Fake Datin Frances

03: Frances Ha

"Red? Please come get me, I'm at my wits' end. The AKAs are driving me crazy!"

AKA: Arvie, Kira, Andre.

"Oh, honey I'm sure you're driving them crazy too." Red laughs softly as I hear classical music play in the background.

Ugh. Reminds me of a certain someone that I do not want to think about right now.

I met Arvie's sister just a couple of hours ago and she's already ruining my life... and not in the endearing kind of way. I can't even remember her name, that's how insignificant she is.

Ano ba kasi problema nun? (What's her problem anyway?)

I gotta admit, I scared a lot of other actors before that they dropped out of the project, but this one is hard to crack. She's surprisingly very restrained for someone who doesn't have a lot of experience in the industry. I've called her names and have been extra rude inside Kira's office earlier, but she kept her cool.

One thing's for sure though, I will absolutely spoil the chemistry read tomorrow. There is no way that we're gonna be on the same page or create even the slightest connection based on the events today.

If that doesn't work out then they'll just look for a replacement actress and hopefully we'll land with someone more sought-after and well known. I've been wanting to work with Alexis but it sucks how she's not available. I don't believe for a second that she wouldn't want to work with me. Everyone wants a project with Frances.

I opened twitter and automatically see tagged photos of me and Arvie's sister spreading like wildfire. I closed my app right away and didn't feel like lurking on social media for a while.

A few months earlier, some jackass leaked our season two screenplay. It involved me ending up with a girl by the end of this season which means I'm getting a fictional girlfriend. There are theories now that the next love interest is Arvie's sister.

The reaction about that storyline was mixed. There were a lot of discrimination from older people, lots of love from the l***q community, sjws (social justice warriors) started criticizing the plot saying that it might be just another cliche and lazy narrative because well, the gays never catch a break on mainstream media.

I read those and immediately thought I can make a difference here but at the end of the day the network still chose to work with Ariel. There's obviously a reason why he never made it in this industry and I can't believe they're wasting precious screentime with that guy.

After the leaks, people started assuming that I'm into girls and I'm dating Red. She's my best friend and she's openly gay on social media. I mean... they're right. I date men and women but I lean more on the ladies... in secret, Red knows everything. She's a fitness instructor, absolutely gorgeous, she's into androgynous fashion but what we have is the type of relationship where we would practically hurl at the thought of us dating or even kissing.

I've been wanting to come out on national tv but my network said that it's not a good image for future projects and that I might be stereotyped as 'that girl who likes girls' and won't get a lot of offers moving forward.

Ever since then I had this plan in mind to post something on i********: and just come out and totally defy every advice that my network gave me. I sacrificed a lot to get where I am now and I feel like I'm relevant enough to come out and people will not even care about my s****l preference.

I'm gonna come out as bisexual soon and they will all be shitting their pants. People will still love me and I'm gonna prove them all wrong.

Thinking about that gives me this certain kind of satisfaction. In a way I'll be doing it out of spite but it will be awesome.

"Frances what did you do this time?"

"I can't say yet but I didn't work my ass off just to be with some... irrelevant newbie. They're putting someone new on the show... as a main character."

"You do realize that you sound like a total asshole, right?"

"Listen, I worked twice as hard to get into significant projects and she just suddenly swoops in just because she's the director's sister? Ridiculous."

She laughs, "You're lucky the AKAs love you even if you're impossible to work with. Just remember though, it's not always gonna be like that. What if they find someone else? Someone like you, but better?"

"That's not possible. The fans love me. I'm selfless. I give back. I'm pretty and talented. I'm smart and funny. People talk about anything that I do."

"Just... be careful and remember that being kind always gets you somewhere."

"Yeah, back on the burner. If I didn't have such a strong personality Red I don't think I'll even get here."

"Okay, that's your life."

"Stop acting like my mother. Are you picking me up or not?"

"On my way."

I don't know what this party is that she's dragging me into but I heard it involves black and white movies, art and local indie bands.

