Dusk Kisses

13

"Ano? G na tayo? Sasama ka, ah?" Syrus has been bugging me since the moment my eyes went open. She wants me—more like demands me to be her chaperone for their outing next week, actually bukas na magsisimula ang outing nila. Sabi niya, kailangan ko daw sumama kasi hindi siya sasama kung hindi raw ako sasama.

And as I’ve told her earlier, hindi na niya kailangan ng chaperone, hindi ko kailangan sumama. At kahit pa gusto kong lumabas nang walang parental supervision or whatever, ayaw ko pa rin lumabas ng kung sino-sino ang kasama. Yes they’re my friends but that’s not enough for me to feel comfortable around them. At t’saka baka ma-out of place lang ako ro’n. Traveling without my parents has been a long dream but I don't think this is the right time yet. It's a 5 day outing sa Batangas, may resort daw kasi ro'n sila Mae kaya they've decided to have a short vacation there to celebrate our successful intrams.

"Sinabi ko na sa'yo ‘di ba? Ayoko nga! Ba't ba ang kulit mo" i rolled my eyes as she glared at me.

“E, paano na lang ako? Ako ang nagplano tapos ako ang hindi makakasama?!" Niyuyugyog niya pa 'ko para lang pansinin ko siya. Konti na lang talaga papalabasin ko na 'to! I love her but not when she’s being annoying like this!

“Hindi ko naman sinabing ‘wag kang sumama.”

“Gusto nga kitang kasama! Madaming club dun, I assure you that we’ll have the best of our sembreak…  isn’t that what everybody wants?” She tried to convince me but that didn’t do its job well. Imbis na makumbinsi ako sa club-club na yan, lalo lang ako napaatras!

"Seriously? Club talaga? And what made you think they’ll let you go inside? I hate to break your bubble but... chrissake! You’re a minor." I paused the movie I'm watching right now just to talk to her. There’s no sense continuing this movie while she’s here because as long as she’s blabbering beside me, lalo lang nawawala ang atensyon ko sa movie. Wala na rin akong maintindihan.

“Isa’t kalahating taon na lang naman na, major na ‘ko!” she stands up from seating on the armrest of the couch t’saka umikot sa likod ng no’n at tumabi sa akin.

I offered a rueful smile but with a mix of my creased forehead. “Major ka diyan?”

“Duh? 18?” I may have a straight face on the outside but I am internally laughing with every limb within. This girl really has a knack for making serious situations funny.

“You are still underage.” I firmly said.

"Sige na, please?" She tried to do the puppy eyes, as if she's cute. Mukha lang siyang puppy na  minumura ka sa isip niya. "Please?"

"Ako ba may hawak ng emosyon mo? hindi ka ba makakapag enjoy do'n ng wala ako?" i stood up and went to the kitchen, kukuha ako ng ice cream.

"Pero ang awkward nang wala ka do'n!" I sighed when i found nothing but water inside the fridge. Wala pa rin ba sa mood si Aia para mag grocery? Tsk. Damn that motherfucker, sumama kasi kay Ate mag grocery tuloy pati grocery shopping ayaw na gawin ni Aia! 

"Edi isipin mong nando'n ako!"

"Pwede ba 'yon?"

"Broaden your imaginations!"

"Pinapakomplikado mo lang, sis! Sumama ka na kasi,"

"Ayoko." I bluntly uttered.

"E, anong gagawin mo sa two weeks na sembreak?!" I sighed again. Hearing her say that made me question my whole plan. Konting pilit pa. "Netflix, kain, house chores, ligo, tulog. On repeat!" singhal ko, sanay naman na ako sa kakulitan nito pero bakit nakakainis pa rin talaga.

"You know what? You're so boring. Boring na KJ pa!"

"Ikaw nga maingay na nakakainis pa nagreklamo ba ako?" I shot back. And what I said was something I didn't think thoroughly about. Nagrereklamo nga pala ako. Sa isip ko lang naman!

After ng intrams namin bumalik ang lahat sa normal, we had classes, graded activities, even our midterms came. November ang finals namin for 2nd grading. Wala kaming exam nung month ng intrams kaya medyo rush sila sa pagtuturo nung before mag sembreak. Ngayon, last day ng midterms namin. Start na ng sembreak bukas kaya nagplano nga sila ng outing.

"Pag sumama ka, sasabihin ko na yung surname ng crush ko! sa 'yo lang, ah?" without wanting to let her know that i’m really interested in what she promised, i raised my brow subtly.

