Jessica used to joke carelessly about death when she was younger.
That’s one thing trauma changed permanently.
Because once you’ve actually felt your body shutting down, death stops sounding dramatic or distant.
It becomes physical.
Terrifyingly physical.
And honestly?
It hurts.
The overdoses blurred together in certain ways over the years.
Different nights.
Different substances.
Different versions of Jessica slowly destroying herself while pretending she still had control.
But some moments never left her memory completely.
Especially the moments where her body stopped cooperating entirely.
The moments where survival itself became uncertain.
Jessica remembers how strange overdoses felt physically.
At first there’s often chaos.
The racing heart.
The panic.
The chemicals fl
