The banging outside has me jumping out of bed. Star is still sleeping. There’s another bang and another. What the hell is going on? I creep into the living space as the banging grows louder and louder. I peer out of the curtains. It's still dark outside but the banging never seizes. I begin to shake and my eyes roll. The medication only helps so much. I still have episodes, but they are usually controllable. But today it’s one of the bad days. The banging continues but it sounds more like gunshots and I cower under the window shouting and screaming out for my brothers in arms. I have no idea how long it goes on for until her eyes are shining in mine. “It's okay Cas. Take deep breaths and count to ten.”
I nod trying my best to do as she says I keep repeating the action until I see her in h
