Chapter 17
2523 Words
A/N:UNEDITED ENJOY READING GOD BLESS US ALL! LOVE LOTS MGA LANGGA STAY SAFE! EVERYONE.
We want to see Jesus lifted high
A banner that flies across this land
That all men might see the truth and know
He is the way to heaven We want to see, we want to see
We want to see Jesus lifted high
We want to see, we want to see
We want to see Jesus lifted high
if a boy cries for a girl it doesn't mean he is weak, it's his heart which is now hers and not in control of that boy, BOY' ALSO HAVE A SOFT HEART, THEY ALSO CRY- MEET YOURQUOTEIN.
Chapter 17
"BINILISAN KO talaga Sil ang pagpunta ko dito" I was very much shock when he called me telling na nandito na siya sa pilipinas kaya walang ano-ano na pumunta ako sa airport at napakabilis talaga ng media dahil na ttunugan kaagad nila ang pagadting niya I was expecting for a very secured and private arrival of him here.
"bakit ka naman nagmamadlai geum may nangyari ba?" kinakabahan na tanong ko, hindi siya umimik pero kinalikot niya lang ang cellhoe at nilahad iyon sa akin.
"watch it Sil it was taken 3 days ago" aniya isang video iyon mukhang galing sa CCTV ng aking bahay. Kabado man ako at plinay iyon. Nanlaki ang mga mata ko sa nakita ni hindi ko kaagad maibuka ang bibig at ni salita walang lumabas.
"the president and I checked your House camera's ilang buwan na naming nakikita ang saskayan nay an at may mga kalalakihang nag maman-man sa bahay mo according to Pres. Jung Initial investigation mga sindikato daw yan "see for the photo's attached Sil may nagpapadala sayo ng regalo kada buwan and it's either patay na pusa, daga aso o dikaya gutay gutay na damit with lot's of blood and we are freaking worrioed of your security " aniya.
Halos panalamigan ako sa mga pinagbabalita sa akin ni Geum.
"at ito talaga ang nagudyok sa aking pumunta dito to make sure you are okay Sil" he said. Isang litrato na blurred isang babaeng nakatali sa silya sira-sirang damit at duguan.
"we are very startled Sil when we saw the photo it is no doubt it was you and I am fukcing worried about you" he said.
Halos manlamig ako sa sinabi niya bumibigat ang dibdib ko hindi ko masabi sa kanilang may kakambal nga pala ako all they know that I was running away with my husband.
"t-this is not me Geum... this is my Twin Sister Gold" sa wakas ay nasabi ko.
Nanlaki ang mata niya "WHAT?!!"
"I'm sorry for not telling you but I have a twin sister we lost communication many years ago"ani ko.
Mukhang nahimasmasan siya subalit bakas pa rin sa mukha na naguguluhan siya "s**t!" malutong na mura niya.
"I am very sorry Sil I didn'yt know buong akala ko prank call lang iyon lalo na at nakita kong okay ka ngayon" he said sa boses na nagsososry na hindi ko alam.
"bb-bakit" kabadong tanong ko.
"we received a call asking for a money ransom juts to realease you" he said.
Mabilis ang pagsapo ko sa sariling tyan ng makaramdam ng sakita t kirot doon.
"s**t! are okay Sil?" daluhong nito sa akin
"sorry for making your worried but can you please give me the number of the captors b-baka kaya di nagpaparamdam ang kapatid ko kasi bihag siya ng mga taong iyon"
Kahit naman hindi kami in good terms ni ate Gold I am still worried and love her no matter what happen she was my tiwn at hindi iyon mababago.
"b-bakit?"
"I need to save my sister if that is what Geum she was in danger."
"oh my gosh?!" he said realizing what I was saying and telling to him
"but I need your help Geum and I am relying on you I don't want anybody in my family including pres and the company involve here sana sa atin lang muna ito please" pagsususmamo ko sa kaniya, nilapitan niya ako at umupo sa tabi ng sofa kung saan ako nakaupo. He hugged me comforting me I managed to embrace him also kung hindi lang talaga kumalabog ng malakas ang pinto hindi ako mapapabitaw sa kaniya.
"E-evan" I said. Nandidilim ang mukha nito he was red all over his face his jaw is clenching so hard with his brows knotted so much. At bago ko pa siyang pigilan sa gagawin inundayan niya na ng malalaks na suntok si Geum.
"stop it Evan ano ba!!!!" sigaw ko habang kinubabawan niya na ang probreng si Geum na walang ginawa kundi iharang ang mga kamay sa mukha he was receiving his strong punched naamoy ko rin na mukhang na kainom ito buong pwersa kong hinakilit siya at inalyo sa kay Geum na may putok na labing dumudugo na ngayon.
