Love and Possibilities

Breathe

Alexei

Alex carries the appetizers out to the deck and he sees a dark haired woman facing away from him. He doesn’t recognize her and then she turns around, his stomach flips, and he feels everything shift as she smiles.

"Hello, I'm Luna Navarro, I came with Jess." She looks directly into his eyes.

He hears a slight accent, but can’t place it. He finally finds his voice. "Oh, I heard she was bringing a friend…nice to meet you, I’m Alex Mishkin the host of Friday with Friends." He automatically reaches his hand out to hers. Electric sparks run through him as their skin connects, his light beige  to her warm amber, and zings right to his center. He pulls his hand away and he breaks eye contact first, looking around but no one is close by. "Would you like to try one?" He holds out the tray. "They are my latest flavor explosion; it has bacon, apple, my own raspberry pepper jelly and Bosina Robiola cheese inside fried dough.

He notices how tall she is, only a couple of inches shorter than his six foot, two inches and then he notices her heels. Her toeless pumps must be at least five inches tall and somehow she makes them work in her tight designer jeans and cream colored, sleeveless blouse that dips down just enough to see a hint of her cleavage. He quickly pulls his eyes away.

Luna picks one up and takes a bite and her eyes slowly close. "Oh...my...God," she moans. “These are phenomenal.”

He is staring at her mouth now and sees a crumb on her lips. Of its own accord, his hand reaches up and his fingertips lightly brush it off. His cheeks heat up when he realizes what he’s done and then she smiles wider.

"Oh, sorry." He doesn’t understand what the hell is wrong with him.

"It's quite alright." Her hand slides down his upper arm and then away. "If your appetizers are this delicious I can't wait for the main course."

The heat from the brief contact seems to spread and creates a fire within him. "It will be ready in about an hour, make yourself comfortable and feel free to look around the gardens." He turns and makes a hasty retreat back into the house.

In his large open kitchen, Charlie finds Alex with his hands on the counter, head forward and breathing hard. "Hey Alex, buddy, what's going on? You look like crap, are you okay?"

"No, yeah, I mean...there is a woman on the back deck." He growls

Charlie chuckles, "You mean the hot babe your new writer friend brought to the party?"

"You saw her?" His breathing is finally slowing down “And she’s not a babe she’s a woman, must you always use objectifying names for them?”

"Alex, you know I just meant she is very attractive. Sheesh! Are you going to have Jess introduce you?"

"No, we already met. She's so intense and I can’t breathe around her."

"Wow, dude, seriously? She may be hot, but she isn’t worth dying from lack of oxygen.” Charlie with his boy next store good looks and Alex with his dark and brooding nature, have been best friends since grade school and Charlie has had more girlfriends than Alex can remember. Charlie lived down the street from him when they were young boys and they became fast friends doing almost everything together ever since, but his ‘love ‘em and leave ‘em attitude gets old. "Hey relax, no woman is worth getting this upset over ." His hand comes up and rests on Alex’s back. "Do you need anything?"

Slowly Alex regains control. He's not had a panic attack like this in years.

"No, I'm fine." He moves around the kitchen doing the finishing touches on dinner. He feels more in control with each passing minute. He looks at his deep red six burner gas stove and remembers the day he bought it, the large kitchen island that he made with his own hands, and the stone counters that he handpicked and breathes deeply.

"Okay, well, the appetizers are a big hit. Everyone is moaning out there." Charlie laughs. "It almost sounds like an orgy."

"Great, glad to hear it." He says distractedly as he moves around the kitchen putting everything in its place. Salt and Pepper next to the stove an inch apart. The butter in the fridge door, perfectly spaced in the center before closing it up. The spoon for the beans is crooked on the spoon holder and he straightens it. He opens the oven when the timer goes off and he pulls out the iron pot with the roast he's been slow cooking all day. He lifts the lid and drizzles a bit of the juices over the top and sets it aside to rest. He made it Brazilian style this time.

Charlie shakes his head. “Hey snap out of it, Alex, did you hear me, they are loving your appetizers.”

Alex turns and looks at him. “Oh, uh, thanks.” Charlie gives up and goes back into the living room.

