Finally Finding My Luna

Chapter 12

{Zader POV}

I had been asleep for a few hours when I nearly fell out of the queen sized bed because of a blood curdling scream from down the hall. I scrambled to untangle myself from the blankets and ran down the hall to my mate who continued to scream. 

I barged into the bedroom where she lay on the bed wrestling with a pillow fiercely. I flipped on the overhead light and saw that she was still asleep. 

“NO!! Get away from me. I said I don’t want to!!! Get off of me!!” she screamed at her invisible attacker. I could hear her bones start to crack in the act of shifting. Her wolf was trying to come to the surface as a defense mechanism to protect her from the nightmare. 

I rushed over to the side of the bed to try and wake her. If she were to shift into her wolf while she was asleep, then her wolf may not be fully connected to her subconsciously. Her wolf, whose name I wasn’t sure of, might perceive me as the threat and try to take me out. She wouldn’t be connected to Enslee, so she may just go into animal mode and attack me.

“Enslee, wake up! It’s just a dream.” I tried to shake her by the shoulders gently, but that only agitated her wolf even more. She emitted a deep growl, and her wolf fully shifted in that moment. In the blink of an eye, I was staring at a breathtakingly beautiful white wolf. 

The wolf stared at me with the same blue eyes that Enslee had, but hers were icy as they sized me up. I could tell she wasn’t registering that I was her mate. I tried to talk to her to calm her down.

“Easy there. I know we haven’t officially met yet, but my name is Zader. I am your mate. I was just trying to --” I was immediately met with a ferocious growl. Her hackles raised, and she leapt off the bed onto the floor in front of me. 

Amazingly, her shoulders were eye level with me. She was fairly large for a female wolf, even with Alpha blood. I caught myself marveling at the sheer power of Enslee’s wolf as her muscles rippled and retracted as she stalked around me. I held my ground and stared her down, which is considered a challenge in the world of wolves.

I swore to myself I would never use my Alpha status over my mate, but I might not have a choice in this situation. Enslee was completely buried in her own mind. She was not in control at this moment, and her wolf couldn’t communicate with her. I was not able to mindlink her, since we hadn’t completed the mating process yet. 

I knew I would need to get to the emergency button installed in the living room. My dad had a system installed on each high ranking family floor after a rogue attack that nearly killed our Gammas. The rogues slipped through the pack boundaries and snuck into the packhouse. They made it to the Gamma floor and attacked the Gamma family.

Luckily, our Gamma at the time held them off long enough for our Beta and my dad to come to his defense. After that devastation, my dad installed a system on each of the high ranking family floors that consisted of metal barriers for all doors and windows. 

It would keep out wolves, and that means it’ll keep one in too. I knew I had to lock down our floor, or Enslee’s wolf might go on a rampage throughout the rest of the packhouse. 

She continued to circle around and I could tell I didn’t have long before she found my weak spot and charged. I bent my knees to prepare for her, and she took this as a sign of aggression and pounced at me. I used all of my strength and leapt over her just as she chomped her large teeth at my legs. 

I landed on the floor behind her and bolted for the door. I sprinted down the hallway towards the living room, and I heard as she barreled out of the bedroom into the hallway bashing into the opposite wall. I made the last dash to hit the button that was hidden in the side of the fireplace chimney. 

I slammed my fist into the button, and the system started lowering the metal doors in place. Enslee’s wolf came into the living room and was instantly confused as the metal started screeching and shutting around her.

Her deep blue eyes landed on me, and she immediately bared her teeth and charged at me once more. I mentally yelled for Arlo to come forward in that instant, and he gladly obliged. We shifted and he easily dodged her first lunge. 

Okay, Arlo. Remember we have to be careful. She’s our mate, and this is not her fault. She’s not thinking straight. You have to focus on keeping us alive for however long it takes for her to come to her senses.

You got it. Goddess she’s beautiful…

Our thoughts were cut off as our mate bit into Arlo’s shoulder breaking bone. Arlo growled in pain but shook her off. Our front leg was rendered useless by the break, at least until it healed. Damn, that was going to hurt when we shifted back.

Enslee’s wolf jumped onto our back and bit into Arlo’s neck. Luckily the top of a wolf’s neck has pretty thick muscles, and it only drew blood. He howled in pain and whined. It was hurting him physically, but I could feel his emotional despair as well. His mate was hurting him, and it was their first time to meet. 

He was slightly heartbroken, and I couldn’t blame him. Deep down, he knew it wasn’t her wolf’s fault. She was just trying to protect her human. 

Arlo flipped onto his back hard and it was enough to knock the breath out of her and she released. My wolf got back to his feet, and that’s when he had a brilliant idea. He simply submitted. He laid on his side to show his belly and neck and whimpered to show his submission. 

Enslee’s wolf stood and looked over Arlo with confusion. She growled and bared her teeth, but he didn’t move. She was wondering why he didn’t show a threat. I could see that Enslee was starting to fight to shift back to human, so I gently nudged Arlo to let me come forward.

He stepped back, and I took over. I shifted back and got to my feet in the living room. It was excruciating to shift with a broken bone, but I had to be human to get through to Enslee. I could see Enslee and her wolf wrestling for control as the wolf writhed on the ground. Bones were shifting and trying to break back into human form. 

“Enslee, I don’t know if you can hear me. But your wolf doesn’t recognize me as her mate. She’s trying to kill me and Arlo. He won’t hurt her, which means she’ll kill us. Please fight for control, baby. Please get her to understand.”

