Detoxify

Chapter 13

Picture

Avery's Point of View

Dahil sa sinabi ni Elliot, parang nag-reset lahat ng sistema ng katawan ko. Alam mo 'yung feeling na biglang nag-brownout tapos nagbalik 'yung kuryente pero flickering pa? Ganun. Ang dami kong gustong sabihin pero wala akong mahanap na proper words. I wanted to tell him straight na kaibigan ko lang talaga si Tyron, pero paano? Wala naman akong obligasyon na magpaliwanag sa kanya. Hindi ko rin siya pag-aari, so bakit parang kailangan kong i-clear 'yung pangalan ko?

Napahilot ako sa sentido habang naglalakad papunta sa banyo. Tsk. Avery, get yourself together. Para kang... hindi ikaw. Parang ang dali mong maapektuhan ng mga hirit niya. Not a good sign.

Agad akong naligo para at least mabawasan 'yung tension sa dibdib ko. The water was cold, halos ice level, pero hindi ko na pinansin. Mas okay na 'to kaysa 'yung pinapawisan ka pero mainit din ulo mo. Kaya lang, habang dumadaloy 'yung tubig sa mukha ko, parang naririnig ko pa rin 'yung boses niya sa utak ko. "May gusto ka lang kay Tyron kaya pinagtatanggol mo siya." Paulit-ulit. Paulit-ulit. Jusko, parang may echo na naka-loop.

Pinilit kong i-shampoo nang mabilis ang buhok ko para matapos na, pero hindi ko magawang huwag mag-isip. Do I even like Tyron that way? No. I mean... no, right? We've been okay friends, comfortable to talk to, pero romantic feelings? Hindi naman. Pero bakit parang iba ang tono ng hirit ni Elliot? Bakit parang... may kasamang meaning na hindi ko mabasa?

Pagkababa ko, nakita ko sila sa dining table. Tahimik. As in, walang kumakain na nagsasalita. The only sound was the clinking of utensils sa plato. Napabuntong-hininga na lang ako. This dorm really has its silent tension moments.

"Bye, y'all. I'll go na," sabi ko habang inaayos 'yung bag ko. No one made an effort to start small talk. They all just gave a small nod, except si Edward na biglang tumayo, parang may naalala.

"Wait, let's go together, Avery," sabi niya in English, diretso at matter-of-fact, habang mabilis na kinuha 'yung bag niya. Hindi siya 'yung tipong nag-aalok lang for the sake of courtesy — it felt more like a decision he already made.

Tumango lang ako at lumabas muna. I waited sa labas ng dorm habang nilalabas niya 'yung kotse niya. The air was cooler than I expected, pero hindi nakatulong sa pag-calm ng utak ko. Hindi ako mapakali. My mind was like, ang daming open tabs and lahat about Elliot, Tyron, and kung anong trip ng buhay ko right now. Pero wala pa ring sagot. Wala akong alam kung worth it bang magtanong pa or just... let it slide.

"Tara," yaya ni Edward habang binubuksan niya ang passenger door. May ngiti siyang konti, 'yung tipong 'di naman pilit pero hindi rin sobra. Umupo na ako sa loob ng kotse, inhaling that clean-leather scent, hoping the short ride would clear my head. Pero deep down, I knew... kahit saan kami magpunta, dala ko pa rin yung gulo sa isip ko.

Habang nagda-drive si Edward, ako naman ay nakasandal sa upuan, busy scrolling sa phone ko. May naisip ako bigla dahil perfect lighting ngayon sa loob ng kotse, kaya nag-selfie ako. Two snaps lang, tapos upload agad sa IG stories. Wala pang dalawang minuto, may nagpa-pop up na heart reacts at comments. Ang bilis talaga ng mga tao sa chism— este, sa pag-appreciate.

"Ang ganda mo riyan sa picture na 'yan," biglang sabi ni Edward, eyes still on the road pero kita ko 'yung slight smile sa labi niya. Medyo kinilig ako, I mean, sino ba naman ako para hindi ma-flatter?

"Thank you, Edward," sagot ko, soft pero may bahid ng saya sa boses ko.

Pero ayun na nga. After ng sweet na moment, bigla niyang dinagdagan, "Kaso nga lang, medyo sablay 'yung framing. Dapat kasi pantay ang space sa gilid. Unless may subject kang sinasadya. Tsaka, against the light pa, medyo blurred." Naka-tono pa siya na parang lecturer sa Photography 101.

