Chapter 1

1001 Words
RUN! RUN! That's all I can hear along with my heart pounding in my ears. I try to obey, but I'm frozen in place. Paralyzed by fear. BEEP, BEEP, BEEP! I woke with a jolt, covered in sweat. I lay there trying to slow down my breathing and calm my racing heart. It was just another nightmare or was it a memory? It's 4:30 in the morning. I hate waking up this early, but I have no other choice than working two jobs, being a single mother of twins at twenty and living back home with mom, George (stepdad), my younger siblings Corey and Charolette. My older brother, Stewart, hasn't lived with us in a long time. How did all this come to be, you might ask? Well, let me explain myself to you. Hi, my name is Kathleen and I got married to the first boy to show me any bit of affection. I dropped out of school and moved to California shortly thereafter because he didn't trust me enough to be faithful to him while he was gone. I was made to uproot my life only to be isolated. I wasn't allowed to have friends or see family. He had nobody to question my meek and submissive ways. Nobody to call him out for the bruises that covered more than half of my body. Once I realized what I would be living with for the rest of my life, it was already too late. I was pregnant and with twins. Dylan was sure I had cheated because we had only been married for six months and I was on birth control. At least the physical abuse slowed down, but he ramped up the mental and emotional abuse. I stopped having to wear long sleeve shirts and hoodies in the heat of summer to cover all the bruises. He was smart and tried not to leave marks on my face or neck so he wouldn't get into trouble with the Marine Corp for spousal abuse. Like that would ever happen. I shake my head to clear my mind of thoughts and memories. Come on Kat, just breathe. I share the room with my one-year-old twins, Holden and Harper, due to all the rooms being full. I get up to check on them and find Holden wrapped around his sister just like they were in the womb. At one point, I did in fact try to separate them but Holden screamed bloody murder until I moved him back in with Harper and within minutes they were both fast asleep. At least I know that he will always be there to protect her from the evils of the world. I thank everything good and positive that is in this world that he has a protective soul and not that of a bully. I have one more glance at my two most prized possessions and grab my things for a shower. I try to be as silent as possible so I don't wake them. As the water heats up, I look at my face and body in the mirror and notice I look far older than my twenty years on this planet. -Flashback- I hear the same words that I had gotten so used to hearing that I was just numb to it anymore. God Kathleen, why did I ever marry you? I learned a long time ago to keep my mouth shut and to keep my head down. You are worthless Kathleen! Just better for everyone involved. You can't even keep this place clean for crying out loud! Tell me why I shouldn't just kick you and those brats growing inside of you on the curb? That's what always gets me and he knows I will always fight back for my kids. Smack!!!! Atta girl. I love it when you show a little fire in your eyes. After a few blows that I know will leave marks, I feel his breath on my cheek. Remember, little girl, I own you and those little brats inside of you. I can do what I want when I want and you can't stop me. - End Flashback- I find myself looking in the mirror yet not seeing my reflection because of the steam. Just a memory Kat. You're not back there again. It's going to be a very bad day. I can feel it. First the nightmare, now a flashback. Why is this happening again? I work both jobs today and I'm in a bad mood already. I can just feel the mama's fire in my eyes like it was that day all over again. I get into the lukewarm water and wash off all the negativity. How do I keep letting this happen? I'm normally locked up like Fort Knox but this crap slipped through. I always feel so dirty after an episode like this. As I rinse my hair, I hear my little boy over the monitor just babbling away and then I hear My Coco My Coco. His version of my brother's name. At four months old, that being his first word, my brother still brings it up. Now mama's sweet angel Harper is a different story. She was born deaf due to me being pushed down the stairs while I was pregnant. We have been studying ASL to help her and us understand what she wants and needs. Holden is even learning with her. Sometimes I think he is more aware of things. Of course, as soon as he hears Corey he breaks into a giggling fit.As I'm shutting off the water, I hear a softer giggle. Well, Harper is up as well. Hello princess Harper, my brother signs to her. Of course, her brother answers for her. Me Coc she swept hard. So did me. I swear anything Corey says is the gospel. He has always been like a twin to me, even though we are years apart. He is defiantly my other half in a sibling kind of way.
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