Beside You

Beside You Ch. 19: Power 1/2

Chapter Nineteen: Power 1/2

Benny’s alarm went off, scaring me.

“Sorry,” she said.

I laid there staring up at the ceiling.

Even though I slept, I felt exhausted.

Maybe everything from yesterday was catching up with me.

Or maybe it just never leaves, and all of it just keeps piling on.

That feels more like it.

“I feel shitty,” Benny sighed.

I felt that.

“Sorry,” she said, “I’m sure you feel a thousand times worse.”

A thousand?

I felt like I actually had to think about that.

“Probably not a thousand,” I said.

She stared at me, “I didn’t expect you to actually think about it.”

I could hear the worry in her tone.

I smiled slightly at her.

“I’m okay,” I admitted, “Though I think that’s because of you and Gus.”

“I’m glad that we were able to help,” she admitted, “No one should go through something like that alone, or at all, really.”

She wasn’t wrong.

Nobody should have to go through that.

No one should subject you or anyone else to that kind of treatment.

So what if you were big. If that isn’t your type, move on.

Why do people have to bully you because you’re different?

I thought the whole point was to prove yourself to be an individual.

“Hey, Ren.”

I looked over at Benny again. I didn’t realize that my gaze was wandering.

“Yeah?”

“We do love you,” she said earnestly, “Just so you know.”

“I know,” I said, “And I love you guys too.”

She glanced at her closet before she got up.

It’s Friday, and to be honest, I was a little nervous and excited about tomorrow.

“And,” she said once she was at her closet, but she didn’t turn to look at me, “I’m sorry about Michael.”

I felt myself frown.

I didn’t know what I even expected from him.

Human decency, maybe?

He wasn’t all bad.

I just wish that he was more honest. Or I was less blind.

It’s clearly been established that I have feelings for the worst people.

“Ren?”

I glanced up at Benny to see her already fully dressed.

“Are you okay?” she asked, “Really?”

I nodded.

It wasn’t something I had to think about.

If Steven tried to come near me or talk any more s**t, Gus was going to f**k up his day.

It was nice to know that I had people like that.

Everything is so different.

All of this is different.

I got up to get myself dressed.

I wore the uniform skirt and my white button-up.

“Benny,” I said once we were both ready to leave the room.

She gave me her full attention, and that alone was enough to make my heart swell.

“My name isn’t actually Ren,” I admitted.

She looked at me a little confused, “That’s okay.”

I was waiting for her to ask, but she didn’t.

She was waiting for me to be ready to tell her.

I held my hand out to her.

“Bethany Harris,” I said with a grin, “My name is Mayren Graham.”

Her hand gripped mine tightly, “Nice to meet you, bestie.”

What did I do to deserve her?

++++++++++

I didn’t realize how often I searched for Michael.

My eyes went to the gate separating us a little too much.

I wasn’t sure how to feel about everything.

Michael chose to believe Steven.

That is his right, I guess.

Doesn’t make him less of a f*****g jerk.

Now that I really thought about it, I haven’t checked my phone since yesterday.

What if he tried to apologize?

Would that change anything?

I frowned.

Did I want to subject myself to that?

Was it so wrong to hope that the boy I think I love is sorry for f*****g up?

I shouldn’t love someone that can hurt me like that.

I pulled my phone out of my pocket to check, but it was dead.

I forgot to plug the damn thing in.

Why am I this way?

I glared at the device when I heard the whistles.

My last class is over.

Thank god. I can go back to the room and charge my phone.

I changed back into the pink skirt before heading back to my room.

Benny intercepted me like she usually does.

She didn’t grin like normal.

Was everything alright?

She made a face, and when she opened her mouth to speak, nothing came out.

“Benny,” I said softly, “What is it?”

“Steven is in the ER.”

She said it so quietly I barely even heard her.

“What?” I asked, “Since when?”

“Last night,” she said.

“Who…” I gasped, “Who put him there?”

She bit her bottom lip.

“Is Gus okay?” I asked.

She nodded, “Gus is fine.”

So then it was Michael.

“Michael?” I asked, “Is he alright?”

She nodded.

“What happened?” I asked.

“I’m not sure exactly,” she admitted, “Gus texted me about an hour ago.”

“But it happened last night,” I stated, “Why are we only finding out about this now?”

Her gaze locked with mine.

“Let’s go to the room,” she said.

I followed her, and I felt myself shaking.

Once we were in the room and the door was shut, she started to cry.

I started to panic even more.

“What?” I asked as I wrapped my arms around her, “What happened?”

She tried to calm herself down, but that took a little bit.

I held her while she struggled to even her breathing.