Napakunot-noo ako nang slight. Wait lang... bakit parang ang technical ng approach niya? Hindi ito 'yung typical na comment ng isang normal na viewer. Parang may alam... parang may koneksyon.

"Ang dami mo namang alam sa pag-picture. Hahaha," sabi ko na may halong tawa para hindi mahalata na biglang na-activate ang investigative mode ko. Pero deep down, girl, I smell something fishy.

"Sakto lang. Kagaya mo, president din ako. Editor-in-chief ng campus journalism," proud niyang saad, parang ipinapakilala pa lalo ang credentials niya.

"Wow talaga? So ibig sabihin, mahilig ka rin sa mga candid shots... mga stolen moments?" tanong ko, in a tone na parang casual lang, pero actually may hidden agenda.

Napansin ko, biglang nag-pause 'yung sagot niya. 'Yung tipong may half-second delay bago magsalita. At sa gilid ng mata ko, nakita ko 'yung slight change ng expression niya — parang nati-tense.

"Ahh, hindi naman masyado. Madalas hindi ako 'yung photographer, actually," sabi niya, medyo pilit ang tawa.

"Ah ganun ba?" sagot ko habang kunwari ay busy pa rin sa phone. "Pero kung hindi ikaw, eh sino? 'Di ba president ka? So ibig sabihin alam mo kung sino 'yung nag-post ng picture ko?" Diretso ko na, parang nagba-bait ng isda.

Ayun, dead air. Wala akong narinig na sagot galing sa kanya. Ang ginawa lang niya, ngumiti — pero hindi 'yun natural na ngiti. It was the kind na pang-cover up sa something.

At that point, in my head, parang gusto kong isigaw, Gotcha. Pero syempre, hindi muna ako nagpapahalata. Let's see how long he can keep this act.

Paglingon ko sa likod ng kotse, agad na tumama sa paningin ko 'yung glossy black body ng isang DSLR, naka neatly placed sa seat. Mukha pa talagang bago, parang limited edition model na pang-pro. Hala, jackpot. Eto na 'yung clue.

"Edward," sabi ko casually pero with a hint of curiosity, sabay turo ko sa likod, "is that DSLR yours? Like, your personal cam?" Alam mo 'yung tono na parang wala lang pero deep down investigative journalist na ako?

"Ahh... yeah, I bought it like, a while back," sagot niya, pero halata sa boses na medyo hesitant siya. Parang 'yung tipong tinanong mo kung sino ang kasama niya kahapon at hindi siya ready sa interrogation.

"Can I check the shots inside? Like, I just wanna see your portfolio. I'm sure bongga 'yan," sabi ko habang unti-unti na akong lumalapit at aabot na sana. Pero nakita kong may slight panic sa mata niya, 'yung tipong Abort mission, may papasok na intruder.

Bigla na lang namatay 'yung camera. Wow, timing ah.

"Ahh... lowbat pala. I totally forgot to charge it," sabi niya na may slight smile, parang 'yung kind na relief kasi nakaligtas sa pop quiz.

I leaned back sa seat, arms crossed. "Edward, can I ask you something... like, serious-serious?" medyo binaba ko pa boses ko para ma-feel niya 'yung gravity.

"Sure, go ahead," he replied, trying to sound casual pero kita mong alert na siya.

"You're the president of the journalism club, right? So, logically, you'd know kung sino 'yung nag-post ng picture ko. Spill — were you involved?" I asked straight-up, walang paligoy-ligoy.

He didn't answer right away. Instead, I noticed na biglang nag-shift 'yung focus niya sa kalsada, as if kailangan niyang umarangkada bigla. His grip on the steering wheel tightened.

"Sorry, Avery... I honestly don't know. Let's just... drop it, okay?" Seryoso pero obvious na diversion tactic.

The rest of the drive was quiet, pero hindi 'yung comfortable kind of quiet. More like I know you're hiding something but I'll play along for now quiet.

Pagdating namin sa campus, he suddenly said, "You go ahead. I just need to settle something sa clubroom." Hindi na siya tumingin sa akin nang diretso.

I nodded and walked toward our classroom. Pagpasok ko, halos kaunti pa lang ang nandun. I grabbed my notebook, borrowed my seatmate's lecture notes, and started copying para may review material ako later. Pero kahit pilit kong i-immerse ang sarili ko sa sinusulat, my mind kept drifting back to that DSLR and Edward's expression kanina.

Who took that shot? And why does it feel like Edward knows more than he's letting on?

