Tracing Heartbeats

CHAPTER 4

Hindi ko alam kung paano ako mag re-react sa sinabi nitong lalaking kasalukuyang katabi ko sa magarang kotse na ‘to. Ni hindi ko nga alam ang pangalan nito eh. Pero bahala na, hindi man lang ako nakapagpalit ng damit o nakapag paalam kay Aila.

“Hey,” he took a glance at me.

I leaned my head at the windshield as I was looking outside and listening at the music being played.

“Hmm?” I looked at him.

“So, how’s Kaii at school?” he asked as he laughed softly.

This man is really taking my soft heart from his soft chuckles.

“Well, okay naman so far. Ang talino niya nga eh,” I proudly said.

“You must like him that much?” He asked as he focused his attention on the road.

I don’t know what to say.

“Hindi naman dahil matalino or pogi siya. I just like him the way he is,” I smiled at the thought that I was crazy in love with him sending those love letters.

He nodded and half shrugged.

“You shouldn’t be with Kaii for too long. That would be risky for the both of you,” his voice sounded concerned.

“Why? Ngayon ko pa nga lang siya nakakasama. Hindi naman ako niya kinakausap or hindi naman kami masyado nagkikita dahil nagtatago ako,” I laughed.

Napahawak ako sa bibig ko nang ma-realized na napa lakas ang tawa ko.

“What?” He couldn’t believe what I just told him.

“Why were you hiding from him?” He asked as he softly chucked.

“Kasi naman!” I pouted and crossed my arms.

Namumula na yata ang pisngi ko dahil sa mga sinasabi ko sa lalaking ‘to.

“Natatakot kasi ako na baka pag nalaman niya, eh magagalit siya sa akin,” Ngumiwi ako at napabuntong-hininga na lang.

Tinawanan niya lang ako at umiling.

“Bakit mo ako tinatawanan?” I raised a brow and was trying to warn him.

“I didn’t know you’re capable of hiding! Ang ingay mo kaya,” he shook his head and smiled.

“Would Kaii be turned off about me, being loud?” Nilapit ko ang mukha ko sa kaniya habang inuusisa siya.

“You’re cute,” he just said.

Pinanliitan ko lang siya ng mata.

“Ano nga kasi!” Pag pupumilit ko.

“Well, you I told you already. Just be yourself. You don’t need to impress him, to like you,” he took a glance at me and smiled.

“Alam ko! Gusto ko lang naman iwasan ‘yung mga bagay na ayaw niya,” I replied as I lean my head again to the windshield.

Inabot kami ng halos bente minutos nang makarating sa Mall.

“Anong gagawin natin dito?” Tanong ko sa kaniya habang pinagmamasdan siyang tinatanggal ang seatbelt niya.

“Secret, malalaman mo rin,” he smiled and winked.

Pinanliitan ko lang siya ng mata at umiling saka tinanggal ang seatbelt ko.

Nang makapasok na kami ay medyo dumidistansya ako sa kaniya dahil baka mamaya ay may makakita sa amin, issue na naman ‘to sa school.

Tanging phone lang ang dala ko at naka short lang ako at v-neck na white shirt at naka tsinelas lang ako.

Nakakahiya namang tumabi sa kaniya ‘no! Amoy mayaman tapos didikit ako sa kaniya? Duh? Look at me? Nakapambahay lang, wala pang pera na dala.

Napahinto ako sa paglalakad nang makita siyang huminto.

Tinitigan ko lang din siya.

“Bilisan mo, anong oras na,” mahinang sabi niya sa akin.

“Eh, sige na. Maglakad ka na, nakasunod naman ako sa’yo eh. Nakakahiya kasi, nakapambahay lang ako.”

Paliwanag ko habang sinasabayan niya akong maglakad.

I thought he would tell me anything but he grabbed my arms instead and quickly went to the department store.

“Anong ginagawa natin dito?” Tanong ko sa kaniya habang palingon lingon siya sa likod namin.

Hindi niya ako sinagot at tinitigan lang niya ako saka pinatong ang shades sa mata ko. Habang siya naman ay nag suot ng cap at shades. Agad kaming nagtungo sa counter para magbayad. Hinayaan ko lang siya at hindi na lang ako nagsalita.

“Wear that, my mom’s here. She would really kill me if he saw me here,” he whispered and grabbed my arms again after paying for everything.

Nang makalayo na kami sa kinaroroonan namin kanina, ay naisipan kong magsalita.

“Bakit ka ba nagtatago sa nanay mo?” Natatawang tanong ko sa kaniya habang naglalakad sa ladies section ng mga damit.

Bigla naman siyang umupo sa maliit na sofa at natatawang tinitigan ako.

“You wouldn’t like to know it anyway,” he shook his head and crossed his legs.

I was about to speak when a sales lady approached us.

“Sir, para po ba kay ma’am?”

The sales lady politely asked.

I was standing in front of this man that I don’t even know his name.

He just smiled and nodded.

I gave him the no Idea look but he just shrugged.

“Wala akong pera,” nilapitan ko siya at binulungan.

“It’s on me, go and find your dress. I just wanted to help you out,” his soft voice caught me.

I was really hesitant to accept it but he insisted.

How can I even pay for him?

Sinundan ko lang ang sales lady hanggang sa makarating kami sa isang room na puno ng magaganda at mamahaling damit.

I’m really dead now. Mukhang hindi na talaga ako kakain nito sa school para mabayaran lang ang damit na ‘to.

I went to the dressing room and took all the dresses that the sales lady handed me.Isinarako ang pinto at natigilan ako nang makita ang sarili sa salamin.

Look at me, unattractive and look like trash.

Bulong ko sa sarili ko at kumawala ng buntong hininga.

Nagsukat ako ng damit hanggang sa napili ko na iyong pinaka mura na kaya ko lang bayaran.

Inayos ko ang sarili ko bago tuluyang lumbas sa dressing room.

‘Yung lalaking kasama ko kanina ay kasalukuyang nakayuko habang pinipindot ang cellphone niya.

I cleared my throat trying to get his attention.

He looked at me without even blinking. I gulped at the thought that this dress isn’t really for me.

“Pangit ba? Ito na kasi ‘yung pinakamura eh. I couldn’t afford to buy an expensive one,” I shyly said, looking down.

He chuckled.

“Was the dress you’re wearing the cheapest?” he asked.

I bit my lip and nodded.

“Alam ko naman na hindi bagay sa akin. Sabi ko naman sa’yo wala akong pambayad eh,”

I sighed.

“No,” he disagreed.

Nag-angat ako ng tingin.

“Ha?” Napakamot ako sa ulo dahil sa sinabi niya.

“You’re beyond gorgeous!” he mumbled as he walked in my direction.