“Gus didn’t want to bother us,” she said, “I’m so f*****g mad.”

He didn’t want to bother us?

“He said it was because you went through so much yesterday he didn’t want to worry you,” she said, “And he thought that it would be too hard on me.”

That wasn’t fair.

“What is the point of being partners if he tries to shoulder everything by himself?”

I get why she is upset, but at the same time, I couldn’t quite understand. I’ve never had someone want to hold the weight of the world for me.

“Neither one of us needs protecting,” Benny said, “If something happens, I want to know.”

She moved out of my arms, and I could tell that she was more on the angry side than the sad side.

She pulled her phone out of her bag, and I could see the determination on her face.

I could hear the ringing.

I decided to plug my own phone in while she talked to Gus.

At least, that is who I’m assuming she is calling.

“What?”

The voice that answered was not Gus.

“What the f**k did you do?” Benny demanded.

I heard the sigh from the other end.

“I don’t have the….”

“The time?” she snapped, interrupting him, “You’ll f*****g make the time.”

“Benny,” I could hear the exhaustion in Michael’s voice, “If you let me finish, I was going to say the patience.”

“I don’t care,” she said, “What happened last night?”

“It doesn’t matter,” he said, “It happened.”

“Michael,” she said calmly, “Talk to me.”

“I don’t want to,” he said flatly, “Talk to your f*****g boyfriend.”

The line went dead.

She stared blankly at the wall.

I watched her slowly drop the phone from her face to look at the screen.

She pressed on it again, but the phone just kept ringing and ringing.

“Ren,” she said, “Can I see your phone?”

I glanced over at the device on the nightstand.

The battery was still very much dead.

“It’s dead,” I said, “I’m sorry.”

I even held up the screen to show her.

All it showed was the battery on the screen with the charging symbol.

She frowned.

She went through her phone again.

I could hear the ringing again.

“Hello?”

This voice I didn’t quite recognize.

“Hey Cuz,” Benny said, “How are you?”

I could hear the bit of sarcasm in her tone.

“I guess I could be worse,” he said, “What do you want?”

“Nobody is telling me what happened last night,” she said, “I want you to tell me.”

“Why?” he asked, “If they aren’t, it’s probably for the best.”

I could see the anger on her face.

“Most likely,” she said, “But you will tell me.”

“Or what?” he asked, “You’ll have Gus kick my ass?”

“No,” she said calmly, “I’ll beat the f*****g hell out of you.”

If I didn’t know Benny, I would have been terrified.

She didn’t usually take on that kind of tone.

Her anger was not something to mess with.

“What’s so great about her?” Steven asked, “How can you guys defend that?”

“That?” Benny asked, clearly confused, “That what?”

“Mayren,” Steven hissed, “She’s f*****g nobody, she’s a f*****g freak….”

“Shut your f*****g mouth,” Benny shouted, “You don’t get to talk about her.”

I felt myself shaking.

He didn’t respond.

“She is perfect,” Benny stated, “She doesn’t have to change a single thing about herself, and f**k you for not seeing that.”

I was going to cry.

Fuck, I felt the stinging already.

“So I was right then,” Steven said, “The three of you are a thing?”

“What?” Benny snapped.

“She is f*****g you and Gus,” Steven spat, “Why else would anybody defend her?”

Benny laughed, and that was probably scarier than her yelling at him.

“What’s so funny?” he asked.

“You’re an i***t,” she said, “Why do you care who she f***s?”

He didn’t respond.

“You’re that jealous of everyone else that comes in contact with her,” she said, “You can’t stand the idea of her being with anybody else?”

“f**k you,” Steven hissed.

“I’d rather f**k her,” Benny said calmly, “You jealous piece of shit.”

“She wishes I was jealous,” Steven said, “I wish I never met that fat f*****g cunt.”

Benny took in a deep breath, “You are going to regret that.”

“What?” he asked, “f**k both of you.”

“Tell me what happened, and I won't beat the f**k out of you the next time I see you.”

“Yeah, right,” he laughed, “Good luck with that.”

“Awe,” Benny said as if she was saying it to a child, “You poor baby, are you that scared of Michael and Gus?”

I could hear Steven on the other end. It sounded like someone was hitting their mattress.

“As if,” he said after a minute, “If you want to find out, ask one of them.”

“I’m asking you,” she said.

“Clearly,” he said, “And because they won’t.”

“Yeah,” she said, “I’m pretty sure I already said that. Can we move on?”

“Why are all of you so f*****g annoying?” he asked.

“It’s part of the reason we all get along so well,” she stated, “You were saying?”

“I wasn’t.”