The cilantro rice is just finishing up and his black beans are staying warm on the stove. He heats up the cast iron grill and pours oil over it. He slices the plantains and feels his body relaxing further, his knife cutting through each slice with each breath. Before long he doesn't know what the big deal is. She's just a woman. Okay so she’s an attractive, dark haired, woman with a body a man could hold onto, firm, with curves. Not too skinny. He hated how skinny some women thought they needed to be. He finished frying the plantains and began setting all of the condiments out on the large farm table he had sitting on the back deck. He tried to look around without being noticeable, but he didn’t see her.

He had fifteen, no sixteen counting Luna, guests this evening. Fridays are his day to spend doing one of his favorite things, cooking and sharing it with his friends. He spent the whole day preparing and making sure everything was just right inside and out. This old farmhouse that he restored mostly with his own hands, ended up being the perfect place for entertaining. He had plenty of room for anyone who drinks too much and can’t go home or just wants to spend the night and have his famous breakfast in the morning. He hums to himself trying not to think of the beautiful woman and her intense eyes.

Luna

 Luna is watching him as he moves in and out of the house setting everything on the table. He is wearing low hanging jeans, a stone burgundy t-shirt that he fills out nicely with his lean muscles, and bare feet. He has a golden brown curling strand of hair hanging over his left temple and eye that escaped his ponytail that makes her want to pull the hair tie out and run her fingers through it.  

He adjusts the glasses, the silverware, the condiments, like he is measuring the spaces between.  She is back in the shade of the trees in the garden not wanting him to see her again just yet. When he first walked out she knew she'd been right to seek him out. There was definitely something about him and she felt the sparks between them. His smile, his dimples, and then when he blushed she wanted to claim his mouth in that instant, but restrained herself. She had noticed how flustered he'd become at her touch and now how he places everything on the table. She wants to stroke him, calm him. It had been years since she wanted to be with a man and this one so far seems like a perfect fit.

Women were so much easier. Flattery and attention worked with them, but men, they could be so sensitive about women making the first move. She had to be careful. But then again, he had touched her first, brushing his fingers over her lips. It had surprised her and she had to further restrain her reaction, her sudden need to step in close to him.

People began coming out of the house and sitting down. She wants to be close to him, but she doesn't know if there are seating arrangements. She decides to claim one of the chairs next to the head of the table where she presumes he will be sitting.

Alexei

Alex carries the roast, the last thing to set on the long, farm table and everyone has gathered around, most already sitting. Several of his friends had supplied red wine for dinner and some of which are already open on the table. There is ice water in pitchers and an ice chest full of sodas for anyone who wants them. He moves to sit down and sees her sitting next to his seat. He freezes for half a second and then sits down without looking at her. She is talking to Jeannie on the other side of her about digital marketing which captures his interest. He listens until he knows he has to begin because the food will get cold and he knows his friends are hungry.

He taps his water glass with his butter knife and stands up. He raises his glass of wine Charlie had filled for him just a moment ago. "I want to thank all of you for being here tonight. It fills me with joy to share my creations with you. Eat and have fun!"

Choruses of, "Salute, here here, and thank you, rise up around the table and every one took a sip of their wine, soda or water before digging in. He watches and waits as his friends fill their plates and once they are finished, he fills his own. Black beans first, rice, then the shredded roast beef and plantains. Next he puts a generous amount of cilantro and squeezes the lime over the whole thing. He is the last to take a bite. He closes his eyes and chews slowly tasting the different flavors, pleased with how it turned out.

At first not many were talking as the food occupied their mouths, but slowly conversations began popping up around the table after many compliments came down to him. He thought he was doing well, pretending she wasn’t sitting next to him and then she spoke.

"Do you cook for your friends every Friday night?"

He notices her slight accent again, Italian maybe but that doesn’t match with her name. Of course names don’t always tell everything about a person. His last name is Russian but he looks more like his mother and her Mexican heritage, but he has lighter skin tones which he got from his father and thankfully, his height. He finishes chewing the bite that suddenly feels much larger in his mouth as he remembers she asked him a question. "Yes, I love to cook and experiment here and there. My friends love to eat so it is a perfect combination for a weekly event." A small smile touches his lips as he looks out and sees how happy the people he cares most about, besides his parents, are enjoying his food and tries not to look directly at her.

