Constant trouble

It will be your triumph

Eva's POV

"So, today is the last rehearsal before the Day D?" asked Mira making last big gulp of a tea from her mug. It's red with white dots. Mine is blue with white dots. We used to drink from them, when we were little. Mila saved them and we've found them in a kitchen cupboard, when we were there to pack a few things for her hospice room. We always make a tea and drink it from these particular mugs, when we are here to visit her. We even make a tea for Mila too, even though, she gets her nutrition and liquids through the IV. We sit and chat casually as she could hear us. That's what the hospice stuff see and think it's cute. In fact, we know, she can hear us. Sometimes I can even mindlink her and have a "chat". Still don't know, why it's not possible all the time. Maybe her spirit is already too far away.

"Yes, I am excited like a little kid before Christmas, Mira. How did Helen made her visions into reality. As I know her work, it will be spectacular, I am sure. But little part of me is scared, if it will fit with the choreography." I replied standing up from the armchair near Mila's bed and chewed my lips.

"You still have time to change it slightly until Saturday night." she said with a grin, knowing it's almost impossible.

"Yeah, sure, as if Yuri's comments towards me and my incompetence weren't enough." I said when walking out of the room into the kitchen in the hall. I took also Mira's mug a went to wash them there.

Yuri is also a choreographer on this show. Unlike me, he has a lot of experience in creating a choreography for such a big show. He made it very clear from the very beginning of our cooperation, that he doesn't think I am capable of such a big thing and that I am here just because of my old friendship with the boss. I would be lying, if I said, that it didn't occure me many times. Am I really that good to do such thing? I am just a local pole dance trainer, what can I offer to such ambitious project? And when I let myself go deeper in that kind of thoughts, I always ended up remembering old wounds. The very well known voices of my ex-boyfriends... Vladimir's: "You are nothing. Priceless piece of s**t." or Daniel's: "You don't deserve any better, you freak." More than 2 years ago from Daniel, and 3,5 from Vladimir, and I can still sometimes hear them in my head. Yuri has the same ability like these two greatest mistakes in my life. Making me feel like I really am not good for anything and I don't deserve to be, where I am.

But I somehow made it through his toxic behaviour, tried even harder to show him (and myself), that I can do it. And I also didn't want to let down my good old friend Bruno. The new owner of this club and one of the few friends I had in orphanage.

I went back to the room, Mira was packing the rest of the cake into the cardboard.

"I'm gonna leave it in the fridge in the hall and tell the stuff they can finish it, what do you think?" asked Mira.

"Sure you don't want to take some for Oscar?"

"He is so buried in the research for the book, that he hardly eats. And when he do, I need to stuff him with something nutritious, not just sugar." she smiled, but with a little worry. I nodded and went closer to Mila's bed. I want to try to connect with her, all my today's attempts failed. I sat beside her on the bed, put my forehead on hers, closed my eyes and let my wolf Nila chant her song. After a few notes I've finally heard a murmur from far away, it got closer and there she is!

"Oh, Eva, moje holčičko (my little girl)!" she said with a raspy voice.

"Hi, Mila, happy birthday!" I said with a inner smile.

"It's already another year? Oh my, how old am I? 100?" she asked like she is angry.

"Not yet, Mila, only 80, your whole life is ahead...waiting!" I told her with a slight irony in my voice. She knows me and my humour, so she laughed wholeheartedly.

"I taught you well. You and Mira. Is she here, too?" she asked

"Yes, of course, how could she not be? We've bought you flowers and cake. We ate the cake and we are gonna let the flowers in the vase in case you'd want to smell them." I said.

"You bring no booze? I take it back, I didn't teach you well at all." I laughed, this time not only in my head, but loud. Suddenly there are tears in my eyes.

"Mé dítě (My child), what is it. You can't hide it from me." she asked suspiciously.

"Remember the cabaret show I am working on?" I asked.

"Yes, of course, you had doubts about yourself again and I told you, you're gonna nail it!" she said. I smiled a little.

"Well, the rehearsals are almost over and there will be a premiere in 3 days. I am nervous, but that's normal. I was just feeling sad about you not seeing it. I'd love to have you there."

"What are you talking about? Of course I'll be there, not precisely in physical form, but you know me, I'll find my way. You think I'd miss my brave shewolf's triumph?" she said with reassuring tone in her voice.

"Than everything is alright and I can just continue getting nervous about other things, that could fail." I said with a smile trying to hide my teary eyes.

"It will be ok, my dear. I have to go now. Tell Mira I love her. And that I'd love her to read me one day from their book, they are writing with Oscar. Oh and Oscar of course. Give them both a hug and a massive kiss from me, ok?" she said while leaving our connection slowly.

"I will, Mila. Take care of yourself until next visit on Sunday, ok? I will tell you how it went at the premiere."

"Can't wait to hear every single detail."

"Bye, mom." I said and slowly opened my eyes and move my forehead a little away from hers. I looked at her calm face and sigh. Than I heard quiet noises behind me, it was Mira.

"You were lucky this time? What did she say, you were laughing out loud at one moment." she asked.

"She was disappointed, that we didn't bring any booze." I said and Mira burst into laugh.

"Yeah, that sure was her talking. Anything else?" she asked and I saw tears in her eyes. I stood up from the bed and went closer to her.

"She told me she's looking forward to read one day from your book and..." Mira is already crying like a baby. "...and that I should give you and Oscar a big hug and that she loves you very, very much." I told her, crying also and holding her in tight embrace.

"I just miss her so much."

"I know, me too."