His Secret Palace

“It’s a lot of information to take in at first, right? Did you copy all that?” “I think it’s all pretty clear.” Margaret looks very confident as she nods her head. She’s the one who recruited me. “Great! So you won’t be a time waster! Speed and precision are vital qualities in a concierge, even a junior one.” Everywhere I look, all I see is pure luxury… the floors, walls, ceilings, furniture, doorknobs… I wouldn’t be surprised if the toilet was made of solid gold! Absolutely nothing has been left to chance. It’s all perfect, chrome-plated or glossy. Today is my first day, so there’s no room for error. I know nothing about concierge work (despite what I said…) All I know is that I have to meet the needs of the wealthy hotel guests here… I’ll have to book their taxis, manage their dinner reservations and solve their everyday problems. Basically, I have to make sure they want for nothing and that their stay is perfect. “The Secret Palace has sixty rooms in total, eight of which are our deluxe suites, so you won’t have time to be idle. You’ll be treated exactly like other one hundred and twenty hotel employees.” Margaret explains the inner workings of the Secret Palace as she walks me down the lobby. I almost feel like I’m in the army. But… with extra bling! The suits are all names after gemstones. I know precious stones are extravagant, but it’s not exactly very original, is it? If I was in charge, I’d have chosen to name them after movie stars. The Greta Garbo Suite… or Burt Lancaster… or Marlon Brando… I can just imagine the Marilyn Monroe Suite… with a huge portrait of Kennedy on the wall and antidepressants in the drawer of the bedside table. I suppose that would be less fancy. But this is Los Angeles! They don’t do things by half-measures in La-La Land! So many stars must have stayed here since the fifties… “Hello? Are you still with me? I hope you’re not another starry-eyed dreamer, Meridian! We get a lot of them around here!” Touché! “Why are you here?” Margaret asks further. “I want to satisfy clients because that’s my… thing?” I didn’t know what to say as I was unprepared with this question. “No! If a guest comes to you with a problem, you’ve done your ‘thing’ wrong. Understand? You have to anticipate their requests before they even know they have one! That’s what doing this ‘thing’ is all about.” “I’ll do my best, Mrs. Lawrence. You can rest assured.” “I’ll be here to make sure you do. But call me Margaret, please. I’m as much an employee as you are. I’m not a guest.” I nod. Margaret isn’t as cold as I first thought. “Let’s get started! Mr. Kauffman is staying in our Emerald Suite. He’s out bathing on the hotel’s private beach as we speak. I noticed he forgot his bathrobe. Please bring him one! And be quick about it!” “I’ll take care of it right away!” I turn around and walk confidently to the reception desk. I want to look like I know what I’m doing in front of the head concierge. But I have no idea where the laundry room is! I don’t even know where the beach is, let alone what this Mr. Kauffman even looks like! Anyways I decide to figure it out. I’m sure it’s not a rocket science! The guests all manage to find their way around just fine. There must little placards with arrows pointing to the beach. And I’m sure there are signs on the doors for the staff. Mr. Kauffman needs a bathrobe… okay! I just hope he doesn’t want me to put sunscreen on him too! I know I have to make a good impression, but… I really don’t want to get fired before I’ve even started! I can see a colleague over there… he might be able to help me. “Hi! It’s Damian, right?” “Right.” “You’re a newbie, too? Let’s help each other out! Wouldn’t that be great? I’m looking for Mr. Kauffman… and where’s the laundry room again?” Damian looks me up and down. He looks pretty pissed. “You’re a junior concierge. I’m a concierge.” I could give him a sarcastic comeback, but it wouldn’t help me in my current predicament. I’d better just keep my mouth shut. Remember to keep a low profile, Mer! “But I’ll help you… the laundry room is that way. It’s signposted on the door. So… unless you can’t read, you should be able to find it.” Great! We’ve only been talking for about thirty seconds and he’s already being super nasty to me. He’s a real diva! I start walking towards one of the service doors, but Damian calls me back. Did he forget to tell me something? “As for Mr. Kauffman… I have to tell you… he’s… um… special. He doesn’t like to be helped. You’ll have to really sell the robe! He’s wearing a green blazer.” “Thanks! It was real nice of you to help me. I owe you one!” I flash him a smile and run to the laundry room as fast as I can. I walk down the service hallway and stop at a half-open door. It’s the laundry room! It’s written on the door just like Damian said! I step inside and grab a bathrobe from a pile that must have come straight out of the dryer. Now all I have to do is find the beach! After following a signposted route, I find myself wandering among the deckchairs. I can’t see anyone wearing blazer… Where’s the goddamn green blazer? I’ve been walking up and down this sand so long. I can feel it sinking into my socks! I finally see the jacket! It’s laid out on a seat. Now all I have to do is find the owner! I look out onto the water. There’s a man swimming up and down the beachfront. He looks to be the only one out there… He’s going at breakneck speed despite the swirling waves. I have to admit that I’m pretty impressed! You’d have to be very athletic to feel that comfortable in the ocean. Maybe this Mr. Kauffman is an Olympic champion… For some