Paper Planes

Kabanata 21

KABANATA 21

"Ah, here it is!" Rekka exclaimed a few minutes after he said he would show me some pictures of his cousins. We were at the hills near the orphanage and I was already halfway through my painting when he opened the topic about them. Excited, he immediately went to my side, extending his hand as he presented his phone to me.

My brush hung midair as I turned to face him. He was smiling from ear to ear like usual. His black orbs were twinkling in excitement, like how the stars in the darkest night do as they shoot across the sky and seemingly fall unto earth to fulfill man's wishes. And like usual, my face didn't mirror these expressions as I stared at him void of anything.

"Look here!" He said as he pointed something on the screen of his phone and my blue ones idly followed, "You already knew Daisuke so there's no use introducing him," he said when my eyes lingered a bit on that person, one who, I knew very well, was strongly against me.

"These are his sons, Yuujin and Yuuhan," he said, pointing to the two boys standing on that person's right side. They were both taller than their father, with Yuuhan probably the tallest of them.

"As you well know, Yuujin and I are of the same age. We went to the same school since kindergarten, same classes, same hobbies, same circle of friends. But as you can see, I am taller than him, stronger, much talented, and above all... far more handsome!" He boasted as he poised himself like a model in some mint commercial I've once seen on TV, "You don't agree with me?" He asked, after a while, with a sad expression when he saw my blank face.

While it's true that of the two, he was the more endowed when it came to handsomeness, but I wouldn't tell him that. So to avoid answering, I returned my gaze at the picture on his phone. He seemed to have caught on because I heard him clear his throat before he continued introducing the rest.

"Yuuhan is two years younger than us. He doesn't talk much and tends to be shy around people. While his older brother is capable with handling people, he, on the other hand, is very adept with farming and agriculture, something that Yuujin is not very fond of unless he's eating them," he let out a soft laugh before continuing.

"You remember Kyosuke? These are his sons," he said pointing at the two younger boys on the other side of the picture, "The taller one is his eldest, Kyoshiro. He's turning fourteen this July. He's very good with guns and is considered a Judo prodigy by the Masters. He has actually defeated his seniors for the National Judo competition in Japan," there was pride in his voice when he said that and somewhere in the depths of my stone cold heart, I felt a tinge of that bitter feeling, which I, instinctively and instantly, dismissed, "He said he hopes to be part of a force that defeats the bad guys. I told him he doesn't have to join anything to be able to do that, that he can be that force if he wanted to."

For a while, I lingered my eyes on that boy, wondering how a child like him could dream of something so noble, something that even the adults could barely accomplish.

"And the small one beside him is his younger brother, Akira."

When I transferred my gaze to the mentioned person, for a second, I thought I saw a girl. But when I looked closely, I could see his resemblance to his father.

"Akira is just a year younger than Kyoshiro but because of his small physique, he appears to be much younger. Of us, he's the sickly one, the one who always needs special attention. You know, there was this time when he nearly died because of exhaustion."

I looked at his pretty image and thought how lucky he was to be born a male despite his feminine appearance. I wished that was also the case for me.

"Although they were only a year apart, Kyoshiro and Akira doesn't seem to get along very well. Kyoshiro is rough around the edges while Akira is... hmm... more into the softer side, I guess. Because of this, Kyoshiro finds it hard to relate to his little brother and vice versa," I heard him say, "But Akira is very fond of Yuujin. That's for sure! The little boy seems a little scared around me. I don't know why. I've always been nice to him," he added while scratching the back of his head like it was such a mystery to him.

I guessed his strong presence must have intimidated the boy. Maybe he saw gentleness with this Yuujin person.

"So..." I heard him say as he squared his shoulders, "Who do you think is the best among the five of us?" He asked, his brows rising and falling comically.

I blankly stared at him for two seconds before returning my eyes to the half-finished canvas.

"It's me, isn't it?" He laughed as he went over to the front, blocking the view that I was trying to recreate, "I'm the best! I'm the greatest! I'm the King of the world!" He yelled. His words echoed all over the hills that the birds on their trees woke from their afternoon rest and dotted the clear sky.

When he turned to me, his face flushed with delight, I thought that he was the brightest thing in this universe, that nothing could definitely dim this person's light. He returned to me, his smile as wide as the ocean, and fondly ruffled my rosegold hair.

