Sweet Surrender

Chapter 1- Part 3

PAGBALIK ko sa "Dream Mugs" ay agad akong kumuha ng slice ng chocolate cake at sunod-sunod ang ginawa kong pagsubo. What a day! It may not be obvious because I am good at hiding my emotions, but I must admit, Kevin Carlos Madrigal still gives me butterflies in my stomach.

I'm not pakipot, okay?

Do you think it was easy for me to refuse his dinner invitation? No, it wasn't! Like hell, not! But I had to! I know him very well. Like what I have said already, he is one big devil-may-care casanova parehong-pareho sila ni Kenzo Salameda. The two of them give a perfect meaning of the saying "Two birds of the same feather flock together".

I don't want to start on something that I know would bring me into a situation which I never want to be in the first place.

Advance lang ako mag-iisip.

Why? Because Madrigal doesn't commit himself to any woman in general.

I don't want to be left with a broken heart and crying in one corner of my room pitying myself because I get dumped. Which will surely happen when he already gets what he wants and has enough of it.

Noong wala pang gulong nangyayari sa pagitan ng mga best friends namin. I heard him once say, "Girlfriend? Wife? Nah, they're not for me. I don't want a drama in my life. Women are all the same. They want to show the world that they are in control. They want to take over your life and demand so much time as if your life is theirs. That's a big NO for me in capital letters. Believe me, women are a big cost of a great headache. And why would I choose to stay with one girl when I can easily have them all at once?"

Those words I heard from his mouth serve as a big warning not to entertain his attention and flirtation towards me.

Kevin Carlos Madrigal is the perfect balance of danger and charm. A man possessing strength and strong character, utterly attractive in an enticing and forbidden way. I can either choose to drown in a big s**t or run away while I can. I am choosing what I think is good for my heart--- and that is to stay away from his notorious charm!  

Our personalities are contrary. He is a very outgoing person while I'm the old school type. He doesn't believe in love and commitment while I value my dignity as a woman. I promised just to give myself to a man whom I will call my husband. And Kevin Carlos Madrigal has no plans to be called any woman's husband.

Sa lalim ng iniisip ko ay hindi ko na napansin ang paglapit sa akin ng matalik kong kaibigan na si Chantal.

"Ipapasalvage na ba natin?" nagbibirong tanong niya sa akin habang ibinababa niya ang dalawang tasa ng paborito naming cappuccino sa mesa at naupo sa upuan sa harap ko.

"Bes, nandito ka pala," medyo gulat kong turan. Masyado yatang napalalim ang iniisip ko ng dahil lang sa simple dinner invitation kuno ni Madrigal.

"Actually kanina pa. Ano bang iniisip mo at sobrang lalim naman yata?" concerned niyang tanong. "Hito panulak, baka mabilaukan ka pa diyan sa kinakain mo."

Yes she is definitely my best friend. She knows me very well.

"Wala naman... na stress lang ako sa traffic," I said, smiling. "How 'bout you, what are you doing here?" pag-iiba ko ng usapan.

"Well I'm waiting for your dear cousin. May date kami at sinabi ko sa kanyang dito niya ako sunduin."

Oo nga pala boyfriend ni Chantal ngayon ang pinsan kong si Arthur.

Gusto ko sanang sabihin sa kanya na nakita ko si Kenzo Salameda kanina at narito na pala ulit ito sa Pilipinas. Si Kenzo ay ang first love ni Chantal na nanloko sa kanya. Ang lalaking iniyakan niya ng ilang timbang luha.

Huwag na lang. Baka masira ko pa ang araw niya at ayaw kong mangyari 'yon. May date pa naman sila ni Arthur.

"Do you think may plano na ang pinsan kong mag propose sayo?" I asked. Sana naman magpakasal na sila. Matagal-tagal narin naman ang relasyon nila.

Ngayon kasing bumalik na ng bansa si Salameda, ayaw ko mang isipin--- pero nag-aalala talaga ako sa kung ano ang mararamdaman ni Chantal kapag nakita niya ulit si Salameda. Saksi ako kung gaano siya minahal ni Chantal. Nakikita ko naman na masaya si Chantal kay Arthur ngayon pero hindi ako sigurado kong tuluyan na nga bang nawala ang nararamdaman niya para sa two timer na si Kenzo. Hindi naman kasi namin yon napag-uusapan bilang respeto sa relasyon nila ng pinsan ko.

