NO CHOICE /r18

PAIN

"Betrayal doesn't only break your heart but also darkens your soul. You'll never forget the pain like a fog that forever lingers in the depths of your mind."

They say, the worst mistake a man can make is to betray a woman who actually believed in his promises.

Pain is inevitable when you love. One wouldn't get hurt if she didn't care.

Mylene was consumed by different emotions...but mostly, pain...again.

And she hated herself for letting it to happen.

She should have known better than to believe his false promises.

She should have known better than to think their marriage has hope.

It was partly her fault. She believed him and his words at hinayaan nyang mahulog sya dito.

She remembered when she opened up to her friends last night about what she truly felt towards her husband now.

(Whatabouts last night  Mylene and her friends)

"Frenny, how's married life with Alex? " tanong ni Ann sa kanya.

Mylene didn't answer yet but  she smiled instead.

Oo nga, musta nga kaya ang buhay nya with Alex ngayon?

"Well, I'm getting used to it, actually. I enjoyed having him around, taking care of me. I realized it wasn't that bad naman pala after all ."

"Of course, who wouldn't be frenny. Eh gabi gabi mo ba namang katabi sa pagtulog ang isang Alexander Montreal, malamang na masaya at punong puno." pabirong sabi ni Ogie sa kanya.

"That's so good to hear dear. I just hope Alex had really changed his ways. You know what I mean." Rose suddenly said, her words felt like it was conveying a message for her.

Mylene suddenly remembered about what she and Alex talked about before...and she just have that need to explain his side to her friends.

So she told them what Alex had confessed to her.

"Rose, I understand why you chose not to tell me. As if I cared naman before di bah? But I hope next time, sabihin nyo kung ano man. Especially now that I am ready to accept him and to give my heart a chance to love again. And I really appreciate him telling me." she said.

"My, I'm really sorry for keeping it from you. I just don't want you to get hurt. I couldn't help but think that he is Alex Montreal! But really frenny, I'm sorry..." Rose told her guiltily.

"Basta, always remember na we are here for you kung ano man ang maging kahahantungan ng relasyon nyo. Just please, guard your heart. " Ann added.

Doc Ogie stood up to where he was sitting  at pinuntahan si Mylene at niyakap."Naku frenny, pag yan si Alex gagaguhin ka, ewan ko nalang!!!" Then he seriously looked at her. "Pero frenny, alalahanin mo. Si Alex Montreal yang napangasawa mo. Don't expect him to change overnight. Don't expect him to love you back. Don't expect him not to hurt you. So pag isipan mong mabuti yang nararamdaman mo. We know how strong you are...but we also know kung pano ka magmahal. All out ka, at kahit na ang pagiging Rivero mo ay kinakalimutan mo para sa taong mahal mo."

Mylene thought she is very lucky to have her friends. Tested and proven na ang samahan nila. Sila ang mga taong di na nya kelangan mag pretend what she truly feels.

Being  a Rivero is not all bed of roses. Indi lahat ng totoong bagay kaya ng pera.

Just like their friendship...

*****

Mylene remained stuck to where she was standing. Ramdam nya ang tensyon sa pagitan ni Alex at ng ama nya. She didn't know how to react dahil kahit sya, di rin alam ang nararamdaman.

But then, her emotions were also overwhelming her.

When she saw the videos and pictures of Alex and Jessica on social media and internet, di sya nabigla, or nagtaka nuong una.

It was like seeing Alex's pictures on the net when she stalked him bago sila kinasal.

But then, as she continued to watch the videos, what really bothered her is yung kirot sa kanyang puso. 

He remembered what Alex said nung nag-usap sila about  what happened to her and her x boyfriend.

She believed him.

"Ibahin mo ako.........

Pangako, di kita sasaktan...."

Those were Alex's exact words to her.

"Ibahin mo ako.........

Pangako, di kita sasaktan...."

So she held on to what he said. She opened her heart because she believed him ... of what he promised...

But now, he betrayed her too. She knew she didn't have to feel betrayed kasi parte ng kasunduan nila, walang pakialaman sa kani-kanilang personal na ganap.

But she felt that pain again...

The same pain she felt when Juancho betrayed her...

Parehong sakit, parehong lungkot ang nadarama nya.

Ang magkaiba lang ngayon, di na sya pwedeng umiwas...

Di sya na pwedeng tumakbo at umalis...

Kasi iba na ang sitwasyon nila.

Kasal na sila.