"And you will always be our Princess, Arianne... My Princess," he tenderly said, "One day you'll get to meet all four of them and they will love you. They will see how lucky I am to have you. They will be envious for sure, especially Yuujin, that bastard... He told me I was lying when I told him about you. He will be very surprised when he sees you. I bet he'd be speechless," he laughed, "I have the most beautiful Princess in the world," he paused as his black orbs warmly gazed upon my blue ones.

I avoided his eyes as I tried to focus on the view in front and continued my painting.

"Of course, you'll like them, too. They're great guys, as well. Though not as great as I am," he laughed once more, "But out of the four, I'd say you'll probably get along with Akira best. Your age gap isn't too big and you share the same set of talents when it comes to art."

My hand stopped midair once more when I heard his opinion. I turned to him and saw him swiping his phone for more pictures. When he saw me looking, he turned his phone to me and showed me a smiling picture of that boy.

"I bet you'll be the best of friends right off the bat," he confidently added.

I woke as a start and saw the unfinished painting of a night sky on my ceiling. I sat up and went over the memory I've seen on my sleep. It's been months since I last dreamt of Rekka. Maybe the small piece of paper I received yesterday triggered the memory.

Unsheathe your sword for I will. Blood shall spill... It said. Sigurado akong iyong tao lang iyon ang posibleng sumulat noon. He must have hated me this much to challenge me to a duel that would spill blood.

Isang marahang katok ang nagpabalik sa akin sa kasalukuyan. Pagkatapos, dahan-dahan itong bumukas bago sumungaw sa pagitan nito ang nakangiti naming tagapangalaga.

"Good morning po, Lady Aya. Handa na po ang agahan."

"Pakisabi po, Kuya Milo, na bababa na ako. Marami pong salamat."

"Okay po," anito bago marahang isinara ang pinto para muli akong mapag-isa.

I picked up the family photo that was sitting on my side table. I remembered the very day we took this in front of that old Sakura tree inside the main estate. The twins were so happy to be reunited with their father, they were still all over him as the photographer took the picture.

I finally got the chance to experience having a family. Pero siguro nga masyado lang akong sakim para humiling ng higit pa.

As long as your breathing, we will always be miserable! I took a deep breath as the familiar pain materialized in my chest at the memory.

For the longest time, I've always relied on other people's protection. I've been running away from the pain. I've been avoiding full confrontation as much as I can, thinking I could never survive their whole opinion of me.

Cursed one!

Witch!

It would have been better if you have died.

You will never be enough!

I will never acknowledge you! Get out!

Mariin kong ipinikit ang mata sa naalala. Huminga ako nang malalim at dahan-dahang ibinuga ang hangin, calming my disturbed heart. Perhaps it's time I step out of my comfort zone and set aside my fears to fight for my right to exist. Maybe it's time I start facing my own demons.

"Good morning!" Maligaya kong bati sa mag-anak ni Gene. Nakaupo na ang lahat sa kani-kanilang puwesto sa hapag-kainan habang inilalapag ni Kuya Milo ang huling putahe.

Tumayo si Gene para salubungin ako.

"Good morning, my precious daughter! Ang ganda yata ng gising natin, a!" Nakangising tugon nito bago ako niyakap nang mahigpit.

"Masaya lang kasi makakalaro ko na naman ang kambal!" Sabi ko at pagkatapos ay pinuntahan si Rei at Gun na nagsitawanan matapos kong pinagyayapos sa yakap.

Ilang sandali ko pa silang niyakap nang mahigpit, savouring their warmth. Bigla ko na lang naisip na baka iyon na ang huling yakap ko sa kanila. I swallowed the invisible lump in my throat as I gave them another playful squeeze.

"Mahal na mahal ko kayo," I said in pure joy before releasing both of them. They giggled at what I said before attacking me for another hug.

"I love you, too, Aya-neechan," malambing na tugon ni Rei.

"Gun, too, Aya-nee. Gun loves Aya-neechan very much!" Deklara naman ng kapatid.

"Oy! Oy! Magseselos na si Daddy, a!" Narinig kong anas ni Gene bago naramdaman ang mainit na yakap nitong nilulukob kaming tatlo, "Daddy loves you very, very much!" Proklama nito habang magiliw kaming inuugoy.

"Daddy, you're so heavy!" Reklamo ni Gun.

"Mama's sad. Nobody loves Mama."

