We Broke Up

14 - Step 4

Step 4: "Challenge your negative thoughts - Don't buy into the (negative) thoughts that emerge and slowly but steadily reengage the world."

I stepped out of my hotel room that morning with a little more bounce on my feet. I was excited to do work with my new found friends that day. Also, I would be seeing my big brother for lunch and driving back home with him that afternoon so it was really a day to look forward to. 

With my purse, laptop and camera in hand, I took the elevator down to the lobby where I was to meet Jay. He would be driving me to the Montefrio Corp's office in the city where we would meet Tessa and Riza and 10 more other employees in that branch. He would be signing a contract as my Field Marketing Assistant there then the whole team would start working on the promotional materials for the Santa Rosa project. 

I found myself absentmindedly fixing my hair, straightening some imaginary wrinkle on my button-down shirt and pencil skirt, wondering how my make-up looked at the thought of seeing him. 

"At bakit? Umaarti, Naevey. Trabaho lang yun uy. Ka-trabaho mo siya, okay? 'Mayos ka diyan." I chuckled at my own foolishness and dismissed those thoughts altogether. 

The elevator door opened and I walked straight towards the exit. I didn't see Jay around so I dialed his phone number which he gave me the night before. 

"Good morning, Miss Naveah." I could almost see the dimpled smile that came with that smooth greeting.

"Hi, Jay. I'm in the lobby na. Where are you?"

"Kinuha ko na po yung kotse, Miss Naveah. Andyan na po ako in 3... 2..."

"1..." That's right I did give him the key before he left last night. I smiled as I saw the car approaching just a few feet away from where I stood. "Okay." I said and ended the call. 

The car stopped right in front of me and Jay got out, beaming as he waved at me. "Magandang umaga po, Miss Naveah. Hot pandesal with kesong puti po. Baka hindi pa po kayo nakakapag-almusal." He grinned as he held up a brown paper bag. 

 "Bakit ba napakagwapo ng taong to? Napaka-sweet pa. Jusko! Tapos ganito araw-araw? Tama ba tong ginagawa ko? Lord, help! Grant me strength and enlightenment." I thought as I walked down the steps towards him. 

"Good morning, Jay. Sige. Kainin natin with some coffee later at the office." I said as casually as possible.

"Okay po, Miss Naveah." He told me, his eyes focused on me and staring at me like I had something on my face. 

"Jay, we should go." I reminded him after almost a minute with him still staring at me, unmoved from where he stood. He then ran to open the door to the backseat and bowed his head as he held it open for me,  a wide smile plastered on his handsome face.

I walked past him, struggling not to spare him another glance then sat inside the car quietly. There could be something there. By the way, my heart started racing when he got inside the car and closed the door, confining us in a small space filled with the mix of the floral scent of my perfume and his musky fragrance; by how his stares lingered and he would take a deep breath and smile; I was almost certain there was “something” but I could not entertain that idea. Not now. 

Fred has a pretty face too. He was kind too. He was sweet too. He was good to me too before that was why I was drawn to him. Why he became my everything. All that went wrong. 

"This has to stop." I thought. 

Not all “somethings” should be everything, sometimes they could be nothing.

The drive to the office was quiet and I could feel his occasional glances while I tried to focus on the work that I started on my laptop. A short while later, we parked in front of the office building. I immediately got out of the car as soon as the engine turned off without waiting for him to open the door. He quickly followed me and attempted to help me with my things but I politely refused. 

"Good morning, Miss Naveah." Riza greeted me as soon as I stepped inside the door.

"Good morning, Riza." I smiled. 

"Ma'am, may naghihintay po sa office niyo." Tessa said.

"Sino?" I asked.

"Ako!" Francesca beamed as she appeared by the door of my office.

"Ate Ches!" I cheered and ran to hug her tight. "I missed you! Kumusta ka na? Anong ginagawa mo dito? Si Denise? Si Sophie?" 

She chuckled as she hugged me back. "Na-miss ka din namin sobra. Ang busy mo na ngayon. Hirap mong hagilapin." She pulled away from me and cupped my cheeks. "Kumusta ka naman? I have a meeting sa Biñan kaya dumaan na ako dito."

"Oh good. Breakfast? Jay has some pandesal and kesong puti. We can all share it." I said.

"Uy, RJ. You work here na? That's good. Sigurado na ako ngayon that my baby girl will always be in good hands." She smiled. 

"Ate Ches!" I glared at her.

"Totoo naman. He's very trustworthy at efficient sa trabaho. You'll like working with him." She explained.

"That's right. Work. That's all there is with me and Jay." I thought. "I'm looking forward to seeing those traits in the following months or years that we'll be working together." I said out loud and smiled at Jay who stood quietly at the corner. 

He smiled back though more reserved than the one he had earlier. 

"May isa pa pala akong sadya dito, Naevey." Francesca said.

"Ano yun?" I asked.

"I need a favor." She sighed and held my hand which usually meant she was almost certain I would say no.

"Kinakabahan ka." I chuckled. "Ate, after all you and the girls put up with for me, you can ask me anything and I'll say yes." 

"Yes na agad ha? Sabi mo yan." She said.

"Yes, Ate Ches. Kahit ano pa yan, yes na agad." I smiled.

"Okay. Remember Francis's cousin from London?"

"Dr. Martin Cruz. Yes. Why?"

"Uuwi kasi siya next week."

"And?"

"And we were wondering if you could join us for coffee with him on Friday? Kumustahan lang. He's just had this crush on you for the longest time and we thought maybe..."

"You could set us up?" I sighed. "Ate, I'm not sure I'm ready to date anyone."

"It's not a date. Promise. Kumustahan lang. No string attached. It's also a chance for you to open your options." 

"Friday?"

"Yes. With me and Francis naman."

"Okay." I nodded. Not that I was interested in dating in any way, I just couldn't bear to disappoint her. 

"Yey!" Francesca cheered and hugged me again. "Halika na. Let's eat." She grinned.

"Oo nga pala. Tara na, Jay. Yung..." I turned to face him but he was not there anymore. Only the brown bag was left on the table beside Riza. 

"Riza, ang kuya mo?" I asked.

"Maglilinis daw po ng kotse. Nagmamadali nga eh." Riza answered.

"Malinis naman yun ah. Kaka-car wash pa lang kahapon." I said and wondered why Jay would rush to unnecessarily clean the car.