Pa-oo na ‘ko. Isang pilit na lang. “Hindi ba ako lugi dun? Apelyido lang talaga?” tanong ko. Baka mamaya Cruz ang apelyido ng crush niya, baka sumakit pa ang ulo ko sa tuwing sasagi sa isip ko kung ilang libo sa Pilipinas ang may Cruz na apelyido. I saw how she tried to stop herself from celebrating, hindi pa naman siya sigurado na sasama na talaga ako. 

“May lahi ka talagang demanding, ‘no? Fine,” she blabbered enough for me to think na may lahi siya ng sama ng loob. “f*******: account—f*******: lang pwede kasi inactive siya dun!” She even pointed at me. i let a smirk express my victory. 

to good to be true but... maybe i should give it a chance. "Okay... deal," we clasped our hands together to seal the deal.

We looked like some dirty business women doing the dirty transactions. My eyes were narrowed at the sight of her. parang duda pa nga ako! Malay ko ba kung anong nasa utak nito. 

"joke, asa ka!" sinasabi ko na nga ba!

"what the?!" she dashed off!

mabilis siyang nakalabas sa unit kaya wala akong choice kundi habulin siya nang nakayapak!

"sumama ka, ah? ipapasundo kita!" she shouted before stepping inside the elevator!

"You know that I really hate you, right now, right?" I replied even though there’s a high chance that she didn’t hear it. Psh! Aalis na lang ng gano'n ganun pag nakuha na yung gusto niya? She made the deal like an opportunist! I reached for my phone on the table na katabi ng couch. I was about to text Aia, pero naunahan na niya ako.

From: Asteria

Oo, pwede kang sumama. Kanina ko pa kausap ‘tong kaibigan mo. Be safe, wag ka na magpuyat maaga ka daw nila susunduin. And don't worry about me, Love lots:*

"May kissing emoji pa! kapal!" She's grossing me out!

To: Asteria

I wasn't even thinking of u ;)

Pangbibiro ko pa sa kaniya.

Planadong planado, ah?

Nauna yung paalam bago ako suyuin sumama. Napasinghap ako at dinial yung number ni Syrus but she was freakin' unreachable.

"Hah!" I scoffed when I got annoyed, she seemed to be ignoring me on purpose.

Later that afternoon, i got busy packing for my things. Medyo may kalakihan yung luggage na gagamitin ko. Nagdadalawang isip pa nga ako dahil baka makasikip yung luggage ko pero naalala kong masyadong malaki ang coaster para sa eight passengers lang. I’m sure there will be a space for this one. Coaster nila Daustine ang gagamitin namin para daw maka ikot rin kami sa Batangas, para daw hindi lang sa isang resort kami naka stuck. sila na gumawa ng sarili nilang field trip—sarili naming field trip.

After packing, I decided to take a shower then nag skincare din ako tsaka nagsuot ng pjs. Nagpa-deliver na lang ako for dinner dahil di daw makakauwi si Aia nang maaga. I checked the wall clock, it's 7 pm palang. I realized that Syrus had a point. Ngayon pa nga lang boring na. Realizing something, buti na lang pala at may outing. Magkakaro’n ng kwenta yung one week ng sembreak ko. Ngayon palang na iniisip ko, nakakasawa rin yung kain tulog cycle.

I killed my time sa panonood ng fav series ko, i cried a lot dahil sa story, it was one of a kind. I continued watching without being aware na inaantok na pala ako kaya i immediately fell asleep. Good thing I was watching in my room, ayokong makatulog sa sofa. It's the most uncomfortable thing on earth. Well that’s, at least, for me.

The next morning, I woke up around 2 am because of my alarm. Aia was sleeping kaya I lifted my footsteps discreetly, afraid to make loud noises, I want her to take a peaceful rest, kawawa naman mukhang pagod na pagod siya, e.

Naligo ako with hot water, di ko kinaya ang lamig ng tubig sa umaga. Baka lumabas akong nagyeyelo gaya ni Anna kung hindi ako gagamit ng mainit na tubig. After then, I quietly left the unit with no traces. Lip Tint and powder lang yung makeup ko dahil masyadong maaga para sa glam look, ayoko namang gulatin sila. I put my hair in a bun so I won't have any struggle sa pagtulog mamaya, ayokong magmukha akong sadako habang natutulog 'no! And my hair is kinda long na rin.

the elevator has reached the parking lot. Hindi pa nagbubukas nang tuluyan ang pinto ng elevator, nakilala ko na agad kung sino ang nakatalikod sa harap nun. He’s too familiar for me not to notice, t’saka yung pabango niya? Amoy na amoy ko agad kahit halos 2 meters pa ang layo ko sa kanya. The moment I noticed that he’s about to turn around. My reflex betrayed me. Otomatiko akong napakapa sa tear ducts ko para tignan kung may muta pa ba ako. Nakakahiya naman kung meron.

