Does the Moon Goddess Hate Me, Too?

1380 Words
Cindra’s POV The warm glow of the chandeliers danced over the sea of nobles, catching the sequins on glittery gowns and slicked-back hair. My eyes roamed over their faces, my stomach tightening into a knot. With one foot in the ballroom and the other in the hallway, I took a deep breath, only one thought invading my mind.. I shouldn’t be here. Tensions between the four kingdoms had prevented a Ball in the last several years, which made this one even more significant than any others. Nobles from every kingdom, Winter Harvest, Ember Moon, Howling Winds, and Erupting Eclipse, had gathered here in hopes of finding the one destined for them. For someone like me, it was the best and perhaps only chance I would ever have at freedom, yet I didn’t feel the excitement or hope that I should have. Finally stepping inside, I scanned the room, watching nobles twirl and chat with each other, and felt more like an outsider, an imposter, a fake than I ever had before. I clenched my hands together in the deep sapphire fabric of my temporarily stolen gown and tried to push down my sense of anxiety. I do belong here. No matter what anyone else has led me to believe. No matter the circumstances of my anything-but-noble life. My inner pep talk went quiet as whispers broke out around me. “Can you believe she showed up?” “Where did she find a dress like that?” “Look at how filthy her shoes are.” I winced as the whispers turned into giggles, ducked back toward the edges of the room, and paused to glance around. I couldn’t place the source of the voices, but I recognized one of them as my cousin’s. The Azer family of Ember Moon Pack was hosting this event. I had heard that King Olwen of the Winter Harvest Pack was the one who suggested the Ball be revived, but it was my uncle who had insisted that it be held here in Ember Moon. I looked over at him, King Flint, sitting on a dais in the front of the room. His green eyes almost glowed in the dark room, his dark hair making him look younger than he truly was. I tried not to stare, hoping he didn’t notice me, but it was hard to look away from him. He commanded the room, whether I liked it or not. He commands me, too, I thought glumly. It made no sense for him to host the Ball here, not even for a show of wealth. His wife, Queen Bridget, loved to be the center of attention but hated doing any work, especially if it meant I could benefit from it. Her red hair was twisted up in some elegant knot I was sure was meant to upstage anyone else in the room. Her face was as striking as ever. The pair of them were certainly in control, despite the other royals bustling about. The lingering sneering, haughty superiority in their gazes was unmistakable as they took us all in like we were ants about to find ourselves under their expensive leather shoes. For a moment, Queen Bridget looked in my direction. The serene elegance vanished, replaced by a deep, hatred-filled scowl. I looked down, noticed the grime on my shoes, blushed in embarrassment, and tucked my feet deeper under the skirt of my dress. Keeping my gaze averted, I turned my back on the king and queen. I didn’t need to confirm that she hated me or even get a preview of the screeching I would hear later. Nor did I need to confirm that Flint couldn’t even tolerate the sight of me. And part of me wondered often who could blame them. What did I have to offer? I took a deep breath, wandering through the crowd, trying to get lost, but I stuck out like a sore thumb, my white hair and light blue eyes such a sharp contrast to everyone else in my pack. My mother, the king’s sister, Princess Asha, had been a redhead with the same jade eyes as the king. How did I end up like this? I had no idea. It wasn’t the only thing that was different about me. My packmates could manipulate fire. All members of Ember Moon had been blessed with that ability by the Moon Goddess. But not me. I had no special power. I hadn’t even met my wolf. By the age of twenty-one, I should’ve been able to shift. Cutting between a few people who were standing around the dance floor, I heard more familiar whispers. “There she is,” someone said. “The princess who killed her mother.” I changed directions, attempting to avoid the looks and laughter. Kalinda, one of my cousins, stood laughing in a circle of her friends, dressed in a new gown from a tailor I could never hope to purchase a dress from. She, Brenton, Conley, and Aiden all possessed the same arrogance and confidence as their parents. Kalinda took one of her friends by the hand, twirling around, her red hair fanning out behind her. Stepping around someone, I headed back to the perimeter of the dance floor. I found myself instinctively looking for Helio, the eldest of my cousins, the crown prince of Ember Moon, and one of the worst tormentors of my life. Was he here? If so, would he seek me out and ridicule me in front of everyone? Not seeing him was probably the only blessing the Goddess had seen fit to give me. That feeling of relief shattered when I caught sight of his dark hair and the gleaming gold that trimmed the shoulders of his suit. I’d recognize his sense of style and the red-gold cord that marked him as the crown prince anywhere. Spoke too soon. He swept past me, whirling around on the dance floor with a young woman in his arms. She had a head of neat, coppery curls, and their outfits clashed horribly in style and color. As they turned, I realized the woman was Kora Zephyr, daughter of King Pilan of the Howling Winds Pack. My mouth dropped open as a question took shape in my mind. Were they mates? My stomach clenched uncomfortably, even as I almost scoffed. Helio would probably grow irritated with her within a few hours, yet knowing that didn’t ease the discomfort I felt at the thought. I had grown up with Helio’s taunts, his sneering, and his cruelty. Some part of me hoped he was at least half as miserable as he’d made me over the years at discovering the outspoken Kora was his mate, but another part of me didn’t know how to feel about it. I couldn’t deny that Helio was an impressive figure. At twenty-three, he had matured into a strong and imposing man. His dark hair framed his face, and his eyes had a way of sparkling in the light like water made of emerald shards. Sharp, beautiful, and dangerous. His gaze often tempted me to wade into the depths, but I knew I’d be torn to pieces on his cruel edges. As they danced, a surge of conflicting emotions washed over me. A pang of jealousy gripped my heart. If Helio, who had only ever been cruel to me, deserved to find his mate, didn’t I? Or did even the Goddess hate me? The thought left me cold and shaken. And again, the thought hit me, ringing through my mind as clear as day. I shouldn’t be here. Suddenly, Helio turned, and our eyes met. A bolt of electricity shot right through me, making my breath catch in my throat. I couldn’t look away. He stared back, his nostrils flaring slightly in a look of either sheer disgust or enticement. In that brief moment, our connection felt more powerful and confusing than ever before. But then, someone stepped between us, and when they moved, Helio was gone, the connection broken. I scanned the crowd, trying to find him again, feeling a tug from the very center of my being. My eyes locked on another pair across the dance floor from me, and only one word filled my mind. Mate.
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