Nights Like This

CHAPTER 16

"Maam hindi ka pa po mag lu- lunch?" tanong ni Janine sa akin while she's leaning on me.

"I'll go out in a bit, Janine. Thank you," sabi ko saka bumalik ssa tina- type kong report sa computer.

Today is not a really busy day for me because I already finished most of my work. This report and the meeting later with the team at the afternoon are the one left to do. I didn't even notice that it's already lunch time. Whenever I am doing something and I put all my focus to my task, ara na akong nasa sarili kong bubble.

"Mag lu- lunch pa lang rin po kasi ako Maam. Baka lang po gusto nyong may kasabay kumain kasi ako po gusto kong may kasabay," naka ngiting sabi nya sa akin na medyo hesitatnt din.

"Where's everybody? Aren't you going to lunch with them?" I asked her. I stretched my neck and then roamed my eyes. Wala ng ibang tao rito kundi kaming dalawa ni Janine.

She's pressing her lips together and then her arms are clasped together while waiting for my answer.

I saved my work and closed the tab and then tumayo. "Let's go."

Janine's lips stretced fully when I got uo from my seat. Kinuha ko yung wallet ko sa bag. I looked at Vance's office to see kung nasa loob pa ba sya. The lights are on pero dahil pati naka baba ang blinds ng window nya, I don't see anything from the outside.

Janine and I opted for the cafeteria. That is the best option that we could have because we don't have forever to wait for our food to arrive.

I usually don't mind other prople's stares at me but these days, I feel like it's getting through me. Some are just sneaking glances at me but there are some people who really boldly stares at me that it's getting uncomfortable.

I guess that it is about the fight between Zara and I. I kind of expected that already because the teais hot and they want teas.

"Maam panigurado po angdami nyo ng followers 'no?" tanong ni Janine sa akin.

Among all the co- workers that we have, Janine's the only one who has the guts to talk back to me or even

"Followers? I really don't do social media," I informed her.

Namilog ang mata nya sa sinabi ko at mukhang hindi makapaniwala. Well, I mean, sino nga naman ang walang socials at our age? May mga account ako pero it's been ages since I last opened them.

"Seryoso Maam? Edi you don't know po na medyo napag usapan ka sa social media?" she confusedly asked and that made me more confused.

"What do you mean? Anong..." I feel like biglang nag iba yung bigat ng t***k ng puso ko and I feel like there's a lump on my throat.

Me being a topic to the people doesn't sit right with me. Mamaya pala, it is because of a negative something or they're bashing me or what.

"Naging talk of the town ka Maam kasi ang ganda mo nung in- interview ka. Wala ka talagang balak mag artista Maam?" she asked.

Hearing that from Janine, I know that it's true. Umurong yung kaba ko bigla. It's like I have peace all over with me again.

Umiling ako. "Wala talaga. I'm really not not interested."

Janine pouted and then nods her head while munching her rice and sisig while I grabbed my mango juice and drinks it because I feel like nanuyi ang lalamunan ko sa tanong ko kay Janine kanina.

Sanay naman na akong mapag usapan because it's been like that as long as I can remember because of my family and their career. Bata pa lang ako I was already exposed to the world and somewhat bought up na it is what it should be. Nung nagka isip na ako, I realized that that's not how I want it to be. Because the more na na e- expose ako sa mundo na iyon, the more that I have to act and I hate it. I hate pretensions.

I hated it that I am forcing myself to act like someone that's up to my family standards of how I should be. You know, that's crazy and that's suffocating for me and I had no really freedom. And so, when I had that tiny freedom that I got, I did things that I wanna do. But I still have to hide it because my reality is far from that.

"Sayang Maam. Ang ganda ganda mo pa naman," aniya. "Pero may isa pa Maam."

I curiously looked at her. "Hindi ka talaga nauubusan ng baon na mga gossip 'no?" sabi ko sa kanya.

"Ito naman si Maam. Hindi naman chismis yung sasabihin ko. Kwento ko lang naman sa 'yo Maam," aniya.

"Okay. What is it?" tanong ko.

Her face suddenly changed into something that I cannot exactly explain what it is but she looks like something that's hungry for information.

"Ang daming naiingit sa 'yo Maam," aniya. "May nakakapansin po kasi na ang bait sa'yo ni Sir Vance palagi saka close na daw po kayo samantalang sila, natatakot pa rin na i- approach si Sir, akala po nila kakalmuyin sila ni Sir minsan," aniya to which I laughed.

I could get the hint of jealousy in her voice. I get it. I wanna laugh when I remembered Vance's cat socks.

"Va- I mean, he could look intimidated but he's a good person and I can attest to that. Just ask him whenever you guys need him. Hindi naman sya mangangagat," I said.

Well, gets ko naman where they're coming from. Mukha nga namang hindi madaling i approach si Vance but I have already proven that to be not true.

"Akala pa nga ng iba may sometjing sa inyo ni Sir eh," sabi nya sa akin.

Lalong nagulat ako because where did that came from? That's absurd!

"No! That's not true! Oh my gosh?"

I wanna face palm.

Hindi ko alam na binibigyan na pala ng ibang tao ng wrong interpretation yung pagiging okay namin ni Vance.

I mean, he's a boss so definitely, that's not it. I don't wanna create an office drama with him.