Destiny and Fate

Kor

Destiny and fate are almost identical. It's hard to distinguish both. But people always say and believe that destiny and fate are the key to meeting people you need to meet.

I also believe in that too. That’s why, in this lifetime, I’ve made sure I’m the first one to seek after her.

It was not easy to find her. I don’t know how to explain the reason why I’m looking for her once we meet. I wasn’t even sure on how I started looking for her. But like I always believed, destiny and fate brought her to me on that one rainy day.

July 3

I was caught by office meetings after meetings. It was stressful and I wasn’t even fully rested that day. She was in my dreams. Crying for my name. My heart ached all night wanting to help her and wipe her eyes from tears. But as always, when my hand reached out for her, she disappeared and left me feeling miserable and wide awake.

Mo-re came into my sight with papers in his hands. “Kor, we should strategize on how to compete with the market this coming rainy season.The board decided to start our second quarter with a rain festival theme. It will capture the younger market and will give us a projection on how to go on until the end of the year”. He continued to look at the papers in his hands and pulled out the remote for my office’s monitor to show the data.

“I’ve read the reports and if we are to target a younger market, the online presence should be stronger than last time. We failed to get the target last time since we focused solely on three main events last season. Hand the proposals to me by this week and I’ll review them before the next presentation”. I reached for my drawer and wrote the details.

“You always write things. What year is it now that you still use sticky notes?” Mo-re pulled the pen out of my hand and waved it on my face.

“Things are better when written.” I smiled and pulled another pen out of the drawer.

“That’s why they call you an old soul”. He made a face and flashed a smile. His eyes changed after staring at me.

“She didn’t let you sleep at all this time, huh?” Mo-re put the papers in his hands onto my table and sat on the chair in front of it. “Do you really believe you’ll meet her in this lifetime? It’s been 20 years. She might’ve decided to stay in the afterlife.” His voice was thick with concern. A part of me wanted to agree with him. Maybe she was tired of how the world works and decided to stay there to rest for eternity.

“I know her. We promised each other we'd meet here. I might have disappointed her in the past, but in this lifetime I’ll be the one who’ll recognize her first. Can’t you give me more support in this lifetime too?” 

“Seeing you like this makes me guilty and sad for you. We’ve been living in the shadow of our past. You’ve been dreaming about her since we were kids. I’m just afraid that this time we should let her go and go back to the afterlife.” I was out of words when fatigue took over me as I leaned back on my chair. I closed my eyes and held my hand over it.

“Fine, fine. I won’t bring her up again. Just try to rest or at least take a walk outside the office. You look pale without sunshine.” Mo-re’s footsteps receded and I was left alone after the door closed.

It rained all day. My car was left at home and my driver was stuck in traffic. I told Mo-re that I'd just walk my way home rather than ride in his car. Who knows how many women he’ll pick up on our way.

Walking on the streets while it's raining is part of the simplicity here on earth. I enjoyed observing the festivities and changes of the four seasons. It reminds me of how she enjoyed all of it back then.

The sound of the countdown on the stoplight rang in my ears. I looked around and found myself lost on my way home. I tried to look for my phone to search on how to get home. People started rushing out from where I was standing while the stoplight urgently rang thrice. 

My phone slipped from my hand and fell onto the sidewalk after a boy hit my legs. I looked down and  a boy with a large parasol hat  was fixing his bag. I was reaching for my phone when the kid looked up at me and got back at my phone.

“I’m sorry, Sir. My bag broke. I didn’t mean to break your phone”. His hands picked up my phone and wiped it onto his clothes. He handed it to me but droplets of water just kept on coming out of it.

His eyes rounded and his cheeks reddened at the sight. “It’s okay. You don’t need to worry about it.” I tried to take my phone from his hands but he wouldn't let go.

“My mom said it’s important for a man to keep his honor. I want to fix your phone. Can I please fix it for you?” The boy held my phone with two hands while his cheeks were still red. 

I followed the kid as he pulled my right sleeve as he marched into a cafe. After we entered the cafe, he pushed me onto one of the chairs near the counter and said that he wouldn’t forgive me if I left.

The child was persistent. I can’t help but be fond of his attitude. 

The sound of the rain filled the cafe and I could see people rushing on their way outside the shop. 

“Kor” My ears didn’t fail to recognize her voice. She came to my sight with the same apologetic smile she had when we first met. I finally found her. 

“Xua” I was out of breath when I called her name, and I couldn't help but smile. After searching for her, I finally met her on that rainy day. The child must have been sent by destiny and fate. He led me to her.

She walked towards me and I just stood there thinking of all the stories I would tell her. “I’m sorry. Kor–”

“Mom, here’s the hair blower. We can fix Sir’s phone now” the kid beamed at Xua. “Yes, Kor. We will fix Sir’s phone” she patted his hair and smiled back.

Is this a trick? A playwright might have been messed up. “I would like to apologize for what happened to your phone. Kor explained it to me.” She got the phone from the boy’s hand and held it instead. “I’ll go back and dry this for now. We’ll check if there’s anything broken after it dries. Kor, stay with him until I come back, okay?”