“Then tell me who put you in the hospital,” she said,

 “They didn’t even tell you that much?” Steven laughed, “They really must think that you’re weak.”

“Sure,” she said, “Because I’m the one in the hospital right now.”

“It was Michael,” Steven stated, “Your boy has a temper problem.”

“Yeah,” Benny sighed, “We’ve been trying to work on that.”

“He might even be bipolar,” Steven said, “One minute he’s wailing on me, then he’s crying like a f*****g bitch.”

She looked at me like she didn’t believe him.

This must be the real Steven.

How did I not see it before?

“You should have seen his face,” Steven laughed, “When he realized who I made that bet with in the first place.”

I felt my blood run cold.

“What bet?” Benny asked,

I don’t know if she remembered that part from yesterday.

“The bet to f**k a virgin,” he stated.

Benny’s eyes went wide as she stared at me.

“Michael bet I couldn’t f**k a virgin,” he laughed, “Who would have thought that the very same little virgin would find her way to you guys?”

The bet was Michael?

My legs felt a little wobbly.

I sat on my bed as I stared at Benny.

“Then you clearly lost that bet,” she stated, “Because you didn’t.”

“Well yeah,” he said, “And thank f**k for that, she was repulsive.”

What changed? He was so adamant about the fact that he did have s*x with me.

“Steven,” Benny said, “That’s two.”

“But that wasn’t the last time Michael and I fought yesterday,” he said.

He ignored her warning.

“How many times then?” she asked.

“Eh,” he said. I could hear him humming as he thought about it, “Three times.”

Benny opened her mouth, but he interrupted her.

“No, sorry,” he said, “Just two.”

He didn’t give her the chance to respond before he spoke again.

“It’s hard to keep track, maybe because of the concussion.”

“Being an asshole doesn’t help either,” Benny stated.

“Don’t you want to know the reason for the second fight?” he asked.

“Is it not because of Ren?” she asked.

“Well, at first, yes,” he said, “He didn’t like me calling her a fat cunt either.”

“Three,” Benny stated.

“I forgot how emotional Michael is,” he said, ignoring her again, “It’s easy to forget how he ended up at that school in the first place.”

Benny glanced over at me again.

I could see her hesitation. She wanted to protect Michael, and that was okay.

If she didn’t want me to hear something, it would suck, but I understand.

“See, I knew he had a f****d up childhood,” Steven stated, “Honestly, when I said it, I was just f*****g with him. I didn’t expect him to freak out the way he did.”

“I’m sure you weren’t just messing with him,” Benny stated, “You know what triggers him.”

“Sometimes,” he admitted, “I started by calling Mayren more names, but Gus held him back.”

Benny stood there silently, waiting for him to get on with it.

“But he didn’t actually snap until I said those two little words,” Steven said.

I could hear the satisfaction in his tone.

Two little words? That was it?

Even Benny looked confused.

‘f**k you’ was the only two-word combo I could think of that might piss him off.

I was stumped.

“What did you call him?” I could hear the hesitation as Benny asked.

Steven chuckled, “Are you sure you want me to repeat them?”

Benny stared at me.

“Is little Mayren there listening?” he asked, “Wait, I didn’t mean little.”

“What did you call him?” I asked.

I could hear him clapping on the other end of the line.

“Oh, how upset he’d be if you knew,” he said, “How much do you even know about him, Mayren?”

“I told you before,” I said, “I know what I need to know.”

“I guess,” he said, “Do you even have any ideas as to what two words could set him off so violently?”

It was strange. I knew so little about him, but two words did finally come to mind.

Your mom.

“You could just tell me,” I stated, “Nothing says you have to keep playing the role of the piece of s**t that you are.”

“I get that,” he said, “But it’s much more fun my way.”

“Then what?” I asked, “Destroy him with two little words?”

“It doesn’t mean much if he doesn’t know that you know,” he admitted, “But that’s not really the point.”

“What’s the point then?” I asked, “He beat you up, so now your feelings are hurt?”

“He didn’t just beat me up,” he hissed.

“Who f*****g cares?” Benny asked, “What did you call him?”

“He broke my f*****g leg,” he sounded genuinely hurt, “He didn’t have to keep going, but like the hurt little boy he is, he didn’t stop.”

“Sounds like he isn’t the only hurt little boy,” I said to Benny.

“Right?”

“If that’s how the two of you are going to be,” he snapped, “Then f**k off.”

Benny actually stood there waiting for him to hang up on her.

I think we were both thinking the same thing.

He didn’t end the call.

“An answer for an answer then,” Steven said.

What could he possibly want to know?

“What’s your question?” Benny asked.

“Not you,” Steven said, “Mayren.”