Feral things

VIEWS

"Hey Dee." Axel smiles at me, ruffling my dark hair, and I shove him away playfully.

"Where's Asher?" I ask, not beating around the bush. Asher is Axel's eldest brother, and rumour has it he will be the new Beta of The Moon Shadow Pack, he is also the love of my life.

At age twenty, that might seem juvenile, but I know deep in my heart, that I was made for him, I am just waiting for him to come to the inevitable realization too.

"Had some meetings with the Alpha, Pack politics." He shrugs, and I hug him.

Axel has been my bestfriend for a very long time, and it was by been his bestfriend that I found Asher.

"Axel." A booming voice invades our space, and naturally, all parts of me are on alert.

"Asher," He looks at his brother, and I can see them communicating through glances and body language. I hate been treated like a baby, but that is how everyone sees me, including Asher.

I mean, I am eighteen, and he is just four years older, but I am a baby still.

"Darlyn?"

It is the way his tongue wraps around my name, like it was made to called by him, I wonder if the way he calls my name will change if he's gripping my hair, and t -

"Dee?"

My eyes widen, and I blush furiously, then try to recover elegantly "Yeah?"

"Are you okay, you look a bit red." Ash frowns, and I say nothing, letting the redness fade.

He stares me for some time, there's a way he stares at me, like he can not believe I am here, in his presence, real, or, I am just something he can not believe.

"I am fine, are you going my way?" I say, shrugging like I am not affected by him.

"Yes." He nods, and I smile, taking a step towards him, his blue eyes trail my movement.

"We should walk together." I say, filling the silence, I can feel Axel roll his eyes.

"No, I need to do something." He says, and walks away, faster than necessary . I bite my lips, hoping to mask the sting in my chest, he obviously ran from me, and this is not the first time.

I do know that it seems pathetic, to pin over a man who doesn't want me, I have been doing it for five years, and deep down, I hope he can rejects me, perhaps then, I will find my dignity.

"Come on Dee, your birthday is in a few weeks," Axel links our hands, and we walk in the opposite direction.

"Big twenty." He says, and I grin.

"I can't wait to wolf out, and ofcourse, find my mate." I smile, at least then, this crush will fade.

"It is one of the best feelings in the world." He muses, and I nod, as we walk to the Coffee shop. Abruptly, I stop, feeling eyes on me, but when I look back, there's no one there.

_____

"Mom," I say,when I enter my room, and see her sitting on the bed.

"Scar." She smiles at me, and I frown, because there's an undertone of something I do not recognize.

"Is everything okay?" I say, sitting beside her, but she nods.

"Everything is fine, I just need to ask you something." She says, and I shrug.

"You got accepted into Brown, and you said nothing. Why are you not going?"

I freeze, because I do not know how she knew, this is not a topic I want to discuss, it is a decision I have made.

"I am not going, not leaving." I get up, taking few steps away from her.

"Why?" She looks at me, with her green eyes, and blonde hair packed in a bun.

"Nothing," I wave my hands in the air.

"It just doesn't feel right, to leave San Francisco, the Pack. I feel like I am still figuring out who I am, and leaving right in the middle of my metamorphosis will disrupt everything, Mom."

She laughs "You are one of the few people I know who have perfected the act of lying to themselves. Can you at least have courage to tell me you don't want to go to Providence because of Asher Kane."

It's the venom in the way she spits out his name.

"Mom, Ash is not an -- "

"Ash?" She laughs, and it is cruel.

"Getting familiar with the delusions you concoted in your head, are you?"

I stay silent, heart thundering, eyes stinging.

"Asher Kane is the Beta of this Pack, he is twenty-four years old, and has gone to college. He has lived fully, done everything he should do, yet you want to put your life on hold for a man who wouldn't even stay in the same room with you."

"My darling, wake up. You are going to Brown University, to Rhode Island, and I am going to make sure of it, even if it's the last thing I do."

"I will be twenty years old in a few weeks, Mom, and that solidifies the fact that I am a grown woman, and have made my decision. I am not leaving The Moon Shadow Pack because there's work to done, I will wolf out soon, and will need all the help I can get."

"I am not going to Brown because I also need my Family, need my bestfriend Axel, and yes, Mom, because of Asher Kane. Is that so bad, to make life decisions based on other people, to be considerate."

"Darlyn Scarlette Ravenwood," She practically screams.

"A man, you want to give everything up for a MAN! Have I taught you nothing, you are my first child, first daughter, and you are breaking my heart by being so stupid."

I flinch, but she is not done.

"Asher Kane is an accomplished man, and you are just growing. This love, this insane, irrational love, it will be the death of you, and I will not stand aside and watch you burn."

She walks out, and I fall on the ned, exhausted, wondering what happens now.