reason, I imagined him being a lot older. But the guy looks like he’s a model or some kind of professional sportsman. Well, hello there, Mr. Kauffman! I try to stand there looking as dignified as possible with the robe in my hand. I hope he’s not going to be swimming out there all day! I’m out in the boiling hot sun in a concierge’s uniform. This might be about to get sweaty. The man suddenly stops doing laps and makes his way back to the beach. It’s as if he read my thoughts. He swims towards me. When he gets close to the shore, he stands up. His shoulders come out of water, followed by his dazzling chiseled pecs… The waves hit him in the back, but he doesn’t waver. He strides back to land with an assertive gait. He looks like some sort of Greek God rising out of the ocean in slow motion. I watch as the water trickles down his body… I’m single, but I’m not the kind of girl who eyeballs every guy who walks by. But the man in front of me right now is... extraordinary. I feel like time is standing still… or running out slowly. Very slowly… He puts his hand on his head to pull his hair back. he exudes masses of self-assurance. Not many people have that. His gaze is very intense… as he walks straight towards me, my heart rate speed up. Big time. I can’t help but stare at his perfectly sculpted body. I mean, it’s not like my mouth is wide open or anything. He doesn’t know what I’m thinking. I hope! Just the sight of him electrifies me. I’m starting to get all hot and bothered. I’m pretty sure it’s nothing to do with the sun… or the clothes I’m wearing. I smile at him as I hold out the robe. He seems surprised to see me there… “What are you doing, miss?” I stretch out one of the arms so he can put it on more easily. I keep a smile plastered on my face even though it doesn’t look like he has any intention of putting on this robe. “The entire staff at the Secret Palace is here to satisfy your every desire sir.” My God! That sounds like something a call girl would say! Mr. Kauffman smiles back at me. Phew! I think I’m on the right track! “My every desire? I didn’t ask for that level of service. You’re new, I take it?” “Is it that obvious? I thought I was doing quite well…” “Don’t worry! You’re doing just fine.” I guess he’s talking about the way I’m holding the robe? I just wish he’d take the damn thing! I dangle the robe in front of him and shake it about a little. He doesn’t seem to understand it’s for him. “No, thank you! I don’t need it.” Damian told me he wouldn’t want any help and I guess he was right. I watch as water droplets start beading all over his body. He really should take the robe. I can’t leave him just like this. If Margaret spots him without a robe on, I’ll get in trouble. “I insist sir. You’ll catch cold if you don’t slip this on.” “The whole idea was to freshen up, so I’d rather just stay like this.” He’s still a guest when all’s said and done. I can’t rush him too much. He might take it the wrong way. But if he doesn’t play ball, I’m going to get mad. “Come on, sir! Look how soft the fabric is. It’s so comfortable!” I take his hand in mine and place on the robe. “This is cotton satin. It’s one of the finest in the world! Can you feel that?” He stares at me as if I’m some kind of moron. He doesn’t say a word, but I watch as a slight smile forms at the corner of his mouth. “I’ve never felt anything so soft.” “You see? It’s much softer than your standard cotton. This was hand-woven in Sri Lanka.” Mr. Kauffman starts laughing. Did I say something stupid? Of course I said something stupid! I don’t know anything about fabric… I’ve just been making it all up! But how did he know? “I wasn’t talking about the Sri Lanka fabric, miss.” I let go of his hand. I feel a little awkward, but try not to let it show. I turn my head and look back toward the hotel. I spy Damian surrounded by some of the other members of the staff. They’re all laughing. He’s pointing at me… and I suddenly get it. He deliberately gave me duff information. It was all a trick! This guy’s not Mr. Kauffman! I’m so embarrassed about all this… I must have looked like such an i***t insisting he take the robe! And he didn’t tell me I was talking to the wrong person! I stop holding out the fabric for the fake Mr. Kauffman. I take another look at him. “I… You… You’re not Mr. Kauffman, are you?” The hot athlete gives me a disarming smile. “No, but given how dedicated you are to pleasing him, I almost wish I was.” That was quite a funny line. I giggle a little. “Who are you if you’re not Mr. Kauffman? Tell me!” He glances at my body with intensity… and then looks me straight in the eye. “You’ll find out soon enough.” The mysterious stranger’s cell starts ringing and he sticks it to his ear with a serious look. He picks up his things without saying a single word to me and walks back to the hotel. He definitely thinks he’s a cut above the rest of us. I’m now standing on the beach with a bathrobe in my hands. I’m on my own… and I’m embarrassed because that man thought I was a weirdo. There’s no doubt about the fact he had real charisma. Not to mention his perfectly sculpted body. He understood right away that I must have made a mistake and had a bit of fun with the situation. But I guess there was nothing out of place or wrong with his attitude. I’m not sure he’s a guest though…. I hope I didn’t screw up too much. Another man comes out of the water. He’s in his sixties and has a full head of lush hair… he’s waving at me like crazy. Why didn’t I see him earlier? “Yoo-hoo! Have you got a bathrobe?” So this is the real Mr. Kauffman… He looks nothing like my mysterious stranger!