Years After You

Kabanata 2

Library

After last night when I went home sober, hindi ako masyadong nakatulog kakaisip sa sinabi niya. Kaya’t eto ako puyat, masakit din ang ulo dahil sa alak at tambay sa banyo kakasuka. Good thing it’s Sunday, I need to go to church, but I don’t think I can. I feel like buong internal organs ko ay lalabas. I’ll just stay here and maybe order food. I also don’t feel like cooking. Grabe ang nararamdaman kong hangover.

It’s already past noon, I’m hungry and just ordered soup to suppress the headache I’m feeling. I also drink medicine para umayos ang pakiramdam ko. Ugh. I will never drink again.

It’s so boring, but at the same time, I don’t want to go outside.

Naligo na lang ako para mas maayos na maka-recover from hangover.

I wore my usual workout clothes. I’ll go to the building’s gym para kahit papaano naman ay productive ako.

I got up and went to the gym. I’m going to do some treadmills, I wore my ear pods and play a song para mas relaxing. In the middle of my workout, may taong gumamit ng treadmill sa gilid ko. Nilingon ko and guess, what? The a-hole Zach.

I stopped.

“Ugh. You’ve got to be kidding me.” I muttered.

“What? Can’t I use the equipment of the building? I live here.” he said

I just continue walking out, away from him. Can’t I have a little peace and quiet workout?

I can feel footsteps behind me, sinusundan niya ‘ko. Aso ba ‘to kaya buntot ng buntot? Hindi naman niya ‘ko amo. Argh!

Hinarap ko siya, “What do you want?”

Halata sa mukha niyang nabigla siya.

“Uh, I just wanted to say I’m sorry for what happened last night.”

Wow, marunong din pala mag-sorry ‘to?

“Okay.” walang gana kong sagot, at tumalikod na ulit.

Ayoko na makipagtalo, okay na rin akong humingi siya ng tawad. Mukha naman siyang sincere.

I just went down sa lobby to get coffee before going back to my unit.

“Hi, can I get one tall iced white chocolate mocha to go please.” sabi ko sa staff and handed her a 500 peso bill.

“Okay ma’am, your name na lang po?”

“It’s Raiah.”

After I paid for my coffee and waited for it, I just scrolled for a minute on my socials. I don’t have a lot of friends on f*******:, just family and close friends. Plain boring.

“One tall iced white chocolate mocha for Ms. Raiah.” sabi ng staff at the counter.

I got up and grabbed my coffee.

As the elevator got up. Huminto ito sa gym, may sasakay pataas.

The door opened, siya na naman. Sobrang liit ba ng building na ‘to at lagi kaming magkikita?

Sumakay na lang din siya without saying a word. It stops at my floor. 8th.

Hindi ko nakitang pumindot siya ng button kung saan siya pupunta, don’t tell me same floor kami?!

Ooh, this is so not going to happen, please.

Nauna akong lumabas sa kanya. Mabilis akong naglakad papunta sa pintuan ng unit ko.

“It seems that we’re neighbors.” saad niya habang tinitipa ang passcode sa kanyang pintuan.

Napailing na lang ako. The world hates me.

My evening went smoothly. I just rest my body and mind. Mabilis lang din akong nakatulog dahil sa pagod.

It’s now Monday.

I don’t feel like going to school pero kailangan kasi I have class and quizzes, and speaking of quizzes… I’m doomed.

Hindi ako nakapagreview! Well, I still have enough time to review.

Binilisan kong gumayak at dumaan muna sa isang coffee shop near school para bumili ng kape. I badly need this para makapag-focus ng maayos. Ramdam ko pa rin yung hangover pero tiis.

Note to self talaga: alamin muna sched for the following week bago pumarty.

Dumiretso na ‘ko sa library para magreview. Eto talaga yung lugar na paborito ko. Tahimik.

Nilabas ko na mga notes ko and start to review. Ramdam na ramdam ko yung gumuguhit na gustong lumabas sa bibig ko. Nasusuka na naman ako. Nagpunta muna ako sa banyo dahil ‘di ko na kaya, ibubuhos ko na lahat dahil ayokong sumuka during quiz. Halos pati organs ko gusto ng lumabas. I texted one of my friends na bilhan ako ng gamot for a hangover. Brent came rushing in and asked me if I was really okay. Siguro if I take these meds, masu-survive ko ‘tong araw na ‘to. Lumapit ako sa mga shelves to get some books and may narinig akong kaluskos at may umuungol.

