Enigmatic Dream

Enigma 17

Forever

Iniwan muna kami ng lahat ni Jalaneel. Hindi parin siya nagsasalita, blangko ang kaniyang mukha. Pinunasan ko ang mga luhang tumutulo sa kaniyang mata.

He suddenly grabbed my wrist. "Azurine, kasalan ko to. Kung sana lang ay binantayan kita nang mas maigi. Hindi sana tayo umabot sa ganito." Jalaneel said.

"It's my fault, kung nakinig lang sana ako sa iyo, hindi na mangyayari ito. I am thankful still, definitely I am. Who wouldn't? Hindi lahat nakapagpapa-alam pa sa kanilang mahal sa buhay. Ang iba hindi na nagigising, ang iba naman namamatay sa isang aksidente. Look at me, I am spending last two days with my loved ones." I smiled at him.

"Thank you for taking care of me, for always bringing my bag." natatawang sabi ko sa kaniya,ngunit hindi siya tumawa o ngumisi man lang.

"Thank you for making me feel that I am loved. I will miss your corny lines. I wish I can forever recieve you forehead kisses, but I know that wish is always different from hope. Hopes can come true, but wish can't." patuloy siya sa pakikinig sa akin.

"Sana kapag nagkita tayo ulit matalo na kita sa mga riddles, ang daya mo naman, ang talino mo." natatawang wika ko sa kaniya.

"You always win when it comes to me." he sincerely said, mas lalong lumakas pa ang pag-iyak ko.

"I'm just a little bit sad, because I won't be able to enter the Nabhas again. I won't be able to join Bluesette eating dinner in Neeblaja. I can't see Bluestell and Azraq again, but in a short period of time; time allow us to make happy memories in those places. I will forever cheerish those memories, because they're priceless." hinayaan niya lang ako sa mga nais kong sabihin sa kaniya.

"Don't forget to take of yourself. Sorry for being a hard-headed girl." I said and I hugged him. He didn't hugged me back.

"Before you came in to my life, I ask my self kung kailan kaya ako magiging masaya ulit? Now, I will be asking myself the same question again. Hindi ko alam anong kasalanan ba ang nagawa ko. Bakit hindi ako hinahayaan ng panahon na maging masaya? Nagtiis naman ako noon, hindi ko maapuhap ang wastong pagkakataon. Kailan ba aayon sa akin ang panahon?" he asked, I didn't answer him, I just wiped his tears.

"I guess the letter H in my name stands for—happiness, the problem is there's no letter H in my name. If I could re-write my name I want it to be it Jhalaneel, because Jalaneel is tired of being sad. It's exhausting being left behind. " walang tigil ang kaniyang pag-iyak.

"Nakakapagod mag hintay, nakakapagod maiwan; nakakapagod magmahal. Pagod na pagod na ako, Azurine." he said.

"Natatakot na akong maging masaya, dahil isang daan saya sa ngayon; isang daang milyon na lungkot bukas. " nakatingin lang siya sa kalangitan. Hindi parin tumitigil ang luha niya sa pagpatak.

"It's ironic that our story haven't yet started, but we're already at last page of it. I will not say that I am slowly losing you, because I cannot lose someone I never had." hindi ko alam kung ano pa ang sasabihin ko sa kaniya. Naubos na ang lakas ko.

"There's nothing in this lifetime I desire besides being geniuely happy. They said that when you're brave enough to say goodbye, life will give a better hi. Bakit ako binigyan nga ng panibagong kasiyahan, ang bilis naman ng kaakibat na kalungkutan?" he asked.

"Dahil baka hindi ako ang babaeng makapagpapasaya sa'yo ng tunay. I believe that you deserve all the happiness, Jalaneel." I answered him. Hindi parin tumitigil sa kai-iyak.

"I couldn't agree less when you say that you're not the one who can make me happy. If you think that I truly deserve happiness, I think I deserved you. When I'm with you, I'm the happiest." sabi niya sa akin.

"Jalaneel, in another dream; please be my man." I said, he kissed my forehead.

"I will forever choose you, Azurine. Hindi mo man ako minahal ngayon, pangako kong mamahalin kita hanggang sa kabilang buhay." hinawakan niya ang magka-bilang pisngi ko.

" I regret that I didn't show and tell you what I feel everytime I'm with you. Kung alam ko lang hindi sana akong nagdalawang isip na sabihin sa'yo. My heart melted everytime you carry my bag, every single move you make. I am grateful for all those efforts. Thank you for taking me to your place—in Azraq. Please, take care of my mom. Nakakahiya mang hingin sa iyo yon, but please take of my mom. My journey here in Chandraneel is the best thing happened in my life." I hugged him tight.

"I will, Azurine." he said.

" Please be happy even without me; always remember that I want you to be happy. If you're happy, I'm also happy." I reminded him. Nararamdaman ko na basang-basa na ang aking damit sa kaniyang mga luha.

"Asking me to be happy without you, is like asking a fire to transform into water. Azurine, it's so damn impossible." Jalaneel said, hinaplos niya ang aking buhok.

"Under the blue skies, beside the blue tree, behind the blue kingdom. This is the the first time I will say this to you. I Love You, I Blue you." hinarap niya ako at halos hindi na ako maka hinga dahil sobrang pag-iyak ko simula pa kanina.

"Azurine, this is my first time hearing those words from you. Ang sarap pakinggan. It's so hard for me to remember this day, because the day you said your 'I love you', is also the day we will bid our farewell for each other. " he said, gustong-gusto kong kunin ang lungkot na maba-bakas sa kaniyang mga mata.

"Azurine, always remember that this is not the last chapter of our story. " he said to me.

"Jalaneel, this might be the last chapter of it, because not every love story ends happily. " wika ko sa kaniya, ngunit hindi niya ako sinagot.

"Ang bawat istorya ay may may manunulat, hahanapin ang saan mang lupalop ito; mapalitan lang ang katapusan nito." nakatitig lang ako sa mga mata niyang punong-puno ng lungkot.

"Paano kapag hindi pumayag?" natatawang tanong ko sa kaniya.

"I will re-write our own story, Azurine. Stop doubting what can I do for you. I can do everything, I mean literally—everything." he confidently said. Sana nga Jalaneel, sana nga.

"A-asa na ba ako,Jalaneel?" pagbibiro ko sa kaniya, masyado na kaming madaming naiyak. Gusto kong daanin nalang ang lahat sa saya. Gusto kong maging masaya bago lisanin ang mundong ito.

"Azurine, look at me." he commanded. I didn't look at him, he lifted my chin up.

"If we can't see each other, never forget that once upon a time; my heart and whole being will be forever yours." he said before his lips touched mine.