Make Her Mine in 50 Days

Chapter 3

“So, am I just gonna stare at you while you drink?” I asked Kiel when he just kept on drinking without telling me what his problem was.

He suddenly asked me to go out with him tonight. Just like me, Kiel doesn’t usually go to clubs and drink. I could tell that something was bothering him.

“I can’t understand myself.” He sounded problematic as he spat out those words. “It happened so fast. Is that even possible?”

I creased my forehead because I couldn’t understand what he was saying. “What do you mean?”

“I think I’m falling for a girl, Brendt. But I just met her,” he started to open up about his abrupt feelings. “I just met her but my system keeps on finding her. The feeling that you just can’t get enough of her.”

A certain image of a woman flashed inside my mind as he spoke up his feelings in detail, but I immediately freed myself from that enticing image.

Kiel frustratedly messed his hair up as he drank another shot. “Nababaliw na ata ako...” he muttered to himself.

My heart suddenly clenched as I remembered the past. Napabuntong hininga na lamang ako. Ayoko nang balikan ngunit alam kong mas maiintindihan ni Kiel ang nararamdaman niya kapag naglahad ako ng sarili kong karanasan.

When it comes to love, all the impossible can turn out to be possible. Love knows no impossibilities.

“It’s possible,” I stated.

“Paano mo naman nasabi?”

“That’s how I fell for Sandra before,” sabi ko naman. “The moment I saw her flashed a sweet smile that night—when I met her, she already caught my whole attention that made me approach her. And ever since that night, I just found myself kept on thinking about her for no specific reason. I had some kind of strong urge of wanting to see her. Her simple presence can make my day. But you’re right... nakakabaliw talaga.”

Parehas kaming binalot ng katahimikan. Hindi na nagsalita si Kiel matapos kong magkuwento. He knew that I didn’t want to dig any further if it’s about what Sandra and I had in the past.

When I decided to come back, I already prepared myself to face the reality that she wasn’t mine anymore. But even though I was prepared for it, reading Sean’s message made me realize that the preparations I did weren’t enough to shield myself from the possible pain that I might feel.

“Uhm, thank you. Aalis na po ako.”

With just a drop of the past, I completely forgot the dosage of present that I have. I forgot that I was inside the office with Xylia because of Sean’s message that got my full attention.

When I heard the door closed, I bravely opened his message and read it.

From: Sean

Brendt, it’s me, Sean. I need you to sign some papers for me, and I know that you already know what it is for. Please reply to your desired place, date and time. I’ll be waiting.

I certainly knew what papers he was talking about. It’s about changing Lyrae’s surname.

With a heavy sigh, I opened the last drawer on my table where I kept my things before I left. My heart felt like it was shot by a stone from a sling shot when I saw that the picture was still here.

It was my picture with Sandra and Lyrae. Our picture was displayed before on my table.

I took the picture with me and my phone as well before I went out of the office and found myself at the rooftop. I needed a serene place to think and more air for me to breathe. The office suddenly felt suffocating. Hindi kaya ng apat na sulok ng aking opisina na ikulong lahat ng aking pinapakawalang mga pakiramdam.

I lifted my hand to stare at our old picture. A tear fell from my eye the moment I sighed.

Alam kong hindi ako ang dapat na kasama nila sa litrato na ‘to. I was just a very lucky guy that destiny gave a chance to feel how it was like to be a part of their life. Sa loob ng limang taon na tumayo ako bilang natatanging lalaki sa buhay nilang dalawa ay wala akong pinagsisisihan, kahit na wala na sila sa akin ngayon.

“Sandra...” I stopped when a sob escaped from me. “Lyrae...” I bit my lower lip before I tried to talk to them through our photo that I was holding.

Tuwing naaalala ko ang mga nangyari noon ay napapatunayan ko lamang sa sarili ko na nakakulong pa rin ako sa nakaraan at hindi pa rin makakawala kahit na dalawang taon na ang nakakalipas.

The pain that I was feeling because of my love for her is like a frisbee. Every time that I tried to throw it away, it just kept on coming back and hitting me again.

Maybe I shouldn’t just throw it away. Maybe I should’ve given the frisbee to its real owner and let him keep it in his possession.

Bumuntong hininga naman ako at pinalis ang lumalandas ng luha sa aking pisngi bago kinuha ang aking cellphone at tinawagan si Sean para gawin ang dapat na dati ko pang ginawa bago ako umalis.

“Hello?” he answered my call after a few rings. “Brendt...”

“Sean,” sambit ko sa pangalan kanyang pangalan bago muling huminga ng malalim. “Agenda-Crowne Plaza, Manila Galleria. 3PM sharp. I’ll meet you there tomorrow.”

I’m doing this not just for Sandra and Lyrae, but also for myself. I need to be free with any connection that I have with them, and this is the last one.