Pagpasok pa lang ng iba naming classmates, sakto namang tapos na ako mag-sulat ng notes. Perfect timing, at least hindi nila nakita na nagmukha akong human typewriter dito sa seat ko.

"Mukha ka nang drained agad, Avery," bati ni Tyron habang may kasamang slight smirk. Para bang gusto niya akong i-tease pero in a friendly way.

"Kakatapos ko lang kasi mag-catch up sa lecture. Yesterday, hindi ako nakapag-notes because I had... things to do," sagot ko, trying to sound casual pero obvious na inaayos ko pa boses ko kasi medyo pagod pa from writing.

Bigla na lang — PITIK! — tinamaan ang noo ko.

"Ouch! Excuse me, assault 'yan!" OA kong reklamo habang hinahaplos ang noo ko na parang may trauma. "Do you know how fragile my brain cells are?" dagdag ko pa, eyes wide para ma-emphasize ang drama.

"That's what you get for slacking off," calm pero teasing niyang sagot.

"Fine," taas kamay ko na parang nag-surrender, "pero grabe ka ha, may terms and conditions pa yata 'yung friendship natin."

"From now on, every time you don't do what you're supposed to do, expect a flick. Consider it... tough love," sabi niya in a tone na parang mix ng kuya mode at protective friend.

Napangiti ako kahit gusto ko sanang mag-roll eyes. Sweet, pero not too sweet. Dangerous territory 'to.

Biglang may boses mula sa gilid. "Wow. Kala mo girlfriend mo na kung maka-akto," singit ni Elliot, leaning back sa upuan niya with that look. Napalingon kaming dalawa ni Tyron — me in slight disbelief, si Tyron in mild confusion.

I let out a slow exhale. "Wow, talking to yourself na pala ngayon? Interesting development," bulong ko pero just loud enough na maririnig niya.

"Ano raw? Ako raw baliw?" Tumayo siya, fully confronting me, parang challenger sa boxing ring.

"Did I stutter? You're literally talking as if you're in some... drama scene, tapos ako pa sinasali mo. Please," balik ko, leaning slightly forward sa desk para mas matapang dating.

The class laughed, enjoying the free entertainment. Pero kami ni Elliot? Deadass staring contest mode.

"I'm not arrogant," he said, brows slightly furrowed. "Ikaw nga feeling ikaw ang boss ng kwarto."

At that moment, everything went quiet. Oh crap. That word kwarto just gave it away. My eyes widened for half a second before I immediately sat down, trying to shrink into my seat. My cheeks? On fire.

I leaned towards him, voice low but sharp. "Seriously? Nice job broadcasting our entire living arrangement to the world. Alam na ng lahat na we're roomates."

He just shrugged. "And so what? Are we doing anything wrong?" Sagot niya, in that deep, nonchalant tone that somehow makes me more self-conscious.

"Wala naman..." I mumbled, eyes still averted kasi I could feel my ears burning too.

"Then stop acting like it's a scandal," he replied before the teacher walked in, ending whatever verbal sparring match we were about to start.

After dismissal, halos lahat ng classmates ko nagmamadaling lumabas. Ako? Still packing my stuff like a grandma folding a tablecloth na maayos, pero mabagal. Hindi ako pwedeng mag-iwan ng kahit isang ballpen, trust issues sa mga nawawalang gamit, okay?

Habang nag-aayos ako, may lumapit na teacher. "Avery, can you give this to Mr. Salvador sa journalism club?" Seryoso ang tono niya, pero may soft smile. Si Mr. Salvador... ah, siya pala 'yung adviser ng campus journalism. Hindi ko pa siya personally nakakilala pero naririnig ko na strict daw siya sa quality ng outputs, very perfectionist.

"Okay po, Ma'am," sagot ko, sabay kuha ng envelope. Errand mode on.

Pagdating ko sa opisina ng journalism club, kumatok muna ako. Walang sumasagot. Hmm... maybe busy? Or baka wala pa siya rito. Kumakatok ulit ako, this time mas malakas. Still no answer. Out of curiosity, tinry kong pihitin ang doorknob and it is open. Well... okay then.

Binuksan ko ang pinto at pumasok, agad ko ring binuksan ang ilaw. That's when I froze. Holy. This is like... a whole gallery inside a school office. Sa paligid, naka-frame ang iba't ibang litrato ng students, events, candid moments and all arranged neatly sa walls. Ang gaganda ng kuha. The lighting, the timing, the angles... pang-exhibit levels talaga. Lopit! Eto 'yung kuha ng mga alam mong nakakaabot sa NSPC, eh!

