Finally Finding My Luna

Chapter 5

Warning: This chapter contains very violent and graphic scenes that might be disturbing. Please read with caution.

{Enslee POV}

It was finally the day of the Christmas Ball. Harley was really excited today, and she wouldn’t tell me why. I mentally promised to let her go out for a run tonight after the high ranking members went to sleep. 

I was forbidden to shift into my wolf form, since they didn’t want me to have any type of power. I could usually sneak in a run maybe once or twice a week. 

Luckily, the Alpha assigned me to kitchen duty for most of the day, since we were hosting the dinner that was to precede the actual ball. I was able to spend most of the day with Audrey. 

“Good morning Enslee! I am so happy you are on kitchen duty today. Get over here and start prepping the roast beef.” Audrey called out to me from the sinks. The packhouse kitchens are large with industrial sized appliances for the huge quantities of food we had to produce for pack members. 

I walked over to the fridge and grabbed the beef to let it start thawing on the counter. I joined Audrey at the sink to help wash dishes from breakfast. 

“So how is everything going today?” Audrey asked me. 

“Well it’s better than it has been in a while. My cuts and bruises have healed from the beating I got two days ago, and I got to have two meals in a row yesterday. I am excited to have so many people at the ball tonight. It will lessen the chance that I get beaten if there are so many witnesses.” 

Audrey c****d her head to the side considering my statements and nodded with solemness. “Well that is a sad way to look at it, but I guess you’re right.”

“Also, Harley is very excited today for whatever reason. She won’t tell me why, but her happiness is rubbing off on me.”

Audrey nodded, and we got back to washing the dishes in companionable silence. Over the next few hours, we cooked a majority of the food and set them over burners to keep them warm for the feast. Dinner was to be served at 6:00 pm, and we had just a few hours left to get everything in place. 

After the table was set and the last of the food was prepared, everyone went their separate ways to get ready for the evening. I went to my tiny room at the farthest corner of the packhouse to try and freshen up as much as possible. My room was an old supply closet that the Alpha forced me to use when he first took me as a pack slave. 

It was barely large enough for the old ratty twin sized mattress that I slept on. It had holes in it and was dirty from years of wear and tear. I had picked it up outside of one of the pack member’s cottages after they threw it out. It was better than sleeping on old blankets and towels on the floor. 

I opened the door and edged past the makeshift bed to the other end of the room. I grabbed the one towel that I had been given ten years ago to use for bathing and whatever else I might need a towel for. It had a few holes in it, but I had tried to take really good care of it. 

I grabbed an old tshirt and a pair of shorts to take with me to shower as well as the travel sized bottle of shampoo. I was only given one tiny bottle of shampoo each month. Our packhouse had an outdoor pool in the backyard with one of those outdoor showers that people use after they get done swimming. That was the only place I was allowed to shower. 

I made it outside, and it was freezing cold. I looked at the thermometer on the wall beside the back door, and it read 13 degrees Fahrenheit. I would have to hurry this shower or the water would freeze to my skin again. 

The outside showers didn’t have hot water, since they were only meant to be used during the summertime. I hurried up and slung my towel and clothes over the fence that surrounded the shower. I turned on the water and quickly showered. 

I was so cold, and I was losing feeling in my toes. I got dressed in shorts and tshirt and wrapped my hair up in the towel. I ran back inside to the warmth and went back to my room. I curled up on the bed and used my blanket to try and warm up a little bit. 

After about thirty minutes, I started to get dressed. It was a ball, but I didn’t have a fancy dress or anything. The only dress I had was the black dress that I was given by my mother before she died. I was allowed to keep it only for occasions like this. It was the dress my mother wore to her Luna ceremony.

It was a spaghetti strap and came just above my knee. I slipped it over my head and smiled slightly. I am 21, the same age my mother was when she became Luna. I let one single tear slip from my eyes, and I fiercely scrubbed it away. I hated crying, especially in front of people. It was a sign of weakness, and I wanted to be strong. 

I brushed the tangles out of my hair and put on the small bit of foundation and mascara that I had. Audrey gave me her extra makeup when she could, but I had to be careful about using it. If the Alpha or Luna caught me using it, then I could be severely punished. I knew they wouldn’t notice with all of the visiting high ranking wolves. 

I made my way back down to the kitchen to get the final preparations made. There were several Alphas already in the great room enjoying the cocktails and chatting amongst themselves. Of course, no one noticed me as I slipped through the room. I could smell all of the arousal from the unmated Alphas, Betas and Gammas as our female pack members mingled and served the drinks. I knew that several of our pack members would be getting laid tonight. 