"STOP THAT YOU MONSTER!!!!" sigaw ko sabay tulak sa kaniya ulit ng akmang susugurin na naman niya si Geum,
"Tumigil ka na Evan tumigil ka! " sigaw ko at duro sa kaniya.
He didn't answer me but his red eyes was evident telling me he was hurting so bad he was red all over his face halaatng galit nag alit siya naglalabasan pa sa leeg niya ang ugat maging ang sa kamao at braso niyang ugat tila galit na galit din.
"l-lasing ka na Evan go home now, please wag kang mag-amok dito"
Hindi siya umiimik kaya naman inalalayan ko na si Geum at ipapaosk ito sa kwarto he was just there standing while looking at us tumingin ako ulit sa kaniya.
"Umalis ka na Evan bago pa isipan kong ipakaladkad ka sa labas sinasabi ko sayo if you are thinking that bad, mali ka, hindi ako katulad mo I won't cheated dahil alam mong hindi ako ganoon but if you will doing this I will file a restrating order against you." I said.
Laglag ang balikat he was not speaking yumuko siya tumalikod but see how his shoulder when up and down at tila may isang napakatalim na punyal ang tumarak sa aking puso sinusugatan ito the pain was unbearable yung tiopong may sugat ka na tapos binuhusan pa ng muriatic acid it was like a double kill for me I was hurting beacsue he was hurting matapos kong hinatid si geum sa kwarto nagpaalam ako saglit to check on him. Dahan-dahan kong binuksan ang pinto he was no longer there bumaba ako mula sa ground floor ng condo na iniistayan ni Geum, I saw him in the parking lot. Hindi tinted ang saksakyan niya nakadukdok ang ulo niya sa manibela and his shouder are shaking so hard, napatakip ako sa bibig hiding those sibs and tears that are sheding in my eyes, hindi ako alam kung bakit ang bilis kong umiyak nasaskatan ako kasi nasasaktan ko siya. Umahon siya mula sa oagkakayukyok sa manibela as I can see disoriented siya he drove the car so fast na lalong nagpaalala sa akin mabilis kong nilabas ang cellphone at tinext si Bronze at Lefroy for him.
Pinunasan ko ang mga luha sa aking mga mata bago ko binalikan si Geum sa kanyang condo nakita kong dindampian niya ng bulak na may betadine ang mga sugat at pasa na gawa ni Evan sa kaniya I sigh
"sorry for that Geum" ani ko.
"it's okay Sil that was your husband?" aniya.
"y-yes"
"I see he is really handsome no wonder you were captured by him" aniya. Pabirong sinuntok ko siya,
"wag kang magdrama" ani ko.
"pero seryoso I envy him.. really at base sa ginawa niya sa akin mukhang mahal na mahal ka pa ng asawa mo ah" aniya,
Umiling ako "hindi iyon in love sa akin sa kay ate Gold she was his first love" sabi ko.
"are you sure?" tanong niya at kesa sagutin ang tanong niya iniba ko na langang usapan naming.
I texted Cy if she is okay she replied a witty one answer.
Cy:
Enjoy the moment with a oppa's yay! sistah pakilala mo naman ako hahaha don't worry about me enjoy there okay night! Lab yow!
~
"STOP THAT YOU MONSTER!!!!"
"STOP THAT YOU MONSTER!!!!"
"STOP THAT YOU MONSTER!!!!"
"STOP THAT YOU MONSTER!!!!"
"STOP THAT YOU MONSTER!!!!"
Tinungga ko ang alak na hawak sabay tawa at napapailing na lang ng wala sa oras. Nababaliw na ako I was laughing outside pero durog na durog na ako sa loob, may kumatok sa pinto I hera his shoes narinig ko pa ang pagbuntong hininga nito.
"what's up Dude" he said tumabi sa akin sabay bukas ng isang lata ng can beer
"what are you doing here?" matamlay na tanong ko.
"heard .on the news I came here to the rescue dude you know youre number one moral supporter" aniya.
"I caught her hugging him so tight" mahinang sabi ko.
"dude naman yakap lang eh,baka friendly hug lang walang malisya" anito.
"friendly hug? Tss! she was all over happy dude kitang kita ko yung kislap ng mata niya yung yakap niya ng mahigpit sa gagong iyon,"tila batang sumbong ko dito.
"hindi naman siguro dude kilala nating pareho si Bree lalo ka na remember she was your girl bestfriend"sabi niya,
"n-ngayon ko na realize I lost the woman who loved me dearly Froy. I lost her ang sakit... it hurt me so bad, I lost her and I think I can't no longer handle this froy I was slowly losing my self "
"don't f*****g tell it to me Evan, do you take your meds or you stop it!?" galit niya ng tanong sa akin ngayon.