Lumapit ako sa isang side ng wall at napansin ko na bawat photo may pangalan sa ilalim, giving credit to the photographer. Professional talaga dating, very organized. Pero then, my eyes landed on something sa dulo. Napalunok ako.

It was... my picture. Wait. What?

Kumunot ang noo ko. It wasn't an official school portrait, and I don't remember posing for this. Ang composition, candid, parang stolen shot. At wala itong pangalan ng photographer sa ilalim. Instead, may nakasulat:

"In a world full of judgmental people, there's one person existing keep on fighting with a smile."

Napatigil ako, hawak pa rin ang strap ng bag ko. Slowly, nilapit ko ang kamay ko sa frame at hinawakan ito. Sino... sino ang kumuha nito? Tumingin ako sa mga katabing frames at andun ang mga pangalan ng photographer at paulit-ulit kong nakikita ang pangalan ni Edward.

"Si Edward kaya...?" bulong ko sa sarili ko, pero barely audible.

Bago ko pa ma-process ang thoughts ko, may boses mula sa likod.

"What are you doing here?" lalaking boses, mababa at malamig.

"AH!" Napasigaw ako sa gulat, muntik ko pang mabitawan ang frame. Agad akong humarap, and there he was, isang middle-aged man, naka-formal pero may seryosong mukha.

"I-I'm here to give this note to Mr. Salvador po," mabilis kong sabi habang inabot ko ang envelope, almost like a reflex.

"I'm Mr. Salvador," tugon niya, sabay kuha ng envelope mula sa kamay ko. Oh. Well, that's awkward.

"Okay. You can leave," malamig niyang utos. Straight to the point. Wala man lang warm welcome vibes.

Nag-step back na ako at kinuha ang bag ko. "Thank you and sorry for coming in without permission, sir," sabi ko, polite pa rin kahit medyo kinakabahan ako.

Pero bago ako tuluyang makalabas, narinig ko siyang magsalita. "Tama nga siya, you are beautiful inside and out. You can go home now."

I froze for half a second. 'Tama nga siya'? Who's 'siya'? My mind instantly replayed the earlier thought is the picture, the missing credit, and Edward's name in the other frames. Is it him? Or... someone else?

Lumabas ako ng office with my head full of questions, pero isa lang ang malinaw: hindi matatapos dito ang curiosity ko. This... is a mystery I'm definitely going to solve.

Today is Friday and yes... walang ganap sa amin. Wala kaming klase all day, meaning... free ako! Kahapon ko pa alam 'to kasi mababait ang mga teachers namin na mag-announce agad kung may class suspension or cancellation.

Thank God, hindi sila katulad nung mga prof na last-minute magpapaalam. Alam mo 'yung tipong 8 AM pa first subject mo tapos 5 PM pa pala ang susunod? Para kang stranded sa middle of nowhere for hours, waiting for your next class. No thanks.

Honestly, I needed this free day. Lately parang ang gulo ng mundo ko at parang gusto ko muna mag-reset. Kaya ayun, I decided to visit my old school, St. A. Alam mo 'yung feeling na kahit ilang taon ka nang umalis, 'pag bumalik ka, you still feel like you own the place? Ganun ako sa St. A. Kilala ako ng karamihan, hindi lang kasi student council president ako noon, pero dahil din sa active ako sa events and competitions.

Na-miss ko rin 'yung mga kaibigan ko roon, especially of course, my circle. I mean, they're my constants. The type of friends na kahit ilang buwan kang hindi makipagkita, pag nagkita kayo, parang kahapon lang kayo huling magkasama. At perfect na timing 'to kasi bukas pwede kaming magkita sa St. A grounds, mag-catch up, mag-photo, at siyempre magchismisan. And, well, kailangan ko rin 'yung safe space nila — the type na kahit mag-open up ako about the mess in my life, hindi ako ji-judge.

D1VAAZ

Avery: Hey, girlies! Guess what? Free ako bukas. As in totally free.

Hazel: Wait, like FREE free? Wala ka talagang gagawin? Kasi last time mo sinabi 'yan, you ghosted us for a dance rehearsal.

Avery: Promise! This time legit. Wala kaming klase tomorrow and libre ako, so I was thinking... let's meet at St. A bukas.

Elyza: Omg, gusto ko 'yan! You haven't visited for months.

