Recklessness Like a Child
682 Words
Recklessness like a childRandy tossed the empty bottle of whisky in the trash and Blake eyed him with concern.
"If you are going to keep looking at me like dad go f**k your girlfriend and leave me alone" Randy hissed and his twin squinted, annoyance boiling as he watched the downfall of his brother.
"He's just a guy Randy, forget him, he's ain’t worth the damage you doing to ya liver" Blake said, for the first time in his life taking the responsible path, "I could be with Sandy right now but I'm here, dealing with your sorry drunk ass" Blake downed a shot, "straighten up boy" Blake stood up, "if you don't you'll end up sick and dead, how's Lizzie going to grow up with me her only role model, top being a fucker"
"What do you know" Randy spat and Blake grabbed the collar of his t-shirt and dragged his twin forwards, their faces close and Blake growled.
"You got to be outta your fuckin mind, useless prick, can't even sober up to work, pa's picking up the slack, climb out of the self-pity" Blake threw his brother back into the chair and shook his hands in disgust, "no one has ever had a problem with your liking men, Dee if you keep wallowing you'll be giving up the family name, Pa will not stand for this s**t, you hear me?"
Randy didn't say anything, he looked at the floor, "you hear me!" Blake snapped, and Randy nodded.
"Good" Blake shoved his hands in his jean pockets and spat on the barn floor, a thing he did to get the taste of his foul words out of his mouth, he was the bad one of the family and cursing still made him feel sick. He walked out of the barn, letting the red door slam behind him. He refused to watch his brother be destroyed by the booze and the cocaine and the heart ache. He'd wished he shot Elliot the moment his name passed his brothers lips.
--
Randy looked at his hands and the table. What had he turned into? some heartbroken druggie. He wasn't working, he was never home, he spent the time in the loft of the barn with a small bag of whatever he could get from the street and a bottle of Jack. He knew he was failing the family name, he needed to move on, give Elliot one last goodbye and get it together. Like it was fate his phone rang. he fumbled with his hands until he pressed answer and put it on speaker.
"What the f**k do you want?" Randy hissed.
"I've never heard you curse before" The voice was soft, like he wasn't allowed to be loud.
"I don't want to talk to you"
"then why did you pick up the phone?"
"I'm drunk and stupid" Randy sighed.
"You never get drunk, why?"
"Really Elliot? why? you're f*****g kidding right, you know why you prick." Randy felt the tears pounding against his eyes, he didn't want to cry, he didn't want to let Elliot hear him cry.
"That was a stupid question, you're right, I'm sorry"
"stop. stop it Elliot. Don't say you’re sorry, just be a d**k okay?"
"Not okay, Randy I'm not just going to disappear, you mean too much"
"Stop, please, I can’t do this again, I can't. just...leave me alone"
"No"
"please! why not!" Randy was furious and yelled into the phone he had broken out in a cold sweat.
"Because I love you" Elliot said matter-of-factually, "just...let me speak to you, I miss your voice"
"I know, you write it down all the time"
"You read the letters?" there was a tone of hope in Elliot's voice.
"a few, I burn all of them though, or rip them up" Randy confessed, daggers in his voice.
Elliot deflated, "Randy, Jesus I f****d up okay? I f****d up! I ran off instead of facing the facts that I really really love you"
"No more excuses Elliot"
"Randy, wait"
"f**k off Sargent"
- Writer