I stole a sight of him as i caught him l*****g his lips softly. "Morning," he greeted with a sweet smile, gumanti ako ng ngiti bago lumabas sa lift. He ran his hand through his hair as he trailed his sight back to me. I gave him an up and down eyes, evaluating his look. He was wearing a black minimalistic tee, khaki chino shorts, and his favorite silver watch. assume ko lang na favorite niya yun kasi lagi niyang suot.

“Asan si Sy?” agad kong tanong. Akala ko kasi siya ang sasalubong sa akin, medyo nakakahiya nga sa driver, sana sinabihan ko na lang yung guard na payagan silang maghintay sa tapat ng building dahil makakababa naman ako agad, hindi na sana nila kailangan magbayad ng parking fee. Kahit pa 70 pesos lang yun.

His forehead creased as his eyes started to question me. “Why? Am I not enough?”

“Sira, hinahanap ko lang yun kasi may atraso sa’kin yun.” i chuckled, stil remembering how he delivered those words. Napaka convincing ng reaksyon niya.

“They’re picking up something… kape yata?” 

"Ahh" i made a continuous sound. Sa totoo lang, masyado ko na yata pinanindigan ang pagiging awkward ko. Hindi ko alam ang isasagot ko sa kanya. After the deafening silence, he finally parted his lips to talk again. "kumain ka na?" I'm ashamed of how frenzied I acted when he threw the first word.

"a-ah oo, I woke up early."

He nodded slowly. “Excited ka?”

“Not really, ayoko lang malate.” Being late is probably the worst thing ever. It’s not practical. At ayokong may pinaghihintay dahil baka bumaliktad ang gulong at dumating sa point na ako naman ang paghintayin nila. Just like the old saying goes, don’t do unto others what you don’t want others to do unto you. 

He looked like he’s thinking about what to do next or does he still have any question to ask me. But when he failed he exhaled quickly—which was loud enough for me to hear. "Great. Tara na?"

I nodded to affirm, "let's go..." kinuha niya yung luggage ko and he led the way kung nasaan naka park yung coaster.

“Ikaw? Kumain ka na ba?” pagbabalik ko sa kanya ng tanong habang ilang metro pa ang layo namin sa coaster.

I don’t know why his eyes slowly resembled a circle shape when that question came out from my mouth. He began to slowly shake his head as he darted his gaze straight to my eyes, “hindi pa… may dadaanan naman tayong convenience store, I’d buy there later.”

“Mamaya pa yun, baka malipasan ka lang kung maghihintay ka pa. I have a sandwich here, gusto mo? Wait, may allergy ka ba sa tuna?” tuna lang kasi yung alam kong gawin sa sandwich maybe i’ll try chicken next time.

He shook his head briefly. “Masarap ba yan?” parang nagdududa pa siya.

“E, ‘di huwag. Ikaw na nga ‘tong bibigyan,” I hissed. “you’re so maarte.” i’m confident na the taste of my sandwich is pretty decent naman pero kung pagdududahan niya, aba ‘wag na lang.

“Hey i was just kidding, ‘wag ka nang magalit…” he said, seeming like he’s appeasing a mad tiger.

With a little bit of impulsiveness, I turned a little to my side to dart my gaze to him. “Hindi naman ako galit.”

He exhaled through his mouth hastily, expressing his disbelief. “Sure,” a small that-boy grin flashed upon his lips as a subtle dimple on the side of his cheek slightly appeared.

The trip took approximately four hours and seventeen minutes, not including our stop-overs. Nakaligtas na nga kami sa traffic. Halos eight am na rin ng nakarating kami ro’n. Mae instantly told us to settle in our rooms first after then we’ll have our breakfast at the beachfront. 

I was more than surprised when I found out Mae booked VIP rooms for all of us but Xera and I both disagreed. We told her it's not in any way practical and we don't want her to spend excessively for us. She tried to insist pero inunahan ko na siyang magbook ng regular hotel room.

She was sulking when the word came to her. She can call me rude and all but I don't want her parents to think na inaabuso namin yung anak nila.

"Inaantok pa 'ko, tapos ang sakit-sakit pa ng ulo ko! Parang hinahati na sa dalawa!" Syrus whined like a kid. She's my roommate. 

“Hindi ka pa ba nakuntento sa apat na oras mong tulog—for the record, four hours straight!” come to the point, ako nga ‘tong walang tulog dahil sa akin siya sumisiksik, naaalibadbaran ako.

“Ay? Apat na oras ba dapat ang tulog ng isang tao—“ tumigil siya nang magsalita ako.