Daphne: Yes please! Parang ang tagal na nating hindi nagkukulitan sa oval. And I miss your drama, Avery.

Avery: Wow, drama agad? Anyway, I just feel like I need a breather from everything. And where else but St. A, right?

Hazel: Sige, game. Pero ikaw treat ha, kasi ikaw may dahilan kung bakit hindi tayo nagkikita lately.

Avery: Fine. The food is on me, okay? Happy now?

Daphne: Happiest.

Pagkagising ko kinabukasan, hindi ko agad binuksan ang phone ko. Instead, I just lay there, staring sa ceiling, letting the sunlight peek through my sheer curtains. Today is the day, sabi ko sa sarili ko. The day na babalik ako sa St. A, not as the student they once knew, but as the Avery na mas refined, mas confident, mas... untouchable. At least, 'yun ang peg.

Bumangon ako slowly, the kind of morning na walang pagmamadali pero intentional lahat ng galaw. I walked to my closet here sa room namin and hindi siya ordinary closet, more like a curated mini-boutique na puno ng perfectly steamed clothes and color-coded racks. As I slid my fingers through the hangers, I could almost hear the silent debate sa utak ko. Do I go all-out, or do I serve the "effortless but expensive" look?

After a few minutes, I pulled out my choice which is a cream silk button-down blouse from Sandro Paris, soft against the skin pero structured sa collar, na parang sinasabing, I'm here to make an impression, but I'm not trying too hard. Paired it with high-waist beige tailored trousers from Max Mara, perfectly pressed, giving my legs that elongated effect. For shoes, nude Louboutin pumps — hindi ko na kailangang i-explain, the red sole speaks for itself. I kept my jewelry minimal but deliberate: Cartier Juste un Clou bracelet and pearl studs from Mikimoto. My Hermès Kelly bag in gold tone leather rested on the chair, ready to be part of the ensemble.

Sa vanity table ko, sinimulan ko ang aking GRWM. First step, skincare — Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair serum kahit umaga, because I swear by the glow it gives. Followed by Estee Lauder Revitalizing Supreme+ cream to keep my skin plump. Primer? Laura Mercier Pure Canvas Primer for that smooth-as-glass base. Then I went in with one pump of NARS Light Reflecting Foundation, blending it into my skin so naturally na parang second skin. A touch of NARS Radiant Creamy Concealer sa under eyes, Charlotte Tilbury Airbrush Bronzer for subtle warmth, and a sweep of Pillow Talk blush on the apples of my cheeks.

For the eyes, I swiped Laura Mercier Caviar Stick in Rosegold, added a soft matte brown in the crease, curled my lashes, and finished with Charlotte Tilbury Legendary Lashes mascara. My lips? Charlotte Tilbury Pillow Talk lipstick topped with a thin coat of Dior Lip Glow Oil para lang hydrated at juicy tignan. And finally, a light mist of Chanel Coco Mademoiselle. The scent lingered in the air, instantly setting the tone for the day.

After a last mirror check — hair in soft waves, outfit perfectly pressed, makeup on point — I grabbed my phone and booked a Grab Premium. I wasn't about to step into St. A sweaty and windblown; no, I was arriving like I had my own driver. The car arrived in minutes, and I slid into the leather seat like I'd done it a thousand times.

On the way, I stared out the tinted window, watching the scenery shift from the busy streets to the quieter, more familiar surroundings leading to St. A. My heart had this odd mix of excitement and nostalgia — the kind that made you want to smile but also brace yourself. It's been a while. Let's see if anything's changed... or if I have.

Pagdating sa gate, it felt surreal. The same concrete walls, the same manicured gardens, the same scent of freshly cut grass from the soccer field. Students in their crisp uniforms passed by, some laughing, some staring at their phones, completely unaware that I once walked these halls every day. Teachers stood chatting near the admin building, just like before.

I took a deep breath and stepped forward, my heels clicking against the pavement and the sound felt louder than it should be, almost like it was announcing my return. My Kelly bag swung lightly at my side, my perfume trailing behind me. And just as I was about to head to the main building...

"Avery?" a deep, familiar voice called out.

I turned, and there he was... David.

The same sharp jawline, the same eyes that once seemed to read right through me. His expression was a mix of surprise and something I couldn't quite place.

"Long time no see," he said, his lips curving into a half-smile that didn't reach his eyes.

For a moment, the background noise faded. I could feel the stares — some curious, some whispering. My grip tightened on my bag strap.

Argh, of all people.