"This is quite good, I didn't know what to expect but it is delicious."

He can’t help it and he looks toward her and finds her looking at him with those intense dark eyes. "Thank you, I'm glad you're enjoying it. How do you know Jess?" He’s surprised at how normal he sounds.

"She's a friend of a friend."

He is quiet for a moment, expecting her to say more. He wants to know why she chose to come tonight, but couldn't seem to get the words out. She is watching him as he takes his next bite and he feels heat moving through his cheeks again. He is appalled at how much his face is betraying him. He looks up and she is smiling again and he inhales as his breathing hitches and he feels heat spreading through his body and then he chokes.

She reaches around and pats his back. "Breathe, Alex, breathe."

His name on her lips has him spiraling down as he coughs the bite of food finally moves down his throat and he takes a long sip of water. Her hand is still on his back moving in circles. "Are you alright?" She slowly pulls her hand away and sets it in her lap.

"Yes, thank you." Other's had stopped eating and were looking down the table at him. "I'm fine, really go back to eating." He waves them off and slowly everyone turns back and begins talking and devouring their food again.

"So what made you decide to join us tonight?" There, he asked.

She looks over at him. "Do you really want to know or are you making conversation?"

He almost chokes at her bluntness. His mother is the only woman he has ever known to speak her mind so openly. He clears his throat as he tries to decide if he really wants to know or not. He finally says quietly, "I want to know."

"I wanted to meet you. I read the online article, 10 Artsy Bachelors in New York State and saw your photos. I called Jess, talked to her about it and she invited me to come along tonight."

He didn’t know whether to curse Jess for that article or kneel at her feet and thank her. He swallowed hard. "Why?" The heat that seems to come with being in her presence is stirring into a bonfire within him.

"It was a feeling of possibilities and I never ignore it when that feeling comes over me. It has served me well in business and I didn't think I should ignore it even though this is personal."

"What do you do, I heard you mentioning digital marketing earlier." He’s the host, he can’t leave the table. He slows his breathing trying to stay in control.

"Digital marketing is a passion of mine. Is Alex short for Alexander?"

He can’t imagine digital marketing being anyone’s passion. He notices her change in subject. "Actually it’s Alexei, my father is Russian and my mother is Mexican. I am first generation for both of them." He clamps his mouth shut. Why is he telling her this?

"Alexei, I like that much better. And your parents, do they live around here?"

The sound of his real name on her lips with just that hint of an accent is pulling him under. Feeling like he is barely keeping his head above water, he answers her, each word being pulled out of him. "Yes, about an hour away. I see them every Sunday, they come over and I cook them brunch. We usually spend the day outside if it’s nice, sometimes we play board games and sometimes we watch a movie if there is something we’re all interested in."

“That’s very sweet of you to cook for them. I bet they are proud of their baby boy all grown up.”

It is like everything that is coming out of her mouth is one thing, but there is so much more meaning in her eyes. He tries to laugh, but it comes out a little strangled. “I don’t know about all grown up, but yeah, they’ve always been proud of me.”

She takes a sip of her wine. He notices the wine glass is still quite full but her water glass is nearly empty. He takes another bite and he closes his eyes forgetting everything else in that moment as the flavors move over his tongue. When he opens them back up he notices she is staring at his lips and then she looks up into his eyes.

"You really enjoy your food, don't you?"

"I learned a long time ago life is short and to savor every moment." His breathing hitches as an image of red flashes in front of his eyes. He slowly breathes in and out as his fingers move up and down over the table cloth, feeling the textures on his finger tips he counts the flowers on the bush nearby, remembering tools he’d not had to use in so long.

"Are you alright?"

Alexei’s head jerks and he turns to face her. Her hair flows over her shoulders in gentle waves. He is definitely attracted to this woman. He can't remember feeling like this with anyone, ever, but it is wreaking havoc on his senses and making him feel like he hadn’t spent years coming to terms with the past and putting an end to his panic attacks. He suddenly wants to call his mother to ask what she felt the first time she met his father.

Luna reaches out and covers his hand with both of hers. "Breathe, Alexei," She whispers.

