Your Voice (G x G)

2

Summer went by like a flash. But like an out of place hair sticking out at one place, my memory of Sara and the immensely vague night stuck out more than I have wanted. I've spent most of the summer trying hardly to get a tan and a peace of mind about James, every day was constant. But then out of the blue I meet an attractive lady who changes everything. I mean everything.

After the kiss, I've been leaching on to every possibility that I might actually like women. That was big news for me, which I'm still trying to work out and wrap my head around. I didn't actually like the thought of me with another girl. I undeniably liked the kiss... but to like, like a girl - I just don't know.

Thankfully, the doubt, the sadness, and Sara were all left behind in that beach. I was ready to face senior year head on. I've proven myself to be ballsy and I didn't settle for intimidation or fear. I'll make sure that when I cross with James he won't even see a sign of the girl he dumped, just the brand new Allie.

"Hey!" Jillian screeches at me, bringing me back to reality.

"Hey." I reply in an annoyed tone.

"Oooh, someone's a bit grumpy today. I missed you, girl, and I love what you did to your hair! It's so chic." She wraps me up in a bear hug, it was good to see my best friend after all the stuff that has been happening.

"Not that, you kind of just killed my moment. Anyway, how was your summer?"

We walk through the hall to our newly assigned lockers which are next to each other, "Ugh," she sighs, "incredibly boring! I didn't know spending summer away in the mountains would go from exciting to dry and dead in a snap." Jillian started to make a puppy dog face.

"There was no reception, wasn't there?"

She nods slowly, "No WIFI connection either." I gasp for effect, "If I had, you know I would be calling you twenty-four seven. I mean you needed me, after all what James did to you. How are you holding up by the way?" Her red hair busted to the side and her green eyes filled with sympathy.

"Well, I held. I had all summer to mope around and be sad." It was true, "But I felt good the last week of it, made decisions and promises. I'm... exploring myself." It was true too.

"Okay," she put on one of her empathetic smiles, "it's good to know you're alright. I'll be devastated if Toby did that to me. I mean, I know he wouldn't, he's a good guy and all but still." I grunted and we walked to our first class. "So, what are your plans? Do you keep on dating or just saddle up the horse for a while?"

I had the urge to tell her about Sara, the confusion about my sexuality was consuming me it was a burden to bear. "Actually I think I'll take a break from all that stuff for now." We made our way to the third row and took a seat. "I have a confession," I started and she asked what, "my mom and I went to the beach to spend the last week of summer, and I met... someone." I stirred clear through any pertaining detail about my confusion.

Like an excited child, Jillian started to flush, "Oh my goodness, summer fling. Sounds hot. Was he gorgeous? Did you guys kiss? Oh god just tell me."

"Okay, this person's name is-" *Riiiiing* The bell sounds to signify the start of classes. 

I sit tightly and straight, Jill pokes me and whispers, "Come on tell me first, no one cares about that stupid bell."

My head titled a bit to the side then I shrugged, "The name-"

"Sara Blake." I was startled for a second and Jillian took notice of this. She bolted her head to the front where the blackboard should be. The voice came from a petite female in front, she wore heels which made her a bit taller. The lady had dark hair, I couldn't make out the face because her back was turned from us. Her hand quickly chalked out a messy handwriting which I read as Sara Blake.

"Oh my god." I whispered to myself. As the lady turned around to face the class, her face revealed, I was shocked shitless. "Oh my god." I say with a higher tone, dropping my head from her sight so she wouldn't see me. "Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god."

Jill must have heard me freaking out all by myself because she eyes me subtly and mouths what the heck is wrong? I faked a grin so she would calm down-or maybe I should calm down.

"You can call me Ms. Blake." The voice pauses, maybe scanning the classroom. "I have a degree in Science, major in Chemistry, minor in Physics. I'll be your homeroom teacher for this year." Great, I thought, groaning in my mind. "Alright, let me read the class list for attendance... Adams, Matthew Adams."

"Here." The boy in front of me replied, making me jump in my seat.

She called another, "Andrews, Larry Andrews."

"Here."

And another, "Beatrice, Mary Jane Beatrice." Her method of checking was to read from the list, then scan the crowd for an answer, then instantly back to the list.

"Present." The girl had a squeaky little voice, it wasn't hearable. Sara-Ms. Blake called out again and the girl spoke louder.

"Okay, let's see..." Ms. Blake whispers as she gets back to her list. "Collins," she reads as though with familiarity, which I deeply feared. "Collins, Alisa Collins." I did not say 'here' or 'present', instead I said nothing.

"She's here!" Jill vouched for me, pointing at my direction. I have fully sunk down to my desk and I cannot go any further.

"Well, is she deaf or mute or what?" I heard heels make contact with the floor as she spoke.

Our distance grew smaller as she got closer and I knew my doom was inevitable so I just valiantly say "Here." As I look up to the beautiful lady before me, all I could feel was heat prickling my face.

"Oh," she said, hiding the shock in her face, I threw her an awkward smile, "Collins, sit properly." She walks back slowly to her desk, skims through her list, and then resumes the roll call.

