Mending The Broken

Part One

“So you're going to go get it for her.”

"Yep. But I realize I’m going to need some help. Besides, do you have anything better to do, Hetalia?" She leaned back, folding her arms across her partially-developed chest.

"Well, come to think of it, I actually do.”

“W-What?” Elizabeth asked almost silently.

Angelo hid his mischievous grin the moment Elizabeth’s expression changed straight from prideful to pleading. “I could go play a video game, I could write a song, I could sleep, I could watch paint dry, the list goes on..." Angelo chuckled in his deep, sexy, Italian voice. At this, Elisabeth bit the inside of her cheek, trying hard not to laugh. 

Damn it, don't laugh!

He chuckled again. "Eh, but this'll probably give me a bit more adrenaline. I guess breaking into the capitol’s main hospital is a bit more intense a story than getting a new Australium weapon or having a dream about falling." She lifted an amused eyebrow, still trying hard to hide her grinning. "Look, if you can come up with a plan that gets me in and out of there within-" She looked down at her bare wrist as if she were wearing a watch "-less than four hours, without either of us getting caught or manhandled, I'll supply whatever the hell we need to get everything done. Deal?" 

Angelo thought for a moment before his face adopted a rather stern expression. "This was your idea. You're asking me to help. But I'm the one who needs to come up with a plan or I'm going to have to bring the supplies?" He didn't understand.

Elizabeth closed her eyes and shook her head. "No, see, you," She pointed to him, "Are not American. Therefore, you're far smarter than the average bear. That is why you come up with a master plan." She then pointed her finger to herself. "I am a woman, therefore, I tend to get whatever the hell I want. That is why I will supply everything." She clasped her hands together. "Get it? Got it?" She placed her hands once again into her lap. "Good." She grinned like a child who just won a gigantic teddy bear at the state carnival, obviously being extremely satisfied with herself.

He chuckled. "Flattery will get you nowhere, my dear. Casual stereotyping will also get you nowhere."

“Whoever said I was trying to flatter you, good sir?” Elizabeth bat her eyelashes at him innocently, as if she had done absolutely nothing wrong at all. “I was merely stating the facts of the situation.”

He shook his head and laughed a bit more audibly at her. "With that said, I'm in. On one condition.”

“Anything, sire.” She mocked a bow in his direction. She almost regretted the words as they left her lips, but given her situation, she needed his help. As long as whatever his request was would be something she could do that wouldn’t make matters worse. Straightening herself once again, she responded a bit more appropriately. “I’m listening.”

“While in my presence, you're going to speak in a Shakespearean dialect for as long as it takes me to come up with a plan-or until I get bored of it. Whichever comes first." He said.

Now THIS she could do that wouldn’t make matters worse.

She raised her eyebrow once more. "I knoweth both of these things which you speak, and I know of flattery as well, however, sarcasm is such a bittersweetened virtue, I simply cannot help myself but to use it constantly." She smiled sweetly. "On the contrary, why art thou choosing Shakespeare? I understand that it is indeed quite amusing to some, though it becomes somewhat tiresome to others."

Angelo laughed hard enough to get a few weird looks from passersby. "Because my Internet's been out for a few days, and I survive on three things;" He counted on his fingers as he continued, "Iced tea, gummy candies in questionably phallic shapes, and seeing people act stupid." 

Wait a minute, what?

Her smile vanished instantly. "How now, wool-sack, what mutter you? You’re wit’s as thick as Tewkesbury mustard. You speak unskillfully, or, if your knowledge be more, it is much darkened in your malice."

Angelo's face turned completely emotionless "You are indubitably correct, my comrade, though it would be a grand anticlimax to reveal whether this be simple ignorance, or the inner machinations of the maliciousness that is my mind.” He paused for a moment to let his statements sink in a bit more. “That said,” Angelo continued, “I will endure your suffering with you, should it so please you." He said as he put one arm behind his back and one at his stomach and bowed.

Now it begins!

Elizabeth stood her ground. "How can I trust thee again? There's no more faith in thee than in a stranger. Thou art most truly a subtle man as much as you are a tedious fool. To the purpose, in fact, I’ll tickle your catastrophe. Thou art most open to incontinency. If in fact these things art true, then it seems that Fate has us PERFECTLY matched."

"Truly, this does tickle irony's judgement, that on a day of such malevolent conspiring by yourself, we not only should meet, but I should be of such ennui that I would wish to take such a gamble, purely for the exhilaration of lawlessness and rebellion!" He exclaimed.

Touché.

She paused for a moment to catch her breath. It was now that she realized that they were completely surrounded by onlookers and cellphones. She decided to milk it for all it was worth. "How now my sweet creature of bombast? Thou call'st thyself a hotter name than any is in hell, Angelo, for not only dost thou speaketh the truth, but thy words hast neither heat, limb, nor beauty to make thy riches pleasant." Elizabeth grinned. “And yet, I am so readily pleased to make thyself my comrade.”

"Do reassure me that you mean not to disparage the articulation of which you allude to? And do tell me with a clear conscience that you plan not on exploiting this façade of cleverness, for I could very well be granted remission for having such a belief! But alas, with no regard for the veracity of this, we do seem to have attracted quite the audience!" He said as he dramatically posed.

She was becoming slightly agitated by his words, for some strange reason, however, she was thoroughly enjoying every passing minute. "Indeed, my confidant friend. Your words are sharper than your quickened tongue. You, minion, are too saucy. You should be a woman, and yet your deepening voice forbid me to interpret that you are so. Your voice, your frame, and the lack of awareness. Thine face is not even worth sunburning. I am to think that Fate took thee for thy better." She countered, smiling coyly.

Now what does he say to THAT?

Angelo scoffed. "My words are sharp, my wit sharper!" He posed again, obviously making a show. "The mere reality that thou wouldst dishonour my name, not only in character, but in bloodline, by calling myself one akin to yourself in any fashion-in femininity no less..."

She sighed, interrupting him. "Come, Angelo, let our newest adventure begin-"

He bowed again as he grabbed a small ball from his coat pocket, "Truly, your words are a stain on the very fabric of society and humanity!" He declared as he threw the ball on the ground, which then exploded into a cloud of smoke and confetti. When the cloud all but cleared, Angelo was gone, or so it was assumed, until from behind Elizabeth came his voice saying, "And frankly, it's just fuckin' bullshit."

Well done, young grasshopper.

Elizabeth closed her eyes, breaking out of her scold and into a smile. "You're an interesting duck, Angelo," Her voice could barely be heard over the applause of the audience. "Neither you nor I are fit for any place but in hell. And for that, I think we could have quite the adventures. Ci rivedremo presto."