"Hey, hey, hey… for the godforsaken record, you’re the one who planned this, you’re the one who insisted on this trip, you’re the one who dragged me into this, so you deal with that, too!" I pointed to her forehead and my index finger touched her lightly, pero dahil over-acting siya, napaatras yung ulo niya. “magyayaya kang lumayas tapos simpleng kulang sa tulog, reklamo ka naman? Daig mo pa nag-drive!” geez, I sounded like a mom. She glared at me as my lips traced a smirk before we went out and directly headed to the elevator.

surprise was out of the picks when i saw Kent inside the lift. He's with our classmate, Daustine. Hindi ko alam kung friends na ba ulit kami. Ayoko lang din siguro mag-assume na magkaibigan na ulit kami. I hate everything one sided. Lalo na yung tinuturing mong kaibigan tapos para sa kanya kakilala ka lang. Ang hirap ng ganun. Ang komplikado. Hassle. Kaya kadalasan, sila ang hinahayaan kong mag-decide kung ano kami. Nakakatakot kaya mag-decide. Just like chess, one wrong move and the next thing you’ll see is how you lose everything.

It's easy to read their faces and it tells me that they need to get their sleep right or hell will break loose. Nevertheless, I got impressed upon evaluating their looks. Even when sleep-deprived, they still managed to pull off their summer outfits just fine—or maybe beyond just fine.

Kahit nga parang pinlantsa ang mga mukha nila, bagay pa rin sa kanila. i mean, i admit that my these people are all good looking pero sobra naman yata na kahit kulang sa tulog presentable pa rin tignan? Kent was just looking straight but as soon as I got caught in his sight he raised his brows up quickly.

and all of a sudden, there's this strange feeling inside me that I'm really having a hard time dealing with. The way it feels was so rare and unfamiliar. Constipated ba ako? As far as i am aware of, hindi naman? 

I immediately turned my back against them as soon as Sy and I hopped in. I don't know why I found myself smiling and I didn't want to come out as a creep so I tried to stop. Hindi ko alam kung may mali na ba sa akin at hindi ko maramdaman ang pagod ko samantalang sila parang naipit ng langit at lupa. Lalo na si Daustine.

Parang nagliwanag ang langit kasabay ng pag ngiti ni Syrus, "whoa, gandang bungad sa umaga…” Sy clicked her tongue, “naks! Ang pogi natin, ah?" sumigla bigla si Syrus. Pumasok na ko sa elevator, nasa likod ko sina Kent tsaka si Syrus and Daustine. Indistinctly chatting.

“Akala ko ba masakit ulo mo," i barely had the voice to talk. My voice was naturally raspy every morning, malay ko kung bakit. Hindi ko naman nakikita yun as a problem that I should get rid off kaya hinahayaan ko na lang.

"May sinasabi ka batang paos?" Syrus pointed it out with an arched brow.

I tried to smile but it seemed to be a wince instead. "Wala, madam" i glanced at her from my back then immediately stepped out from the moment the elevator bell rang.

Nauna nang maglakad si Syrus dahil inunahan niya na yung sweet spot, which is yung upuan na mas malapit sa view ng dagat. “Are you okay?” I asked Kent. hindi ako bulag para hindi makitang pinipilit niyang h’wag pumikit.

“Yeah… but the bed’s just calling for me,” 

“Decline mo muna,” I joked, thinking if that would be enough to bring, at least, a little smile on his face. “Sa daan ang tingin, ‘wag sa’kin.” baka mamaya sa sobrang antok niya matisod pa siya.

He raised a brow. He probably didn’t expect me to grab the chance to boss around him. “Yes, ma’am.” he smirked. That’s better than having his all straight face.

"Good morning!" I heard Mae, she stood up from her seat to welcome us, as if namang di kami magkakasama kanina! Nag beso kami then we shifted to our seats.

"Oh, asan si Xera?" I asked.

"Still sound asleep! I was trying to wake her up earlier but she refused to come with me, she said later na lang daw siya magbe-breakfast, she's exhausted daw. Akala mo naman she drove all the way up to here" 

I looked at Syrus with a teasing grin. “Oh, same goes with this one, kulang na lang dalhin ang unan pababa rito,” I pointed to Sy as she pouted like a cry baby.

"boys, Do you know how to surf? I can lend you some surfing boards. I heard, Malakas daw 'yung waves mamayang afternoon," Mae enthusiastically offered, her eagerness to enjoy is making me terribly excited.

Halatang halata na she's doing it para mag enjoy kami, and if possible, bumalik dito. Nakuha na niya siguro 'yung gano'ng mindset sa mga magulang niya, business minded.