Later on she discusses our syllabus for this year, carefully avoiding me and my row. For years I've stayed in the familiar faint blue painted classroom, I've never felt so uncomfortable and shocked and sweaty. She gave us an essay to write about what we know about the subject. I was racking my brain to concentrate on the paper, not to the girl I kissed last summer.

I manage to write two very short paragraphs about the given matter. The bell rings and Ms. Blake announces to place the paper on her desk. Jill pats me on the shoulder, my head was buried in my hands and was suffering a head ache. "Are you okay?" I assure her with I'm fine, telling her to go out before me.

Students were bustling here and there to place their paper on the teacher's desk, when only few remain, I made my way to put mine. Ms. Blake was preoccupied, reading a blue covered book, her eyebrows meeting to form a 'v', all the while chewing gum rather silently. I sheepishly place my sheet to the desk, sighing, I say, "Well, this is awkward."

The busy lady looks up to me, as if dumbfounded and asks, "What?"

"Uhm," I stutter to find my next words, "you know, this. Finding out you're my teacher after what happened last summer."

She continues to chew her gum then sets it aside her tongue, "Sorry, I think you've mistaken me for someone else." Before I could even get out the mental questions that came pouring out of my head, Ms. Blake stood up and fixed her things. Before I know it, I was alone in the classroom.

A week has gone by and Ms. Blake and I didn't make contact whatsoever. Her blatant disregard of me the first day of class was enough to shut me up and put me in my place. I was mixed with embarrassment and confusion. I mean, why would she act like she didn't know who I was? She tried hard for our paths not to meet, even going to the extent of not calling me in class, despite of my hand being raised.

"Yes, Lucas." She points way from the back, a boy who didn't even raise his hand. "Can you answer my question?"

"This is ridiculous." I hiss at Jill, "She never calls me, I look like a desperate pet."

Jill's eyebrows furrow as if she finally sees it, "Yeah, what's that all about?"

"I don't know." I lied, trying not to say the truth which was: Well, Jill, Ms. Blake- actually Sara and I know each other. In fact we shared a kiss in the beach. Now she's pretending to act like she doesn't know me and pretends I don't exist. Saying 'I don't know' is easier than explaining all that.

Lucas, the boy she decided to call, was still standing dumfounded repeatedly saying 'uhm'. A few moments later Ms. Blake gives up and answers her own question. The bell rings and all I could think about was getting out of class as soon as possible, Jill stormed behind me.

"There's my redheaded chica!" Toby, Jill's high school sweetheart, he slaps her lightly on the ass and I knew it was an instant make-out session.

"Get a room." I said, trying hard not to puke.

They separated their lips and giggled in chorus. I need to tell you, their actions were so alike if Toby dressed like Jill I wouldn't know who's who.

"Ms. Collins," a voice from behind called.

I turned my head to see Ms. Rivers-the head of the teacher's department-stand behind me. "Yes, Ms. Rivers?"

"It's good to see that you're well," I replied with a you too, "as you know, each year we hold our science fair in the first month of classes." I nod along in agreement, "You currently hold the title of Science Originator. Being the last year's winner of the fair and as a senior who upholds maturity and responsibility, I'm asking you to prepare this year's science fair."

Seems easy enough, I think. "Well, that would be no problem Ms. Rivers."

"Good, good. I knew I can always count on you. A few things before I leave you, we will give you the fund you need for the fair. The volunteer's club and science club would aid you in preparation. You and Ms. Blake would team up to make this fair as successful as possible."

My mind just flipped suddenly, "I'm sorry, did you say Ms. Blake?"

The aging woman nods and squints, "Yes, she's the new Science teacher and new Science club head. I'm sure you know her." Before I could even speak Ms. Rivers jumps as if excited, "Ah, here she is right now."

I slowly turn to see Ms. Blake leaving the classroom, her attention was caught by our conversation, so it seems. "Ms. Rivers, good to see you." She conversed with the older lady as if I wasn't there.

"Very good timing Ms. Blake, you must know Ms. Collins, her invention won last year." I turn to Ms. Blake with a mocking smile, tired of her oblivious attitude towards me. "Both of you are going to work together for this year's fair."

Ms. Blake must've caught my vibe because she returns a smug smile, "Are we? I'm very excited."

"That's the spirit!" Ms. Rivers exclaims, not catching any of the tension between Ms. Blake and I. "You and your team should get ready as soon as possible, the science fair is only two short weeks away!" With that, she leaves with a light pat on our backs.

I made sure Ms. Rivers was out of earshot before I spoke. Ms. Blake turned and walked away and I caught up with her, "What is wrong with you?" I asked her, obviously flustered about her ignorance.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She replies simply without even looking at me.

My head was heating up, "Would stripping down remind you anything? Maybe my underwear would finally bring back your memories, Sara."

She stops and looks at me with her light eyes which I've been captivated by since the time at bar. "Stop." That's all she said then she left me hanging again, engulfed by the crowd in the hallway.