The Day that I hated The Most
871 Words
"Stop crying, Ken."
I lift up my head after I heard that voice.
Her sweet voice that makes me calm everytime I'm not in a mood. The voice that I used to hear since day1. Her voice that I miss a lot.
I saw her. I saw her angelic face.
"D-don't go Zen. P-please don't go" I said with a shakey voice, and cried so hard.
She wipes my tears with her soft hand, and tap my head.
"Don't cry, it'll be okay. It's time for me to rest, Ken. I promise, I will be always by your side. I will watch you from above." she said and tap my head.
It makes me cry harder. I can't lose her. I can't.
"Please live your life to the fullest even without me. I will be your guardian angel, okay?" She said, with a beautiful smile.
She lend her hand to me.
I hold her hand and stand up. I look into her eyes while crying. I don't want her to go.
She wipe up my tears and gave me a look and smile that telling me it will be okay.
She hug me. I hug her so tight while wishing this moment will not end. B-but after a minute, she vanished. She's gone.
I cried so loud.
"Zen don't go, Zen.. Zen....Zennnn!"
*kriiiiingggggggg!*
I opened my eyes. My pillow is wet from my tears. I turned off my alarm and went to the bathroom. I looked into the mirror, and cried.
I washed my face and go to my bed to lay down again. I want to sleep more. I want to see her again. Even if it is only a dream. I miss her so much and..
"Happy birthday to you.. Happy birthday to you.... Happy birthday, Happy birthday... Happy birthday to you~~"
"Happy birthday Ken!"
"Happy birthday bro!"
"Happy birthday son!"
My family suddenly entered my room with a cake, singing happy birthday. Wait... what? ahh.. it's already 21st of September.
The day that I hated the most.
And yea, It's my birthday.
"Thanks." I said, with a poker face.
"Make a wish and blow the candle, son!" my mom said, with full of excitement.
I blowed it. As what they wanted. I blowed the candle as fast as I can and walked out.
"Ken wait..."
They said but I pretend that I don't hear them, and walked away. I want to be alone.
***
I slowly entered the cemetery.
Every step I'm making, it feels like my heart slowly tearing apart. Years already passed but I still feel the same pain from the day that she left. I miss her. I miss her so much.
I put the candles in front of her grave and lit it.
"Hi Zen" I said, while wiping the dirt on her grave and gave her a wide smile. I'm smiling yet my eyes are teary.
"Look, I got your favorite strawberry cake" I put the cake in front of her grave.
"It's your death anniversary Zen. 9 years has passed but I still wishing that this was just a dream."
I smiled bitterly, and started to cry.
"I miss you Zen. I-I miss you so much." I said while crying.
I took my phone in my pocket and played a song.
(?Drew looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see
That I want and I'm needing everything that we should be
I'll bet she's beautiful, that girl he talks about
And she's got everything that I have to live without
Drew talks to me, I laugh 'cause it's just so funny
That I can't even see anyone when he's with me
He says he's so in love, he's finally got it right
I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at night
He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do~ ?)
I can't stop crying while listening to this song. It's her favorite song.
I leaned on her grave and closed my eyes while listening to the song.
Remembering our memories together in the past.
***
(dzzz... dzzz....)
My phone suddenly vibrated. My mom's calling.
"Son, where are you? Are you alright?"
"I'm okay mom, don't worry. I'm on my way home." I said, and hang up the phone.
Goshhh, it's already 1 pm in the afternoon. I didn't notice that I fell asleep here like almost 3 hours.
I wiped my tears and stand up facing her grave.
"I will go for now, Zen. I will comeback tomorrow. I hope youre doin' great there." and gave her a smile.
I bend my knee and faced her grave closely.
"Happy birthday Zen. Happy birthday to us.. My twin." I smiled widely, and walked away slowly.
I miss my twin. I miss her so much.
Today is our 19th birthday. And also her 10th death anniversary.
I hate the day today...
The day today, is the day that she died.
She died on our 10th birthday.
Since that day, the 21st day of September... is the day that I hated the most.
- Writer