It's completely a good thing. Kailangan mo mag isip ng way kung paano mo mapapabalik 'ang customers mo. Alam ko na ang mga strategy na ganoon dahil nga sa mga business namin, actually it’s just a basic thing about business. Such a broad world.

"Teka, ba't boys lang? Unfair naman yata iyon? ako din, sasama ako!" Pagsingit ni Syrus. Napatingin na lang din ako sa kanya ng sabihin niya yun. I don’t think this girl knows how to surf. But she’s a fast learner.

"Bakit marunong ka ba magsurf?" tanong ni Michael pero yun tono naman niya parang nangbabara na. The same way how he talks when we’re having a mock debate.

She raised a brow at him. "bakit ikaw? marunong ka?" 

"Well, I hate to break it to you, but yes."

"oh talaga? san mo natutunan—sa libro?" para siyang batang sa kalye na nagtatawag ng away! Her voice was so loud, even strangers' attention got caught in the hook!

"Hindi ka pa rin marunong," pagpapa-mukha ni Mark, but to no avail, Sy just seemed much more determined than she ever was.

"there's always a first time 'no!" dagdag niya pa.

"Tama na yan, Andito na yung food," I informed them when I saw three waitresses heading in our direction. Dumating yung mga server ng hotel nila Mae dala-dala ang iba't ibang klase ng putahe na signatured ng Batangas. Yung iba sa mga food pamilyar na sa akin dahil nakikita ko kay Aia sa tuwing nanonood siya ng mga documentary vlogs about Philippine tourist spots. 

I saw how their faces showed their amusement and confusion. I bet they don't have any idea what kind of meals were served on the table. Inilapag iyon isa-isa. Daustine's lips parted when he saw a familiar food, steak na may side dish na fries.

"Aray!" Daustine groaned harshly nung hinampas ni Mae yung kamay niya, he wanted to get the side dish kasi. He dramatically waved his hand through the air, "Muntik na ‘ko mapilayan, bakal ba ‘yang kamay mo?" 

"Stave off your hunger, Pictures muna!" Shortened explanation ni Mae kung bakit niya pinigilan 'yung pag kuha ni Daustine sa side dish.

"Ano ba 'to?" Daustine's pertaining to deep fried fish.

"It's tawilis, a freshwater sardine exclusively found in the Philippines'' She slowly threw the words out, boasting.

"How about this one?" Syrus asked out of curiosity.

"How about this one?" Mark mocked her. trip talaga nila si Syrus today. The bunso is always worth annoying. Nagtawanan yung apat pati si Mae. Not because Mark’s funny but because Syrus’ nose was close to fuming! Ayokong mainis siya sa akin dahil natatawa ako so i got no choice but to bite the insides of my cheek to contain my laugh. If only looks could kill, kanina pa pinaglalamayan yung apat.

"I wish alunin ka mamaya pag nag surf ka!" they’re the ones who always pick on each other pero sila rin yung laging magkasama, sila nga yung nakakarelate sa isa’t isa. Their language and humor, it’s really something big when they collide.

“Paano ako makakapag surf kung hindi ako aalunin? Tanga ka ba?” there they go again. I rest my back against the seat backrest t’saka ko pinag krus ang mga braso ko. I swear, kung walang pipigil dito sa dalawang ‘to, makakawitness ako at ang lahat ng tao dito ng world war 3.

Thank God, Mae holds the upper hand so the tension loosened. "Oh, anyway." Napahampas si Mae sa hangin bago ilabas ang huli niyang mga tawa. "It's the famous Batangas' bulalo.....'yan ang pinaka binabalik-balikan dito"

"Sana all binabalikan," Mark hissed sabay tumingin kay Kent. my mind got clouded with questions pero ni isa sa mga tanong, wala akong masabi. Hihintayin ko na lang na sumagi sa isip nila at sila mismo ang magtanong. But there’s another thing I can't take care about. And that is why I can't stop wondering.

nagkabalikan na kaya sila ni Hanna?

our eyes met but i turned my head a little bit on the side abruptly, trying to get away from his eyes… but i don’t feel like resisting it. Ako mismo ang tumingin pabalik when my gut said that he wasn't looking anymore. Masyadong nakaka... wala sa wisyo yun mga tinginan niya. Sometimes, i get the urge to stare at his eyes and do nothing but stare only kasi ang ganda talaga ng mata niya pero ayokong magmukhang wirdo kaya pinipigilan ko. Hindi naman siguro masama ang humanga? Yeah right. As long as I keep it all to myself only. I inadvertently gulped, furrowing my brows before looking away, again. Waiting for him... I don't know… maybe waiting for him to say something that’d give me a clue?