pinatawag lahat ng doktor na pwede at pagod na ako kaya hindi ako sumama. I'm resting here with you, at least nagtatrabaho pa din. Bayad ang pahinga ko kasama ka." I sighed. He's a hopeless motherfvcker. Ginawa niya pa akong excuse para makatakas sa trabaho.

"Get out."

"No."

"Why?"

"Kasi ayaw ko? At wag kang magulo, papalitan ko dextrose mo. Paubos na kasi, baka lumobo ang kamay mo." I ignored him and checked my phone. 10 PM na pala. Wala akong matext dahil wala naman akong jowa. This is getting worse. Ayokong makipagdayalogo sa walang modong katulad ni Benedict.

"Texting a bed mate? Sabi ko nga ako na lang, at least safe at magaling pa." I threw a pillow at him. Ang bastos ng hinayupak! Kapal-kapal talaga ng mukha niya! Kung pwede lang hinampas ko na ang stand ng dextrose sa pagmumukha niya na kahit gwapo di ako magsisisi.

"Shut up and please, may taste ako. Ayoko sayo. Deal with it or pay some prostitutes kung may pambayad ka."

"Of course may pambayad ako. I'm a rich man, Cassie. I can even buy you, pero you're priceless kaya nga ikaw ang gusto ko. Come on, malapit lang ang villa unit ko dito sa ospital. Pwede ka rin matulog doon minsan." I gave him another death stare.

"Excuse me, may sarili kaming condo unit ni Anthony sa Ayala kaya wala akong balak na matulog sa villa unit whatever mo. I'm a wealthy chick, Benedict. Nakakalimutan mo yata kung sino ang parents namin." I smiled at him and just smiled. He insulted my trust fund?! Of all people na nakakaalam ng wealth naming magkapatid siya ang walang bilib?!

"Of course, mabait yata si tita Elena. She used to call me Ben. Lagi ka pa nga niyang ibinibilin sa akin tuwing may nanliligaw sayo."

"Never speak of my mother's name from your filthy mouth. Wag kang mag-feeling na close sa pamilya ko. You we're just a pigment from my dirty past. Sana hindi ka na bumalik. You are opening wounds again, Benedict. I'm beginning to remember how stupid I was to gave you my everything. I was so stupid. Nagsisisi akong nakilala pa kita. I wonder how you sleep at night knowing you broke someone else's soul? Mahimbing ba?" Naiiyak ako pero nanatili akong nakatingin sa phone ko. I just texted Alex kung kamusta ang party sa opisina nila kahapon. I'm really starting to feel hurt again.

"Oo, mahimbing naman ang pagtulog ko kasi ikaw ang nasa mga panaginip ko. You always make my dream lucid, Cassie. I wonder how you do that? Are you a witch or something?" I stopped texting and looked at him. How come he's just cool about it? He's such a heartless bastard.

"Wag mo akong isali sa panaginip mo. I don't care! Mamaya magulat ka na lang nilalagyan ko na ng morphine ang kape mo sa sobrang inis. 'wag mong antaying tusukan kita ng amphetamine dahil naubos na ang pasensya ko." He just giggled like a child.

"They will revoke your license, and besides, a smarty pants like you wouldn't do such a horrid thing." He winked and I looked away. Alam niya ang sinasabi niya because he knew me so well dahil malabest friends nga kami dati! Arggggh! Please lord, give me the strength ro defy his gravity. Parang hindi yata 9.80 m/s ang gravity kapag andito siya!

"Whatever, just get out please. Nakakasira ka ng mood." He just laughed and began eating the burger he bought earlier bago pa pumunta dito. He removed his ID lace and white at nagsimulang kumain. Ngayon lang pala siya nagdinner? No, Cassandra. Don't feel sorry dahil hindi niya deserve ang pag-aalala mo.

"I won't. Malungkot sa bahay at baka tawagin lang ako sa ER. I'd rather stay here and watch you fall asleep with your awesome red hair against the white pillows." He smiled in the sexiest manner. He is seducing me! Malandi siya at sobrang galing niyang manlandi dahil naaakit ang malanding kaluluwa ko. No, I am not an easy lay. I can't be!

"Umalis ka na kasi baka magcardiac arrest ako sa sobrang inis sayo."

"Baka dahil sobrang gwapo ko? Come on, alam naman nating gwapong-gwapo ka pa rin sa akin. Baka nga namiss mo na ang... thing ko eh. I'm giving you exclusivity with my thing, tapos ayaw mo? Sayang naman ako." He made a face and resumed eating. How come he's this stubborn?!

"Nakakadiri ka, knowing na kumakain ka eh ang tibay ng sikmura mong pag-usapan... ang... f*********n. Anyways, stay if you like but stop talking to me about your thing." I faced the other side and stared at the window. Walang stars ngayon, kaasar. I used to do that pero ngayon iba na ang lahat.

"Nandidiri ka eh regular nga tayo dati. You loved screaming my name, Cassandra. Thank goodness ako ang nakauna kundi wala kang orgasms." I threw him a death stare and threw him another pillow. Nasalo niya iyon at tumawa. He drank his coke and resumed sitting beside me.

"You and your filthy mouth! Arrgh! Why am I in a hell hole?!" I covered myself with a blanket and decided to sleep. Ayokong kaharap siya, baka mamaya mawala na ako sa katinuan.

"Wag mo naman ako pagtaguan, Cassandra. I just want company and don't worry wala akong balak na halayin ka or buntisin ka. Dapat may consent mo pa rin." I felt him tickling my side.