Alexei hadn't realized he had been holding his breath. The combination of her voice and touch feels like a warm blanket wraps around him and he suddenly feels calm. He looks down at her hands and is surprised by her nails, though well manicured, are short with clear polish. Somehow it doesn’t match the rest of her. He looks up and she is smiling again. She pulls her hands back though keeping them on the table in front of her.

That was the third or fourth time she had touched him. Women don't normally touch unless they are interested. He knows at least this much about them. Many women had touched him over the years, small gestures, hand, arm, back, but few did he feel inclined to touch back. He wonders what her skin feels like, her hands had been soft and he is sure the rest of her is as soft as the silk blouse she is wearing.

Alexei shakes his head and pulls himself back, glances up and realizes everyone has finished eating and he stands up. "I have a special dessert tonight, Dulce de Leche Cheesecake. I also created a dark chocolate cheesecake for you die hard chocolate fans." He smiles and several ooohs roll around the table. He steps away and pulls the cart over as he takes everyone's plates and stacks them up. He pulls out the desert plates from beneath and sets them on the small table behind his chair. He went into the kitchen to get the cheesecakes and he hears something behind him. He turns and Luna is there. He automatically steps back.

"I thought you might need a hand as there are at least two cheesecakes."

"Um, thanks." He pulls out one of them from the fridge and hands it to her and he takes the other one. She follows him back to the table outside. He sets his on the small table behind his chair and motions her to do the same. She scoots the dessert plates over to him and then she picks up the dessert spatula. “Why don't I dish them up and you can hand them out?"

"O-okay."

It is suddenly quiet as everyone is watching them. Alexei frowns at Charlie and Charlie starts talking to Jess next to him and others begin talking again too. He makes his way around the table giving people their choice of cheesecakes and a couple of people want a sliver of each. Finally there are only two plates left.

"I'll take two slivers, one of each." He told her. She places each sliver onto his plate and repeats the same for herself and they both sit down. Moans erupt around the table as they take their first bites and he smiles. He loves to hear that sound because he knows they are enjoying his creations.  

A little later all of his friends begin clearing the table and bringing everything to the kitchen. They help him clean up as much as he will let them. He likes everything done a certain way and most of them know that. Once they have done the little they know he'd allow they vacated the kitchen to go out into the yard to enjoy what light is left of the day.

He jerks as he turns because he sees Luna standing in the doorway half in the light. His skin feels like it is on inside out.

Luna

 She steps into the full light of the kitchen. “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you. Can I help?” She notices how everything is spaced perfectly and says, "I can wash, while you dry and put away." Most who know her well would probably laugh if they knew she was offering to wash dishes, but she needs an excuse to be near him.

His mouth twitches and finally he says, "It’s Okay, I...sure." Her body brushes against him as she moves past him to the sink. As she washes dishes she hands them to him after rinsing them and her fingers slide along his as she pulls away. She notices he is not avoiding her touch, even lingers sometimes. Definitely a good sign.

They continue in silence until everything is washed, wiped down, and put away. As he turns around, she steps in close, raises her hand to his chest, looks up and whispers, "I am a very direct woman and when I see something I want I find a way to make it mine. How do you feel about strong women, Alexei, who make the first move?" She says with quiet intensity.

"I don't know, Luna, it's never happened before." His eyes are burning into her.

She likes the sound of her name on his lips and she slowly smiles. "No woman has dared to ask you out?" She can’t believe that, he is too handsome for women to stay away, unless he has discouraged them. He certainly doesn’t seem to be discouraging her.

He hesitates and then says. "No, not that I can remember.”

She can no longer resist, she leans in to give him a quick kiss on his sexy lips and he unexpectedly opens to her. She steps in as their kiss deepens and his arms go around her and her hands go up, pulls the tie out of his hair and it falls to his shoulders. Her fingers thread through the soft strands.

A throat clears behind them. “Uh, sorry, I was told there is more wine in here somewhere.” Charlie says.

Luna steps back and moves to her left and then turns around smiling. Alexei is moving around the kitchen island to the pantry.

“It’s in here, Charlie.” He opens the door and points to a crate of wine, frowning at him.

“Ooooh, you got the good stuff too!” Charlie said as he spied vodka on the shelf above the wine.