At mahirap man sa kanya, kelangan nyang harapin yun.

"Love..." she heard him say her name.

She heard his pleading voice when he called her name. She couldn't find her voice to say something especially when all eyes were on her, waiting for her to say something or to react to the situation. So she composed herself and forced a smile.

"I'm pretty sure Alex can fix that dad." she finally said looking at her father-in-law. Then she looked at Alex, "can't you, Alex?"

Alex just looked at her. He could hear the sarcasm in her voice but still she tried to defend him sa magulang nya.

Huminga ng malalim ang daddy nila.

"Ok, I'm giving you this day to fix and clean your mess young man. Huwag mo nang paabutin ito sa mga kaaway mo sa negosyo. They will use this against you and your credibility. Don't wait for it to go worse than it is right now. Swerte ka sa asawa mo at inintindi ka. Aalis na kami." his dad said.

Alex's mom hugged Mylene and whispered, "Thank you ija." and kissed her.

"Ate, kuya, we will go now." wika naman ni Alice sabay halik sa kanila.

When their parents and Alice left and the door closed, Mylene turned her back at Alex.

"My, let me explain...." Alex tried to grab her arms.

Hinarap sya ni Mylene nang wala pa ring  reaction, at tanging mga mata lang nya ang nagbibigay ng sagot.

Disappointment...

Betrayal...

And

Pain...

"No need to explain. The pictures say it all. Linisin mo yang kalat mo kagabi." and she turned her back again.

Pero Alex didn't let go of her.

He wanted to explain.

He wanted her to understand.

He wanted her to know.

Gago ka Alex! Anong "know what?" what do you want her to know? The truth? Na nakipag s*x ka sa iba??? Stupid!!!

"But love, wait. Can you hear me out first? Please... Wag ganito, pucha!!!" he pleaded.

Nag init ang tenga ni Mylene sa pagmumura ni Alex kaya't hinarap nya ulit ito.

"May nangyari sa inyo ng Jessicang yun kagabi, di bah? Kung bakit di ka nakauwi because you were with her, weren't you?" she sternly asked.

Alex just looked at her, not saying anything... but, he nodded his head confirming what she asked...

Tangina mo Alex!!!

Mylene hoped Alex will tell her it wasn't true.

She hoped he will deny it...

Sana sinabi nya na hinatid nya lang....

At walang nangyari, na nalasing lang sya ata nakitulog sa mga kaibogan kasi di na sya makauwi.

But NO, he confirmed it!

And his confirmation felt like a dagger stuck in her heart.

Masakit para sa kanya. Di man nya nakita yun but those pictures and videos could tell. She could imagine in her mind what they did!

Parang namumbalik ang damdaming pilit nyang kinalimutan ng isang taon.

Pero di nya kelangan ipakita yun kay Alex.

Di kelangang malaman ni Alex na nasasaktan sya...

Kahit na sa loob looban nya, nadududrog sya.

She tried to compose herself and smirked at him, saying, "Yun naman pala eh. Wala ka nang dapat ipaliwanag."

And with that, she took her bag and car keys and left their house.

*****

MYLENE

Tears were pooling in her eyes while she drove her car to the race track.

This is her only sanctuary.

Dito, nailalabas nya ang lahat ng galit at hinanakit nya sa dibdib.

Dito, nailalabas nya ang lahat ng sakit nang walang makakakita sa kanya.

She took Porsia to the track, at mabilis na pinatakbo...

160....180...200...220...

240kph

Hanggang sa umabot ng 260kph

At pwede pang bumilis... her Porsia can go beyond that. She could feel the speed, her heartbeat as she pushed on the pedal, challenging her limits... testing her control...

Di na nya alintana ang bilis, na sumubra na sya sa tinakdang speed limit ng track kung nagpa practice. Iilang tao na rin na andun sa race track and umakyat ng grand stand, hindi lang para panuurin sya pero nagbabantay rin sa gagawin pa nya. 

When she reached her 12th lap,

she heard the warning alarm and she saw the warning light, senyales ng monitor that she was going beyond the speed limit.

That was when she realized she was losing her self-control...

And that's not right. That's not her.

So she tuned the accelarator down. 

When she halted, that was when she broke down. 

Iniyak nya ang sakit.

Iniyak nya ang sarili.

Ramdam nya ang lumalabas na frustrations sa kanyang damdamin, at kahit papano, she felt better.

She then decided not to go home.

Kelangan nya ng oras para mag isip.

She needed time for herself.