"Ano ba! Pucha naman, matutulog na ako! Hello, ilang oras akong nagshift at hindi ako lalabas sa loob ng kumot na 'to. Keep yourself company." Malakas ang tunog ng dibdib ko. Kasi naman, ang landi-landi ng kaluluwa ko dahil naaakit siya kay uber-handsome Dr. Saavedra.

"Ayoko. I'll sleep on the couch. Sleep tight, Cass." Then he turned off the light and I saw him cheking my dextrose.

Sa kaloob-looban ko parang may bandang tumututog ng rock music. Sobrang sasabog na ang dibdib ko sa kaba. He used to make me feel this way noong college pa lang ako. He really knows me well. Malamang alam niyang gusto ko pa rin siya.

But I committed suicide and almost died because of my love for him.

Lagi kong itinatatak sa isipan ko na halos mamatay ako sa pagmamahal kong hindi man lang niga nasuklian. All he did was to fvck me while loving Annie. Everything was all about Annie.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Nagising akong nandoon pa rin siya sa pwesto niya. He's sleeping soundly and still looking beautiful. Oo na, makalaglag panty na gwapo. He used his white coat to cover himself. He's wearing a pair of faded jeans and black v neck shirt. Kahit yun lang ang suot niya gwapo pa rin.

I yawned. Napasarap ang tulog ko at talagang hindi bumalik si Anthony. What is wrong with the world?

5 messages received

Fr: Tony boy twinnie

-Sorry on call bigla. Some folks got food poisoned

-Hey twinnie!

-Pinacheck na kita. Sleep well. X

-On call again at nasa ibang hospital ako for organ transfer. Why am i receiving too much work?! Fvck, can't even watch you.

-Be back later at 5PM

I sighed. 7 AM pa lang at mamaya pa siya makakbalik. I took the thermometer beside me at hindi na ako mainit. I checked my dextrose at napalitan na. My upper abdomen is no longer hurting and thank goodness I'm all good.

I stood up and poured myself a glass of water.

"Gising ka na pala. Let me call someone for breakfast." Tumayo siya at nagsalita sa intercom dahil mamayang 8:30 AM pa dapaf ang breakfast. I just smirked. Feeling may concern si gago. I took out my phone.

7 messages received

Fr: Dawn

-Aw, tc and ako na bhla sa shift mo.

Fr: Kayla

-Sana sinabi mo agad. On leave ako. :( tc Cassie

-Kain kasi ng meals. Don't skip!!! :(

Fr: Mark

-imagine tinablan ka ng sakit?

-jk, tc and organ delivery kami ngayon dito sa batangas. Sorry. :(

-Sorry wala kang kasama sistur...

Fr: Alex

- Can't visit. company protocol. Love you and tc. I'll come by later after work. Promise. :(

-I'll bring some food in your condo. See yah!

"Talagang natulog ka dito?"

"Yes, because I want to at wag ka na ngang makulit dyan at tatanggalin ko na mamaya ang IV sayo." He looked at me with boredom at tumayo. Nagulat ako kasi bukas ang butones at zipper niya showing his boxer shorts. I gasped at binato ko siya ng unan.

"Mahalay ka talaga! Arrrgh!"

"Kung mahalay ako, malamang ngayon pa lang buntis ka na. para namang hindi mo pa nakita ang lahat-lahat sa akin. Nahawakan naramdaman at pinasukan ka pa. Nakalimutan mo na agad ang hubad kong katawan. You wound my feelings." He casually said while peeing in an open bathroom!

"Sh*t ka!" I screames on top of my lungs.

He went back at nakatingin sa akin at buti nakazipper na ang pantalon niya. He just looked at me with his piercing perfect stare.

"Ang dami mo yatang katext?"

"Why do you care?"

"I just care."

"Whatever. Discharge me now so I can go home. I have a shift tomorrow night. I can't miss another shift." I told him and he just waited for the food to be delivered on the table. Hindi pagkaing ospital ang dinala. Galing ito sa malapit na resto sa ospital.

"Eat. Dahil di ka kumakain kaya ka nagkaka-acidity attacks."

"Okay. After this, I'm going home. Napatalikod ako at kumuha ng towel sa duffel bag na dala ni Anthony kahapon.

I felt him at my back, touching the skin on my nape his hands are cold. It was like an ice touching my burning bodice.

He saw my arrow tattoo at the back.

"You have another tattoo? Why did you tarnish your perfect skin?"

"Because I want to get tattoos? Wag ka nang makulit. I'm starving." Lumakad ako papuntang mesa at kumain na while he remained standing where I was. Ang weird na nga niya, ang epal pa. Hindi siya natinag sa kinatatayuan niya.

"Is than an arrow? Bakit arrow?"

"Hmmmm... I don't know. Parang 'shot to the heart, and you're to blame... you give love a bad name!' na feeling? Uso kasi iyan. " Iyon na lang nasagot ko kaya bumalik na ako sa pagkain. 

I can't tell him that the reason why I have an arrow tattoo is to remind myself that I have to kill him when we meet again. I need to make him suffer just like I did. I want him to die. I've been thinking of many ways but I can't find the perfect tool and timing. Maybe if I get all better I can proceed and kill him this time. Maybe? There's no way I can let him live, right?

"You need to remove all your tattoos."

"No. Why? I love them."

"No?"

"No! Benedict konting-konti na lang tatamaan ka na talaga!" He just giggled at lalo akong naasar sa kanya. 

You will be dead soon.