A couple hours later she arrives, I hop in and we reach a small elegant museum in a beautiful setting. You can see a collection of antique sculpture presented in a modernist display. Lots of fancy-looking people, most of them probably as pretentious as someone I know.

"You invited me to a snooze fest?" I sarcastically remarked as I grabbed a glass of champagne from a passing waiter.

"I know you think everything's boring, Frances but I'm really excited about this event. Just try to shut up for the next few minutes. If we survive this without you acting like a five year old for the entire night, then I'll owe you one."

"There's free champagne so I guess it isn't that bad. Oh, and is that Banna Harbera?!" They are one of my favorite local bands and they just started playing Aside while a black and white movie was projecting onto them. It was hitting their faces as the light slowly dimmed but not dark enough for you to not see where you're going and knock objects off.

Then I see someone familiar step in and my heart skipped a beat.

"Franz, oh my god." Red whispers and nudges me while staring at her.

Suddenly everything stopped and she was the only girl in the room. I couldn't stop smiling as she notices me and walks to our direction.

"Frances... didn't know you were into these kind of things."

"I-"

"Yeah, she's very much into art and black and white films and that movie," Red interrupts and points at the movie being projected on the band.

"Frances Ha," Alexis continues.

"I'm sorry?"

"The movie, it's called Frances Ha."

"Oh, yeah, of course, I knew that, yeah..." I was almost tongue tied. Damn. What's Frances Ha?! I gotta watch that asap. I need to know everything about that movie, dissect every detail where I can have intelligent conversations with her during our first date...

Huh... you think she's gonna say yes to you? She's straight!

"Hi I'm Red, Frances' best friend, huge fan." She was swooning over her while I was standing, frozen, overwhelmed with my thoughts.

"Nice to meet you Red." Her voice was sweet and so gentle.

"So, you waiting on someone or?" I was finally able to open my mouth and utter meaningful sentences.

"Yeah, I'm waiting for my date."

She's on a date. With someone who probably memorizes the entire dialogue to Frances Ha. Someone sophisticated and knows a lot about sculptures and art. Someone elegant and classy, probably a handsome Greek model.

"Alexis."

Someone from behind calls her, now that voice sounds too familiar.

"D!" Alexis' face lights up.

At this point I had so many questions going through my mind:

1. How do they know each other?

2. Why is Arvie's sister here?!

3. Why is she friends with her?!

There's one more question that's buried in the back of my head but I didn't want to allow myself to even entertain that.

"Sorry I'm late." Dean then turns to face me with a smug look on her face, "Oh hi Frances, nice to see you... again."

This b***h.

"Let's go?" Alexis signals Dean then they bade goodbye as they approached some guy who looked like a college professor standing in the corner.

"You knew Dean Mack and you didn't tell me?!" Red elbows me, still staring at them.

Feeling ko binagsakan ako ng langit at lupa. (I feel like heaven and earth fell on me.)

"How do you know Dean? Is she her date? What the f**k is happening..." I looked like I was hypnotized as the words slowly came out of my mouth.

"What?! Are you serious? She's the only Filipino lifestyle tv show host that's based in California. They show some of the episodes on the lifestyle channel. Anyway yeah her show ended a few months ago, so that's probably why she's here now... hmm... wow she looks even taller in real life."

"Red, she's Ariel's replacement. Might be." My voice was low, I honestly wanted to leave this place now and chug down an entire bottle of vodka.

"What- She's the 'nobody' that you were referring to?! Frances, goddamit. Were you rude to her?"

"I kind of was, like... super."

Red slowly covered her face with her hand, "I love you but you seriously need to start watching tv again."

"I don't... she's still not an actress, you know. She's just some tv host, it's not fair."

"Yeah, and she's dating your ultimate crush."

Damn it Red.

I suddenly realized that I'm not the center of the solar system and that the world doesn't revolve around me. There are people existing out there and having fun and actually dating the person that they want.

Okay, Dean. I'm gonna start learning your name and make sure you won't be having fun in the next few months.