Isa pa, di rin naman nya kayang harapin ulit si Alex sa bahay nila.

Not yet...

Not now...

So dumeretso sya sa kanyang penthouse. It has been so long since she was here. 

She had avoided this place because it brought her so many painful memories of what happened to her. 

This place also reminded her  kung gano sya naging tanga sa pagibig.

Di na sya nakapunta dito simula nang maghiwalay sila ni Juancho.

She found her penthouse still the same. she knew her mom kept it well maintained for her just in case she planned to go home here... in case she needed to be alone. Gaya ngayon.

Kompleto pa rin sa gamit, mga damit nya at toiletries. Yun nga lang, walang laman ang ref.

She'll fill it up later pag lumabas sya.

Ayaw nyang umuwi sa kanilang bahay. Ayaw nyang tanungin sya ng magulang or pag usapan ang tungkol sa nangyari.

She just wanted time for herself alone...

*****

ALEX

Nang umalis si Mylene, di na nya ito nagawang pigilan. He knew she needed to go.

Hahayaan na muna nya ang asawa. Babalik din yun mamaya at mag uusap sila. Kakausapin nya.

He called Jack para tulungan syang ayusin ang nasa social media.

"Bro, I need your help. Can you meet me now at Gorka? " he said.

"Alam ko na yan. Nakita ko na. Sure pare, on my way there now." sagot ng kaibigan.

Gorka is an afternoon bar owned by Alex's cousin at dito sila tumatambay kung gusto lang nila ng afternoon chill and drink. Napa cozy ng place na ito at makakapag usap ka talaga.

"Nag viral ka ngayun ah! Hahahha" bati ni Jack sa kanya sabay bigay ng baso ng scotch.

"Gago, yun na nga. I need your team of IT experts para dun." napabuntong hininga sya.

"Ang lalim nyan bro. Ganyan kalala? Alam ba ni Mylene?" tanong ni Jack.

"Oo bro, at nila dad... Andun sila sa bahay kanina..... Pucha pare, ang gago ko! Ba't ko ba hinayaang mangyari yun??? Nadale ko ulit si Jessica kagabi pare!!!"

"Oh, so anong sabi?"

"Syempre nagalit si dad. "

"Alam ko na yan bro. I mean ang asawa mo. Anong sabi ng asawa mo?"

Napabuntong hininga ulit si Alex. "Walang sinabi."

Tumawa si Jack habang umiling ang ulo. "Oh di ayos pala! Wala palang problema sa asawa mo. Yung kay tito madaling masolusyunan yan. Give me an hour at mati take-down na yan ng team ko." dagdag pa ni Jack

"Yun na nga bro, wala syang sinabi... I mean si Mylene...I expected her to blow up or kaya'y magalit, or umiyak, or murahin ako... Kaso wala. " sabi ni Alex as he shrugged his shoulders.

"Pucha bro ang swerte mo! Hahaha!!!  Maganda na't mayaman, mabait pa pala!!"

Alex took a deep breath again, trying to decipher what Jack said at iniisip ang situation nya.

"Pero atin atin lang to bro ha, iba yung pakiramdam ko eh. I saw it in her eyes na nasaktan sya at nagi-guilty ako!"

"Huy, Alex, ikaw ba yan???? Kelan ka ba naging concern sa damdamin ng mga babae mo? Kilala kita bro, you wouldn't care! Arranged marriage lang yung sa inyo. May kasunduan kayo ni Mylene, at siguro nga, she was just keeping her part to that deal."

Di sumagot si Alex sa sinabi ni Jack pero ramdam ng kaibigan ang kakaibang iniisip nito. Malalim ang iniisip at nagulat si Jack sa reaction nya.

Dati naman kasi, walang pakialam si Alex kung may masaktan sya or what...pero iba ngayon...

Granted na asawa nya si Mylene, pero andun si Jack when they made a  truce. Witness pa nga sila ng best friend ni Mylene na si Ann, di ba?

He was there when both of them agreed na walang pakialamanan sa sariling ganap. Si Mylene pa ang nag suggest nun! So anong nangyayari ngayun??

"Wait, wait, wait bro... May hindi ba ako nalalalaman? Don't tell me you are falling for her! Hahaha" Jack jokingly said. "But no, no, no. That's not possible because if you fell for her, if you are in love with Mylene now, di mo sana dinale si Jessica."

Alex remained quiet at tiningnan lang ang kaibigan.

"s**t bro!!! Di nga???" gulat na sambit ni Jack.