I yanked the door to the kitchen open and began grabbing the dishes to put them in the buffet line. Audrey was on the other end of the buffet line pouring mashed potatoes in a container. 

“Hey Ens! Grab the other batch of mashed potatoes and bring them down here next to these.”

She always called me Ens. It was my favorite nickname, but only my mom and dad had ever called me that. I remember when Audrey first called me that, and it made me smile for the first time since my parents were killed. 

I walked into the kitchen and grabbed the extra pot of mashed potatoes. I joined Audrey at the buffet table and poured it into the larger container on the table. We finished getting everything finalized and took our places as it was time for the guests to take their seats for the meal. 

I stood in line to serve the food, while the Alphas, Betas, and Gammas started to file in. Alpha Slade and Luna Melani took their places at the front of the room. 

“Good evening Alphas, Betas, Gammas and other guests. The Red Moon pack is happy to welcome you to our territory. It is an honor to be the host of this year’s Christmas Ball. Please enjoy your time here and enjoy the meal!”

Everyone in the room started clapping, but I just rolled my eyes. Always pretending to be a great leader and loving everyone. I hated him with every bone in my body. 

The wolves started lining up by table to go through the buffet line, and my wolf stirred.

Now is our opportunity to find our mate. I know he’ll be here. Every male is about to pass right by us. If one of them is our mate, we will know immediately.

I know, I know. Now hush so I don’t spill food on an Alpha and get my head ripped off. 

She retreated to the back of my mind, and I started to serve wolves. There were roughly 500 wolves invited to this ball, and I stood there for two hours serving food. After the last wolf went through the line, I still hadn’t found my mate. My heart immediately dropped. 

I know he’s here somewhere. Maybe he had someone else get his plate, or maybe he isn’t hungry. 

Leave me alone Harley. You got my hopes up, but I knew we wouldn’t be given a mate. The moon goddess has turned her back on us. She let our parents get murdered, and she wouldn’t give us a mate to protect us. We have to protect ourselves from pain and from heartbreak. We have to live life on our own.

I know he’s here, you just have to have faith. Trust me-- 

I shoved her to the back of mind and put up a wall. I was angry and hurt, and I didn’t want to talk to her. I knew it wasn’t completely her fault, but I just couldn’t take any more hope. I didn’t want to hope, I wanted to move on with my life. 

I stood in the corner of the room and served the head table as usual. I glanced up as the Luna lifted her finger motioning for me to come up. I made my way to the table and prayed that nothing too embarrassing would happen in front of hundreds of people. 

“Holy shit...is that the same piece of crap dress that you always wear? Don’t you have anything else? You’re so ugly.” Alisha sneered at me as I made my way to her mother.

I just clenched my teeth in anger and just kept silent. I approached Melani and tried to keep my annoyance hidden.

“Luna, how may I serve you?” It was so humiliating to have to ask that, but I was taught that at a young age. Every time I don’t address the Alpha, Luna or Alisha that way, I get a beating. 

“Get me more water bitch.” She practically shoved her glass toward me, and I had to catch it using my werewolf speed. 

“Yes Luna.” 

I ran to the drink table and refilled her glass with water and ice. I brought it back to her and set it by her plate. Of course, she was hateful about it and decided to throw the water on me after tasting it. 

“You b***h! This tastes like s**t. YOU ARE USELESS!! GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!” 

I bowed my head and quickly ran to the back of the room and out of the doors. All of the wolves were snickering and laughing at me. This was my worst nightmare. I finally got out of the room and got to the hallway. My hair was soaked, and my dress was dripping. I was positive that my mascara was running, and I was completely embarrassed. 

I ran to my room and cried my eyes out until I couldn’t breath. My mom always taught me that it’s okay to cry, but you never let your enemies see you cry. I pulled myself together and went back to the dining hall. By now, the tables had been cleared away. It had been transformed for the actual ball. Several people were already dancing and drinking. In fact, there were several drunk wolves already. 

I stayed on the edge of the room trying to stay out of the way and unnoticed. I saw Audrey across the room trying to persuade an eager young Gamma that she truly didn’t want to dance. I rolled my eyes and made my way over to her. 

“Audrey, is this guy bothering you?” I said biting back a growl. 

She eyed me with a warning. My temper usually gets the best of me when I see a male being aggressive towards a female. Audrey knew I would get angry fast. 

“No Enslee, it’s fine. He was just leaving.” she said through gritted teeth more towards the drunk Gamma than to me. 

“No, I wasn’t leaving. I was trying to ask your friend here if she’d like to dance, but she’s too much of a b***h to say yes. She thinks she is  too good for me! Well, I have got news for you...I am a GAMMA. I am a high ranking wolf, and she would be LUCKY to dance with me.”

