Howl Your Appellations

Shower Thoughts

BOEN OPEOR

I watch the alpha’s bracelet dangle from my fingers, I’m not supposed to have favorites but this one’s definitely that one I resonate the most, even though I made all the bracelets exactly the same, except for the colors. The combination of colors just tickles me, like purple lilies: Black with dark purples. I’ve never met the alpha before, minus the day that she saved me but I still chose these colors like I’ve met her. I move around the large bath, making sure that the bracelet won’t get wet. I dance around in the water with it, like a little one-sided waltz in the moon light, I laugh at myself for my love struck actions. This is the sort of thing a protagonist in a drama would do! “Why in the world am I so enamoured by the idea of you?” I ask the bracelet dangling before me. The splashes of water as if they share my abashed crush. I twirl a bit more, feeling a pleasant ease with my movements in the water. Ripples, the water’s reply to my ecstasy.

I placed the bracelet on a little empty soap holder near the shower. “That’s enough of you for now. I have to keep you presentable for when I finally meet your owner.” I smile at my apostrophe, and in turn myself. The wine must still be in effect if I’m in such a giddy mood. I rest my arms on the edge of the bath, as if preparing to go to sleep. This is how I like to think when I was in school. Retracing my steps from today I feel that I could get a good grade if we were all graded by god daily; I would have gotten an 83%, depending on which god we ask, I think the results would vary, mine would never give me a perfect score. I draw little gods using the droplets of water on the tiled bath panel. “Skia’s Journal…and Grey…” I murmur. “How and where did I acquire their book? I remember a shack…I called it a dumpster salad I think, or was it somebody else that said it?” this time, I’m allowing myself to dig deeper into my memories lost in time, it’s in there somewhere, the answer I’m looking for: the key to my turn of events.

I let my hair flow with the water and comb it with my fingers. I rub my scalp and let my fingers flow down my semi-long hair, visualizing a stream and a blockage in my mind, there is someone I am forgetting, someone important that had something to do with my ring. I tear up, thinking about the trinket I treasured the most. Now that I think about it, I feel that I’m forgetting more things than I think. The clues in my backpack must have already been pulverized by the creature…even when I know I’m safe here, there’s still this little voice telling me to not think about the creature that stole the future of my left leg. I look at my stub under the water, it looks like a little sausage, “Hehe.” at least I can joke about this now. I wiggle the stub around like I’ve found a new play thing, “Will the alpha be sad that she couldn’t save the whole me?” my thoughts surrender back to the alpha, she must be more important to the recovery of my memories than I realize.  “’What else do I know about her?” I whisper softly. I curl my fingers and began to count what I know about my saviour:

“She hasn’t been back to her pack for almost a month now, she has an intentionally messed up room, her pack loves and respects her very much, and there’s a possibility that she might not come back.” the last one’s pure speculation, pure fiction, but I have been feeling the deep concern they have for her. They weren’t be too worried if she was okay, right? There must be something wrong somewhere, that’s why they’re uneasy about her. Maybe they’ve considered what I’ve considered, maybe she’s already…and they’re all just looking for her body around the forest every night. What a grotesque way to think about things; I don’t truly believe that their alpha is dead. She’s out there somewhere, I bet she’s on her way back to her family pack and maybe for me… “Gyaaaaaahhhhh!!!!” I scream out of embarrassment, and splash away at the water. I may need to stop thinking for a while, focus on the bath and the waters. I submerge my whole body underwater and proceeded to turtle float, and held my breath for as long as I can.

“Hm~~Hm~`Hmm” I hear someone enter the room while humming a carefree tune. “I thought no one would need to take a bath other than me tonight?! Who is it?!” I think to myself in a panic that I lost my concentration and needed to take a breath in. The other person, still humming, decided to occupy the other bath, thank god.  They didn’t notice my gasp and just continued to hum in a carefree manner. It’s a man’s hum and I quickly realized that it was Imus that entered the room oblivious of me being here.

“What do I? What do I do?” I repeat in my head, disabling me from thinking about the next course of action I need to take, my hair dancing carelessly over the water.

“I can hear you, you know? Kaya? Koto? I don’t have my glasses right now or in full form so I can’t see.” He says in a sincere tone. There is no going around it, I don’t sound like Kaya or Koto, I have to tell him I’m Boen.

“Um…Imus?” I say shyly, almost in a perverted kind of way because of panic and embarrassment. I hear a large splash where Imus was bathing, he must have felt a bit embarrassed too. “Um, I can leave, if you want! I..uh..I haven’t showered yet but I can leave, if, if, you want!” I spout.

“No! It’s my fault! I forgot that we had a guest. I didn’t think that you’d take a bath, I thought you’d be tired to. I’m sorry.” I hear water dripping from his wet hair, “I only needed a soak. I’ll be done in a bit.” he tells me.

“Ah, okay. I’ll wait then.” I reply. I’ve never seen a guy’s naked body before, I’ve always hooked up with girls but I always thought guys were okay too. In my case, I just never really had a chance to date someone of the opposite gender, not that I mind. I’m perfectly content with the female anatomy. Seeing Imus’ scar-filled body just reminded me that I never see it too often in real life.

“Did you enjoy today’s activities?” he starts a sudden conversation that caught  me off guard. I was thinking about the male anatomy so much through looking at his that I didn’t think he’d talk. “Today’s the best day I’ve ever had in The Train. I’m eternally grateful.” I reply.

Silence.

“Hmm, so you enjoyed the little tour they gave you, huh?” he finally replies, “Well, I’m glad that you’ve recovered physically. What about your memories? Have they come back yet?” I’m starting to sense a certain apprehension with his line of questioning but maybe I’m just overthinking it, Imus was the one that with Lissana and me at the time. He’s just worried.  “I’ve actually been trying to remember now, I feel like I need my lost memories the most.”  I reply.

Another long silence from Imus. I can’t tell if he can’t hear me properly or that he just needs time to think of the words he needs to say. He sinks down the bath, only leaving his head above water, “Lissana has been gone for a while now…I didn’t estimate for her to be gone this long.” he tells me. This time, I’m the one who stayed silent, I waited for him to continue. “The pack is my family but Lissana is closer to me than that.”

I sit in the bath wide-eyed at this statement, a bond deeper than family, could they be?….

“Do you know about Nike?” he asks me. I rummage my brain for Nike and I remember his room! “He was the previous alpha, I believe, Reese showed me his room. He’s “The number 1 guy!’” I told him honestly, “His room felt special, like he left a bit of his aura there.”

“Hm,” I can feel Imus’ smile from his agreement. “Nike is Lissana’s brother and Nike, to me, was my everything. He was my inhale and exhale, my ebb and my flow.” Imus says this in the softest but also saddest way possible. He used ‘was’ when he described him, a word so devastating in love. “I’m telling you this because it should be known to everyone. As long as I breath in this earth, everyone will be reminded of Nike and his permanence in me.”

Such a strong devotion for love, never have I encountered someone as in love as he is, even when his partner’s already gone. “I understand. I’ll gladly carry this information with me forever.” I tell him. I try to say the words that’s the best possible response to his declaration.

“Good.” he replies. "Then you must know how mush it means to me for Lissana to come back alive." suddenly, I feel a sudden coldness to the air and I see the steam circle around Imus. He grows larger and larger and this is when I realized he's transforming, "Remember as best as you can outsider because I don't have the best temper. I hope you find what you need in the next nights." he fully transforms in a beast of a wolf with beautiful gray-ish white fur, his large canine eyes a lush green.

Imus entered the room as a human and left the room as a wolf of great size. It was at this moment that I thought I saw more than one appellation above his head.