“So hindi na pala poproblemahin ang sasakyan next week”
“Yup! he voluntareed himself daw”
Nagising ako sa usapan nila Cathy and Dale at dahil na rin sa amoy na kinakain nila. Kinuha ko ang phone ko to check if he has a message ba, but to disappoint myself wala.
Pati na rin kagabi, I clearly said to him bago bumaba sa sasakyan niya to chat me If he already got home. But yeah hanggang sa nakatulog ako wala siyang message.
It's already 6:30 in the morning kaya tumayo na ako at para makapag-ayos na rin for school.
“Nagising na rin ang prinsesa” pang-aasar ang bungad sa akin ni Cathy nang makalabas ako sa pinto ng kwarto namin.
I just look her with my death glare at kita ko si Dale ay pigil na pigil sa kanyang pagtawa I ignored them at dumiretso na ako sa banyo para magkapaghilamos.
“Mukha kang sabog Dan,” patuloy na pang-aasar niya sa akin kaya napatingin ako ng maigi sa salamin “sana tamang tao ‘yang pinagpupuyatan mo” di ko na lang siya pinansin, buti na lang hindi sumakit ang tiyan ko sa katerbang calamares na nilaklak ko kagabi.
“Saan ba kayo gumora kagabi Dan?” this time si Dale na ang nagtanong.
“Huh? Naalala mo Cathy?” gulat kong tanong sa kanya nang makalabas ako sa banyo at nagningning ang mga mata ko noong dumako ang tingin sa lamesa, nice may sunnyside up na itlog.
“Oo naman,” she response
“Kala ko nananaginip ka lang kagabi” natawa kong sabi saka inayos ang upuan sa kanyang tabi para makakain at agad kong kinuha ang itlog, from my peripheral view kita ko si Dale na natawa nanaman.
“Diyan lang kami sa Park” alam kong naghihintay sila ng sagot kaya binigyan ko na sila at matigil na rin.
“Park lang pala, lumayo pa kayo meron naman diyan sa subdivision” masyado akong busy kumakain kaya tumango-tango na lang ako kay Cathy para mas lalo siyang mainis.
“Alam mo Cathy kailangan mo na rin ng kalandian, tigil tigilan mo na panenermon mo kay Dan” pagtatanggol naman sa akin ni Dale kaya tumayo ako sa kinauupuan ko and I gave him a back hug at binelatan si Cathy no make her more annoyed.
“Alam mo Dale sana ma-late ka sa first subject mo” ganti naman niya at dumiretso na sa kwarto
“f**k past 7 na pala” dali-dali namang tumayo si Dale at inayos ang sarili para makaalis.
“Ingat Dale! Love you!” pahabol kong sabi sa kanya habang nag-aayos ng aming pinagkain and He just give me flying kiss.
Buti na lang 9 am pa ang class namin ni Cathy. I sneak a sight from my phone na nasa lamesa but again wala pa ring notification from him.
"kanina ka pa tingin ng tingin sa phone mo ah?" nagulat ako nang biglang magsalita si Cathy kaya mabilis ko itong itinago "ghinost ka na ba niya?" natatawang dagdag pa niya.
Napa-sigh na lamang ako. Kagabi pa ako naghihintay ng message niya and now i just message him again na 'good morning' pero wala pa rin. Maybe busy ulit mga CE kaya kahit isang chat hindi niya magawa.
Or maybe he just doesn't care at ako lang ang nag iisip na big deal lang ito. Oh my god i'm being too paranoid na naman.
"Hindi naman, maybe he just forgot to text me" said that to defend him.
"Don't too be attached Dan" Cathy is being serious and I'm scared.
"It looks like na he's not being serious sayo, because if he is, kagabi pa lang nag-message na sayo iyan" dagdag pa na sermon na niya.
Tumingin na lang ako sa bintana ng jeep para umiwas ng tingin kay Cathy because all the things that she said are all facts.
"Guard your heart Daniel" I don't know why pero natawa ako kay Catherine, she's being too serious about my fling life and that's why I love her even more.
"Yes, po mommy" I hug her after I said it.
Pagbaba namin sa jeep, I do not know why my heart is beating so loud. Thinking that any moment pwede kaming magkita o magkasalubong ni Mika because we are both Engineering students, and if that happens, I don't know how to react.