Natigil ang lahat nang marinig ang sinabi ni Mimi. She feigned a frown before covering her face and pretended to be crying. Mabilis namang nagsilipatan iyong kambal para akapin ang kanilang ina.

"Don't cry, Mama. We love you," alo ni Rei.

"Of course, Mimi, Daddy loves you very, very much!" Sabi naman ni Gene matapos lapitan at yakapin ang natatawa ng asawa. Sandali siyang tumigil at bumaling sa aking pwesto.

"Aya, anak, hindi mo ba mahal si Mama?" Nakangisi nitong tanong.

"At si Daddy?" Pahabol naman ng asawa nito.

I looked at them and my heart couldn't help but swell in happiness. It constricted inside its cage that it hurt. Hindi ko akalaing sumasakit din pala ang dibdib mo sa sobrang saya. Marahil dahil sa takot na baka bukas-makalawa, bigla na lang itong maglahong lahat.

I smiled sweetly as I ran towards them to be engulfed with their embrace.

"Daisuki," I said, grateful that I did. If the duel doesn't end well for me, at least they know fully well how much I love them.

It was the morning of that Monday when a familiar black van stopped in front of me. The doors opened and a uniformed butler greeted me with a shallow bow.

"Miss Moritake, our Master is waiting for you," he said before directing me inside the empty van.

I swallowed hard as I steadied my shaken nerves.

Matapos ang ilang sandali, tumango ako nang marahan. The butler stepped aside to let me in. As soon as he closed the door, our vehicle immediately drove away.

So, today is the day, huh? Of all days, he chose this special day for our duel. I sighed as I recalled how Rekka described him to me. If you could only see him now, I bet you won't recognize him anymore, I thought as I saw the familiar Sakura trees and that sturdy wooden gate. It's been two years since I last stepped inside this place.

"Please proceed to the changing rooms, Miss Moritake. The Master said that you can wear your preferred colors," sabi ng isa sa mga naninilbihan.

Tumango ako sa sinabi nito. Pagkatapos, maharan itong yumuko at saka namaalam. When I went inside the changing room, I immediately saw the different sets of garments prepared for me to choose from. I chose the one that I thought would fit the occasion.

Once done, I stepped outside and found one of the servants waiting for me. He slightly bowed his head before extending his arm towards the opposite direction.

"The Master is already waiting for you at the designated room," he said.

Tumango ako at tinungo ang tinutukoy nitong silid. I could feel the rush of blood along my veins quickening each second as I neared those sliding doors. When I finally reached them, I paused for a while and took a very deep breath to calm my nerves.

Behind these doors is the man who hated me for living, for making his life miserable. I don't want him to suffer anymore. He deserves to be happy, too. I want him to experience the same happiness I found with Gene and his family. Pumasok sa isipan ko ang masasaya nilang mga mukha.

But I don't want to die just so he could be happy. Because if I do, Rei and Gun are going to be sad. Gene and Mimi would also be devastated. Rekka would also be disappointed. I paused as images of those emeralds being worried about me ran across my mind.

Hindi ako bumitaw kaya hindi ka rin bibitaw, Ayana! Walang bibitaw! Hindi naman nahiyang magsaya ang bata kong puso sa naalala. Kahit naman magulo ang isang iyon, sigurado akong magwawala iyon sa oras na malaman niyang patay na ako.

That's why I won't die today. I won't let this be my last. Not yet. I am not done reaching my goals yet. I thought as I slowly reached the handle of the door. I straightened my back, squared my shoulders and raised my chin up as I slid it to one side.

My opponent was sitting in the middle of room, eyes closed and hands resting on each of his knees. He opened his eyes when he heard me enter. Ilang sandali niyang pinagmasdan ang aking napiling suot.

"You took your time," anito bago dahan-dahang tumayo, "So, that's what you've decided to wear before you say goodbye to the living."

Kinuyom ko ang aking panga sa kanyang huling nabanggit.

"I am not dying today," I firmly told him.

"You think you have a chance to leave this place unscathed after this?" He hissed, "Gene won't be able to recognize your body once I'm done with you. I'll strike you and cut you to bits until my hatred is satisfied!" He yelled as he grabbed two swords from a table and threw one near my feet, "Pick it up and let's find out who among us is telling the truth."

I bet you'll be the best of friends right off the bat... I could hear Rekka saying.

I bit my lip as I bent down to pick up the sheathed sword. It felt heavy on my hands.

You've lost your bet this time, Rekka.