Her eyes searched wildly about the room, and I grabbed a blanket and wrapped myself in it. I knelt down and stroked her wolf’s face to comfort her. 

“I know you’re confused. You’re just trying to protect your girl, but I promise that’s all I want too. She is the love of my life, and I will protect her till my dying breath. You don’t recognize me because she was in a dream when you shifted to protect her. Please let her have control back.”

Finally, her wolf conceded and let Enslee start to fully shift to her human form. I quickly grabbed a second blanket and draped it across Enslee’s body before she fully shifted. She looked up at me and her cheeks reddened. 

“I am so sorry. I don’t-- I couldn’t-- get Harley to...she was just not listening. I told her to let me have control back…” Tears started welling up in her eyes, and she wrapped the blanket around her body. She started sobbing recklessly and her body was shaking from the effort. 

I wrapped the blanket around my waist and twisted it in place. I knelt down beside her and opened my arms. I didn’t want to startle her or frighten her with my touch, so I waited for her to come to me. She looked up through the tears and inched closer to me. I embraced her and kissed her head. 

She snuggled into my bare chest and I shifted her onto my lap making sure that the blanket was wrapped around her butt and legs. She fit neatly against the curve of my own body and it was easy to hold her. Enslee quieted down and eventually looked up at me. 

Her eyes were red-rimmed and puffy, and I could see the tear stains on her flushed cheeks. I tried to console her the best I could and whispered in her ear.

“It’s okay baby, I know it wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t Harley’s fault either. She was just trying to protect you. She didn’t realize who I was. I love you sweetheart.”

I kissed her forehead and tucked her hair behind her ear. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up.” 

I slowly stood to my feet with her in my arms and carried her back down the hallway. “Baby, you don’t ever have to be sorry about waking me up. I don’t mind at all.”

I walked into the master bedroom and gently laid her on the bed. She looked around the room at the claw marks on the floor and walls. She noticed the decorations that had fallen down and gasped at the damage. 

I gently tilted her chin back to face me. “Shhh, no it’s okay. Don’t worry about this. I will have this cleaned up tomorrow while you’re out shopping. Don’t even give it another thought.”

Her bottom lip pooched out in a pout, but she nodded anyways. I hugged her tight to me and walked over to my closet. I grabbed another t-shirt and handed it to her. I bent down to collect the remains of the one she had shredded in the process of suddenly shifting. 

“I’m sorry I tore--” I held up my hand patiently. 

She closed her mouth and looked down. “Baby, you don’t have to be sorry for that either. Nothing you ever do will require an apology. It wasn’t your fault, none of it.”

“I know I apologize a lot, but I guess it’s second nature now. After living for ten years as a slave in my own pack, I just had to apologize for everything. Even if it wasn’t my fault. It’s just a reaction now.”

I took her hand and laid it between mine. “I know sweetheart. It’ll take time to unlearn those unhealthy habits, but I am here to help you do that. I’m patient, so don’t worry.”

She nodded and squeezed my hand. I laid it back on the bed and slowly walked toward the door. I flicked the light switch back off and started to walk down the hallway when Enslee called out to me.

“Um, Zader...can you come back please?”

I turned on my heel sharply and jogged back to her. “I’m here. What is it?”

She sighed, and I couldn’t tell what kind of sigh it was. It was too dark to see her gorgeous face. “I just don’t -- I can’t sleep I don’t think. And I would really like it if you would -- maybe...sleep in here with me but on the couch and not in the bed please.”

The last part of her statement was rushed and it took me a second to process what she was asking of me. Once I realized just what she was saying, my breath caught in my throat. I cleared it and found words again.

“Uh sure, just let me get a fresh pair of shorts from the closet.”

“Okay, that’ll give me time to change into this t-shirt.”

I walked into the closet and pulled out the drawer where my shorts were stored. I dropped the blanket from my waist and pulled on a new pair of basketball shorts. I didn’t know for sure whether Enslee had gotten to finish changing, so I cracked the door open a hair.

“Can I come out?”

“Yes.”

I walked back out into the room carrying the blanket I’d had around my waist earlier. I grabbed my pillow off of my side of the bed and tossed it on the couch. I started to lay down, but a small voice stopped me. 

“Um, it’s pretty dark in here. Could we possibly turn on a light of some sort? It’s just that if I have a nightmare, and wake up to total darkness, it will be hard to know if I’m really awake. I don’t want Harley to shift again not knowing who you are. I’m sorry, I hope the light won’t bother you…”

She trailed off, and I stood back up from the other side of the couch. “No, it won’t bother me in the slightest. I would be more than happy to turn on a light. Would the fireplace be alright?”

There was a long moment of silence, and she giggled. “Sorry, I forgot you couldn’t see me. Yes, that will be alright.”

I smiled and laughed myself. I carefully made my way to the fireplace in the dark. I turned it on and put the heat setting on low. The room was bathed in a warm glow, and I could see Enslee’s face from the bed. She had her eyes closed and was wiggling deeper under the covers.

“That’s more like it.” She was settling in, and I was so happy to see her becoming comfortable. I laid down on the couch and faced the fire. I couldn’t see Enslee anymore because of the back of the couch. 

“Goodnight Z.”

I smiled at the new nickname she’d given me. 

“Goodnight E.”

She giggled and I heard her shift in the bed. I closed my eyes against the warmth of the fire and let myself drift off once more.