8:55 is what i saw on the clock after entering the AH building kung saan kami magkaklase ilang hakbang na lang at nasa classroom na kami but the man who I never imagine being encountered today will just pop up suddenly bago pa kami makadating ni Cathy sa respected room namin.
Kaya before pa tumingin si Mika sa harapan i immediately grab Cathy’s hand para tumalikod at maglakad pabalik taking the long way, iikot kami para hindi namin makasalubong sila Mika.
"Anong trip mo Daniel Hope?" naguguluhan na tanong sa akin ni Cathy.
"Basta maglakad ka na lang ng mabilis Catherine" lakad takbo ang ginagawa namin ngayon. Mukha 'mang tanga but i can't really face him right now.
Kaya kahit ma-late sa first subject i'm willing to take the long way at ikotin ang buong building para hindi lang ako makita ni Mika.
Wala namang kahit anong tanong naglakad na lang din si Cathy ng mabilis because our professor is probably started discussing now.
"Siguraduhin mong mag-eexplain ka sa akin mamaya" nasa harapan na kami ng room ngayon ngayon and we compose ourselves bago pumasok.
"Yeah surely" assuring her para matigil na siya.
An hour and a half na siguro ang nakakalipas and i'm still distracted about sa nangyari kanina. Hindi ako makapagfocus sa discussion.
What if he saw me kanina panicking? Ano iisipin niya? He probably thinks na big deal lahat sa akin, napailing na lang ako imagining that thought.
"Miss Valencia"
He will be going to message me kaya mamaya? What will i say kapag oo? Paano kapag nag-aya siya mamaya?
"Miss Valencia"
Papayag ba ako? Anong pag-uusapan namin mamaya—
Not realizing that I'm being too deep in my thoughts sinipa na ako ni Cathy that makes me back to reality kaya napatingin ako sa kanya and too much embarassment kanina pa tinatawag ng professor namin ang surname ko para makuha ang attention ko.
"Miss Valencia you're present physically but you are mentally absent" disappointed is what really written on his face while saying it.
"I'm so sorry sir" sagot ko habang nakatayo… Damn Daniel snap it out what is happening to you.
"So, what is the first thing that you need to consider for you to solve a circuit using a Superposition theorem?”
“The first step Sir is to turn off or suppress all but one input.” Kinakabahan na sagot ko, buti na lang at nagbasa ako ng notes kagabi.
“Correct Miss Valencia,” tumalikod na ang professor namin kaya umupo na ako “next time pay more attention when I’m discussing, huwag ka mag-alala mahal ka ‘nun” biro pang sabi niya at narinig ko namang nagtawanan ang mga kaklase ko.
Damn… gusto ko na lang na lamunin ako ng lupa ngayon. And when I gazed at Cathy’s position, she looks so disappointed in me.
Nagpatuloy ang discussion at nag-focus na lamang ako sa lesson namin. One embarrassment for this day is enough.
We are already going to somewhere to eat some lunch, at hindi pa rin ako pinapansin ni Cathy. Hindi na rin ako masyadong conscious about sa paligid ko, I don’t care anymore kung magkasalubong kami ni Mika.
I disappoint Cathy today and that makes me sad. She’s literally ignoring me right now. Naglalakad siya sa harapan ko at nasa likuran niya ako. I am too scared of her.
“Where do you want to eat?” I flinched when I heard her ask me.
“Kahit saan” naglakad ako ng mabilis para makasabay sa kanya, sumulyap ako sa kanya para makita kung galit pa rin siya and she is still serious.
Jollibee, kung nasaan kami ngayon. Hindi ko na alam kung sino nag-decide basta ang alam ko sinundan ko na lang si Cathy. But that is okay because I’m suddenly craving for Jollibee’s spaghetti.
Hindi pa rin niya ako Kinakausap, naiwan ako ngayon dito sa table namin at si Cathy na ang nag-order para sa amin.
She surely knows naman kung ano ang gusto ko. But for now, mas iintindihin ko muna kung paano ako mag eexplain. Damn, it’s been a years ago since naging ganito ako. And I know Cathy is just being too worried for me.