"I belive I don't need that anymore froy.."ani ko sabay tawa ng mapakla
"tado mo Evan I am telling you.! ako mimso ang magdadala sayo sa rehab ulit why didn't stop taking your meds!" singhal nito sa akin.
"what for? What's the use of my life, if my life was already happy with her new one," sabay tungga ko sa iniinom I grab another one and open it.
"dammit Evan! Gago ka ba! Huh?"
"I am, kaya nga ako iniwan remember?" tawa ko sabay ng luhang tumulo na naman.so fiucking gay but who cares kami bang mga lalaki di pwedeng umiyak? Nasasaktan ako eh.
"seryoso ako Evan tss! tado mo! Depression and anxiety can kill you dude?! I am telling you"
"be it! i was actualy wishing for it,.... now, I am useless and worthless here Dude, I want to end this pagod na rin naman ako sa sakit ko na to "
"don't think a suicidal thought Evan f**k you s**t ka talaga, ilang taon mo tong pinaglalaban! Tapos ngayon ka pa susuko!" aniya
"I told you I lose it dude," sabay hinga ko ng malalim thinking how can I moved on again on my life parang ayaw ko ng mabuhay.
"no! your wrong, umayos ka nga!" singhal niya sa akin.
It was been 10 years ago... when I first encounter this panick and anxiety attack that lead to depression I was diagnose to have this I was been kidnapped that time tortured and been slave rape by someone older by my years and she was a girl can you read that a girl dominated me I was her submissive. I treat her as an older sister and I never thought she would do such thing to me. kaya mula noon ayoko ng pinapangunahan ako lalo na ang I under ako ng isang babae I hate to tell this to anyone ayoko ng pakiramdam na mas na ooverpower ako ng babae I felt ashamed and at the same time I feel so low para akong asong ulol na sunod ng sunod lang sa kaniya noon,. That's why when I was being fooled to marry her feeling ko na ooverpower na naman ako ng isang babae unti-unti my anxiety and panick lead to depression resulting to mental health was eating me alive by this enemy of mine again. Kailangan ko pang maglasing tuwing gabi in order for me to sleep quietly but everytime I was going home drunk and I would find her seating on the couch nakahalukipkip ang braso at hinihintay ang pagdating ko katulad na katulad sa bangungot na sampung taon ko ng nililibing sa hukay, it make me triggered to the extent I was hurting her by my words and my actions,. Kung alam lang niyang hindi naman talaga ako nambabae na ginagawa ko lang excuse si Gold dahil ayaw kong malaman niya at kaawaan ako sa nangyari sa akin when we first have our wedding i know she will be the one I was going to marry pero natakot ako natakot akong mag iba ang pagtingin niya sa akin pag oras na malaman niya kaya naman pinilit ko ang sariling bigyan siya ng ibang dahilan para layuan ako ng sa ganoon maiiwasan ko ring masaktan siya but I was wrong dahil mas lalo ko palang nasaktan siya sa ginagawa ko, I was determined to get rid of her dahil ayokong madamay pa siya sa sakit kong ito I want to endure it alone I want to fight this mental health alone, ayokong maging pabigat sa kaniya kaya ginawa ko yung alam kong dapat in order for her to run away from me, pero hindi ko pala kaya isang araw pa lang na hindi ko siya nakikita parang mas lalo akong mababaliw.
And that's my cue to have a series of therapy to undergo rehab take meds and be serious with my life gusto kong ayusin hindi na para sa sarili ko para sa kaniya, I want to be the best man for him, kahit alam kong sirang sira na ako sa kaniya but it was much better than to lose her at all I promise myself to do anything just to have her again in me and it helps, nakakatulog na ako ng maluwag while hugging her at night no need to take meds I was at peace she was my peace. But hearing her calling me monster in my very face it was a shattering words, yung ilang taong binuno ko sa pakikipaglaban sa sakit na ito, parang biglang gumuho ng mabilis, the therapy the rehab the meds became all useless.... I was now a monster to him.. scaring her....and this monster in me is actually winning now.
"I am telling you dude, hindi pa ito ang katapusan mo," aniya, napatingin naman ako sa kaniya sabay bagsak ng mata ko sa alak na iniinom.
"cheer up daddy Evan! Little Evan or Bree is coming the way" aniya.
Mabilis na tila napawi ang aking lasing "What!!!????"
"heard it right dude happy father's day to you.daddy ka na, I should not be the one to tell you this but its true heard it from my mom" balita nito sa akin
Kelan lang pinangarap ko ito I want it so bad matagal ko ng plano iyon but my sicknees is hindrancing it,... but totoo ba?... "don't joke here around froy it isn't funny" seryosong sabi ko sa kaniya.
"I was not dude, buntis ang asawa mo kahit tanong mo pa sa mommy ko,kaya ang sinasabi ko sayo, don't f*****g give up!" aniya.
empressJIA
- Writer
