Chapter-4

1278 Words
‘Take care of yourself, dry yourself up as soon as you reach home, you might catch cold.’ A message appeared on my front screen before I reached home it was from Yosuf. This was the first time in my life when someone else was taking care of me and making me feel special. The uni was showing me various part of life which was hidden from me before. It felt good when someone was taking care of me but I felt like a wrong girl playing with someone feelings. I liked spending time with him. I liked him but when I think about love Asif face was dominant in my mind. It was almost impossible to get what I wanted in that situation but I couldn’t think of someone else other than him at that time. I never shared these things with Upisa, Angi, Mahma, and other girls but I was willing to do that with Yosuf. After watching television for half an hour I went to my room. Another message appeared on the screen. ‘I have reached home already, Are you fine,’ again it was Yosuf. ‘I am fine, don’t worry about me’ ‘I can’t help but worry about you’ ‘I wanted to talk to you about something’ ‘You can talk about anything with me’ ‘Not here, face to face tomorrow’ ‘then tomorrow morning we will be going on the same bus don’t be late this time’ ‘okay’ Then I kept the mobile on the side. Notification sound kept on humming but I clenched my heart not to pick up that mobile. My heart was unstable, doing assignments that time was worthless and sleep was not coming to me. I hurried for my headphone and stabilized it on my ears. ‘I hung the phone tonight Something happened for the first time deep inside it was a rush, what a rush’ Crush by David was playing on the headphone and for the first time, I was trying to understand the lyrics and apply it on my mess life. Yes, something was happening to me for the first time, the moment I saw Asif on the admission counter came in front of my eyes. I pictured me with him and went with the flow of the song. When I woke up it was dark outside, I wasn’t willing to eat anything so I didn’t go to the kitchen. I just sat on the bed and pulled my mobile. 8 messages from Asif Rauf and 3 from Yosuf. ‘Horror’ again came to me. I hurried into the inbox. Asif was trying to contact me for one hour. I regretted abandoning the mob, ‘I am sorry, I don’t know when I fell asleep’ ‘It’s okay, I was willing to finish physics assignment but the numerals are out from my limit, can you help me with it’ ‘Yes, why not. I have already finished that part’ ‘then can I call you?’ ‘yes, sure’ no matter it was for the reason of study but at least he was willing to talk to me, that was a great thing to make my day better. In less than a minute, he called me. I rushed to pick up the call. “hello” His sound on my ear was producing little butterfly on my stomach. ‘yes, I am here’, I said hiding my enthusiasm ‘I have already found the value of theta now onward you have to guide’ We talked for nearly an hour but not a single word was out from the syllabus, don’t expect more i***t my mind was shouting at me but the butterfly remained till the last. Piling up some courage I asked him, ‘have you had your dinner yet?’ ‘Yeah, what about you?’ ‘no’ ‘why not?’ ‘No appetite’ ‘Okay, now it’s late goodnight’ and the call was cut. I didn’t even get a chance to reply to him goodnight. Anyway, I was happy then. The next morning according to the plan I and Yosuf went on the same bus. He had reserved a seat next to him for me and in his hand, there was a hot chocolate. As soon I reached there he handed me the cup. ‘it’s for you’ ‘Why do you had to buy this so early in the morning’ ‘you were wet yesterday, I thought this might make you feel good’ ‘thank you, I love it’ I was emotional at that time, holding back my tears. It was already 2 months since I got into uni but Yosuf was the only person with whom I found my comfort. I wanted to clear things to him but wasn’t ready to lose the most amazing person I had ever met. ‘What happened to you? you look pale’ ‘Nothing, I am just happy I have this’ ‘If I had known you like hot chocolate so much I would have brought it to you from the beginning’ I couldn’t tell him what I wanted at that time. We just went to the collage together and part for our respective classes. On the lunchtime me, Asma, Punkuj, and Asif were sitting on the ground. ‘Do you know, Asif has a beautiful voice, he sang to me yesterday in bus’, said Asma I was like on fire of jealousy. How could he do something like that to Asma and only talk about study to me? ‘Really, then we have to hear it now’, added Punkuj ‘No, I am bad at it. Asma is just bragging’ ‘Am not bragging, he has a sweet voice’ I was just angry and silence when I lift my head I saw Asif was looking at me too ‘Should I?’, he said looking at me I nodded my head ‘I hung up the phone tonight something happened for the first time’ My favorite song from his mouth, what could I ask god for more. All the anger, jealousy just flowed away I was just flowing on his tone, his voice which was melodious and sweet. ‘Do you ever think when you’re all alone All that we can be, where this thing can go’ He was looking at me. His eyes penetrating my heart. Our eyes met and time froze but his song didn’t stop ‘Am I crazy or falling in love? Is it real or just another crush?’ I just hoped there were no one around, but my flow stopped when he again took his eyes toward Asma separating from mine, I closed my eyes and again hear him sing imagining I was the only one there, and he was singing the song just for me. ‘Do you like it?’, asked Asif while we were returning to the class. ‘More than I expected’ He just smiled and went inside. While returning home, Yosuf asked me about the thing I wanted to talk to him yesterday. As Upisa was absent that day it was only me and him. ‘It’s not important’, I said hesitantly ‘I know, you wanted to talk about something serious, tell me’ ‘it’s not what you think Yosuf’ ‘You said you are comfortable with me, then what happened that you are hiding something from me’ ‘I am not you are the best person I have ever met, Yosuf but..’ ‘But what?’ ‘I think I am in love with Asif’, my heartfelt on ease after throwing the sentence from my mouth. I couldn’t look at Yosuf, I hung my head and waited for him to reply. But he just walked away without talking I walked behind him, I couldn’t look at him, and he wasn’t looking at me the whole way. When I get down from the bus I looked up at the window where Yosuf was sitting. He was looking away from me, he looked pale and his eyes they showed he was hurt. I lost him tears were rolling down from my eyes. I lost one of the best people in my life, life would have been so much better if we had been a best friend always not more than that ever. I returned home. No message came from him. That day I was willing to get Yosuf’s message more than Asif’s.
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