The Pain of Remembering
1664 Words
I frowned. “What do you want, Simon?”
He inclined his head to the side as if he enjoyed it a lot, provoking me with his teasing grin. “I don’t think you want to hear it in front of my cousin.”
Goddess, I couldn’t stand this man!
“Just say it!” I snapped at him, grimacing.
“Are you sure you want me to say it?” he laughed so softly; his eyes were like magnet. His gaze got more intense as he gazed into my eyes.
My throat bobbed. My heart started to beat fast inside my chest. I hated the strong effect of his stares at me. As if he had command over my body. That he knew he had that much control over me. Through the mate bond.
Kathleen raised her hands up to her head, shaking her head. She eyed Simon, threatening not to embarrass me in front of her.
Simon chuckled and then, in a second, I felt that. That small, gentle brush of something inside my head. There was a small vibration of sound that started to build until I heard it echo all over my brain. His low, sensual voice murmured to me.
[I want to see you in red, lacy lingerie tonight.]
My face heated.
“What is wrong with you!? There is no way I would wear—”
Kathleen’s eyes widened, curious, “Wear what?”
Simon chuckled once again but his turquoise eyes never left my face, still blushing from what he told me through our mind-link, “It’s for you to decide, though.”
My eyes narrowed at him, “Are you always like that?”
“No. Only to you.” He made his smile so annoyingly wide that his eyes curved like a smiling corgi. “You are so pretty when you’re mad, you know?”
Kathleen rolled her eyes at her cousin and then stood from her seat and blurted, “Oh my goddess, you two go get a room!” I could tell that Kath wanted to leave us. But she didn’t. It was as if something was stopping her the way she looked at Simon.
“So what will it be, pumpkin?” he asked again, waiting patiently for my answer. That sultry stare tempted me to bite my lower lip. My throat was dry.
[Red is okay. Although purple is a lot—]
I threw daggering looks at Simon.
He sighed and then uttered, “Follow me, then.”
I looked at Kathleen and she just shrugged her shoulders at me. She stood from her seat, though, and then whispered, “Let’s go. Before he changes his mind!”
We followed him straight to where his black, sleek car was parked in front of the house.
“What’s this?” I asked. I didn’t expect he would really take me to my family.
“Get in.”
I squinted my eyes at him. My arms folded against my chest. No, Astrid! It could be a trap!
Kathleen nervously looked at me and then at Simon. I didn’t avert my eyes from him as I studied that now-stoic look on his face. Could I really trust him?
“I don’t know what you are planning, Simon. But I have a bad feeling about it.” Kathleen whispered to his cousin as if I couldn’t hear her.
“It’s nothing dangerous, Kath. Don’t worry. I won’t put your Luna in danger. I just want to grant her what she wishes.” He raised an eyebrow at me, making my blood boil. “You want to see your family, right?”
Kathleen was right. I didn’t feel good about it either. But I was too desperate to know who I really was. The kind of family I did come from. If Simon cared so much about me, then there shouldn’t be any problem if I wanted to go visit them. Unless… unless my family didn’t like him.
“There is nothing to be worried about, Astrid.” Kath held my hand and gave me a reassuring look. “I know you can’t remember anything yet and it feels strange to be in a place with people you don’t have any memory of. But trust me when I tell you that Simon is a good man. You are safe with him. He is your husband and he will protect you with his life.” Kath smiled and I saw sincerity in those dark brown eyes.
I sighed and smiled at the beautiful lady in front of me. Maybe I couldn’t trust Simon yet but I could certainly trust Kathleen.
*****
I frowned.
“You didn’t tell me this place is an island!”
Simon stopped the car not too far from a cliff where I could see the wide, calm ocean where a lovely sunset explodes its wonderful orange-reddish color all over the cloudless, summer sky. I hopped out of his car and slammed the door shut, feeling angry and betrayed.
Gulls made a low and rich, piercing noise that echoed over the vastness of the place as the smell of a fresh and salty breeze greeted me.
“I promise I will take you to your family, Astrid. Just give me a little more time.” Simon stepped out of his car and shook his head. I could tell he was trying to muster all the patience he still had for me but I didn’t care. I wanted to know why he was stopping me from going home.
“Then tell me what is really happening, Simon!” I pleaded. I didn’t want to cry but the anxiety in me was overwhelming. “I don’t know you! I don’t know this place! Damnit, I don’t even know I am!”
“Calm down, pumpkin,” he breathed as he closed the gap between us and held my hand. I didn’t pull it from him, though. I wanted to hear what his reasons were. His explanations.
“I-I’m scared… I don’t know why but I am scared, Simon.” I finally told him, “There are images that kept on playing in my head over and over. Every night, in the middle of my sleep, they keep coming back.”
He pulled me into an embrace and kissed the top of my head. I didn’t know why it felt strange to be in his arms, but it also felt good and soothing. There was assurance in his every touch and I craved it. The warmth that calmed the storm in my heart and in my head.
“I know. I can feel them as well… “ He whispered, his lips remained on the top of my hair, “I can feel your struggle, your fear, and your pain, Pumpkin. And I will gladly share every bit of it until I can finally tell you everything. Until I can finally fix this.”
“Fix what?” I pulled gently away from him and stared into his solemn eyes. The color of the ocean. “What is it that needs to be fixed, Simon? Who is that person who wants to hurt me? Is my family safe?”
“Yes. They are safe.” He brushed the strands of hair away from my face and tucked them behind my ear. The gesture that was becoming his habit. “I make sure they are safe from the person who wants to hurt you. And I will never let anyone lay a hand on you again, my Luna. I promised myself I would never let anyone hurt you again.”
“You haven’t answered me, Simon. Who wants to hurt me?” I asked again as fear started to emerge from my chest.
He pursed his lips. He opened it and then closed it, hesitating. He averted his eyes from me and I saw pain in them. Deep pain of regret. Of guilt. And I wondered what caused him such misery.
“He was the person I failed to protect.” He answered quietly, his chest heaving as he was harboring something so heavy in his chest. “And now he wants me dead.”
A pack enemy that wanted him dead. “Is that why you are too scared to bring me back to the main land? Because you think that your enemy might attack me again?”
He didn’t answer, though. He only gazed at me so intensely that I felt that strong tension between us. That hammering thud inside my chest. The sensitivity of my skin as his arms held me tight into an embrace. His face was leaning so close that I could feel his breath brushing against my lips.
Then dreadful images sliced into my head. The ache was so jarring that it made me push Simon away so violently that I lost my balance. But Simon was fast and he caught me before my body hit the ground.
Heavy rain. A silhouette of a man running in my direction. dazzling light. People wearing masks. The awful sound of someone mockingly laughing at me—
“Astrid!” He called my name over and over. His jaw tightened as he carried me back to the car.
“It hurts!” I screamed as I clawed at my head, hoping to ease a little of the aching but it didn’t. “God! Simon! It hurts so bad!”
“I know! I know, Pumpkin. I’ll drive you home now.” I felt his lips on my forehead after he put me down gently on the passenger seat and quickly went to the driver’s seat to drive us home.
That night, Simon didn’t left my side and just watched me as I slept beside him. Kathleen was so worried that even she didn’t get enough sleep.
The next morning, Simon told me that I had to meet someone.
He told me she was my sister.
- Writer