“You can take out the Elit for martinis, but leave the Beluga Gold Line.”

“Aw you’re no fun.” Charlie grumbles, but he takes the Elit and a couple of bottles of wine out with him. He looks over his should and whispers to Alexei, “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”  And he chuckles as he heads out through the doorway. “Hey, Hey, look what I found!” He hollers in the other room.

“Sorry about that.” Alexei says to Luna.

“Sorry about the interruption or the kiss?” She asks eyeing him.

He runs his hand through his hair. “Definitely the interruption.”

She is leaning against the counter on the other side of the island, smiling. “Sorry about the hair, I’ve wanted to pull it down all evening.”

He smiles crookedly. “No worries, I only had it up because I was cooking.”

“Alexei, now how do you feel about a strong woman making the first move?”

“I think I like it.”

“Only think? She frowns slightly.

“No, I mean yes, I like it.” He said realizing he upset her.  

She walks around to the other side of the island and stands a couple of feet in front of him. “I am interested in you, Alexei, and I’ve not been interested in a man for many years.” He looks at her questioningly.

“I don’t like labels but if I have to have one I’d say I’m bi, but mostly my choices have to do with the person and not whether they are male or female. I’ve been dating women exclusively for awhile. Does that bother you?”

“No, should it?”

“Some men would take issue with it.”

“I’m not one of them. My parents taught me love is love and it doesn’t matter who they are or what they look like. In fact my mother has asked me a couple of times if I’m gay.” He smirks.

She chuckles, after their kiss she is pretty sure he isn’t. “And what was your answer?”

“I have only been interested in women, so far, and never felt anything beyond friendship for a man, so I don’t think I’m gay.”

“Is there anyone you’re interested in now, Alexei?” She takes a step closer to him.

He clears his throat and takes a step toward her. They are so close she feels his breath on her mouth as her head tilts up just a bit.

“At the moment, Luna, you are the only one I’m interested in.” And he leans down and brushes his lips to hers. 

She opens to him and lets him explore her and then she forces herself to step back. “I have to leave soon, I have a previous engagement that I have to attend. Would you like to have dinner tomorrow night?”

“I can make us dinner here…”

She chuckles, “I think it would be wiser for us to go out. If I come here I don’t think I’ll be able to keep from doing things you may not be ready for.”

“And what may that be, Luna, maybe I would be open to it.” His smoky grey eyes grow darker.

“Maybe, but I want to move just a little slower, I don’t want to scare you off.”  She steps in and presses him back against the island. “When I said I was a strong woman, I wasn’t kidding.” One hand slides into his hair, tightens and pulls his mouth down to hers as her other hand slides over his chest and pinches his n****e. He groans and she feels him grow between them. That tells her all she needs to know for now. She lets go and steps back “I’ll pick you up tomorrow at six. If you still have it, wear the suit from your photo shoot, it looks really great on you.”

His eyes are dark and his breathing is unsteady. “Yeah, suit, yes I have that suit. But I can pick you up.”

“I will be here, tomorrow, at six. Be ready.” She turns and is out the door.

Alexei

He hears several people telling her goodbye and then the front door closes. He is still standing there dazed when Charlie walks in.

“Wow, she is a freaking knock out. Tell me you asked her out.”

Alexei shook his head and Charlie begins to berate him and he holds up his hand to stop him.

“No, she asked me out. We are going to dinner tomorrow night. I have to wear a suit and she’s picking me up.”  He blurts out.

“Whoa… you okay, Alex? You don’t look so good.”

Alex feels clammy. “Yeah, I’m fine.” He walks around the island, pulls down a glass and fills it with ice and water. He takes a long drink of it and then sets it down, still holding the glass.

“So she asked you out, and what’s this about you having to wear a suit, did she tell you, you had to wear a suit?”

Alexei nods his head. “Yep, and that she is going to pick me up, she wouldn’t even consider me picking her up.”

“Maybe she’s a control freak, you have to be careful because if she is one of those she’ll be running your life.” Charlie looks concerned. “Doesn’t matter how hot she is you don’t want that.”

Alexei keeps his mouth closed and knows in his bones there is a whole lot more to Luna Navarro.