I punched him in the nose. I was so pissed off by his rage and how he thought he was better than us. As my fist connected with his nose, I could hear the bone breaking. Blood started pouring from his nose as he screamed in pain. 

Luckily, we didn’t attract too much attention. The music was too loud for many people to notice, although I was sure the Alpha would find out by the end of the night. The Gamma started healing about thirty seconds later, and the bleeding stopped. He growled at me and stalked away. 

Audrey looked at me in bewilderment. “Are you crazy??? Do you know what they are going to do to you when they find out that you broke a Gamma’s nose??? You cannot protect me like this.”

I closed my eyes tight and growled. “I know, I know. They will probably torture me for it. I can’t help it. You know that being of alpha blood makes me protective. You cannot expect me to sit by and watch someone harass you.”

Audrey grabbed my hand and patted it. “I know. I am sorry, but I don’t want to see you end up dead one of these days from a beating.”

She and I talked some more to calm both of us down, and she eventually had to make her way back to the kitchen to fix horderves and other finger foods. 

I lingered in the corner of the room where the beatings usually took place. I was sure that I would get dragged there soon anyway, so I just decided to accept it. The music was very loud, and I just decided to slip into the room for a quieter place. 

I paced back and forth trying to think about how different my situation would be right now if I had found my mate like Harley had hoped for. I wouldn’t be walking around in a room waiting for a beating. I would possibly be getting to know him or being held out on the dance floor while he spins me around and around. 

I used to fantasize about having a mate and finding true love just like any other little girl. I would wake up one day as the princess in my castle with the knight in shining armour would come riding on his white horse and swoop me off my feet. How horribly wrong I was. 

I leaned against the wall and looked around the room that I was too familiar with. It was the old conference room that my dad used as the Alpha. Slade didn’t use it for meetings anymore, since he didn’t have a beta or gamma. He didn’t need a meeting room to run his pack like a dictator. 

It had a huge oak table that had been pushed against the far wall, and several chairs were scattered around the room. I have had those chairs thrown at me, and I have had my head bashed into that table. My blood was literally in the walls, floor and furniture of this room. I hated this room.

I walked to the table and let my fingers trace the wood grain and leaned against it for support. The door burst open, and I just knew it was the Alpha coming to beat me senseless. I started shaking involuntarily, but I stopped when I realized it was only the Gamma that I had punched earlier. 

“I thought I saw you walk in here. You are going to regret breaking my nose you little bitch.” he snarled at me. 

“Oh yeah, that’s right. You’re the little p****y that couldn’t take a hit from a girl.” I retorted.

He growled loudly and stalked in my direction. In four strides he was inches from my face and seething with anger. “YOU b***h. I’LL SHOW YOU WHO THE P***Y IS.”

He slapped my face and ripped my dress down the front. My body was exposed, and he laughed at me with evil in his voice. “Ahhhh such a nice body for such a stupid b***h. Let’s see if you’re a nice f**k too.” 

He ripped my underwear and bra off and smiled at his accomplishment. I gagged and pushed him off of me. He punched my face, and I fell to the ground with the force. He started to unzip his pants, while I scrambled for the door. 

He grabbed my ankles and drug me backwards to the center of the room. He was fondling my body with his hands and flipped me over onto my back. 

“Get off of me you filthy animal! Don’t touch me!” I screamed trying to grab his arms to throw him off of me. He punched me in the face over and over in anger. I could feel the blood dripping down my face and into my hair. I was out of it, and I couldn’t see from my eyes swelling shut. 

I could hear him laughing as I lay lifeless underneath him. I wasn’t sure if tears were actually falling, but I started to cry. I moaned in pain as he grabbed my body with force and spread my legs. I clenched my jaw the best I could and tried not to show fear. Just as the Gamma got ready to fully violate me, the door swung open again. 

A sweet scent filled my nose, and I could hear Harley howling in the back of my head. 

Mate!!! Our mate is here.

I didn’t have time to respond before a growl shook the room. 

“GET THE F**K AWAY FROM MY MATE!!!” a man yelled. I heard two short footsteps and suddenly the Gamma’s body was ripped away from mine. 

“Rylan, cover her up while I kill this wolf. Get her out of here.” I felt a blanket or towel of some sort cover my body, and a strong pair of arms lifted me gently from the floor.

The man carrying me spoke soothingly to me. “It’s alright Luna. You’re safe now. You’re going to be okay.” For whatever reason I trusted him, and I let go. I relaxed and let my body slip into unconsciousness.