Xua walked away and left me speechless. The kid pushed me lightly back on the chair and sat in front of me. 

“I’m really sorry for the phone, Sir.” he tugged at my sleeve and I just stared at his hand. “I’m Kor. I’m five. What’s your name, Sir?” The kid stared back at me, waiting for an answer.

“Kor”, I retrieved my hand from his grasp and held my forehead. Was I late, Xua?. I found Xua later than I should have.

“That’s my name! You’re  named Kor too!” the boy shouted and slammed his hands on my knees.

I heard footsteps rushing towards me. “Kor” her voice echoed in my head. I felt her hands reach for me.”Kor”. I called for her before my body gave away.

_______

It is said that an immortal or a god can repent for his mistakes if he survives and lives a peaceful life through ten tribulations. After ten tribulations, an immortal or a god can return to the afterlife and continue his life as it was.

_______

Xua was crying and calling for my name while trapped at the altar. Her red robe glowed orange as the fire got bigger and bigger while I kept calling for her name. 

“Kor”. I felt cold hands on my cheeks. My eyes were tired but I wanted to open them. It’s Xua. She’s calling me but my body was stuck to where I was lying down. I reached for one of her hands and kept it near my chest.

“Xua. Don’t go.” I want to plead. If this is really her. If this is Xua, I don’t want her to go.

“Ms. Xua, I’m sorry for the problem.” Mo-re’s voice surfaced in the room. I realized it, then. I remember how we met again. I’m not supposed to hold onto her in this lifetime anymore. My hands released her hand.

Xua talked to Mo-re before saying goodbye “I’ll go now. Kor, I hope you feel better soon”. I heard the doors closing after that.

I finally had the energy to open my eyes and I saw Mo-re looking down at me. “You should rest for now. The doctor said fatigue took a toll on your body last night, that’s why you fainted.”

My eyes shut at his words. “I found Xua. I finally found her”. My voice weakened after every word. Xua is here now.

Mo-re sighed and I felt him sit beside me. “I’m sorry. We weren’t fast enough.” 

We kept silent and Mo-re sighed once more before continuing. “We already know how your story ends. You already know how this is going to end. It was earlier than we expected, but don’t you think it’s time to go back to the afterlife?”

“If she fails to love you again, you’ll die and will never have a chance to get back to the afterlife. Don’t do this, Kor.” 

Neither of us talked before he left the room, but his words stuck in my head.

July 10th

“For this quarter, we decided to launch most of our PR events on social media accounts. As you can see on the charts, we’ve selected Zaibo, Rok and Ginger to be the main channels. Our target market, 10s to middle 20’s, spends at least 6 hours per day on these platforms.” Mo-re continued to explain our proposal on board.

“What made you think that this will help us? Yes, traffic is great on these platforms but we need more than exposure to attract sales?” Zike pulled his microphone and looked in my direction.

“These platforms have an option to redirect our products back to our website. Since the traffic will be directed back to our platform, we will be able to introduce other services and products. Exposure doesn’t guarantee sales. I understand that.” I flipped through the papers in my hand and looked at Mo-re to proceed to the next slide.

“What we are aiming for here is creating a trend. Agile has been a lifestyle brand for more than 50 years. We have loyal consumers in their 50’s and 60’s. We never fall short of quality but we need to show that we are the leaders of this industry. Through these events, we want to establish that we are the trend.” Zike looked at his papers and read through the page.

“To add to Mr. Li’s words, since the pandemic, people in their 20’s have been more willing to spend money on specific designs rather than quality. Through these social media events, we can introduce Agile as a brand that is still in line with design trends and offers great quality compared to competitors.” Mo-re continued and smiled at the other board members.

Mo-re and I got back to my office after the meeting. “I should have slashed that frog on our fourth tribulation. He’s always petty”, Mo-re ranted after closing the door.

“Then that would have been your last tribulation.” I smiled after remembering our memories back then. 

“I can’t really understand why he forgot his past while we both have all our memories intact” He sighed and pulled out his phone. “It’s not fair that a petty man like him can live his life in ignorance of bliss. Why do we have to suffer like this?” 

“Maybe our crimes back in the afterlife were worse than his.” I picked up my pen and started writing down the details for our next meeting.

“That’s also one thing I don’t understand. We remember all our memories of our past tribulations except for our life in the afterlife.” Mo-re continued ranting.

“Well, maybe you were a fly. It’s better not to remember that, right?” I laughed at the thought.

“Ha! I could have been a fly but you?You could have been a part of the Great Fire while Xua is a part of the Blissful Rain. No wonder she always kills you.”

“That could be true too.” 

Mo-re rushed and walked towards my table. “I didn’t mean it that way. It’s just that you always sought her and–”

“There’s a picture of furniture in Zaibo. It was a table set with two chairs and I think it's great to include that design in our launch this August. Can you connect me to that person?” I ripped a notepad sheet and gave it to him.

He looked at me longer before reading the paper. “No’un? I’ve seen this logo before.” He sat on a chair and scanned his phone.

“Xua” he sighed. “I thought you were not going to bring her up again?” I smiled at his expression.

“She’s No’un”, he mumbled with regret.