“What happened to you?” tapos na kaming kumain ngayon and I’m f*****g nervous right now. Cathy is already questioning me. Mas nakakakaba pa ito kesa sa recitation namin sa Circuits.
“Nothing” nakayuko kong sagot, umaasang matakasan ang pang-qquestion niya sa akin.
“Are you sure?” napaayos naman ako ng upon ang marinig ko siya. She sounds so worried, and I know why.
“Yeah, I will sort things on my own,” humarap ako sa kanya to meet her gaze “don’t worry Cathy I got this.” as I reach for her hands to assure her.
“You trust me, right?” dagdag ko pang tanong sa kanya.
“Of course,” sagot naman niya and I smiled at her.
“Thank you” and she also does.
Naglalakad na kami pabalik sa EB to attend our afternoon class. We are okay now ni Cathy, it’s not that she’s underestimating me nor she’s overacting, she is just being worried that the past may happen again.
I need to set my mind again because obviously, I am the only one who thinks that all of the things that are happened do have meaning. Too dumb of me to assume it. I have no choice but to play along with him if that is what he wants.
We saw Dale busy working on their activity, we just waved at him because we know that they still have a lot of things to do, maybe he is also busy that’s why he can’t even send me a message.
Oh! come on Daniel you just said a while ago that you will not think about him anymore, sabay kurot ko sa sarili ko, saka naman napatingin sa akin si Cathy with her confuse face, kaya nginitian ko na lang siya.
While waiting for our professor tumunganga lang ako listening to some music habang nakatingin sa bintana. Cathy is busy talking to our classmates. Ka-close ko naman mga kaklase ko, wala lang talaga ako sa mood makipag usap ngayon.
I shifted my eyes on the door of our classroom because I think someone is staring at me and hindi nga ako nagkamali, Mika is there with our College Governor talking to our President. Tinitigan ko lang siya with my no emotion face at umiwas ng tingin.
I just ignore him and put my phone on high volume para maiwasan ang pag-iisip, and Cathy is also staring at me because I know she knows who is there.
Bakit kung parang kailan iniiwasan ko siya at ayaw ko siya makita, saka naman lagi siyang sumusulpot kung nasaan ako. I do not know anymore… there are so much to process for this day. I am tired.
“Hintayin daw natin si Dale.” We are at the front of the university waiting for the jeep.
“Okay” walang gana kong sabi, gusto ko na lang humilata sa kama ngayon.
“Mika! Sasabay ka ba samin?” putangina, the moment I heard his name napamura na lang ako.
“Hindi na Dawn, puntahan ko muna si Trinits.” Nagpatuloy lang ako sa pakikinig they are still talking, we are only a meter a way from them, kaya itinago ko ang sarili kay Cathy.
Pinaglalaruan nga ata talaga ako ng tadhana, sa araw pa talaga na’to ilang beses ko siyang Nakita.
“Jowa yarn?” rinig kong pang sabi ng isa sa mga kaibigan niya.
“Sana nga dre, kayalang hindi eh” saka sila nagtawanan pagkatapos ito sabihin ng isa pa nilang kasama. I don’t know what expression Mika’s he has made but to confirm my thoughts he really has someone he like huh.
Mas lalo ko pang isiniksik ang sarili ko kay Cathy, she didn’t say anything, but I know that she knows something.
Kaya the moment na may pumaradang jeep sa harapan namin agad na naman niya akong hinila para sumakay dito. Ignoring the fact that Mika and his friends can saw us.
Gusto kong umiyak I feel so pathetic. This is why I hate myself I’m being too emotional about things na lahat ng nasa surroundings ko ay naapektuhan. Damn
“Stop chatting that guy Daniel” I just nod at her when she said that. I knew she is also listening to their conversation earlier.
“Oh crap! Nalimot natin si Dale” natawa na lang ako dahil pareho kaming nadala sa sitwasyon kanina kaya nakalimutan namin kung bakit pala kami naghihintay kanina.
“Just chat him, he’ll understand naman” chika lang naman katapat ni Dale. “Masyado ka kasing nadala ng emotion mo” biro ko pang dagdag to light the mood.
“Seriously?” with her face na hindi makapaniwala na siya pa ang sinasabihan ko nang ganon. Cathy is so cute I love her so much.