What the heck is that?!

Sinilip ko sa space between the shelves, may nagm-make out!!

Sa sobrang pagka-curious ko, pinuntahan ko na nga 'to check sino ba ang mga ‘yon. Mukha lang ng babae ang nakikita ko dahil nakatalikod sakin yung lalaki. I think yung girl is from our cheer dance group, and the boy based on his jacket, siya ay basketball player. I don’t want to be rude, but now I am, dahil ‘di naman ito motel. I cleared my throat as I scanned some books and looked at them.

The girl looked flushed, hiya ka ba? Ungol ka pa diyan.

The boy looked at me and medyo gulat ako dahil si Zach iyon. I just pretended that I saw nothing and left them there. Bumalik na lang ako sa table ko and continue to review. I tried to focus on my notes, but the image kept flashing on my mind. Nad-distract ako sa nakita ko. Umalis na lang ako doon and pina-log ang book na kailangan ko, ibabalik ko na lang later.

Dumiretso na ‘ko sa assigned room namin, nabasa ulit ako notes habang wala pang prof. Ayoko na nang dahil lang sa nakita ko ay babagsak ako dito. I just think na lang na ‘di ko sila kilala, and they’re just a nobody to me.

Natapos naman ang quiz na maayos at nakasagot naman ako, I even got a perfect score which I didn’t expect. Lagi naman akong nakakakuha ng perfect mark but this one is different. Well, I guess effective ang pag-meditate.

Nakahinga na rin ako ng maluwag nung hindi ko na rin maramdaman yung hangover ko. I went to cafeteria after my class, sobrang gutom ko na dahil kape lang ang laman ng tiyan ko and isinuka ko pa kanina. Thanks to Brent talaga but I don't usually drink medicine kapag may sakit unless I can't tolerate it anymore, kahit na med student ako, there were some cases kasi na nagiging dependent ang body natin sa gamot and it's bad.

I just ordered lasagna with garlic bread and some orange juice. Kinain ko na din naman agad iyon dahil gutom na gutom na 'ko, I finished eating for 30 minutes. I just have one class left and tumambay muna ako sa isang malaking puno to relax.

Ang presko and damang-dama ko yung lamig ng hangin, ang sarap sa pakiramdam. Feeling ko makakatulog ako when suddenly may pumatak sa pisngi ko, umuulan na. Wala akong payong kaya’t dali-dali akong tumakbo, medyo malayo pa yung shed ng hallway. Biglang may kumalong sakin para ‘di ako mabasa, kinalong niya ‘ko sa jacket niya habang sabay kaming tumatakbo. Nung makarating kami sa hallway, tiningnan ko kung sino ito and it was him.

“Thanks.” I said casually habang nagpupunas ng sarili.

“About earlier –” paliwanag niya ngunit pinutol ko na siya.

“It’s okay. I don’t actually mind. If you’ll excuse me, I still have class to attend.” sabi ko at iniwan ko na siya doon.

Class went smoothly and so was the day. Tiring but productive naman. Bumalik ako sa library para isoli ang librong hiniram ko. Medyo wala na ring tao doon dahil hapon na nga at may mga nag-uuwian na. Hindi rin naman ako nagtagal doon dahil kailangan ko pang bumili ng groceries.

Palabas na 'ko ng library, nagulat naman ako noong biglang bumungad sa harap ko si Zach. Is he here to make out again?! I looked back sa loob pero wala naman akong napansing babaeng naghihintay. Nagkatinginan lang kami at nilagpasan ko siya nung bigla niya naman akong hinawakan sa braso. Napatingin lang ako sa kamay niya sa braso ko, what is he doing? I looked at him curiously. Now what?

"You didn't let me explain earlier."

"Huh? You don't have to. Besides, we don't have anything to do with each other."

"Well, I do. It won't happen again, I promise."

Kunot noo lang akong nakatingin sa kanya.

Ano daw?

Why is he promising?

Bahala na, wala naman akong pake sa kanya.

I walked away without saying goodbye to him. What happened today is way too much for me. Umuwi na lang ako ng condo at nagpahinga, nawalan na din ako ng mag-grocery, bukas na lang siguro. I will just cook kung anong meron na natira sa stocks ko. Matutulog na lang naman ako at sana walang mga asungot na dumating.