"Marriage proposal? Malabo, bes. Sa sobrang busy ng pinsan mo ngayon sa business nila. I don't think he has a plan." Naramdaman ko ang pagtatampo sa boses niya.

Kahit kailan talaga napaka bagal ng pinsan ko na 'yon! Ang sarap batukan minsan. Sobrang kupad. Dinaig pa ang pagong.

"If ever mag propose siya, will you say yes?" curious kong tanong. I'm fishing an answer that gives me an assurance sa totoong nararamdaman niya sa pinsan ko.

"Tayka nga bakit bigla ka naman yata nagtatanong ng ganyan? Is there something I don't know?" natatawang turan ni Chantal at uminom ng cappuccino sa tasa niya.

"No,no no... nothing." With a hand gesture. "I'm just curious. Kasi naman diba medyo matagal narin naman kayo. Eh syempre saan pa ba ang punta nyo kundi sa kasalan, diba? Saka excited na akong maging bridesmaid noh at maging ninang na rin ng magiging inaanak ko sa inyo."

"Wow ha. Ang advance," natatawa na wika ni Chantal.

"Abah syempre excited na akong sabihin sayo ang mga katagang "welcome to the family". Kaya bilis bilasan niyo na noh."

"Well... minsan napapag-usapan naman namin pero not really serious. Tsaka you know naman din that your tita Eliza doesn't really like me. Medyo kinukuha ko pa ang loob niya."

Oo nga pala. Hindi pala boto kay Chantal ang Mommy ni Arthur which is my tita Eliza nga, kapatid siya ng Mommy ko. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ayaw niya kay Chantal. Eh  mabait naman itong bestfriend ko, maganda, matalino at galing din naman sa may sinabing pamilya.

"Nako huwag mong pansinin si Tita, what's important is how you feel for each other. At the end of the day kayo naman ni Art ang masusunod dahil buhay niyo naman 'yan at kayo naman ang magsasama."

Kilala ko ang tita Eliza ko. Walang good enough na babae sa kanya na babagay para kay Arthur. Siguro ganun lang yata talaga ang mga ina. No one is perfect for their beloved children. Sumosobra ngalang at plano yatang gawing matandang binata ang pinsan ko.

She is a total opposite of my Mom. My Mom is calm and very good listener. She never tried controlling my life or any of my siblings. She always supports us and telling us that she trust our choices and decisions. Unlike Arthur's Mom, kulang na lang talian sa leeg ang mga anak niya at gawing aso at gagawin lang kung ano ang gusto niya.

"Bakit pakiramdam ko ay gusto mo na akong mag-asawa? Para kang si Daddy, tanong ng tanong kung kailan ako magpapakasal. Like duh, I'm only 25... I'm not that old para magmadali."

"Yes but you're not getting any younger din naman," I told her with a teasing smile.

"Wow ha! How about you? Kailan mo balak mag boyfriend? You're pushing me to get married but you, yourself don't even have a boyfriend."

I laughed. "I just haven't found my Mr. Right yet," I said it with matching kibit balikat.

"E paano mo naman mahahanap kung hindi ka naman lumalabas. You don't even entertain your suitors. You don't date and give time to your suitors to get to know them."

"I don't have time. I'm always busy here. Dream Mugs needs 101% of my attention."

"Ano 'yon. Itong Dream Mugs nalang ang papakasalan mo?"

"Why not? I'm happy with what I have now. I don't need headache. Sakit lang sa ulo ang mga lalaki. Man these days are just full of sweet words. Pero kapag nakuha na nila ang tiwala mo at isinuko ang Bataan, wala na. Goodbye na."

"Saan ang logic, you want me to get married na pero ikaw, kahit bf ay ayaw mo kasi sakit lang sa ulo?"

I smiled. "Syempre I'm pretty sure naman kasi na hindi ka sasaktan ng pinsan ko. Mahal na mahal ka kaya niyon. Tsaka ang cute na, faithful pa."

"I know that," Chantal smiled genuinely. "I love him too."

Sa sinabi ni Chantal ay para akong nabunutan ng tinik sa dibdib. Masaya akong marinig na mahal niya rin ang pinsan ko. At sa tingin ko her feelings for Salameda was really over. And that makes me even happier.